shah269 0 #1 May 21, 2012 The economics of a mail order bride and how one will allow you to have more funds to skydive. This past Saturday I was at the grocery store when I saw this long legged, flat bellied, perky bobbied amazing assed hoty walking into the coffee isle. I being a true hunter of all sexy ladies thought...I need some coffee as well. So I casually followed this lovely woman to see what she was getting and I could impress her with my charm whit and amazing good looks. And what would you know she was with this IT looking albino guy...way out of her league and they were shopping for coffee together. So this got the better of me so I faked shopped near them to see what was going on! And sure as shit, she had a great Eastern European accent. That jive turkey IT guy had a mail order bride. And that got me thinking. First off I did what any good looking guy with lots of cute female friends would so, looked down my well shaped nose at this man! Ha look at you! Had to buy Bellerose Barbie! What a dork! Looser! Pathetic! I also posted about it on face book to see what the hot lady friends of Shah thought of such an idea of mail order bride...10 nasty grams later! I realized I may have kicked the preverbal bull square in the junk. If these mid 30 something ladies are this pissed it must be worth thinking about! So I drank my boxed wine and thought...and it hit me! It hit me like a shovel to the face! This IT dork I was looking down upon was not a man rather he was A GOD! A TRUE GOD! Average cost of average mail order bride is $4,000 let's say. Average cost of average date is $100. When we do some math, $100*X=$4,000 HOLY CRAP that's only 40 dates! If I cheeped out and went Dutch that's only 80 dates! Boys I now have an MBA thus I understand financial calculations and economics like any fresh faced sexy masters student. Simple math dictates that you are way better off simply buying a mail order wife than actually going out and trying to get lucky in finding that lovely woman who will make you yodel every morning! The Time Value of Money just simply states that it makes financial sense to forgo spending hours listening to useless crap and just buying a long legged, flat bellied, perky boobied amazing assed hotty! And even if you are not into that, FREAK!, I'm sure you can order a "nice one" who has a great personality! Thus you will have more time and money to skydive and work your way to skygodness! Oh and don't worry prenups hold up on court just write a good one and you should be golden! Think of it as your reserve in case things go to shit! So what do you think?Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wmw999 2,163 #2 May 21, 2012 I think you got a big juicy wiggler there Wendy P. There is nothing more dangerous than breaking a basic safety rule and getting away with it. It removes fear of the consequences and builds false confidence. (tbrown) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CSpenceFLY 1 #3 May 21, 2012 QuoteThe economics of a mail order bride and how one will allow you to have more funds to skydive. This past Saturday I was at the grocery store when I saw this long legged, flat bellied, perky bobbied amazing assed hoty walking into the coffee isle. I being a true hunter of all sexy ladies thought...I need some coffee as well. So I casually followed this lovely woman to see what she was getting and I could impress her with my charm whit and amazing good looks. And what would you know she was with this IT looking albino guy...way out of her league and they were shopping for coffee together. So this got the better of me so I faked shopped near them to see what was going on! And sure as shit, she had a great Eastern European accent. That jive turkey IT guy had a mail order bride. And that got me thinking. First off I did what any good looking guy with lots of cute female friends would so, looked down my well shaped nose at this man! Ha look at you! Had to buy Bellerose Barbie! What a dork! Looser! Pathetic! I also posted about it on face book to see what the hot lady friends of Shah thought of such an idea of mail order bride...10 nasty grams later! I realized I may have kicked the preverbal bull square in the junk. If these mid 30 something ladies are this pissed it must be worth thinking about! So I drank my boxed wine and thought...and it hit me! It hit me like a shovel to the face! This IT dork I was looking down upon was not a man rather he was A GOD! A TRUE GOD! Average cost of average mail order bride is $4,000 let's say. Average cost of average date is $100. When we do some math, $100*X=$4,000 HOLY CRAP that's only 40 dates! If I cheeped out and went Dutch that's only 80 dates! Boys I now have an MBA thus I understand financial calculations and economics like any fresh faced sexy masters student. Simple math dictates that you are way better off simply buying a mail order wife than actually going out and trying to get lucky in finding that lovely woman who will make you yodel every morning! The Time Value of Money just simply states that it makes financial sense to forgo spending hours listening to useless crap and just buying a long legged, flat bellied, perky boobied amazing assed hotty! And even if you are not into that, FREAK!, I'm sure you can order a "nice one" who has a great personality! Thus you will have more time and money to skydive and work your way to skygodness! Oh and don't worry prenups hold up on court just write a good one and you should be golden! Think of it as your reserve in case things go to shit! So what do you think? This, coming from you is too easy. It would be like beating up on a handicapped person. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
