Snowwhite 0 #26 April 26, 2005 Offist Honester, I'm not as think as you drunk I am.skydiveTaylorville.org [email protected] Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Travman 6 #27 April 26, 2005 An instructors at my DZ got pulled over by a cop for speeding. The cop asked him for his licence so he pulled out his F licence (in australia we go to F) and the cop was a bit confused and said "Whats this?" and the instructor said "Its my F licence, it allows me to do f**king everything." Yes, he did get a ticket. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skysprite 0 #28 April 26, 2005 QuoteBilly, I told you this one trick got me out of a ticket. I don't say anything, I just act deaf It really worked? You're so bad, Mar! I love it! ~skysprite Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
flyangel2 2 #29 April 26, 2005 QuoteQuoteBilly, I told you this one trick got me out of a ticket. I don't say anything, I just act deaf It really worked? You're so bad, Mar! I love it! After working with deaf people for close to 19 years, I sure know how to talk like one of them. You should have seen the look on the cops face. Priceless!May your trails be crooked, winding, lonesome, dangerous, leading to the most amazing view. May your mountains rise into and above the clouds. - Edward Abbey Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
popsjumper 2 #30 April 27, 2005 ...I was NOT drunk in public, yer honer...I was drunk in a bar and they threw me out into public. . . . . line stolen from "unknown" (edited to correct the shimell spelling)My reality and yours are quite different. I think we're all Bozos on this bus. Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RkyMtnHigh 0 #31 April 27, 2005 "Say my ABC's backwards?..I can't do that SOBER much less now" "No officer, I didn't realize I was speeding, I was just looking for a Taco Bell" He escorted me to the Taco Bell in Golden CO and waved g'bye _________________________________________ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Stewie 0 #32 April 27, 2005 While pulled over in Illinois: Cop: "Can I see your license & registration?" Buddy: (without missing a beat) "Can I see your hat?" Cop was not amused....I damn near pissed myself laughing, however."Fuck that. I'll take a good ass-pounding over a bj any day." -- pyrotech Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ham 0 #33 April 27, 2005 Quote...I was NOT drunk in public, yer honer...I was drunk in a bar and they threw me out into public. line stolen from "unknown" Ron Tater Salad White Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
pdj6p 0 #34 April 27, 2005 To qoute a friend of mine "Damnitt officer! You made me spill my beer.." We were 16 at the time and believe it or not we did not get a ticket or taken jail. Death is so permanant, and I'm just not ready for that kind of committment. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
fenceline 0 #35 April 27, 2005 That will add how many points to my licence?? SWEET, 2 more and I get the TOASTER!!!!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
UntamedDOG 0 #36 April 27, 2005 It also helps not to have "Cop Killer" playing on your stereo. I once got pulled over and I had a bumpersticker that said "I hate COPS". When the pig asked me about it, I said it stands for Cowardly Oppressive Pieces of Shit I pleaded my first amendment rights and got off with a warning. Only in America. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ron 7 #37 April 27, 2005 Pulled over for speeding. Cop askes to see my pilots license......I ALMOST handed it to him. I instead acted nice and got a ticket... If I ever have a smart ass cop ask that again...Im going to hand it to him."No free man shall ever be debarred the use of arms." -- Thomas Jefferson, Thomas Jefferson Papers, 334 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Icon134 0 #38 April 27, 2005 QuoteCop askes to see my pilots license......I ALMOST handed it to him. I instead acted nice and got a ticket... I would have handed it to him... seriously if he wants to be a smart a$$ then why shouldn't you be one... Livin' on the Edge... sleeping with my rigger's wife... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ron 7 #39 April 27, 2005 QuoteIn Reply To -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- Cop askes to see my pilots license......I ALMOST handed it to him. I instead acted nice and got a ticket... -------------------------------------------------------------------------------- I would have handed it to him... seriously if he wants to be a smart a$$ then why shouldn't you be one... Cause I was 19 and trying to be nice so maybe he would let me out of the ticket. To this day I regret not giving it to him...."No free man shall ever be debarred the use of arms." -- Thomas Jefferson, Thomas Jefferson Papers, 334 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
popsjumper 2 #40 April 27, 2005 thanks, Ham....I couldn't remember his name for beans.... Cop: Son, do you know how fast you were going? Me: Yes. Cop: ...... Me: Well? Cop: You were going 63 miles per hour. Me: NO WAY! This pile of rust won't go a foot over 40!. Cop: Here's your warning...don't do it again in Loganville.My reality and yours are quite different. I think we're all Bozos on this bus. Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Icon134 0 #41 April 27, 2005 QuoteCause I was 19 and trying to be nice so maybe he would let me out of the ticket. That's a good reason... I probably would have done the same... even if he didn't get the joke it would have been great for a laugh... I do recall one time when I was about 18 and me and a group of friends were loading a whole mess of "For Sale" signs (that had just been left in my friends front yard... we caught the guys and chased them off trying to TP the place too...) in the back of my 1969 Nova, mostly because it had the largest trunk. Anyway we were loading them up to return the favor... when... guess who has perfectly timed it to show up to catch us in the act of loading but the police. Well, fortunately, one of my friends is a smoothe talker and convinces the officer (who probably didn't believe him but that's ok) that we were attempting to return the signs to their rightful owners ... at 2330 hrs The cop was nice enough to let us off and suggested that we wait until morning...Livin' on the Edge... sleeping with my rigger's wife... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
white_falcon 0 #42 April 27, 2005 Cop: "your eyes are a little red have you been smoking?" Driver: " your eyes are a little glazed, have you been eating donuts?" scott Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mr2mk1g 10 #43 April 27, 2005 Quotethanks, Ham....I couldn't remember his name for beans.... Cop: Son, do you know how fast you were going? Me: Yes. Cop: ...... Me: Well? Cop: You were going 63 miles per hour. Me: NO WAY! This pile of rust won't go a foot over 40!. Cop: Here's your warning...don't do it again in Loganville. Young chap successfully argued that at court over here at the tail end of last year. Adduced an experts report proving the car was physically incapable of doing the speed the cop claimed. Report probably cost more than the fine but hey, he got to stick two metaphorical fingers up at the cop. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Icon134 0 #44 April 27, 2005 QuoteCop: Son, do you know how fast you were going? Me: Yes. Cop: ...... Me: Well? Cop: You were going 63 miles per hour. Me: NO WAY! This pile of rust won't go a foot over 40!. Cop: Here's your warning...don't do it again in Loganville. My grandfather managed convince a judge that he couldn't have been going as fast as a cop claimed once as well...Livin' on the Edge... sleeping with my rigger's wife... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cwfowlkes 0 #45 April 27, 2005 Calling a cop a pussy in response to his declaration that he'd never have the balls to try skydiving was probably not the brightest considering I was in the process of getting into my car (to DRIVE back to the DZ) after having more than a few beers at the florabama. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
