List 'o Funny Pick-up Lines

[DrunkMonkey 0]

I'll start:

"Hi! My Name is . I have a six-inch tongue, and I can breathe thru my ears. What's your name?"

What are other good ones you've heard/used?

[indyz 1]

Hey, do you know how much a polar bear weighs?
No.
Enough to break the ice. My name is . . .

[DTOXX 0]

Nice shoes, wanna @$%^ ?

-------
D.T. Holder
SIMstudy

[kelel01 1]

That one sure as hell works on me.

I know a lot, but we've all heard them a million times . . . But I guess my favorite (already posted it once) is:

"Wanna go back to my place, drink margaritas and fuck?" Followed by . . . *SMACK* "What?? You don't like margaritas?"

Kelly

[Brains 2]

Quote

What are other good ones you've heard/used?

Where was the first one??

"Hi, my name is Jeff" Has worked once or twice for me

Of course there was this one chick in Eloy that i just walked up behind and kissed her on the back of her neck. She damn near attacked me right there in the packing hangar.

Never look down on someone, unless they are going down on you.

[BoostedXT 0]

I like...

"This drink is on me, maybe later I can get on you."

Personally...."Hello" has worked good for me.

Joe

For long as you live and high you fly and smiles you'll give and tears you'll cry and all that you touch and all that you see is all your life will ever be.
Pedro Offers you his Protection.

[lawrocket 3]

If I could re-arrange the alphabet I'd put "U" and "I" together.

My wife is hotter than your wife.

[happythoughts 0]

I always introduce "my shy friend" to their group. Just helping out.

I always try to make them feel intrigued by my challenging nature. Arm-wrestling competitions are good.

[Rdy2skydive 0]

I've heard some good ones but these were my favorites:

STRANGER: Excuse me, do you have the time?
ME: Yes, it's 7:45.
STRANGER: No, I meant, do you have the time to meet for a drink later?

OR:

STRANGER (using his best Andrew Dyce Clay voice): Hey you - you kinda cute. Whas you name?
ME: Excuse me?
STRANGER: I said, I tink you cute - wanna go out or what?

It was a tough decision but I said no.

[seekfun 0]

Brian,

I take it you're a fellow reader of The Onion?

Rock on Milwaukee,

topher

"...there is a there out there..." - Tom Robbins

[wmw999 2,130]

Here are a couple of threads from the Women's forum on the same topic:

Best and worst threads.

Note that the "worst" thread is a lot longer

Wendy W.

There is nothing more dangerous than breaking a basic safety rule and getting away with it. It removes fear of the consequences and builds false confidence. (tbrown)

[bch7773 0]

do you believe in love at first sight, or do i have to walk by again?

Can i buy you a drink, or would you just like the money instead?

Are you from Nashville? Because you're the only "Ten-i-see" (tennessee)

MB 3528, RB 1182

[fatmarl 0]

A bit off topic here but how did you manage to do half a jump?

[Nightingale 0]

its been explained in other threads. A reserve ride.

[Clownburner 0]

My favorite one would have to be:

"Hi. My friends over there at that table want to know if you think I'm cute."

7CP#1 | BTR#2 | Payaso en fuego Rodriguez
"I want hot chicks in my boobies!"- McBeth

[Clownburner 0]

Quote

its been explained in other threads. A reserve ride.

Wouldn't that count as 2 skydives, instead of just .5? After all, you do get two separate freefalls...

7CP#1 | BTR#2 | Payaso en fuego Rodriguez
"I want hot chicks in my boobies!"- McBeth

[gulaz 1]

Quote

do you believe in love at first sight, or do i have to walk by again?

Can i buy you a drink, or would you just like the money instead?

Are you from Nashville? Because you're the only "Ten-i-see" (tennessee)

... Mike's Hard Lemonade

[Thanatos340 1]

Can I flirt with you?

Excuse me, does this tequila taste funny? (Hand them an untouched shot)

Well, here I am. What were your other two wishes?

Have you ever played leap frog naked ??

I can play the 1812 Overture on a touchtone phone with my tongue.

Can you lick your nipples? [No.] Can I?

And the all time Best/Worst Pick up Line......
You must have a Keg hidden in your pants, cause I would love to Tap dat Ass!!

[mattsplat 0]

You know the more you drink the better I look.

[diablopilot 2]

Quote

Nice shoes, wanna @$%^ ?

My favorite.

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You're not as good as you think you are. Seriously.

[gremlin 0]

Walk up to girl
"I'll bet you $5 I can make you tits move without touching them"

When she accepts fondle both breasts with your hands.

"Guess I lost the bet" and offer her the $5.

Never tried it myself ... obviously...

I'm drunk, you're drunk, lets go back to mine....

[kelel01 1]

Here's my favorite:

"Damn! You's a fine mother fucker . . . lemme pull up to that bumper and smack that monkey!"

Kelly

[Girlfalldown 0]

My favorite:

"I'm going outside to make out. Wanna come?"

--------------

(Do not, I repeat DO NOT, take my posts seriously.)

[Viking 0]

Quote

Here's my favorite:

"Damn! You's a fine mother fucker . . . lemme pull up to that bumper and smack that monkey!"

Kelly

LOL

I swear you must have footprints on the back of your helmet - chicagoskydiver
My God has a bigger dick than your god -George Carlin

[BigM 2]

OK... here's a world champion!

Me: Want to get married?
Stranger: No
Me: Well if you don't want to get married, do you want to shack up?
Stranger: No.
Me: Well if you don't want to shack up, do you want to fool around?
Stranger: No.
Me: Well if you don't want to fool around, do you mind sitting still while I do?


It's always good for a laugh!
Blue 111-
Jeff

"When I die, I want to go like my grandmother, who died peacefully in her sleep. Not screaming like all the passengers in her car."