Classic Whuffo Questions

[3fLiEr 0]

Inspired by another thread – what are the most stupid questions a whuffo has asked you about the sport………
1) When do you decide to come down – “come in number 5 your time is up”
2) What happens if your chute fails – “you have a reserve”
3) What happens if your reserve fails – “you die”
4) How far do you go up when your chute comes out
5) Its unnatural surely – “yep gravity is the most unnatural thing in the world”
6) Does it hurt when you touch someone in freefall coz you fall so fast?
7) The more experienced you get the higher you go – “yep soon I can go into space”
8) How do you decide where to land – “huh?”
9) Can you breathe? – “no we all sufficate”
10) Don’t you get bored after doing one or two jumps? – “don’t your single brain cell get bored”
11) I used to be a skydiver I did a static line jump once – “mmm interesting that”
12) I’m a skydiver – I did a tandem once – “prat”
13) What happens if you forget to pull your parachute? – “you get another go to try again”
14) 700ft that’s really high!
15) Do you pack your own or do you need an instructor to pack it for you?
16) How many people do you know have died – “1 horse rider and a car driver”
17) Oh so you must jump off buildings as well then? – “yeah I skydive so I must BASE as well”
18) You are all crazy death wish people – “we are safer than most people”
Their must be some classics out there – these are just things my work collegues have said – I now never ever talk about skydiving to whuffos – they just cant understand……………….
bsbd
"In a world where we are slaves to gravity I am pleased to be a freedom fighter"

[RemiAndKaren 0]

ROTFL@14
Remi
Muff 914

[3fLiEr 0]

I dont have a clue about internet language.. what is
ROTFL????
yours
Mr Internet Ignoramus
"In a world where we are slaves to gravity I am pleased to be a freedom fighter"

[RemiAndKaren 0]

rolling on the floor laughing
Remi
Muff 914

[james1010 0]

I actually heard the mother of a static line student ask this:
"If both parachutes fail to open, can she sue the dropzone?"

[flyhi 24]

Worked with a guy who, to make a little money, was a jump pilot. After a particularly harried day of his "cargo" telling him how and where to fly he said to me, "If they were really worried about things going wrong, they wouldn't be jumping out of an airplane."
He didn't last.
flyhi

[Pammi 0]

Those are hilarious! The most commonly heard by me is that I'm irresponsible and being asked if I pack my own chute. That last one seems to shock people! Hmm..maybe it just shocks people 'cuz it's me....haha!
Closing pin jewelry

[SkydiveMonkey 0]

I'm in a university club that does S/L progression, and i get asked a lot if I 'did' freefall when I go to max. 10000' static line? No thanks !!
I like my women like I like my coffee - hot and with a spoon in

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[RemiAndKaren 0]

the breathing one is a classic.. an old FAQ that was 90 truth and 10% complete bullshit was around in the early 90's and for breathing, it explained that our skin folds in freefall so that it could absorb more oxymen by osmosis, hence we dindt need to breathe... and that "factoid" made it to the main meadia last year in a nbc news bit.. lol
Remi
Muff 914

[SkydiveMonkey 0]

it's true !! As you fall so fast, the air gets pushed through the skin !! Everybody knows that
I like my women like I like my coffee - hot and with a spoon in

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[RemiAndKaren 0]

found it..
http://www.afn.org/skydive/faq/faq.html#whuffo
Remi
Muff 914

[philhartree 0]

you're a 'net whuffo
roflmao....
Phil
---
If you have to ask, you don't understand

[chicagoskydiver 0]

I would add this one....Doesn't it hurt when you land? Of course! That's why we love it so much!! Masochism!!
Hackey

[james1010 0]

I've told whuffos at work that we actually have a couple high school students that come out on weekends and pack. That one really blows thier minds.

[NtheSeaOrSky 0]

My favorite question so far: "Are you bird shit or a fool? "Cause those are the only things that fall from the sky." My reply........."Then I MUST be a UFO!"
Overheard at the DZ during a big gathering where one girl was in charge of everyones gear check before boarding the plane: "She's checking to make sure they didn't forget their parachute"

[skybytch 259]

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a couple high school students that come out on weekends and pack. That one really blows thier minds.

We had a ten year old that used to pack student rigs. She did a great job, never packed a mal. Was hilarious - "uhh... is that little girl supposed to be messing with that parachute?" "Yeah, she's packing it, that's the one you'll be jumping."
Mwahahahahahahaa
pull and flare,
lisa

[jfields 0]

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We had a ten year old that used to pack student rigs.

My wife is pregnant... and I'm already counting down the days until I have my own personal packer that I can drag to the DZ.
Justin
My Homepage

[lummy 4]

I almost had my son convinced that he should learn to pack for me. He wanted to be the "world's youngest packer" and end up in Guiness

[PhreeZone 15]

My packer this summer was either me, a college student or his 15 year old sister. We were told that we are contributing to her college fund each time we have her pack for us. My question is can I get that as a tax write off for education expences? I want to touch the sky, I want to fly so high ~ Sonique

[Tee 0]

My friend, who is a tandem master, tells his students that if we go through the edge of a cloud that he will have to hold his breath because clouds are made of water and if you breathe in them you will drown!! We have video of him pointing to the clouds and his student holds his breath, turns his head to the side as my friend pretends to be pushing the clouds away with his hands....as soon as they were out, the student started geeking the camera again.....HILARIOUS!!
Or..."Can you jump in the rain?"....."No, because we would be hitting the pointy end of the raindrop on the way down and that hurts. "
Tee

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[FallingMarc 0]

The 3 most common ones I get are, in this order, "is it fun?", "is it scary?" and "do you pack your own parachute?"
When people ask what happens when the parachute doesn't open(always "when" not "if" for some reason...), I tell them about cutting away and the reserve... then they always ask "did that ever happen to you?" I love the look on their face... "Yeah, once. But then I learned to pack."
The only one that makes me mad out of sheer cluelessness is "why do you spend all that time and money on it? All you do is fall down." Grr... I've given up on trying to explain it though, now what I do is invite them over and put in Good Stuff.
M

[freeflir29 0]

"When people ask what happens when the parachute doesn't open"
I like to say......"Well first.....I scream like a little girl. Then I close my eyes and hope it makes the bad gravity man stop...."
"Carb Heat On....Carb Heat On.....Carb Heat On..."-Phil Polstra Clay

[mnischalke 0]

"If both parachutes fail to open, can (I) sue the dropzone?"
--not if your kid lands on you.

[FreeFlyFreaky 0]

Girlfriend: Do you know anyone who has been seriously injured or killed?
Me: Yeah, one day about six months ago I was here when a guy broke both his legs.
Girlfriend: On the same skydive?
Whit
btw, yes, she's blond....

[canopycudler 0]

Some of my personal favorites...
1. My mom when i told her i ordered my new wings container "i thought you had a backpack?"
2. do most injuries occur when you hit the ground?
3. Is that a shark tooth on your necklace?
Gotta Love um!!
Tina..