My rant about job interviews/cover letters/resumes

[Vallerina 2]

Since my current position is ending, I started the job searching process again. I do not like this process. It's silly.

First, you start out with your resume. I don't have too many qualms with this except for the fact that 30 different people like 30 different things, so you'll never have the perfect resume. Some people like an objective...others don't. All that really matters is what the person that is reading your resume thinks. Fifty other opinions on what they might think gets annoying.

Secondly, you have to write a cover letter. This is the beginning of the bs. Yes, it's useful so that you can clearly show which position you are applying for, but the bs is when you have to talk about the company. "Yes, I just love the way your company bought out a smaller company to streamline blah blah blah."

Lastly is the interview. This is the part that I hate the most. Why do they ask questions like, "What's your biggest weakness?" Do they want the best bullshitters in their company? Now, I can see how bsing can come in handy, but it has more to do with poise than lying or exaggerating. Why ask "trick" questions like that? Also, why must interviews last all day long? Why do I have to tell 6 different people the same thing? Just put them all in one room at the same time and get it over with!

Sigh...I hope I get as lucky as Sunny!

There's a thin line between Saturday night and Sunday morning

[sunshine 2]

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Sigh...I hope I get as lucky as Sunny!

You know what i've gone through though. How many resumes and cover letters i had to send out. Ugh, i'm just glad it finally paid off. And working next to a casino..hrm...

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[Vallerina 2]

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You know what i've gone through though. How many resumes and cover letters i had to send out. Ugh, i'm just glad it finally paid off. And working next to a casino..hrm...

Yeah, I know you had your share of this crap, too. I'm so happy for you!!! We'll have to go to that casino next time I'm in town!

There's a thin line between Saturday night and Sunday morning

[DrunkMonkey 0]

Hell, I'm going to be out of the AF in about 3 1/2 weeks. I have my resume' and cover leter ready, but the thing is I have never been unemployed since age 18. I haven't the slightest what I am going to do... I want a job that will allow me to learn and have a sense of accomplishment, something I dont have now.

It's only going to be for about 18 months while I work the law school admissions process.

I just hate being in a holding pattern...

Chicago...see you soon.

[Katzeye 0]

Whoa - people actually MAIL resumes in the age of the internet? Weird.

Is a chicken omelette redundant?

[Vallerina 2]

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Whoa - people actually MAIL resumes in the age of the internet? Weird.

Really. Who?

There's a thin line between Saturday night and Sunday morning

[tigra 0]

A friend of mine has been using monster, and the bulk of the correspondence (up top the interview, I guess) is anonymous- she doesn't know what company she's talking to. Whith my luck, if I did that. I would end up emiling my resume to my current boss- how embarrassing would that be?

[BlueEyedMonster 0]

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Whoa - people actually MAIL resumes in the age of the internet? Weird.

Really. Who?

Thats funny... No one actually reads the resume's until the interview either... ESPECIALLY the ones on Monster. Its all done with key word searches. You could be the best person. But if your resume is missing one skill that they listed--no matter how poetic your BS, no one will ever see your resume.

[billvon 2,400]

>I don't have too many qualms with this except for the fact that
> 30 different people like 30 different things . . .

Doesn't matter. List your education, the things you've done, awards, papers published etc in a clear and concise format, and don't worry about using helvetica vs geneva font or bullets vs numbers. There are two purposes for a resume - one, to list your experience, and two, to prove to people you can make lists of things.

>Secondly, you have to write a cover letter.

Same thing. Say what you want and write it well. It's a test to see if you can spell, basically.

>Why do they ask questions like, "What's your biggest weakness?"

Cause they think it's a clever trick question.

When I interview, I have one basic core question. "What do you want to do here?" I'm constantly amazed that people have trouble answering it. Most of them say "to get an exciting position at a forward thinking company where my aggressive blah blah blah." So I ask them again - "What do you want to do? Do you want to write code? Sit at a desk? Be in a lab? Do research? Proofread? Mount antennas on base stations?" An amazing number of them can't answer. It's like they had never considered the question.

>Also, why must interviews last all day long? Why do I have to tell 6
> different people the same thing?

So if you get one dick it doesn't ruin your chances of getting hired.

[ChasingBlueSky 0]

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Whoa - people actually MAIL resumes in the age of the internet? Weird.

Yes, without a doubt. It depends on the industry - not all of them are internet reliant.

There isn't one right way to get a job anymore - it is more about following a method and spending the time to get it done.

The biggest item? NETWORK! "Who" you know is the best way to get the job, not the internet. There are a few people on this board that get multiple job leads and advice from me on a daily basis - most of those leads are coming from groups I belong to or relationships I have built. A good portion of those jobs are not on the interenet job boards.

_________________________________________
you can burn the land and boil the sea, but you can't take the sky from me....
I WILL fly again.....

[happythoughts 0]

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A friend of mine has been using monster...

I replied to a monster ad yesterday. It was posted two days ago. The company was listed and it had an auto-responder that sends this message:

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Thank you for submitting your resume to XXX company.

Unfortunately, we do not currently have any open positions that match your background and skill sets or that are located in your current geographic location.

I got that message back within 30 minutes.
Nice to know that I was "considered".

There are some companies that are required to do a "national search" as part of the legal bs that is required. Of course, I am required to send them an email as part of the unemployment legal bs, so it is handy.

The best ones are the ones who are looking to sell their product. They will post an ad to collect resumes that include the last 5 places that you worked on Platform A or with Product B. Then their sales people have a new valid list of prospective clients.

[Vallerina 2]

Fine, Bill! Be all "reasonable."

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>I don't have too many qualms with this except for the fact that
> 30 different people like 30 different things . . .

Doesn't matter. List your education, the things you've done, awards, papers published etc in a clear and concise format, and don't worry about using helvetica vs geneva font or bullets vs numbers. There are two purposes for a resume - one, to list your experience, and two, to prove to people you can make lists of things.

>Secondly, you have to write a cover letter.

Same thing. Say what you want and write it well. It's a test to see if you can spell, basically.

>Why do they ask questions like, "What's your biggest weakness?"

Cause they think it's a clever trick question.

When I interview, I have one basic core question. "What do you want to do here?" I'm constantly amazed that people have trouble answering it. Most of them say "to get an exciting position at a forward thinking company where my aggressive blah blah blah." So I ask them again - "What do you want to do? Do you want to write code? Sit at a desk? Be in a lab? Do research? Proofread? Mount antennas on base stations?" An amazing number of them can't answer. It's like they had never considered the question.

>Also, why must interviews last all day long? Why do I have to tell 6
> different people the same thing?

So if you get one dick it doesn't ruin your chances of getting hired.

I just never understood why all 6 couldn't sit in the same room at one time and make the day go by a lot faster.

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"What do you want to do here?" I'm constantly amazed that people have trouble answering it.

My last interview went really well because that's pretty much all he asked. Well, that and "What did you do in your previous job?" It was straightforward and so very refreshing. I actually talked to him about the job instead of trying to put on whatever interview face they wanted to see.

There's a thin line between Saturday night and Sunday morning

[billvon 2,400]

>I just never understood why all 6 couldn't sit in the same room at one
>time and make the day go by a lot faster.

Cause if 6 people took 6 hours to ask all the questions that's 36 man-hours to interview one person. We tried that. It's a lot more efficient if you have a series of interviewers, any one of which can hit the buzzer and terminate the whole thing. That way you only spend one man-hour on the real losers, and six man-hours on the good prospects.

Take it as a good sign if they spent six hours with you!

[Stacy 0]

most job interviews are a load of horse crap. you get dressed up (moreso than you would for your normal job), go in and answer questions with no relevance to the job (Tell me your biggest mistake. )
Some interviewers don't know how to interview. I liek the ones where the only question asked is "Tell me a little about yourself." blah blah.

I've done so many interviews in the past two years I could write a cover letter on autopilot. Luckily I"ve finally taken a position that suits me well and that I actually enjoy going to work.

One time I interviewed for this lady who looked exactly like Frankenstein's bride. SHe had the electric white lightening bolts in her hair too.

[JohnRich 4]

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Whoa - people actually MAIL resumes in the age of the internet? Weird.

Actually, that's a way to force a manager to lay eyes on your cover letter and resume, rather than just scan it too quickly online and shitcan it. I think a paper copy received in the mail is more likely to receive more attention.

Here's something that drives me crazy (see attached image): an online job board gives you a box the size of just two lines of text, into which to enter your resume. There's no way you can cut and paste your resume into that tiny box, scroll around, and see whether or not it looks correct. What moron designed this web page?

[piisfish 135]

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Whoa - people actually MAIL resumes in the age of the internet? Weird.

Really. Who?

ME

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Why do I have to tell 6 different people the same thing? Just put them all in one room at the same time and get it over with!

That's also what happened to me (not 6 actually, only 5)

And I have the job now

scissors beat paper, paper beat rock, rock beat wingsuit - KarlM

[billvon 2,400]

> most job interviews are a load of horse crap. . . .

Which ends up working out, since most interviewees are interviewing for jobs they have no hope of performing. The ones I find the most odd are the ones that have clearly spent time at a how-to-interview-well course but apparently very little time in their how-to-be-an-engineer courses.

[BlueEyedMonster 0]

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There's no way you can cut and paste your resume into that tiny box, scroll around, and see whether or not it looks correct.

This is because it does not matter if it looks correct. A person will propbably not even look at it... a computer will. And if you get an interview, the first thing they will ask for is a copy of your resume. Of course, because its too damn hard to read the stupid form the computer gives them.

[Acensky 0]

I hope that your interviews go better then mine did.
On the way to the interview there was an accident on the free way, got there 45 min. late. I had called them before to let them know.
Interview went great.
Got a call today from Helly Hansen they said "thank you for your interest in working with us...... but we are looking for someone more flexible." I said ok thank you and hung up.
I am a little bummed but something better will come up, they always do.

Sorry to hijack your thread with my little story.


I know you will find a great job. I have never met you in person, but I know that you are a wonderful person.

Garbage bags do not make good parachutes.