WrongWay 0 #1 October 3, 2003 Okay, this is gonna sound crazy, and I realize I've always been a dreamer, but I'm the kind of guy that believes that there's one person for everyone, and that when you're with that person, you just know that he/she is the one. Too many times have I seen couples come and go, including ones I've been a part of, and all these people seem to stay together simply for the fact that it's convenient. They think that just because they get along alright that they're in love. I've been in love 3 times, and all three times, I felt "the magic", ya know, that feeling you get when you really love someone. When you look at them, you'd do anything just to see them smile, because it literally makes you tremble. When you kiss them, it gives you chills. You know, the magic feeling, love. But it always fades away, and I've seen it go not only in my relationships, but in so many others as well, even when it's clear even for more than a couple years. My question is this: doesn't anyone believe in that anymore? Is every relationship now just a convenience, an extra bonus socially? Does anyone really believe in true love anymore, or am I just a crazy dreamer??? Wrong Way D #27371 Mal Manera Rodriguez Cajun Chicken Ø Hellfish #451 The wiser wolf prevails. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nightingale 0 #2 October 3, 2003 you're a crazy dreamer.... j/k that "magic" you feel at first is infatuation... takes six months to a year to wear off, on average... then, all those little "cute" things the other person does start to drive you nuts. real relationships, true love, and all that, take work. it's not something you just do... getting together is easy. staying together takes conversation, communication, compromise and the confidence that you are capable of working through the rough spots. people fall into a routine and forget to appreciate the other person. Time is a very precious commodity. Yes, I believe in love and romance and all that... but I also look at the realities rather than the fairy tale. Things aren't always going to be perfect, but if BOTH of you work at it enough, things can be perfect for you. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
vonSanta 0 #3 October 3, 2003 A friend once said "I am not a hopeless romantic simply because I believe there's nothing hopeless about being a romantic" Maybe it's true. About relationships: dunno, really. I hope you're right. Never experienced what you talk about myself and I tend not to get involved nowadays, but I've seen some of my friends and family find partners where there's 'magic' or something that seems like it. That ought to be encouraging, at least. Santa Von GrossenArsch I only come in one flavour ohwaitthatcanbemisunderst Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mindcake 0 #4 October 3, 2003 OK.....that magical feeling is your body producing a chemical similar to meth-amphetamine...and just like the synthetic drug your body builds a tolerance quickly (late night Learning Channel)....everyone is different....this partially explains why some people fall in love easily and get hot and heave into a relationship quickly.....then it the feeling goes away and they find another person to "love"....so it really is true some people are addictded to "love"...if by love you mean that warm fuzzy feeling...it's chemical...but thats not to say it isn't a valid feeling...chemistry rules our existence in many ways. True love exists, but it is more of a chance encounter that brings them together. Lasting relationships are ones where after the buzz wears off you still like that person and can grow with them, closer,not apart. This is a rare thing indeed, in the past you stayed together because it was socially un-acceptable to break up...this resuted in a lot of long term relationships but not necessarly happy ones. Today it is acceptable to move from one relationship to another because it "feels right", and the things we as men find attractive have changed....for instance I like strong willed ladies, confident in themselves, little or no make-up....other men look for a woman that will depend on them for everything.....neither is right or wrong...because both are right for the right people....and nowadays the stratifacation between these groups is huge.....it makes it a lot harder to choose when you have thousands of different attitudes (today) as opposed to a narrower view of things that many people had in the past...sorry I am totally running on here (thats what you get when your x is a sociologist...lol) Don´t belive the hype Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PhillyKev 0 #5 October 3, 2003 Quotereal relationships, true love, and all that, take work. it's not something you just do... getting together is easy. staying together takes conversation, communication, compromise and the confidence that you are capable of working through the rough spots. And the point of going through all that work is? I'll take the short term good feelings and when that doesn't exist anymore, I'll take solitude. Life's too short to spend it trying to please someone else. I don't mean doing nice things for someone else, that's its own reward. But I mean having to alter your personality and your self identity in order to force a relationship to last. Yeah, I believe in IT, but I don't believe IT is forever, and I don't think you will only ever find it once. You find IT, you lose IT, you find IT again with someone else. Without IT, I don't see the reason for putting in the effort. