riddler 0 #1 December 19, 2005 Much of Colorado is a semi-arid desert. Ask anyone who's lived in the Denver basin - it's friggin' dry here. You build up static voltage, you shock yourself. You live here more than 30 years like me, you get used to it. In the winter, it's really bad. The humidity drops to single digits. Your skin turns to sandpaper. You wake up in the middle of the night dreaming about being stranded in a cold desert. You keep water on your nightstand. You can't use a humidifier, because you're cranking up the heater, and all it does is evaporate the moisture in the air instead of keeping you warm. So it gets really dry, and you build up a lot more potential voltage. Now you can see blue sparks when you turn on the lightswitch from your finger to the faceplate screw. You wear wool socks and thermal underwear to keep warm. You might as well dress in a funny suit and call yourself the Human Dynamo. You feel the buzz of electricity every time you walk. Before you kiss your sweetheart, you first ground yourself to them by touching your nose on their cheek. Sure it's painful, but going right for the lips is downright dangerous and could mean the end of your relationship. Or your life. Now there's a fear of turning on the lights. You reach for the light and stop, finger inches from that metal screw of death, hovering on the brink of the 50,000 volt zap that you're pretty sure almost stopped your heart last time. It still hurts to think about it. I know from my electric power classes in college that the conductive path from the left hand to the right foot has a nerve that goes right by the heart - I should touch this with my right hand. Maybe I can touch the plastic cover kinda close to the screw and "ease into it." ZAP. Fuck! That didn't work. Turn on the light quick and hold onto something because you're so dizzy you can barely stand. Everything looks blue for a few seconds. This must be what it's like getting hit by a small lightenting bolt. I remember the grounding strap I wore on my wrist every day I was in the secure lab building rockets at Lockheed Martin. The electronics were sensitive, and you didn't pull out a circuit board unless you were properly grounded to it. I still have some old buddies there. I'm sure they could steal a spare wrist strap for me. I'm sure they're all using them in their houses. Heck, they probably have their kids wearing them. All my electronic devices are pissed off at me too. Four laptops, two cell phones, iPod, house phones. Even the stove. I zap them all several times a day. Every time I get back to the computer, I wonder if it's going to survive that nasty shock I just gave it. Did I kill the disk drive? CPU? Memory? Trucks that drive on the highway drag a grounding chain - I see them sparking on the road at night. Maybe they have a small one I can wear on my ankle? Would it work on carpet?Trapped on the surface of a sphere. XKCD Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RhondaLea 4 #2 December 19, 2005 Fabric softener, moisturizer and conditioner. Every day. If you were a girl, you would know these things. rlIf you don't know where you're going, you should know where you came from. Gullah Proverb Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Remster 27 #3 December 19, 2005 I hear you... I now have to ground myself before kissing Karen, otherwhise, we both get zapped on the lips, and that aint fun. (insert your witty TEMS joke here )...Remster Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LisaM 0 #4 December 19, 2005 This morning I leaned around my cube wall to say something to someone and I zapped my boob!!!! OUCHIE!!! ~ Lisa ~ Do you Rigminder? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jumper03 0 #5 December 19, 2005 Quote(insert your witty TEMS joke here )... Transmission Electron Microscopy joke??? don't get it.Scars remind us that the past is real Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
simplyputsi 0 #6 December 19, 2005 Dude, that is some funny crap. I'm sorry but it just is. Reminds me of the feeling I get everytime I get out of my car and go to shut the door. I've learned to shut the door with my shoe. Ha ha!!!!!! If I knew I was gonna shock somebody when I touched them it would be sooooooooo much fun. I'm evil like that.Skymama's #2 stalker - Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Icon134 0 #7 December 19, 2005 Ohio is the same way in the winter... I think I Killed a 1 Gig jump drive type memory stick about a month ago due to my static buildup... ScottLivin' on the Edge... sleeping with my rigger's wife... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BillyVance 34 #8 December 19, 2005 QuoteDude, that is some funny crap. I'm sorry but it just is. Reminds me of the feeling I get everytime I get out of my car and go to shut the door. I've learned to shut the door with my shoe. Ha ha!!!!!! I've had the same damn problem lately... I kept forgetting that I've built up a charge and ZAP! BLEEPBLEEPit you BLEEPING car! Finally I started using my shoes... "Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
headoverheels 329 #9 December 19, 2005 If you think you are going to get zapped by a doorknob, etc, pull your door key out of your pocket and discharge through that. The large area of metal to skin will spread out the current, and you will not feel the zap, as it arcs from the key tip to the metal object. I wouldn't do this to a car key with embedded electronics. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jlmiracle 7 #10 December 19, 2005 I have this problem alot in the winter- even here in humid Tennessee. But it only seems to be me. At work I hate even getting close to a filing cabinet because of the shock. The people I work with get upset cause I prefer to discharge on them instead of something metal (it seems to be less painful). I'm just warn smooth out at the end of the day because of the all static shocks. I kissed my husband good bye last winter and knocked us both down. Hurt like hell. Now in the winter we just wave.j jBe kinder than necessary because everyone you meet is fighting some kind of battle. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
billvon 2,772 #11 December 19, 2005 >Transmission Electron Microscopy joke??? Transcutaneous Electrical Neural Stimulation, IIRC. Often used by chiropractors for stimulation of muscles. Since adapted for use during sex (and other deviant practices.) Remi misspelled it because he knows nothing of such things. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Remster 27 #12 December 19, 2005 QuoteRemi misspelled it Why do they put the n and m keys so close on keyboards? Remster Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Icon134 0 #13 December 19, 2005 I believe keyboards are designed to make typing more difficult and slower... from back in the day when typewriters were mechanical and if entry was too fast they would tend to hang up... Scott but that's off topic... Static electricticity sucks..Livin' on the Edge... sleeping with my rigger's wife... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
riddler 0 #14 December 19, 2005 Quote This morning I leaned around my cube wall to say something to someone and I zapped my boob!!!! I'll bet it went right through the nipple too. Damn blue stuff seems to know the most painful place to create a circuit and go right for it. I swear when I use my fingers it always hits me right underneath the fingernail Like a few of you said, I use my foot to shut the car door too. If I have a heavy jacket, I'll use my elbow and get the jacket dirty. I may even use my hip. You'd think that car manufacturers would figure out a way to keep the car, you and the ground all at the same potential. Companies spend more time figuring out how to make new flavors of toothpaste - you would think a lot of industries would figure out how to stop static shock. It's even caused gas pumps to explode when people sparked the fuel vapors. I have this theory that the pain or electricity of the shock interferes with short term memory, and we usually forget that it even happened 30 seconds later. For this reason, I think we'll never see any technology put into improving this one small annoying factor of our lives.Trapped on the surface of a sphere. XKCD Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LisaM 0 #15 December 19, 2005 Quote I'll bet it went right through the nipple too. Yes, yes it did! ~ Lisa ~ Do you Rigminder? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Shotgun 1 #16 December 19, 2005 QuoteTranscutaneous Electrical Neural Stimulation, IIRC. Often used by chiropractors for stimulation of muscles. Since adapted for use during sex (and other deviant practices.) Remi misspelled it because he knows nothing of such things. Or maybe Remi was referring to Transcutaneous Electrical Moron Stimulation. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
monkycndo 0 #17 December 19, 2005 Saw this recently on TV. With the weather getting/being cold, a reminder to all the people that start pumping gas into their car and then get back in the car to stay warm. When you slide off of the seat to get out, you can develop a pretty good size static charge on your body. If it discharges when you have your hand at the filler hose, it can ignite the fumes from the tank. To prevent this, touch metal on the car prior to touching the fuel hose to dissipate the charge that might be on your body. You might get a zap, but it just won't hurt as much. Of lesser importance, to prevent getting shocked by the screw on the light switch cover plate, replace the metal screws with nylon ones color matched to the plate. They are available at electrical supply houses and better hardware