MarkF

Wallace and Grommit rock. I even went so far as to PAY for the tapes...

Kiwi beer has gotta be crap. After all they buy it by the mini-tanker. Quantity does NOT equal quality. It IS better than Fosters though. Hell Bud Light is probably better'n Fosters (the swill of the south). You may well reckon that their footy is better but they got beat in the NRL grand final by an Australian team.... As well he should...

At the moment I don't. I had a considerable run-in with Ross River Virus disease[1] which had me crippled with arthritic knees, ankles, elbows, hands, feet and wrists for about two years followed up by the almost mandatory bout of chronic fatigue syndrome which I'm only just starting to get over. Three years of time out from life because of a single mosquito bite. I got up to the second last AFF jump at Barwon Heads. ie. Only the hop 'n pop left. My current goal is to start over again in January on my birthday when I turn fifty. BIG birthday pressie to myself...

Oi !!! I AM NOT A YANK. I'm a fuckin' Victorian same as you. Wash yer mouth out..

Shhhhhh. We gotta keep it that way otherwise they'll all come here and drink our barely sufficient beer supplies.... Ooroo Mark F...

Good thing they didn't leave it in St. Albans (Western suburb Melb. Oz).... Ferrari's F1 Team has fired its entire Pit Crew The announcement follows Ferrari's decision to take advantage of the Australian Government's "Work For the Dole" Scheme and hire unemployed youths from St Albans. The decision to hire them was brought on by a recent documentary on how unemployed youths in Melbourne's outer suburbs were able to remove a set of car wheels in less than 6 seconds without proper equipment, whereas Ferrari's existing crew takes more than 8 seconds. This was thought to be an excellent yet bold move by Ferrari Management, and, as most races are won & lost in the pits, Ferrari would have an advantage over every other team. However, Ferrari's expectations were exceeded, as during the Crew's first practice session; not only were "da boyz from Snalbans" able to change the tyres in under 6 seconds, but within 12 seconds they had resprayed, re-badged, and sold the vehicle over to the McLaren Team for four dozen VB stubbies and a gram. Ooroo Mark F... Popular folklore would have it that St. Albans is where the car "re-birthing industry" is centred in Melbourne.

I've got all of 'em. As you say, funny as hell. Look into 'em for what they may have been modelled on. Wyrd Systers, for example is McBeth. In some of the earlier books the Patrician is almost certainly based on Lee Kwan Yew of Singapore in the '70's. The line that most sticks in my mind from The Patrician is "I firmly believe in democracy. One man one vote. I am the man and I have the vote." If Leonard of Quirm isn't Leonardo DaVinci I'll eat my modem. If you enjoy Pratchett you'll probably like Robert Rankin too. Equally off the wall with titles such as "Nostradamus Ate My Hamster" and "A Dog Called Demolition" or even "The Dance of the Voodoo Handbag". "The Book of Ultimate Truths" is a scream...

Or 'tart' come (ho-hum) to that... I heard a lengthy discussion about various very old methods of contraception on the radio (ABC in Oz.) today. Allegedly around the time of the Crimean (sp?) women used to use a half lemon skin as a diaphragm. Yesterday I heard a half hour discussion, on the same radio station, about bowels and what, in the minds of doctors, constitutes a good shit. Tomorrow (today actually) I'm going to work with the radio OFF. Ooroo Mark F...

Bloody hell. All I can is say that the people around wherever that happened are a bunch of slack bastards. If it had happened anywhere in Oz. summer or winter, daylight or pitch black the whole mess would be cleaned up in minutes. At least the OK bottles would be anyway. 'Course if it was Fosters, swill of the south, it might take nearly half an hour though... Un-f'kn-believable.... Ooroo Mark F...

If you hate the paycheck that much I'll take it off your hands and deal with it, OK...

Forsyth on the old mans side and Mc Rae on the old ladies side. Apparently Instaurator ruinae means repairer of ruin. Have a couple of tartans. The Forsyth old and new. Ooroo Mark F...

Do NOT see Allegro non Troppo while tripping. It wasn't 'shrooms either it was some good quality acid. There IS such a thing as too much of a good thing...

Much....

