Nataly 38 #1 November 19, 2009 So last night I went on a date with this guy I didn't think would be my type.. But since he consistently made me laugh, I thought I shouldn't be a snob, so we met up for supper.. I had SO much fun and laughed until my ribs hurt.. But sadly he's the kind of guy I'd *love* to have as a friend but have no desire to have a physical relationship with.. I think it's a shame, really.. I mean.. It's pretty hard to find someone so cool and so funny.. But I feel like I'm too old to have guy "friends" anymore.. It's cool if there is no interest on either side, but he was like a drooling puppy all night.. It would only end up being one of those one-sided attractions that just isn't healthy.. *sigh*.. If only I weren't so shallow.. "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AggieDave 6 #2 November 19, 2009 Shame? Shame for that guy. He's probably stuck as "the guy friend" with a lot of chicks. Getting stuck in friend mode is ok, just not all the time. --"When I die, may I be surrounded by scattered chrome and burning gasoline." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
futuredivot 0 #3 November 19, 2009 next time you ask "Where are the good guys? Why can't I find a man that treats me well?" Remember this one you just pissed away. Nice guys finish last. You FALL in lust-you GROW to love.You are only as strong as the prey you devour Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryoder 1,412 #4 November 20, 2009 Poor guy; Already stuck on the friends ladder. "There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LisaH 0 #5 November 20, 2009 Give him a try, you might like it. Be yourself! MooOOooOoo Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
normiss 644 #6 November 20, 2009 Nicely said. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nataly 38 #7 November 20, 2009 Quote next time you ask "Where are the good guys? Why can't I find a man that treats me well?" Remember this one you just pissed away. Nice guys finish last. You FALL in lust-you GROW to love. I don't think it's cause he's too nice or because I'm looking for lust.. But in this case, he just reminded me too much of my brother.. Great fun, but can't imagine ever having a physical relationship with someone who's like a sibling "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
downwardspiral 0 #8 November 20, 2009 Quotenext time you ask "Where are the good guys? Why can't I find a man that treats me well?" Remember this one you just pissed away. Nice guys finish last. You FALL in lust-you GROW to love. Nah he's probably a prick too. If there's no chemistry what can she do about it. Nataly - stop being so damn shallow and at least give the guy a hand job.www.FourWheelerHB.com Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryoder 1,412 #9 November 20, 2009 Quote I don't think it's cause he's too nice or because I'm looking for lust.. But in this case, he just reminded me too much of my brother.. Great fun, but can't imagine ever having a physical relationship with someone who's like a sibling Obviously, you aren't from West VIrginia."There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nataly 38 #10 November 20, 2009 Quote Nataly - stop being so damn shallow and at least give the guy a hand job. Ah ha ha!!! Well.. I don't think I need to do that.. English girls are pretty easy - he can just pick one up at the pub "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wolfriverjoe 1,371 #11 November 20, 2009 What in particular rules out the physical attraction? I posted in another thread about the need for intellect, personality and physical attractions for a relationship to have a future. But the "physical" side has a lot of leeway in it. I'm no supermodel, and I certainly don't expect to land one. Is there any chance for the physical attraction to grow? I've known some women who I found unattractive at first grow to be more so as I got to know them (the attraction was toward the "inner" person, but it made the physical shortcomings less noticable) Keep in mind a nice guy who clearly likes you and makes you laugh is not one who you come across every day. OTOH, you are correct in realizing the "one-sided friend" thing gets really uncomfortable and messy. I'm currently in this dude's place. I seem to be getting really good at making women "friends" but can't seem to make the leap past that. Although I still stay in touch, and occasionally get together, spending a lot of time together or doing much more than lunch or a dog-walk gets too weird."There are NO situations which do not call for a French Maid outfit." Lucky McSwervy "~ya don't GET old by being weak & stupid!" - Airtwardo Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kj126 0 #12 November 20, 2009 Sure you may not like him and the sex may not even be that great. But sure beats piddling yourself. I Am Sofa King We Todd Did!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Zenister 0 #13 November 20, 2009 Quotenext time you ask "Where are the good guys? Why can't I find a man that treats me well?" Remember this one you just pissed away. Nice guys finish last. You FALL in lust-you GROW to love. ^^this... when you 'write someone off' without actually 'trying' you really have no idea if you had any chemistry at all... its like claiming there is no reaction when neither substance has actually intermixed.