stores. This has been a public service announcement. And now back to your regularly scheduled program.50 donations so far. Give it a try. You know you want to spank it Jump an Infinity Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest #18 December 19, 2005 Yes. My wife has the same problem. She once made an arc jump about an inch between her finger and a car door. It got so bad that she started wearing a short length of fine chain around her ankle. Too small to be noticed, but gave her much relief from shocking herself half to death every time she went shopping. The culprit is "Galvanic Skin Response", or GSR. Some people naturally have higher skin resistance than others, and can build up a significant charge. People who work in fireworks and munitions factories are tested for GSR. Static Discharge + volatiles = BOOM. mh"The mouse does not know life until it is in the mouth of the cat." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Salsa_John 0 #19 December 19, 2005 bzzzzzzzzztph! "You did what?!?!" MUFF #3722, TDSM #72, Orfun #26, Nachos Rodriguez Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SpeedRacer 1 #20 December 20, 2005 QuoteTransmission Electron Microscopy joke??? Transcutaneous Electrical Neural Stimulation, IIRC. Often used by chiropractors for stimulation of muscles. Since adapted for use during sex (and other deviant practices.) Remi misspelled it because he knows nothing of such things. hey great billvon is on here. Maybe he can give his opinion about this. He will probably say it's bullshit. I'm reading Atlas Shrugged by Ayn Rand. Someone invented an engine that runs on static eletricity derived from the air. I'm guessin Ayn Rand lived in Denver. And I'm guessing if you wanna pass someone in the left lane you gotta take off a wool sweater really fast. Speed Racer -------------------------------------------------- Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ltdiver 3 #21 December 20, 2005 Quote>Transmission Electron Microscopy joke??? Transcutaneous Electrical Neural Stimulation, IIRC. Often used by chiropractors for stimulation of muscles. Since adapted for use during sex (and other deviant practices.) Remi misspelled it because he knows nothing of such things. Actually, Bill, its TENS for Transcutaneous-Electrical-Nerve-Stimulation. It is for pain control through the nervous system. This does -not- cause muscle contraction. For muscle contraction, through nerve reaction, you use a NMES. Neural-Muscular-Electrical-Stimulation. Completely different applications. btw, used for sex toys? Hmmmmm.....OUCH! If turned up high enough to cause muscle contraction it actually doesn't feel good at all! Ask my patients. ltdiver Don't tell me the sky's the limit when there are footprints on the moon Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
highfly 0 #22 December 20, 2005 I remember a little while ago about some dude in Australia burning carpet and his shoes from static build up from walking up and down the office all day long. http://www.esdjournal.com/static/Australia/jacket.htm It may be a hoax though. www.myspace.com/durtymac Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BillyVance 34 #23 December 20, 2005 QuoteI remember a little while ago about some dude in Australia burning carpet and his shoes from static build up from walking up and down the office all day long. http://www.esdjournal.com/static/Australia/jacket.htm It may be a hoax though. I think I broke that story on here.... I remember that... unbelievable shit!"Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gravitational 0 #24 December 20, 2005 Dude...I took out two gas pumps up by George's house in Houston last week when I zapped them with the static electricity that I had built up. It's pretty dry down here right now too.------ Michael Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ACMESkydiver 0 #25 December 20, 2005 QuoteQuote>Transmission Electron Microscopy joke??? Transcutaneous Electrical Neural Stimulation, IIRC. Often used by chiropractors for stimulation of muscles. Since adapted for use during sex (and other deviant practices.) Remi misspelled it because he knows nothing of such things. Actually, Bill, its TENS for Transcutaneous-Electrical-Nerve-Stimulation. It is for pain control through the nervous system. This does -not- cause muscle contraction. For muscle contraction, through nerve reaction, you use a NMES. Neural-Muscular-Electrical-Stimulation. Completely different applications. But...I use a TENS machine and it does cause muscle contraction. It says 'TENS' right on the unit. It either gives me the buzzy vibe or pulse that contracts the muscle. Now I'm confused. PS -I use it on a thrice injured hand and thumb joint, NOT for kinky sh*t. ~Jaye Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
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