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A man took his wife to the Rodeo and one of the exhibits is that of breeding bulls. They went up to the first pen and there was a sign that said, "This bull mated 50 times last year." The wife poked her husband in the ribs and said, "He mated 50 times last year!" They walked a little further and saw another pen with a sign that said, "This bull mated 120 times last year!" The wife hit her husband and said, "That's more than twice a week! You could learn a lot from him." They walked further and a third pen had a bull with a sign saying, "This bull mated 365 times last year!!" The wife got really excited and said, "That's once a day. You could REALLY learn something from this one." The husband looked at her and said, "Go up and ask him if it was with the same cow." The husband is expected to recover

Three contractors are bidding to fix a broken fence at the White House. A Yankee, a Mexican, and a Texan. They go together with a White House official to examine the fence. The Yankee contractor takes out a tape measure and does some measuring, then works some figures with a pencil. "Well," he says, "I figure the job will run about $900: $400 for materials, $400 for my crew and $100 profit for me." The Mexican contractor also does some measuring and figuring, then says, "I can do this job for $700: $300 for materials, $300 for my crew and $100 profit for me." The Texan contractor doesn't measure or figure, but leans over to the White House official and whispers, "$2,700." The official, incredulous, says, "You didn't even measure like the other guys! How did you come up with such a high figure!?!?" The Texan contractor whispers back, "$1,000 for me, $1,000 for you, and we hire the Mexican to fix the fence." "Done!" replies the government official.

Full disclosure: I'm clueless about skydiving. We run a little glider club at a busy non-towered airport. There is a jump-zone up the road at a neighboring airport. No issues. Their airport is going to shutdown for construction, this summer, and the jump zone is going to temporarily relocated to our little slice of heaven. We're thrilled to have them! But, we need to figure out how to deconflict airspace between gliders and skydivers. I figured a good place to start would be to see if anyone here has experience doing that. Any suggestions on what works and what doesn't? Thanks! -Rob

From: avweb.com "Any pilot whose medical expires after March 30 can continue to fly until June 30 without renewing in light of the novel coronavirus crisis. The FAA announced on Friday it will not be enforcing medical expirations during that period so that medical personnel can focus on dealing with the pandemic. “The Notice states that from March 31, 2020 to June 30, 2020, the FAA will not take legal enforcement action against any person serving as a required pilot flight crew member or flight engineer who holds a medical certificate that expires within this time period,” AOPA quoted an email from FAA staff as reporting."

Just like the laws regarding electrical outlets but we call it code.

A positive from my world. Hubby took the past four days and today off from his "essential" job. So far we have installed irrigation for the garden and greenhouse, built a gate for the garden, tilled about 1/3 of the garden area, chopped down and processed a tree and some holly bushes, done a dump run, fixed a couple electrical issues, fixed the front gate and organized the garage pantry. Today we are doing as little as possible. As soon as I can talk him into taking a month or two off work so he doesn't bring anything home once this virus truly spikes next month as predicted... I can't even imagine all the stuff we can get done! Good luck with the hives!

But I think the difference between our outlooks is whether we look forward and see opportunity or problems. I see the opportunity as outweighing the problems. We’ll have problems no matter what we do. But planning around a static state and solving those problems is always a losing game. Wendy P.

Access to and devices they can use aren't the same thing. I can read and respond to emails all day long on my mobile device, but I can't begin to work from that platform. There are still efforts to build out internet access to rural areas around the planet, as well as efforts to provide devices for schools to use. Starlink looks to be doing a rather decent job of getting their infrastructure in place. We currently have 2 of our grandsons here in FL hiding from the virus issue. They live in the Atlanta metro area, and have some rather impressive virtual classroom access with solid content and active teachers.

South Korea had a massive mobilization, with drive-thru testing and lockdowns of entire cities. And the only reason the US is behind is because of the CDC's test accuracy? Got it.

Flatten where? In the US? You are absolutely dreaming if you think thats going to happen within the next month.

Rich, if I strike out with you, I know I am on the right track. That's like having Bernie Madoff call me a bad investor.

almost, at least how i understand it. the spike is getting ready to flatten, then we can ease up and allow it to continue without overwhelming the healthcare system. that is what we are avoiding by social distancing. we can never stop the spread completely, just slow it so we can handle it.

People don't need a 6 ft tape measure. They just need to visualize a dead person laying on the ground.

Went to the grocery store and they were all out of toilet paper. I also had to go to the hardware store, they were all out of 6 foot tape measures.

Communicate. The DZ should have an "S&TA" (Safety & Training Advisor). That would be a place to start. Otherwise the DZO (Drop Zone Owner). Get together and discuss how to minimize risks. Skydivers can seem a bit odd, but believe me - If you approach them wanting to work together to keep everyone safe, they should be willing to work with you. I'm going to bet that your gliders (sailplanes, right?) follow standard traffic patterns, right? So do skydivers under canopy. We have the advantage that we need very little distance to land, so we can land in almost any direction (no need for a lengthy runway). But my DZ lands almost exclusively east or west (parallel to the runway) so our patterns mirror the ones used by the fixed wing craft. I would be surprised if you can't come to an agreement with the jumpers that 'gliders fly their patterns over here, jumpers fly their patterns over there'. Also, do the gliders have radios? Jump pilots are supposed to broadcast over CTAF a 'two minute' call, a 'jumpers away' call and some even do a 'all jumpers on the ground' call. I understand that gliders can only come down (mostly) and once in the pattern are committed to landing (canopies are the same way). If you guys have radios, it would be reasonable to call out 'hold the jumpers, I'm in a bad place and have to fly through the canopy area to make it back'. Obviously, if this happens a lot, something is wrong. But again, skydivers understand this concept. Keep in mind that the jumpers are in free fall for maybe a minute, and under canopy for maybe 5 or so. Depending on the plane used (planes?) you might have only a couple canopies in the air every 40 minutes or so (if they are using one C-182) or up to 20 every 20 minutes (if they use a DH-6 Otter). So, while there is a potential for conflict, it's in a fairly limited time window.

I have experience doing CRW - canopy formation at several multi plane DZs. It may not be exactly the same as your situation but we still have to have a plan and procedures in place to keep everyone safe since our canopy formations are in the air for 10 plus minutes. Here's what we do: establish a "line of death" a land mark that we must stay outside of until a certain altitude before flying back to the landing area, We have the jump runs off set so the other planes aren't dropping people on top of us. The pilots also coordinate with radio so they know where the CRW formation(s) will be. You may be able to alter these to fit your situation. Or at least have a separate side or your air space for jumpers and gliders.