Kennedy 0 #26 February 23, 2004 QuoteThat's when it's time to run away. for him or her? witty subliminal message Guard your honor, let your reputation fall where it will, and outlast the bastards. 1* Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
IMGR2 0 #27 February 23, 2004 WHO CARES! But for reals. I was with a woman once. And she told me she just had the big "O". The only reason she told me was because she had never had one before from actual penetration, only from foreplay. Funny thing was I could see no difference from when she used to fake it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
VanillaSkyGirl 6 #28 February 23, 2004 QuoteI was told in no uncertain terms that women as a rule fake it almost EVERYTIME? Say it ain't so! I have never faked it. That is horrible. Either I am very easy to please (lol..yeah right!) or I have been with men that love to please me first and foremost. I feel pretty lucky right now. Btw, I think that you can tell what a woman likes based on the way that her moans sound (should be unforced...involuntary), involuntary hip/pelvic jerking is another hint, so on and so on. Just pay attention to her body's responses and talk about things before or after if you are unsure. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
VanillaSkyGirl 6 #29 February 23, 2004 QuoteHere is what sucks. The girl wants to sleep and I am left there NOT FINISHED but she has had her fun so what do you do Well, next time finish thinking about baseball already and orgasm along with her! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
flyangel2 2 #30 February 23, 2004 QuoteQuoteThat's when it's time to run away. for him or her? I'm not a man, but if I was with a woman that was acting strange, I'd run away.May your trails be crooked, winding, lonesome, dangerous, leading to the most amazing view. May your mountains rise into and above the clouds. - Edward Abbey Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 212 #31 February 23, 2004 I um, hate to say this, she was letting out ALL the secrets, she says that it is commonplace to say that, no matter what. That guys just NEED thier ego stroked(no pun intended[Well maybe a little]). I would rather be given a vocal map and directions on how to get there from here or at least a "Baby I don't think I can tonight". Gheeze. Ego, Shmeego - give me the truth.I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Misslmperfect 0 #32 February 23, 2004 i agree. i dont know too many women who orgasm EVERY single time they have sex. i envy those who can though lmao. id never fake it, and my husband knows that just because i may not get there that night, it doesnt mean i didnt enjoy it! and it has nothing to do with his 'performance'! that poses another question that may have kind of been answered already: do men really feel defeated and/or inadequate if their partner doesnt have an orgasm?Oh Canada, merci pour la livraison! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
WrongWay 0 #33 February 23, 2004 QuoteFaking it is like lying. A woman who lies more probably fakes it more. . I agree. Personally, I'd rather know that I didn't get her off, rather than be think I did but didn't. Wrong Way D #27371 Mal Manera Rodriguez Cajun Chicken Ø Hellfish #451 The wiser wolf prevails. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
caress 0 #34 February 23, 2004 Oh Turtlespeed! Do you honestly believe that? It is not taught. Atleast my mamma did not ever pull me aside and say to me "Suzanne be dishonest to men during sex!" Intimacy is the most honest moments about yourself. That is why you shouldn't do it with just anyone. It is meant for two people who are ready to be completely open and honest with one another right down to the nitty gritty so to speak(sometimes more than 2 people for our DZ.Commers into that) Look Turtlespeed, I'm not saying that there isn't women out there like that, cause I'm sure there is, I'm just not one of those kind of ladies. I'm pretty blunt and open about things. I've learned.... That being kind is more important than being right. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
benny 0 #35 February 23, 2004 QuoteHere is what sucks. The girl wants to sleep and I am left there NOT FINISHED but she has had her fun so what do you do My first "serious" girlfriend, from my freshman and sophomore years of college... I had always heard how the man finished first and the girl was unsatisfied... I felt like the woman in the relationship. It hardly took anything and she was through, she'd get tremendously sensitive afterwards (everything "tickled" her) and I was just like, "what the hell?" I'm nowhere near done. But at the same time I've been with a girl who I tried every trick in the book on and I couldn't get it. I think most times whether they can get it or not is more psychological than technique related. Never go to a DZ strip show. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gmanpilot 0 #36 February 23, 2004 Quotedo men really feel defeated and/or inadequate if their partner doesnt have an orgasm? Kind of, yes._________________________________________ -There's always free cheese in a mouse trap. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gmanpilot 0 #37 February 23, 2004 QuoteIf she wants to cuddle afterwards, she prolly faked. If she just wants to be left alone for her body to chill out and return to normal, then you did a good job. Now that's good data, thanks._________________________________________ -There's always free cheese in a mouse trap. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wmw999 2,146 #38 February 23, 2004 That varies from person to person. It might be untrue for someone else. Really. Wendy W.There is nothing more dangerous than breaking a basic safety rule and getting away with it. It removes fear of the consequences and builds false confidence. (tbrown) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skyyhi 0 #39 February 23, 2004 I have NEVER faked it. NEVER. . . If the guy I am with needs "assistance" I will gladly offer that. I also like to take charge of my own "O". Guys take charge of their own. . .we women should be as accommodating. Why bother to lie or "fake it". There is no enjoyment in that. . .________________________________________ Take risks not to escape life… but to prevent life from escaping. ~ A bumper sticker at the DZ FGF #6 Darcy Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gmanpilot 0 #40 February 23, 2004 QuoteThat being said , there were times with my ex that I pulled a Meg Ryan because I just wanted it to end and he wouldn't until he thought I Had... What's the point in that? What about "It's not going to happen tonight hon, go for what you know" or something similar. There is something kind of cool and selfless about when a woman is not going to be able to get there, and still being able to voyeuristically enjoy the guy doing his thing. That's when you "owe her one"._________________________________________ -There's always free cheese in a mouse trap. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
misskriss 0 #41 February 23, 2004 I am all for that... believe me. I am all for watching and enjoying that completely, etc. .. I should have clarified. It was toward the end of our marriage so there were many problems and I was still clinging to anything. I had sex with him when I shouldn't have and because there was no emotion left in it I just faked it to end it. I didn't feel like going through the drama of.."well why didn't you..." etc. which is what would of happened. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Darius11 12 #42 February 23, 2004 QuoteQuoteHere is what sucks. The girl wants to sleep and I am left there NOT FINISHED but she has had her fun so what do you do Well, next time finish thinking about baseball already and orgasm along with her! LOL you know that is the best. But I hate the surprise orgasm you girls do once in a wile. You know the one that comes with no warning all of a sudden it is done over and I am there making this face . I can't be mad but I am not happy either LOL. Benny bro I know how it feels man. I think I have been the girl in that way in every relationship I have been. I need a woman that can keep up.I'd rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I am not." - Kurt Cobain Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
karenmeal 0 #43 February 23, 2004 I don't get the faking thing either. I guess some women just don't think its proper to shout out instructions. I'm like a drill sergeant during sex.. works for me. "Life is a temporary victory over the causes which induce death." - Sylvester Graham Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
peacefuljeffrey 0 #44 February 23, 2004 QuoteI had a long conversation with someone the other night. I was told in no uncertain terms that women as a rule fake it almost EVERYTIME? That it is actually unusual that the job is "done correctly" Also that the practice of faking is "Taught" I am in a deep state of depression because of this. Say it ain't so! Posting without having read responses yet: It's my feeling that if a woman has to fake orgasms then she and her man are not relating right. If two people are having sex, it should be a prerequisite that they each care enough about the other to a) be honest with each other (and that means being frank about whether one is touching the other the "right" way") b) be unafraid of the response c) be willing to adapt to the inherent request when the first person says that the stimulation is not working for them I tend to think that I have a good touch (been told so) and am sensitive and gentle when it's desired, and forceful and gruff when it's desired (though my preference is to be sensitive and gentle and flowing