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skyesspot 0 #6 October 3, 2003 I do believe there is someone for everyone. I don't believe that just because you find that person that everything is perfect. Quote... "the magic", ya know, that feeling you get when you really love someone. When you look at them, you'd do anything just to see them smile However, THIS should never change!! Maybe waiver once in a while, but should constantly be a driving factor. Too many times people take the easy way out instead of giving the extra effort. Life is too short. Don't sweat the small stuff. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lawrocket 3 #7 October 3, 2003 I now believe in "magic." 6 months ago, I did not, mainly because of the good relationships I had. At 30 years old, I now knwo what "magic" is. She was an old acquaintance, whose name I spotted on a list of thousands of others. I was scrolling down to see whether someone I knew passed the bar, and my eyes, for a split second caught her name. I scrolled back. We became great friends over the next few months, and I found that I truly admired and respected her for all of her accomplishments. "Magic" starts with respect. "Magic" continued with the physical. It was certainly there. "Magic" is where the beautiful grows more beautiful every day. "Magic" continued with the timing. As we discussed whether we would relocate to be together, I found outI was going to be laid off. Thus, something was at work letting me know how right this was. "Magic" moved forward with the difficulties. We've had our problems, and they were troubling. My sweet imperfections became annoying, as did hers. We then realized what our sweet imperfections brought with us. Her annoying imperfections became beautiful. "Magic" is in the transformation. The "magic" moved on to happiness. "Magic" is defined by a series of small things that add up to happiness. "Magic" is wanting to go home to see her after work. "Magic" is the other growing more beautiful every day. "Magic" is realizing that the foundation of the relationship is based not on love or like or lust, but on respect and admiration. "Magic" is the knowledge that she makes me a better man. "Magic" is thepart where a mixture of strange coincidence add up to something grand. Magic is where it gets better each day. Magic is the knowledge that there would be no relief in a breakup, like I have had before. Magic exists, indeed... My wife is hotter than your wife. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
moodyskydiver 0 #8 October 3, 2003 I believe in the magic.I've felt that warm energetic excitement when that special someone touches your hand or caresses your cheek. Being so happy in that one moment that you almost couldn't help but cry because you can't contain your joy. Feeling at peace and safe when you fall asleep with them next to you or just by having their arms around you.Then the devastation of being rejected,unwanted and turned away. Then the heartache that follows when you watch them walk away. Some people like me do believe, but too many have I seen that don't listen to their heart or find love/relationships too inconvenient, impractical or too much work.There are just so many people in the world today who are hurt, jaded, mistrustful, and have given up on that magic. So they deny it, ignore it or turn away when the opportunity is there.Its sad and breaks my heart to see so much unhappiness when it is so unnecessary. "...just an earthbound misfit, I." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
narcimund 0 #9 October 3, 2003 The feeling is great, but the feeling is not the reason for a real committed relationship. If you're just after the druggie high of infatuation, then you're doomed to change out relationships regularly until you can't generate the feeling anymore. Then you spend the next 40 years being a a prematurely old lonely man. Infatuation isn't the REASON for love any more than flavor is the REASON for eating. They're lovely side benefits, but you eat for nutrition and you love for the same reason. Think about that before dumping a great woman because you've stopped quivering around her. (Edited to add: This written as I come up on five years with the same man. He doesn't make me quiver and swoon as much, but I have 10 times the reason to respect and love and believe in him now.) First Class Citizen Twice Over Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Emma 0 #10 October 3, 2003 QuoteAnd the point of going through all that work is? I'll take the short term good feelings and when that doesn't exist anymore, I'll take solitude. Like...you've tried so many times to make things work and it's failed, why waste your time again. Better to be alone even if that isn't ideal. It's easier