The graphic portrayals of the adolescent mind elucidated here should be conclusive enough proof of the Freudian theories. Or. Mutate now - there'll be a queue later. Ooroo Mark F...

Nah it's me that's confused. Where I say plaintiff I mean the "sue-ee" as opposed to the "sue-er". I'll edit the other post. In my defence I've been working on a BIG disaster recover plan for about 3 months and just now I run into the very much dreaded corporate politics. GRRR.... Ooroo Mark F...

They may well have the right to sue. They may well be seeking some form of closure. Whatever. The courtroom is however the wrong place for it. Imagine how much worse off they'll be when they find out that the poor person who died was entirely in the wrong[1]. Imagine how much worse off they'll feel when they find out that they've bankrupted someone without blame and destroyed another life. Imagine how much worse off they'll be when they get all of that persons costs awarded against them[2]. Very (most) often people who charge off to the nearest courtroom and start showering the countryside with writs don't take the time to consider the consequences. Of course this is all helped by the money grubbing lawyers from Grabbit & Run LLB. [1] I know nothing if the incident apart from what I've read on rec dot. Hardly a definitive source. I'm reserving my judgement until the FAA and NTSB reports become available. [2] Dunno how it works there, here if you sue and lose you get to pay the costs of the person you're sueing, ALL of 'em, plus your own. They may well then sue for damage to reputation, business time lost, lost opportunity, punitive damages, costs, etc. Ooroo Mark F...

Having seen the inside of one of those suckers I reckon you'd be able to get 4 decks in there. Of course getting it off the ground with that many people inside would be another issue altogether....

Just goes to show what a bit of pressure on the UN can acheive. Perhaps some more pressure can now be applied to get Israel to conform to the UN resolutions it ignores on a daily basis. Perhaps some countries don't see Israel in the same strategic light. (oil) Ooroo Mark F...

The Richard Grounddiver posts from uk.rec.skydiving are pretty funny too. Find 'em on http://www.skydiveworld.com/english/fun.htm Ooroo Mark F...

Let's see who's running it on the slowest processor

I'm in sunny and windy Essendon just down the road from the North Essendon Village. At least the fucking AFL didn't steal your team. Yep, you guessed it I'm a Fitzroy supporter. And NO I didn't sell out and follow the Brissy mob. The only interest I have in the finals now is in hoping that Collingwood can smash a few interstate skulls. Ooroo Mark F...

It's 10:10 PM here and the bloody Adelaide Crows have just beaten the Melbourne Demons. BASTARDS. Fuck me two MELBOURNE teams beaten this weekend and both by croweaters (South Aussies). At least it gives the Collingwood Magpies a chance to SMASH the Crows next weekend. Ooroo Mark F... Oh and the game is the greatest game there is AFL football and we're well into the final series. http://afl.com.au/

I'm a long, long way away in Melbourne Oz. Around about this time last year I was just finishing a last cup of tea before going to bed when I heard on the radio that a 'plane had hit the WTC. Shit ! I though - some careless idiot has made a real mess of a sight-seeing flight. Y'see I assumed it was a Cessna or something small. Of course I had to go and turn on the TV. I was more than horrified at what I saw. Much more than horrified. And bemused. Why should anyone do such a thing ? I stayed up 'til dawn transfixed by the CNN coverage and went off to work the next day in some sort of trance. Very little work was done by anyone there that day. Right now I'm listening to the radio (it's going out on Radio Aust as well) having a cup of tea but I'm not thinking of going to bed. Rather I'm thinking about how each and every one of us has been affected. Not by the material things like insurance premiums rising to dizzying heights. Not by what has happened to the value of the financial market. Not even about the thousands of deaths - may each and every one of them, rest in peace. I'm thinking of what that single episode has done to the social fabric of mankind. We should all be mourning our loss. My heartfelt sympathy to all who were and are more closely affected than I. Ooroo Mark F...

Sounds to me like you need a bottle of the Queensland Doctor otherwise known as Bundaberg OP or just plain bundy. The OP stands for Over Proof and it's 57.7% alchohol. (Nrrmal bundy is as weak as piss - a mere 37%) You can use the beer you need to buy for your first loss and your first sprained ankle for the beer chasers. Hmmmm bundy 'n beer chasers. I'm off to the grog shop... Ooroo Mark F...