and smooth). Usually I have no problem giving pleasure through touch and kissing and all else. Every partner is different, though -- although a lot of what we all like and enjoy as humans is similar. If a woman is not enjoying what I am doing, I like it if she guides me to do what she would like. There's no way I would object to taking dictation, when the end result of complying with it is getting her to ecstasy! I'm not gonna be hurt if she tells me that things I did to other women that lit them on fire simply don't work for her -- she's not the same person as they are! She has different likes and dislikes! Communication is key. You can do it with body language, with spoken language, or by taking the person's hands (or other parts) and guiding them to where they should be, and doing what they should be doing. Hey, you're naked there with the person -- what is there to be embarassed or shy or reticent about? It should be about getting closer, and having a great time being intimate! It can be FUN to learn about someone's body ("can?" -- "SHOULD!"). Both people need to just shed their inhibitions and barriers and shyness and just BE there together, in the moment, sharing and enjoying the whole experience, unrushed and without expectations. That's the key: just be there to enjoy whatever happens, for as long as it goes on, without shooting for some goal. Whatever crosses your mind that might be fun -- do that! Faking orgasms is stupid because it robs the faker and the fakee. It's about inhibition and dishonesty and a misguided attempt to protect someone's feelings. If you accept the reality that a given person's technique is not necessarily "wrong," just not the right thing for a given recipient, you can accept the idea of having to tell/be told that "this isn't gonna get me off -- try this instead." Plus, every person should know for him or herself what gets them off personally. The next step is perhaps SHOWING the partner how to do it! From there, the partner knows what to do and pleasure can continue.-Jeffrey "With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 212 #45 February 23, 2004 OK - tell me this then - I agree that it is not specifically taught - and I agree that not ALL women do this - BUT - is it not true that women use thier sexuality to further themselves? Who teaches that ? Take "The Intern" for example. The producers knew what was going to happen if they structured the show that way. that was thier strategy. Everyone wants to win and noone wants the other to feel bad.I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RevJim 0 #46 February 23, 2004 QuoteQuoteIf she wants to cuddle afterwards, she prolly faked. If she just wants to be left alone for her body to chill out and return to normal, then you did a good job. Now that's good data, thanks. If the lady in question grabs a phone right away afterward, and uses it, listen in. I got a call not so long ago from a certain lady that just haaaad to call and tell me she just got laid, and it was goooood. It's your life, live it! Karma RB#684 "Corcho", ASK#60, Muff#3520, NCB#398, NHDZ#4, C-33989, DG#1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sunshine 2 #47 February 23, 2004 QuoteIf the lady in question grabs a phone right away afterward, and uses it, listen in. I got a call not so long ago from a certain lady that just haaaad to call and tell me she just got laid, and it was goooood. Now who would do such a thing?! ___________________________________________ meow I get a Mike hug! I get a Mike hug! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RevJim 0 #48 February 23, 2004 QuoteQuoteIf the lady in question grabs a phone right away afterward, and uses it, listen in. I got a call not so long ago from a certain lady that just haaaad to call and tell me she just got laid, and it was goooood. Now who would do such a thing?! Oh, gee, I don't know, but I heard she's really bright especially in the mornings when she likes to sing..... It's your life, live it! Karma RB#684 "Corcho", ASK#60, Muff#3520, NCB#398, NHDZ#4, C-33989, DG#1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
caress 0 #49 February 23, 2004 I have not seen the intern Turtlespeed, are you saying that women use their sexuality to get ahead in life? Lord knows that there are women on the planet that do so, yes. Faking an orgasm is like being a liar.-Caress I've learned.... That being kind is more important than being right. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AggieDave 6 #50 February 23, 2004 There are signs to see if its a real orgasm or not. Besides feeling it, you've got the nippls, breathing, skin color (orgasm "flush" on the chest, face). Although, some women don't display all the signs, they usually display atleast a couple.--"When I die, may I be surrounded by scattered chrome and burning gasoline." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