to minimise happiness and minimise pain in the same degree. Today's world is full of the quick fix, the 'get rich quick', the 'Personality ethic', the 'smile your way to the top' belief. Maybe they have a point? If it hurts why bother to go there? Quote"A true leader is an independent thinker who does what he believes to be best. There are many true leaders without a following, and way too many followers without a true leader." A true leader looks outside the basic paradigms of failure they find in life and always seeks a better way. They try to do what they think is the best - to follow principles. The best path isn't always the easiest. It seems easier to say it's all bollocks because there is so much crap out there and so many false, insincere, scared people, but really, it's up to you to choose whether to be different from that or not. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflygoddess 0 #11 October 3, 2003 So did you feel the magic when you PMed me? I did...or I would have said no. <> <> what is a goddess to do if her god doesn't feel the magic anymore... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bobsled92 0 #12 October 4, 2003 Dear "Moody", I wait the day,... I count the moments,....that you will finally have,...yes, you know. When you have that signature line that finnally says, - "Ready for the Rodeo?,then ...Say my name Bitch" --Love, -Moody_______________________________ If I could be a Super Hero, I chose to be: "GRANT-A-CLAUS". and work 365 days a Year. http://www.hangout.no/speednews/ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chaoskitty 0 #13 October 4, 2003 QuoteSo did you feel the magic when you PMed me? I did...or I would have said no. <> <> what is a goddess to do if her god doesn't feel the magic anymore... wrongway is a PM whore.. theres no "magic" involved. Hes just lucky hes so cute... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wingnut 0 #14 October 4, 2003 i beleive in "the magic" as you put it..... but then again i'm a hopelss romantic...... ______________________________________ "i have no reader's digest version" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
WrongWay 0 #15 October 4, 2003 Quote wrongway is a PM whore.. theres no "magic" involved. I may kid in PMs, but I think you know I'm a much different guy than that. And if I'm so cute, why the hell am I always single??? Wrong Way D #27371 Mal Manera Rodriguez Cajun Chicken Ø Hellfish #451 The wiser wolf prevails. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
flyhi 24 #16 October 4, 2003 QuoteDoes anyone believe in "the magic" anymore?*** I've been to Deland and I believe. And, for the record, I think it is spelled "Majik". Just ask Solly.Shit happens. And it usually happens because of physics. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites WrongWay 0 #17 October 4, 2003 Nah, I prefer Pandemonium. Good luck you guys!!! Wrong Way D #27371 Mal Manera Rodriguez Cajun Chicken Ø Hellfish #451 The wiser wolf prevails. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites loudtom 5 #18 October 4, 2003 I have had a lot of experience at this in the last year and a half, ask anyone at sdc. And what I have learned, even when it sounds right, looks right, smells right, you should be glad you didn't step in it. The good experiences I had with the two relationships last year are now overshadowed by the pain. And I won a bronze at Nationals with one of 'em. I know I am not perfect, but I always tried to be real. And that was hard for us to do in the long run... I am alot jaded now but I am not sure I believe that it can happen anymore. Maybe.. but I ain't sure. I am getting to old to keep trying... But you seem way to young to be in this predicament. Don't give up. Just be sure!!!!tom #90 #54 #08 and now #5 with a Bronze :-) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites chaoskitty 0 #19 October 4, 2003 QuoteQuote wrongway is a PM whore.. theres no "magic" involved. I may kid in PMs, but I think you know I'm a much different guy than that. And if I'm so cute, why the hell am I always single??? Well.. apparently you are NOT always single if youre getting cheated on and dumped. Hell.. I'm cute and I'm single.. I'm just not so worried about it. I'm a lot older than you, too. You just have to relax. I felt "the magic" in what turned out to be my worst relationships, and the best ones didnt have it. Dont rely on it. Feel with your heart and your head. And quit falling for the little skanks who cheat! I dont wanna have to come up there and bust some heads! ps- PM me.. ya whore!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites racer42 0 #20 October 4, 2003 I think the line goes something like " for better or worse, for richer or poorer. in sickness and in health, till death due us part". Been through all of those but the last one. Started that journey 17 years ago.L.A.S.T. #24 Co-Founder Biscuit Brothers Freefly Team Electric Toaster #3 Co-Founder Team Non Sequitor Co-Founder Team Happy Sock Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Chrisky 0 #21 October 4, 2003 I'm a believer! Sadly, this renders me a single most of my time... A relationship will always work, when you love the other one more than you need him and vice versa.The mind is like a parachute - it only works once it's open. From the edge you just see more. ... Not every Swooper hooks & not every Hooker swoops ... