riggerrob 558 #1 August 16, 2014 Our protagonist jumps too close to a thunderstorm and opens over Orange Mass. Jacque Andre Istel meets him after he swoops the bowl. How does his day progress? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Arvoitus 1 #2 August 16, 2014 Bunch of riggers gang up on him, get him drunk and take his gear.Your rights end where my feelings begin. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
yoink 321 #3 August 16, 2014 He gets called a pussy for opening at 3500ft and a homo for all his match matchy gear although he gets props for being stupid /ballsy enough to not have a reserve strapped to his front. He's also absolutely unable to spot a cessna load and is gobsmacked by people with 8 jumps teaching a FJC. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BillyVance 34 #4 August 16, 2014 yoink He gets called a pussy for opening at 3500ft and a homo for all his match matchy gear although he gets props for being stupid /ballsy enough to not have a reserve strapped to his front. He's also absolutely unable to spot a cessna load and is gobsmacked by people with 8 jumps teaching a FJC. Beautifully put together! "Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JohnMitchell 14 #5 August 16, 2014 yoink He's also absolutely unable to spot a cessna load and is gobsmacked by people with 8 jumps teaching a FJC. Perfect. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
quade 3 #6 August 16, 2014 I guess it depends on what kind of skydiver he is. The free flyer will get a few good chuckles from the clown suit. The pro swooper will be seen as some sort of god. The camera flyer? He's probably going to be seen as an alien from another planet.quade - The World's Most Boring Skydiver Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wolfriverjoe 1,346 #7 August 16, 2014 It was an entry in the SDC Summerfest film festival last year (2013). Pretty funny. Using Sandy as the "Old Professor" and Nick as the "Young Professor" is pretty clever. http://www.supaflyskydiving.com/?p=1465"There are NO situations which do not call for a French Maid outfit." Lucky McSwervy "~ya don't GET old by being weak & stupid!" - Airtwardo Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lawrocket 3 #8 August 16, 2014 He looks around and doesn't see anybody else with a Go Pro and realizes he is, without a doubt, the raddest dude there. After repack he regales them with tales of what his new cross-braced canopy can do. He pulls out a couple of quarters and gets up in the air to demonstrate what he can do. That sharp blonde Midge seems to find him particularly groovy. He'll show her and give that crowd a show. He hops out, pulls, sets up and knows he's going to thrill the shit out of all those people watching with his swoop. So he does a 360, pulls out low and plants himself. No way he makes it through the day. My wife is hotter than your wife. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jackwallace 3 #9 August 16, 2014 yoink He gets called a pussy for opening at 3500ft and a homo for all his match matchy gear although he gets props for being stupid /ballsy enough to not have a reserve strapped to his front. He's also absolutely unable to spot a cessna load and is gobsmacked by people with 8 jumps teaching a FJC. It would be a NorsemanU only make 2 jumps: the first one for some weird reason and the last one that you lived through. The rest are just filler. scr 316 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
oldwomanc6 38 #10 August 16, 2014 yoink He gets called a pussy for opening at 3500ft and a homo for all his match matchy gear although he gets props for being stupid /ballsy enough to not have a reserve strapped to his front. He's also absolutely unable to spot a cessna load and is gobsmacked by people with 8 jumps teaching a FJC. I haven't laughed this hard on dizzy, in a long, long, long time. Thank You! lisa WSCR 594 FB 1023 CBDB 9 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
oldwomanc6 38 #11 August 16, 2014 jackwallace ***He gets called a pussy for opening at 3500ft and a homo for all his match matchy gear although he gets props for being stupid /ballsy enough to not have a reserve strapped to his front. He's also absolutely unable to spot a cessna load and is gobsmacked by people with 8 jumps teaching a FJC. It would be a Norseman I have WAY too many jumps out of Norsemans. eta: I just looked at my logbooks, and it's less than 50. I guess that it just seemed like more due to the slow climb rate. lisa WSCR 594 FB 1023 CBDB 9 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
xsniper 1 #12 August 16, 2014 He is bound to owe a case of beer for something!!!!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
oldwomanc6 38 #13 August 16, 2014 lawrocket He looks around and doesn't see anybody else with a Go Pro and realizes he is, without a doubt, the raddest dude there. After repack he regales them with tales of what his new cross-braced canopy can do. He pulls out a couple of quarters and gets up in the air to demonstrate what he can do. That sharp blonde Midge seems to find him particularly groovy. He'll show her and give that crowd a show. He hops out, pulls, sets up and knows he's going to thrill the shit out of all those people watching with his swoop. So he does a 360, pulls out low and plants himself. No way he makes it through the day. Not only that, his GoPro goes dead (with no way to charge in "64) and yet again, w/o video this trip never happened. lisa WSCR 594 FB 1023 CBDB 9 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kallend 1,635 #14 August 19, 2014 quadeI guess it depends on what kind of skydiver he is. The free flyer will get a few good chuckles from the clown suit. The pro swooper will be seen as some sort of god. The camera flyer? He's probably going to be seen as an alien from another planet. He's wearing a wingsuit and gets mistaken for Burt Lancaster. A young Bill Booth makes careful drawings of his three-rings.... The only sure way to survive a canopy collision is not to have one. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
obelixtim 100 #15 August 19, 2014 He'd be grounded for having incorrectly shaped canopies with flimsy looking lines, and an altimeter that didn't come from an aircraft dashboard. If he had no military background someone would prolly set the feds on him. If he somehow was allowed to jump, he'd prolly be called a smartarse for landing on the airfield every time. But he'd find the beer very cheap.My computer beat me at chess, It was no match for me at kickboxing.... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Woofie 0 #16 August 19, 2014 The modern skydiver starts telling tales to the other jumpers of wingsuits, proximity flying, BASE jumping, CRW, video cameras the size of a pack of cigarettes, 200-way skydives, rigs that weigh only 20 lbs., canopies with a 4:1 glide ratio, audible altitude alert gizmos, tippy-toe soft landings, spotting by satellite, 3 centimeter accuracy landings, reserve AADs, and jump aircraft that get to 13k feet in 15 minutes. Everyone thinks he's bat shit crazy and they call the mental health authorities on him. He's never seen or heard from again... The old jumpers go back to their round 24' twill canopies, belly-wart reserves, motorcycle helmets, stop-watches, mechanics coveralls jump suits, and French para-boots, and tell tales over beer of the bat shit crazy man that once visited their drop zone. The sport takes another 50 years to achieve all those amazing improvements. The moral of the story: Sometimes it is worthwhile to listen to people who seem to be bat shit crazy. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
riggerrob 558 #17 August 19, 2014 WoofieThe modern skydiver starts telling tales of wingsuits, proximity flying, BASE jumping, CRW, video cameras the size of a pack of cigarettes, 200-way skydives, rigs that weigh only 20 lbs., canopies with a 4:1 glide ratio, and jump aircraft that get to 13k feet in 15 minutes. Everyone thinks he's bat shit crazy and they call the mental health authorities on him. He's never seen from again... They either conclude that he is crazy, or they ask him to share what he has been smoking! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
1888 0 #18 August 22, 2014 ******He gets called a pussy for opening at 3500ft and a homo for all his match matchy gear although he gets props for being stupid /ballsy enough to not have a reserve strapped to his front. He's also absolutely unable to spot a cessna load and is gobsmacked by people with 8 jumps teaching a FJC. I jumped out of a Norseman 52 years year ago with Lew Sanborn on the Load. I landed at Orange, Istel was on the ground & Daryl Henry, (PCA inst. #7), signed my logbook. I was jumpmaster on jump #12, wearing a 28' rag gore T/U, was tossing static lines and teaching FJC at least by then. Oh yeah, I did my 1st demo on jump #7, (landed out cause I only had a U) and I could spot the shit out of a Cessna cause it was do or die. We drank beer out of cans so the empties wouldn't hurt the spectators. Now I just sit around and read my old log books. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
stayhigh 2 #19 August 22, 2014 Ha, so funny how when you go to surfer's forum, the surfers talk about the same shit. What will you bring if you could hypothetically travel back in time? They said, wetsuit. The best invention for surfers all around the world. 3-ring system and square parachute is the real game changer in the skydiving history right?Bernie Sanders for President 2016 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BillyVance 34 #20 August 22, 2014 Imagine taking a fully-tricked out top of the line SUV with DVD players, all power everything, 4WD, the works, back 50 years and then try to explain all that shit to people then. They'll probably say... "you've got color TV??? Damn..." "Mediocre people don't like high achievers, and high achievers don't like mediocre people." - SIX TIME National Champion coach Nick Saban Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JohnMitchell 14 #21 August 22, 2014 kallend A young Bill Booth makes careful drawings of his three-rings. So it wasn't alien technology, then? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites