Whiskeyboi 0 #1 May 28, 2008 Okay...there's a freakin' baby boom going on where I work. Number nine just anounced she's "with child". So naturally, this starts the questions for us poor single folk - "Hey, why don't YOU have kids?" (I KNOW it's worse for the women...plus, I'm only 32, people. Hell - Tony Randall did it at 77.) So, for those of you who are as sick of being asked that as I am, what is your smart-ass response for those who ask you? My best is the one I told to my boss... "There's not a woman blind enough, drunk enough, dumb enough, or dead enough..." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nightingale 0 #2 May 28, 2008 Why do you have kids? It usually gets them on a tangent about how great their kids are, and you never have to answer their question. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lippy 787 #3 May 28, 2008 I usually say (and truly beleive) that I can barely take care of myself let alone a frick'n babyI got nuthin Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Whiskeyboi 0 #4 May 28, 2008 QuoteWhy do you have kids? It usually gets them on a tangent about how great their kids are, and you never have to answer their question. True...except by then I'm so annoyed, I really don't give a rat's ass or want to listen about how little Johnnie can flush all by himself. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mnealtx 0 #5 May 28, 2008 *pointing at crotch* "Sorry...wrong plumbing!"Mike I love you, Shannon and Jim. POPS 9708 , SCR 14706 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
eeneR 1 #6 May 28, 2008 There are enough damn kids in broken homes I have no desire what-so-ever to bring anymore kids into this dysfunctional world.She is not a "Dumb Blonde" - She is a "Light-Haired Detour Off The Information Superhighway." eeneR TF#72, FB#4130, Incauto Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Broke 0 #7 May 28, 2008 Because they are just so tasty with the proper seasioningsDivot your source for all things Hillbilly. Anvil Brother 84 SCR 14192 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
banesanura 1 #8 May 28, 2008 If I was a guy: I would say my dick is too big to fit in a girl who has never been pregnant. The only way I can have kids is after she's given birth- then its loose enough for me to slide in. Then wink. Best Girl Scout Ever. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
repcool 2 #9 May 28, 2008 I don't want to share my toys.... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
eeneR 1 #10 May 28, 2008 Quote I don't want to share my toys.... I like that answer She is not a "Dumb Blonde" - She is a "Light-Haired Detour Off The Information Superhighway." eeneR TF#72, FB#4130, Incauto Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryoder 1,410 #11 May 28, 2008 From a former co-worker: "No, we have no kids, but my wife and I compensate by for this by remaining as childish as possible.""There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Shell666 0 #12 May 28, 2008 I tell it like it is. I don't want any. Period. If they persist and say "but why???", I say it's really none of their business and walk away.'Shell Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
popsjumper 2 #13 May 28, 2008 "Because I've seen yours."My reality and yours are quite different. I think we're all Bozos on this bus. Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
guppie01 0 #14 May 28, 2008 I don't have to say anything.... my Grandmother is dead set in believing that I'm infirtile and she takes it upon herself to inform everyone. g "Let's do something romantic this Saturday... how bout we bust out the restraints?" Raddest Ho this side of Jersey #1 - MISS YOU OMG, is she okay? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
squirrel 0 #15 May 28, 2008 Because I am not at the point yet to raise kids like my parents raised me...at least one parent at home...ALL the time, (yeah ALL the time)and they had time for the kids, i was never raised by someone else, some "nanny"...i was raise by MY parents...not a video game or a TV (it was not allowed on until 7:30 PM, and bedtime was 8:30!). when i got home from school, my mom was there...not some babysitter. and, because if i had kids now, i would feel just a bit like most of the people that have kids today...breeders....no intelligence, no education, no experience, just looking to satisfy some selfish urge to entertain themselves because they cant stand to be alone, with no cell phone, no email, no texting. i really wish they would put birth control in the city drinking water, and you simply had to go to the post office to get the antidote, that would eliminate about 37% of the idiot parents right off the top. (rant over) ________________________________ Where is Darwin when you need him? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Shell666 0 #16 May 28, 2008 Quote "Because I've seen yours." LOVE it! 'Shell Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
squirrel 0 #17 May 28, 2008 hey shell666, did you get that boxer? (sorry about the hijack) ________________________________ Where is Darwin when you need him? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
yamtx73 0 #18 May 28, 2008 QuoteOkay...there's a freakin' baby boom going on where I work. Number nine just anounced she's "with child". So naturally, this starts the questions for us poor single folk - "Hey, why don't YOU have kids?" (I KNOW it's worse for the women...plus, I'm only 32, people. Hell - Tony Randall did it at 77.) So, for those of you who are as sick of being asked that as I am, what is your smart-ass response for those who ask you? My best is the one I told to my boss... "There's not a woman blind enough, drunk enough, dumb enough, or dead enough..." Well, considering I'm 50 and don't have kids and have heard this quite a few times I've come up with the standard response..... My ex was spayed before I met her.....The only naturals in this sport shit thru feathers... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rookie120 0 #19 May 28, 2008 Because we dont want any at this time. We don't have the time at this point of our lives and careers to throw a baby into the mix. Someday yes we would like to have one, just not now. I happily send out that check for her BC with no complaints. SO much cheaper than a kid.If you find yourself in a fair fight, your tactics suck! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Shell666 0 #20 May 28, 2008 Quote hey shell666, did you get that boxer? (sorry about the hijack) And sorry about the hijack of the hijack ... YES, I did! Got the good to go last week! I go to pick her up (with MajorDad in tow - thanks Phil!) on June 14th!!! Oh ... wait. Not such a hijack after all. I'm a MOM!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! So yes, I have kids. Why don't you??? 'Shell Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mnealtx 0 #21 May 28, 2008 Quote So yes, I have kids. Why don't you??? While we all think of them as part of the family, I don't think that 'furkids' count in that regard...Mike I love you, Shannon and Jim. POPS 9708 , SCR 14706 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Shell666 0 #22 May 28, 2008 Quote Quote So yes, I have kids. Why don't you??? While we all think of them as part of the family, I don't think that 'furkids' count in that regard... Even if they look just like me??? 'Shell Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
rynodigsmusic 0 #23 May 28, 2008 Quote Okay...there's a freakin' baby boom going on where I work. Number nine just anounced she's "with child". So naturally, this starts the questions for us poor single folk - "Hey, why don't YOU have kids?" (I KNOW it's worse for the women...plus, I'm only 32, people. Hell - Tony Randall did it at 77.) So, for those of you who are as sick of being asked that as I am, what is your smart-ass response for those who ask you? My best is the one I told to my boss... "There's not a woman blind enough, drunk enough, dumb enough, or dead enough..." I dunno, fear I guess. That and the fact that you kinda need a woman for that. I think Ive always been afraid of commitment. My brother gave me a little puppy for Christmas a couple of years ago, he spent a fortune on it...I sold it to a freind about 3 mos later. The truth sucks sometimes."We didn't start the fire" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
downwardspiral 0 #24 May 28, 2008 Quote If I was a guy: I would say my dick is too big to fit in a girl who has never been pregnant. The only way I can have kids is after she's given birth- then its loose enough for me to slide in. Then wink. You really are a sick puppy. If we're going to go there I prefer simple..... "Because she swallows." Then wink and give em that shit eating grin to top it off. www.FourWheelerHB.com Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JohnMitchell 14 #25 May 28, 2008 Quote I tell it like it is. I don't want any. Period. If they persist and say "but why???", I say it's really none of their business and walk away. Best answer, right there. It's no secret that we have 4 kids, but we would never ask someone why they didn't have any. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