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites dove 0 #22 October 4, 2003 QuoteThere are just so many people in the world today who are hurt, jaded, mistrustful, and have given up on that magic. Yup. That's me. I believe in that magic, but I have given up on it as well. I am very selective about who I am with and hesitant to get in relationships at all just out of fear of being hurt. But when I feel that amazing feeling I give in. And every single time I have been devastatingly hurt. The pain is more than I can bear so I'm not gonna even try anymore. Thank God for batteries. Fall in dove. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites jumpergirl 0 #23 October 4, 2003 I totally believe... and I have proof! I felt that magic the moment I met Travis... and I feel it again every time I look into his eyes, when he kisses me, when he puts his arms arounnd me. I definitely believe. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Snowwhite 0 #24 October 4, 2003 I married a guy because it was the sane and logical thing to do, and I am a sane and logical person. He married me because he lusted after me, he said loved me. We had our first baby a couple years later, and were playing on the couch with the baby. My hubby said something to me, and ZING the magic hit. We now have been married 29 years, and if I told you half of the stuff we have been thru, you wouldn't believe it. He now lives in South Carolina, I live in Illinois, taking care of his dad. When we have the chance to be in the same state at the same time ZING there's magic. Yes, there is magic that lasts thru years and years, but it is a lot of hard work, and understanding, and forgiveness. Kinda like ice cream. If you eat it every single meal, it gets cold and boring. If you treat yourself to it every now and again, it's a miracle treat.skydiveTaylorville.org [email protected] Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites skycutie 0 #25 October 4, 2003 I do believe in "the magic" and I don't care what the world thinks and/or says. I believe there's another soul out there for me. I believe in the "'til death do us apart" thing.... I believe! The sad part is that this world has turned so incompetent. Few people care to TRY. We’ve become so selfish!!! But I believe there's something more.... I believe in the unity and compatibility of the souls. I now some day I'll find THAT soul, and we'll live together, 'til death do us apart. Dreamer? Maybe.... But, again, I don't care.... I’d rather be a dreamer. MEN: you can't live with 'em, you can't shoot 'em, but you can act psychotic and keep 'em off balance. 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WrongWay 0 #17 October 4, 2003 Nah, I prefer Pandemonium. Good luck you guys!!! Wrong Way D #27371 Mal Manera Rodriguez Cajun Chicken Ø Hellfish #451 The wiser wolf prevails. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
loudtom 5 #18 October 4, 2003 I have had a lot of experience at this in the last year and a half, ask anyone at sdc. And what I have learned, even when it sounds right, looks right, smells right, you should be glad you didn't step in it. The good experiences I had with the two relationships last year are now overshadowed by the pain. And I won a bronze at Nationals with one of 'em. I know I am not perfect, but I always tried to be real. And that was hard for us to do in the long run... I am alot jaded now but I am not sure I believe that it can happen anymore. Maybe.. but I ain't sure. I am getting to old to keep trying... But you seem way to young to be in this predicament. Don't give up. Just be sure!!!!tom #90 #54 #08 and now #5 with a Bronze :-) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
chaoskitty 0 #19 October 4, 2003 QuoteQuote wrongway is a PM whore.. theres no "magic" involved. I may kid in PMs, but I think you know I'm a much different guy than that. And if I'm so cute, why the hell am I always single??? Well.. apparently you are NOT always single if youre getting cheated on and dumped. Hell.. I'm cute and I'm single.. I'm just not so worried about it. I'm a lot older than you, too. You just have to relax. I felt "the magic" in what turned out to be my worst relationships, and the best ones didnt have it. Dont rely on it. Feel with your heart and your head. And quit falling for the little skanks who cheat! I dont wanna have to come up there and bust some heads! ps- PM me.. ya whore!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