____________________________________ Those who fail to learn from the past are simply Doomed. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nataly 38 #14 November 20, 2009 Quote What in particular rules out the physical attraction? Is there any chance for the physical attraction to grow? I've known some women who I found unattractive at first grow to be more so as I got to know them (the attraction was toward the "inner" person, but it made the physical shortcomings less noticable) I've had chemistry with guys that weren't at all what you would call "attractive".. This guy was handsome enough.. He just reminded me of a sibling. Dunno.. Can't pinpoint it exactly.. There was just.. well.. no chemistry. And it's not that I've ruled it out entirely.. I'm obviously thinking about it - I posted this thread, no? But yeah.. I'm not looking for lightening to strike exactly.. But for some reason this was *totally* platonic for me. And I could tell he was more interested than me.. Who knows.. The one thing I *don't* want is an unbalanced friendship.. I've been on both sides of those and they are never a good idea.. One person always gets their feelings hurt.. Meh.. It was just one date!! "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryoder 1,412 #15 November 20, 2009 Quote Nataly - stop being so damn shallow and at least give the guy a hand job. Good idea! When she discovers he's hung like Secretariat, that might change everything."There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #16 November 20, 2009 http://www.greatfunnypictures.com/pictures/2545_2808.jpg yeah he's fucked....high sided right into the bushes. but sad part is that it as 90% your fault. You stated I went on a date with this guy I didn't think would be my type So you had made up your mind before the date that you weren't going to ride this guy like a mechanical bull. Baring anything major, such as you screwing this guy to prove me wrong, he isn't going to get anything.Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SkyBastard 0 #17 November 20, 2009 well he must have done something right i didn't even get further thsn a phone call! Dude #320 "Superstitious" is just a polite way of saying "incredibly fucking stupid". DONK! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nataly 38 #18 November 20, 2009 Quote well he must have done something right i didn't even get further thsn a phone call! I thought you were going out with the hot barmaid!! "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Zep 0 #19 November 20, 2009 I think you my girl are living on the wrong side of the river. Gone fishing Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jimmytavino 16 #20 November 20, 2009 Divot !!!!!! that post was remarkable, and maybe ,,,,, one of the first serious sets of words,,, i've ever seen from you... bravo. Nataly!!!...... date Divot... jmy Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
futuredivot 0 #21 November 20, 2009 Quote Nataly!!!...... date Divot... My wife would have a problem with that, she's funny that wayBut, in the Nice Guy bucket, Nataly blows off this perfectly nice guy that evidently has a thing for her. I'm an over the hill, butt ugly jackass with a beautiful wife who adores meI'm glad life isn't fairYou are only as strong as the prey you devour Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jimmytavino 16 #22 November 20, 2009 roger that......my bad.. Hmmmm beautiful Wife?,,,, And she's funny??? AND she adores you???? I can tell that YOu adore her.....too.. It's true what they say,,, that "still waters run deep", and it's more about what is inside... than what is outside...( although Chemistry IS important...) anyway... good deal... carry on. Nat.... you'll be fine... just stay open to ALL possibilities...ya' never know.....jmy Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nataly 38 #23 November 20, 2009 Quote Quote Nataly!!!...... date Divot... My wife would have a problem with that, she's funny that wayBut, in the Nice Guy bucket, Nataly blows off this perfectly nice guy that evidently has a thing for her. I'm an over the hill, butt ugly jackass with a beautiful wife who adores meI'm glad life isn't fair Note that I did not just blow him off.. I'm just personally disappointed that I didn't feel any chemistry because he's so much fun. I *want* there to be chemistry, but you can't force these things.. That being said, I haven't written him off, but equally, I don't want to lead him on.. It's just a bit tricky. I want to see him again, but I have to be honest with myself (and him) that if no chemistry develops it's just not gonna happen.. I'm reluctant to go down the "just friends" route, because it's been my experience that this is just a bad situation, period. So yeah.. Not sure what the next move should be, really. Open to suggestions, though "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
futuredivot 0 #24 November 20, 2009 You're really not going to be able to tell where it might lead until you give him head.You are only as strong as the prey you devour Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nataly 38 #25 November 20, 2009 Quote You're really not going to be able to tell where it might lead until you give him head. This is a rookie mistake.. Once I do that he's inevitably going to turn into my own personal man-servant.. Then I'll *never* know the real him!!!! "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites