Zing

I think "Heavenly Body" is a B-25 ... same type as Dolittle's Raiders flew off a carrier. Zing Lurks

The XB-38 was an engine test-bed for Allison V-1710 liquid-cooled engines, should the Wright engines normally used on the B-17 become unavailable. Zing Lurks

I was disappointed ... nothing whatsoever on the latest fashion trends among the tinfoil hat brigade. Beanies are so 2001. Zing Lurks

Lena married Ole just after the two graduated from high school, and for 30 yeras they worked hard on their farm in Minnesota and raised up their children as good Lutherans. The day finally arrived when the couple found themselves alone in the house after the last child moved out for college. The first morning, at breakfast, Lena looks across the table at her husband and says,"Oh Ole, do you remember vhen ve were young and first married?" "Ja, Lena, I remember dose days pretty good,"Ole says, "Ve sure had some times in dose days." Lena reminds Ole about how they used to sit at the breakfast table naked and how that often lead to some romantic good times. Then she suggests they try that again to see what happens after all those years, so they get naked and sit down. "Ohh, Ole," says Lena, "I tink its working, I'm getting that warm tingly feeling in my nipples." "Ja, ja Lena," says Ole, "But I tink it is because one of dem is in your coffee and de udder one is in your oatmeal." Zing Lurks

I figured the guy was on a "meet and greet" mission ... and was getting ready to shake the locals hands. Zing Lurks

Well, I'm not sure of that. I've been out of fuel, and I've been on fire. Didn't particularly like either of those flights, but I think being both on fire and out of fuel at the same time would have to be classified as having a REALLY BAD DAY. Zing Lurks

Don't forget about the fuel in the fuel truck. Zing Lurks

I think this was my 5th birthday in 1956 when I got a Zorro outfit that had a hat, a mask, gloves, a cape and a plastic sword that held a piece of chalk. It wasn't long before every flat surface in the neighborhood held the "mark of El Zorro." Zing Lurks

Classmates of yours? Zing Lurks

Hell, why spend good money. Somebody on the dropzone must have a big old nine-cell or a ragged out tandem canopy and you can swipe the engine off the dropzone's riding mower when no one is watching. After all, they won't need it to mow again until next Summer, and by then you'll probably be dead or crippled ... and they can have their engine back. Zing Lurks

If you must fly, endeavor to never fly near the edges of the air. If you insist on ignoring this fine piece of advise, then it behooves you to hit the edges of the air as softly and as slowly as possible. Three good landings in a row is procrastination. Zing Lurks

German Me-109 Zing Lurks

"Geronimo!" "Yer dead until you pull!" "Here's a tooth." Zing Lurks

The one that had so many machine guns that it carried no bomb load. Zing Lurks

And if you really dig around, you can find photos of the Grumman Goose with tilt-rotor capabilities that was experimented with after the US military started looking at German records from the war. Zing Lurks

An experimental design for the first generation of tilt-rotor aircraft. Zing Lurks

Yep, all the real cowboys I know now wear sneakers ... they got tired of being mistaken for truck drivers. Zing Lurks

I had heard Spiva died. The Ramblin Rose, now known as The Rose, was living at the Corona California Airport the last time I saw it. It belongs to a guy who operates a club sort of thing that does nostalgia flights. It is now plain aluminum with some crummy green stripes and "Rose" painted on the side of the fuselage. I was flying Joe Crotwell's King Air in and out of Corona for a few years and went over to talk to the folks around the Rose a few times ... but they were just a bunch of assholes ... and poor old Rose isn't in anywheres near the shape she was in when Ken Spiva owned her. Zing Lurks

Naw ... I heard he bounced in Florida a long time ago. Zing Lurks

A serious golfer is on a business trip to the home city of the Master's Tournament and heads to the course to play a round. He insists that he is real serious about his game and does not want to be paired up with any duffers. The reservations clerk points out the window near the first tee, where the most beautiful woman the golfer has ever seen is warming up. "She said the same thing about her game, how about you play a round with her?" says the clerk. The golfer agrees and strolls out to meet the woman. They agree that the winner after 18 holes gets treated to dinner at the restaurant of their choice by the loser, and off they go for 18 holes. Its a tight battle as the round progresses, he plays from the men's tees and she plays from the ladies. After 17 holes, the score is tied and both of them are sitting on the green after two strokes on a par 4 hole. He putts from 25 feet away and leaves his ball just short of the cup, but the woman sinks her 15 foot putt to win by one stroke. He takes her to dinner, then drives her back to her hotel, where they arrange for a rematch the following day, and then to his great pleasure, the beautiful lady golfer gives him the best blowjob he's ever had. She then jumps out of the car and heads for the front door, promising him her best in the rematch the next day. They meet as planned, and once again, its a seesaw round with both of them taking and losing the advantage until once again they arrive on the 18th tee tied. His second shot on the par 4 hole lands on the green and rolls right up to within two feet of the pin, a certain birdie for him, but her second shot lands on the green bounces twice and rolls into the cup for a second win. Once again, he takes the beautiful woman to a fancy restaurant for dinner and drinks, on him, and once again he drives her to her hotel where he gets another great blowjob. As she starts to get out of the car, he takes hold of her hand and says, "please, don't go. I've had the most incredible time with you for the past two days, and I'd really like to get to know you better." To his surprise, the lovely woman begins to cry and sobs inconsolably. "What's wrong?" he asks, "are you married or something?" "No," she says, "the truth is, I'm a transexual and I haven't had the final surgical treatments that will make me a real woman." She looks at him and can see that he is stunned, but his bewilderment quickly turns to anger and he says ... "I can't believe you would deceive me like this," he says. "If you'd been honest with me you'd have played from the men's tees and I'd have won both of those matches!" Zing Lurks

Quit moaning and get packed ... you're on the next load. Zing Lurks

Now, now, mon cherie Shell. Would you care to describe to the youth what you did for your 21st birthday? Zing Lurks

Ahhhh ... age is truly wasted on the youth. Zing Lurks

Well, here's a perspective on Cooper being an experienced (to some degree) jumper. An experienced jumper who hijacked an airliner in 1971 and requested specific sport-type gear (meaning a sport main and reserve parachute system) would realize that that action would point investigators toward looking for an experienced jumper. A relatively small population to sort through at that time. At the same time, an experienced jumper would know that asking for multiple parachutes would get him a selection of gear, and he'd know that an emergency backpack rig, like an NB6 would suffice to make the leap. I'd have no problems going off the airstair door of that airplane at 10 grand, 200 mph, in the dark with an NB6 emergency rig with a 26' Navy conical in it ... no prob at all for $200,000 1971 dollars. Since neither harness was equipped with front-mount D-rings for a sport reserve, I'd cut up the good one to get the cords I need to secure the money, and I'd toss the phony front-mount training reserve out the door to make the cops think I bounced. I could go on, but still I think Cooper's hijack plan was much better thought out than the FBI and a lot of jumpers choose to believe. I also think it more likely that he survived the jump than that he bounced. Zing Lurks

I've seen very few tandem's videos I'd consider worth even $50. In effect, the purchaser of the video is buying a 10 minute canned advertisement that contains less than 30% of footage that actually shows the video buyer. The final tape or CD goes home with the jumper, gets shown a few times and goes on the shelf, rarely to be looked at again. If I bring a friend or relative out for a tandem jump and the price is $200, I expect them to get the tandem jump, a copy of a video of the jump and the preliminairies, not a hand-cam, AND, get treated with respect by a staff demonstrating a professional demeanor, or else I won't be bringing them to your dropzone. I know some vidiots who are damned good camera flyers ... they hold the camera still, the video is in focus and the framing fits the format and the lens. A huge percentage of videos that go home with student jumpers are shot on cheap cameras, edited poorly into a series of cuts spliced jarringly together with overly loud music and poor sound quality to the voice recording parts. When you finally get to the part where the star of the video appears, the cameraman can't seem to hold the camera still, misses catching the expression on the passenger's face and then seems to have a great need to induce vertigo and nausea in the viewer by flailing around on least three axii, often ending up so far away that the footage could be of almost any one who ever jumped. Show me a professional video of that special jump, and I'll give you $50, but price it at $200 and you'll be eating a lot more Ramen noodle dinners. Oh yeah, from a pilot's perspective on vidiots, don't stand 2 feet in front of a whirling propellor to try and stick your camera in the pilot's face, unless you want to be told to "GET THE FUCK AWAY FROM THAT PROPELLOR, MORON!" And don't edit that part into the final product either ... it appears to encourage more people to think its okay for them to wander around close to those spinny metal things, which are self clearing devices. I know a lot of busy tandem masters and vidiots making a living off doing that, but I won't be bringing most of them my friends and relatives. Snivel, bitch, rant, moan, etc. Zing Lurks