racer42 0 #20 October 4, 2003 I think the line goes something like " for better or worse, for richer or poorer. in sickness and in health, till death due us part". Been through all of those but the last one. Started that journey 17 years ago.L.A.S.T. #24 Co-Founder Biscuit Brothers Freefly Team Electric Toaster #3 Co-Founder Team Non Sequitor Co-Founder Team Happy Sock Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Chrisky 0 #21 October 4, 2003 I'm a believer! Sadly, this renders me a single most of my time... A relationship will always work, when you love the other one more than you need him and vice versa.The mind is like a parachute - it only works once it's open. From the edge you just see more. ... Not every Swooper hooks & not every Hooker swoops ... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dove 0 #22 October 4, 2003 QuoteThere are just so many people in the world today who are hurt, jaded, mistrustful, and have given up on that magic. Yup. That's me. I believe in that magic, but I have given up on it as well. I am very selective about who I am with and hesitant to get in relationships at all just out of fear of being hurt. But when I feel that amazing feeling I give in. And every single time I have been devastatingly hurt. The pain is more than I can bear so I'm not gonna even try anymore. Thank God for batteries. Fall in dove. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jumpergirl 0 #23 October 4, 2003 I totally believe... and I have proof! I felt that magic the moment I met Travis... and I feel it again every time I look into his eyes, when he kisses me, when he puts his arms arounnd me. I definitely believe. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Snowwhite 0 #24 October 4, 2003 I married a guy because it was the sane and logical thing to do, and I am a sane and logical person. He married me because he lusted after me, he said loved me. We had our first baby a couple years later, and were playing on the couch with the baby. My hubby said something to me, and ZING the magic hit. We now have been married 29 years, and if I told you half of the stuff we have been thru, you wouldn't believe it. He now lives in South Carolina, I live in Illinois, taking care of his dad. When we have the chance to be in the same state at the same time ZING there's magic. Yes, there is magic that lasts thru years and years, but it is a lot of hard work, and understanding, and forgiveness. Kinda like ice cream. If you eat it every single meal, it gets cold and boring. If you treat yourself to it every now and again, it's a miracle treat.skydiveTaylorville.org [email protected] Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites skycutie 0 #25 October 4, 2003 I do believe in "the magic" and I don't care what the world thinks and/or says. I believe there's another soul out there for me. I believe in the "'til death do us apart" thing.... I believe! The sad part is that this world has turned so incompetent. Few people care to TRY. We’ve become so selfish!!! But I believe there's something more.... I believe in the unity and compatibility of the souls. I now some day I'll find THAT soul, and we'll live together, 'til death do us apart. Dreamer? Maybe.... But, again, I don't care.... I’d rather be a dreamer. MEN: you can't live with 'em, you can't shoot 'em, but you can act psychotic and keep 'em off balance. HISPA #10 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Prev 1 2 Next Page 1 of 2 Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Reply to this topic... × Pasted as rich text. Paste as plain text instead Only 75 emoji are allowed. × Your link has been automatically embedded. Display as a link instead × Your previous content has been restored. Clear editor × You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL. Insert image from URL × Desktop Tablet Phone Submit Reply 0
Snowwhite 0 #24 October 4, 2003 I married a guy because it was the sane and logical thing to do, and I am a sane and logical person. He married me because he lusted after me, he said loved me. We had our first baby a couple years later, and were playing on the couch with the baby. My hubby said something to me, and ZING the magic hit. We now have been married 29 years, and if I told you half of the stuff we have been thru, you wouldn't believe it. He now lives in South Carolina, I live in Illinois, taking care of his dad. When we have the chance to be in the same state at the same time ZING there's magic. Yes, there is magic that lasts thru years and years, but it is a lot of hard work, and understanding, and forgiveness. Kinda like ice cream. If you eat it every single meal, it gets cold and boring. If you treat yourself to it every now and again, it's a miracle treat.skydiveTaylorville.org [email protected] Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skycutie 0 #25 October 4, 2003 I do believe in "the magic" and I don't care what the world thinks and/or says. I believe there's another soul out there for me. I believe in the "'til death do us apart" thing.... I believe! The sad part is that this world has turned so incompetent. Few people care to TRY. We’ve become so selfish!!! But I believe there's something more.... I believe in the unity and compatibility of the souls. I now some day I'll find THAT soul, and we'll live together, 'til death do us apart. Dreamer? Maybe.... But, again, I don't care.... I’d rather be a dreamer. MEN: you can't live with 'em, you can't shoot 'em, but you can act psychotic and keep 'em off balance. HISPA #10 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