piisfish 135 #4 May 21, 2012 take 2, and bring them at the DZ scissors beat paper, paper beat rock, rock beat wingsuit - KarlM Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Meso 38 #5 May 21, 2012 You appear to be missing some vital data in your equation. Said mail order bride has most likely chosen such a life because they want an easy life, where they are handed a house, food, transport etc. As opposed to a woman one is most likely to date, who is likely to have more ambition and want to work, and know that she isn't just sucking on the man's metaphorical nipple. While granted there are more than enough woman in general life in the west that are also wanting everything handed to them, I think that the odds are strongly biased that it would be more prevalent in the former. I can assure you it's certainly not normal for a guy to assume majority or even partial payments for the girlfriend within the first year of dating. So let's say, like a normal healthy relationship, there is a minimum of 2 years of dating before moving in together and sharing of financials. Something there won't be with the mail order bride. I must quickly interject here as it's vital to the mathematics, that any woman who doesn't want to at least pay for herself in some areas or offer to pay for certain dates clearly has issues already. Nothing wrong with the guy paying for the first few months of dating, but if you're with a girl who wants you to be paying for every date in the relationship, you're already off to a bad start character-wise, unless of course you're looking for someone who just wants a guy to do everything for her and lacks any motivation or pride. So I will base this equation on the assumption that the woman at least has some pride and is willing to show that she doesn't need someone to pay for her everything to survive. Let's say $250 a month on dating this 'normal' girl. Where as said mail order pride will probably be setting you back about that much just on food alone. Then of course good luck with the extra odd $200 for clothes, $50 for gas, another $300 pm if she wants her own transport. You're going to need to get really lucky to find yourself a mail order bride who doesn't want her 'get everything for free' dream, or who has the desire to work and pay for her half. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #6 May 21, 2012 First off I'm not going to lie, on a whole I am a pragmatist. I'm one who always expects the worst and plans for it and prays for the best. I'm always doing opportunity cost evaluations in my head before making a decision. And thus I don't expect to "bump" into the future Ms. Shah in under 40 dates. Write or wrong it is who I am an how I view the world. That said WRT You're going to need to get really lucky to find yourself a mail order bride who doesn't want her 'get everything for free' dream, or who has the desire to work and pay for her half. Ah I thought the same thing! Marry one of these very attractive long legged, flat bellied, perky boobied hotties...and then I have to feed them! WTF! But while I was putting away my 4th glass of boxed Shiraz and contemplating various nude yoga poses it hit me....apparently lots of things hit me! Of my engineering friends a good HALF are married to women who do not work! No joke! These guys are married to...."handsome" women who do nothing more than clean house, pick up kids and put away copious amounts of calories in preparation for the end times when Twinkies will be all but extinct. And those guys worked hard to get these "well built" women. They actually went on 40 dates and in the end they still ended up with a "stout" partner. Thus I have to reiterate, I WAS WRONG in looking down my amazing nose at the IT GOD and his Bellerose Barbie wife! Now not saying I will do it...but it did give me pause.Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
roostnureye 2 #7 May 21, 2012 QuoteFirst off I'm not going to lie, on a whole I am a pragmatist. I'm one who always expects the worst and plans for it and prays for the best. I'm always doing opportunity cost evaluations in my head before making a decision. And thus I don't expect to "bump" into the future Ms. Shah in under 40 dates. Write or wrong it is who I am an how I view the world. That said WRT You're going to need to get really lucky to find yourself a mail order bride who doesn't want her 'get everything for free' dream, or who has the desire to work and pay for her half. Ah I thought the same thing! Marry one of these very attractive long legged, flat bellied, perky boobied hotties...and then I have to feed them! WTF! But while I was putting away my 4th glass of boxed Shiraz and contemplating various nude yoga poses it hit me....apparently lots of things hit me! Of my engineering friends a good HALF are married to women who do not work! No joke! These guys are married to...."handsome" women who do nothing more than clean house, pick up kids and put away copious amounts of calories in preparation for the end times when Twinkies will be all but extinct. And those guys worked hard to get these "well built" women. They actually went on 40 dates and in the end they still ended up with a "stout" partner. Thus I have to reiterate, I WAS WRONG in looking down my amazing nose at the IT GOD and his Bellerose Barbie wife! Now not saying I will do it...but it did give me pause. Ok shah, so I work with a couple guys that went the mail order bride route and have some info to share with you. 1. Did the bellaruse barbie smile at you? Probably not, because the water over there is horrible and her teeth probably resembled those of a homeless man. Theres another 10k 2. Any time you marry for citizenship you are responsable for that person as a "sponsor" for 10yrs. So that prenump ya its no good 3.That barbie is just looking for her next host to prey on while you are out working to pay off those teeth! 4. Once she finds a richer guy, you still have to pay for her ass to live here until she marries someone else or the 10yrs is up. Seems like beer and floozies at the bonfire are a little better deal huh?Flock University FWC / ZFlock B.A.S.E. 1580 Aussie BASE 121 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #8 May 21, 2012 Her teeth looked ok to me, but wasn't going to ask to check them out...would have been a little odd don't you think? I actually think she was from Colombia, was not 100% sure of the accent. But look here is my story in under a million words, I use to work in Finland, I met my now X wife at a bus stop, we fell in love, I had to fight the US embassy to have her in my life, we got married, she came to the US, we were in love, I paid for 75% of her education and she had a job. I got divorced via text message because she was cheating on me for about 6 months if not more. Opportunity costs are about the same? Be it you bump into Ms. Right at a bus stop or pick her up? I'll be honest with you all, since I always am, I am more pissed at the guy for buying into what appears to be the perfect partner rather than doing his ground work. Looking at the opportunity costs, maybe this is why Trump does this and the rest of us chumps....eat well, dress well, smell well and do our up most to be on our game at any bar any club and any time instead of hanging out with friends and skydiving or making money?Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DrewEckhardt 0 #9 May 21, 2012 Quote Average cost of average mail order bride is $4,000 let's say. Average cost of average date is $100. When we do some math, $100*X=$4,000 HOLY CRAP that's only 40 dates! If I cheeped out and went Dutch that's only 80 dates! That's just the down payment on the lease and you're overlooking the severe penalties for trading her in before the contractual end (when you die or she dies). Quote Boys I now have an MBA thus I understand financial calculations and economics like any fresh faced sexy masters student. Although like most graduates you've yet to figure out how to apply your new found knowledge to real life, even with some relevant first hand experience. Consider what she gets if she's not happy with how you're supporting her with cars (maybe that BMW you bought her wasn't an M series) - half of everything you got since starting your lease plus whatever it takes to maintain the life style you shared while married. I'd joke that's half of everything, although lots of places she's entitled to the same life style (especially if she reproduces with or without your consent) you shared even when that requires more than an equal share. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #10 May 21, 2012 Drew I agree 100% with your evaluation of this discussion. However as I have stated, I know a large number of well educated engineers and scientists who work very hard went on 40+ dates and are now married to "well rounded" "well built" "stout" "handsome" women who are currently stay at home assets...as in their ass is set. Thus, maybe in this circumstance this GOD LIKE IT guy was on the right track?Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
davjohns 1 #11 May 21, 2012 Quote I think you got a big juicy wiggler there Wendy P. OH FOR CYRING OUT LOUD! This is supposed to be the Bonfire! I let this one go because I expected others to jump on it! I can't really be the only one who thought this comment REEKED of innuendo, can I??? And since Wendy isn't one to intentionally create innuendo, I thought surely other forumites would needle her over this. Where has our sense of impropiety gone??? Frankly, I'm disappointed in the lot of you.I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet.. But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #12 May 21, 2012 Hey man I don't know but good god I'm still getting nasty grams from some ladies on face book for even thinking about it! I know I would not do it but....well I guess these ladies are worried that all the good guys will wake up and just buy instead of work for it? Funky right?Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wmw999 2,163 #13 May 21, 2012 Moi? Innuendo? Only if it's innuendo and out the other Wendy P. There is nothing more dangerous than breaking a basic safety rule and getting away with it. It removes fear of the consequences and builds false confidence. (tbrown) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #14 May 21, 2012 OMG i just died laughing, my West Asian friend just told me "Oh you dumb ass white folks! You have to pay? What! Are you kidding me! My mom just got me one two years ago. I didn't even have to ask, she just showed up! I saved time and money bitches!"Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
popsjumper 2 #15 May 21, 2012 ROTFLMAO Economy ride! My reality and yours are quite different. I think we're all Bozos on this bus. Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryoder 1,404 #16 May 22, 2012 "There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
billvon 2,450 #17 May 22, 2012 Sloths are cool. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
billvon 2,450 #18 May 22, 2012 >Boys I now have an MBA thus I understand financial calculations and >economics like any fresh faced sexy masters student. She may not understand stock option vesting schedules but I bet she understands 50%! >Had to buy Bellerose Barbie! I went out with a Bellerose Barbie once. Name was Bethany actually. (Not Beth, Bethany.) Didn't last, although I did find a good pizza place that was on the way, so I got that going for me. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryoder 1,404 #19 May 22, 2012 Quote I went out with a Bellerose Barbie once. Name was Bethany actually. (Not Beth, Bethany.) Didn't last, although I did find a good pizza place that was on the way, so I got that going for me. Did she once date Denny Crane?"There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
riddler 0 #20 May 22, 2012 WTH is wrong with you? This is not how to properly exploit the ambitious dreams of young girls wanting to come to America. The best answer is as follows: Pay expenses for flight over, meals, entertainment, shabby clothes. Rough her up a little, make it known that you know how to dispose of bodies, and have friends in the police (this is common for men in other countries). Pimp her out, give her just enough goodies to make sure she likes you better than any of the ugly johns that you know from your day job (engineers, remember?). When you make a decent profit from the first girl, go buy another. Same procedure. After three girls, you gotta get them spying on each other to make sure you keep them in line. Also, get a driver to haul them around and scare off the other pimps. After six girls, you get a two drivers and a bodyguard. Keep your day job so you have a cover for the IRS, and also a steady supply of customers. Now, your operation is starting to get big, so local gangs are gonna take notice. This is when you don a fake Chicago accent and claim to be affiliated with a family. Take credit for a few of the local gang killings that have gone unsolved. I could go on and on here, but you get the idea. Sadly, I have an uncle that actually did all this with young, gay Mexicans in the 80s (minus the drivers and bodyguard). He was never really caught, but he did get AIDS. Fortunately, the local Mafia didn't care about gay sex trafficking back then. Maybe they do now, I don't know.Trapped on the surface of a sphere. XKCD Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hcsvader 1 #21 May 22, 2012 Dude, hookers and blow. Its all you need in life.Have you seen my pants? it"s a rough life, Livin' the dream >:) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #22 May 22, 2012 QuoteDude, hookers and blow. It's all you need in life. Amen! And if the hookers are bringing the blow...well then there is a god! Nah I'll be honest I was happiest when I was married. So in a way I was kind of pissed at the guy that he cheated his way into buying exactly what he wanted. It's kind of like scrounging around and assembling your rig from things you bought second hand and scrounged around the DZ yeah it fits but it's not exactly 100% what you want.....but you worked hard for it and are like "oh yeah, it may not fit but it's mine bitches!" And then this douche bag just shows up off of jump 11 whips out a wad of cash that could gag a donkey and gets a color matched suit and rig with ever freaking bell and whistle known to man and some and walks around with a big fat shit eating grin on his face. And they you look at your own rig which you worked your ass off with all its flaws and think...SHIT! Man that aint right! And start imposing extra ordinary beer fins on the guy! Funny though when i posted asking my chick friends on face book what they thought, the number of nasty grams i got was amazing! I wonder what the ladies in the ladies room think of this? Since I'm not allowed in any more...go figure!Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hcsvader 1 #23 May 22, 2012 You have much to learn young grasshopper. Get the blow and it will bring the hookers. Well maybe not right away, but eventually if they want more they will find a way Have you seen my pants? it"s a rough life, Livin' the dream >:) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skymama 35 #24 May 22, 2012 QuoteI wonder what the ladies in the ladies room think of this? Since I'm not allowed in any more...go figure! The same ladies who read that forum read this forum, there's no need to bitch about your banning again. I'm sure if said ladies felt the need to reply to your thread here, they would.She is Da Man, and you better not mess with Da Man, because she will lay some keepdown on you faster than, well, really fast. ~Billvon Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hcsvader 1 #25 May 22, 2012 If anyone is looking for a mail order husband i may be available for the right offer.Have you seen my pants? it"s a rough life, Livin' the dream >:) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
