Slappie

GO ASTROS!!!!!!!!!!! 2 Up on the CUBS!! Just swept the Pirates!! Look out Cubs fans the STROS are on a terror!! I'm just a bit prejiduce I live in Houston Blue Skies!http://www.geocities.com/scollins77057/index.html

WoW! what a bummer Monday!! Let's all lighten up... Please.. Blue Skies!http://www.geocities.com/scollins77057/index.html

A little rabbit is happily running through the forest when he stumbles upon a giraffe rolling a joint. The rabbit looks at her and says, "Giraffe my friend, why do you do this? Come. Run with me through the forest! You'll feel so much better!" The giraffe looks at him, looks at the joint, tosses it and goes off running with the rabbit. Then they come across an elephant doing coke. So the rabbit again says, "Elephant my friend, why do you do this? Think about your health. Come. Run with us through the pretty forest, you'll see, you'll feel so good!" The elephant looks at them, looks at his razor, mirror and all, then tosses them and starts running with the rabbit and giraffe. The three animals then come across a lion about to shoot up... "Lion my friend, why do you do this? Think about your health! Come. Run with us through the sunny forest, you'll feel so good!" The lion looks at him, puts down his needle, and starts to beat the shit out of the little rabbit. As the giraffe and elephant watch in horror, they look at him and ask, "Lion, why did you do this? ... He was merely trying to help you. The lion answers, "That little fucker! He makes me run around the forest like a fucking idiot every time he's on ecstasy!" Blue Skies!http://www.geocities.com/scollins77057/index.html

Ok Ok! I'm amazed! You can jump from a plane but your going to chicken out on a belly ring? Blue Skies!http://www.geocities.com/scollins77057/index.html

61 Fun Things to do in a Jump Plane 1. Blow your nose and offer to show the contents of your kleenex to other passengers. 2. Grimace painfully while smacking your forehead and muttering: "Shut up, dammit, all of you just shut UP!" 3. Whistle the first seven notes of "It's a Small World" incessantly. 4. Sell Girl Scout cookies. 5. Beat out bongo rifts on your helmet. 6. Unzip your jumpsuit part way, and while peering inside ask: "Got enough air in there?" 7. One word: Flatulence! 8. Frown and mutter "gotta go, gotta go" then sigh and say "oops!" 9. Show other passengers a wound and ask if it looks infected. 10. Holler "Chutes away!" whenever the plane hits turbulence. 11. Walk on with a cooler that says "human head" on the side. 12. Stare at another passenger for a while, then announce "You're one of THEM!" and move to the far corner of the plane. 13. Ask each passenger getting on if you can pull their silver handle for them. 14. Wear a puppet on your hand and talk to other passengers "through" it. 15. Look around and ask "is that your dytter?" 16. Say "Announcing the Xth Floor!" each 1000'. 17. Listen to the plane walls with a stethoscope. 18. Draw a little square on the floor with chalk and announce to the other passengers that this is your "personal space." 19. Ask the jumper next to you, "If you burn in into a forest, does it make a sound?". 20. Take a bite of a sandwich and ask another passenger: "Wanna see wha in muh mouf?" 21. Announce in a demonic voice: "I must find a more suitable host body." 22. Make explosion noises. 23. Stare at your thumb and say "I think it's getting larger." 24. Sing "Row, Row, Row Your Boat" or "99 bottles of beer on the wall" in round. 25. After everyone has taken off their seatbelts, connect mismatching pairs in consideration of the next load. 26. Ask about the in-flight beverage choices, meal, and inflight movie. Insist that you were told a meal would be served when you purchased your ticket. 27. When jump run is announced, stand up and yell: "But I paid for a round trip ticket!" 28. Play "enie, menie, miny, moe" while pointing the shiny silver handles of nearby jumpers. 29. Hum Gregorian chants. 30. When someone is spotting, point toward the horizon and innocently ask "Is that Mexico?" 31. Moan, clutch your stomach, mutter "Oh damn, not motion sickness now." Then ask your neighbor if you can borrow his Factory Diver. 32. When boarding the plane ask if you can have emergency row seating. 33. After the first person exits, point out the door and exclaim "It's a bird, it's a plane, nah, just another f#$&in' toad." 34. Cough then mutter "Don't worry the doctor said it can only be spread through physical contact." 35. Pretend to pick lice out of your neighbors hair then eat them. 36. Theorize (incorrectly) on why airplanes and square parachutes actually fly. 37. Bow down and grovel before the local skygod. 38. Play rock, paper, scissors - if no one will join you, play against yourself using both hands. 39. Hand out labels that say "Plan B - Part 1" and "Plan B - Part 2" for everyone's cutaway and reserve handles. 40. Have the other jumpers get the attention of the jumper furthest from you then wave and smile broadly. 41. Turn to a student and say "Don't worry, the engine sounds _much_ better than it did yesterday." 42. Sing "Edelweiss". 43. Say to the jumper across from you, "All is in readiness, Comrade. This time we cannot fail!" 44. Pick your nose and then hold your finger up to another jumper and ask, "Booger?". 45. Tell the jumper next to you that skydiving is nothing compared the time when you were pinned down under a deadly hail of Jap fire. 46. Speak into your altimeter then hold it to your ear and nod your head. 47. Ask the other passengers in a thick German accent for their tickets. 48. Shift around as you sit and announce that thongs are overrated. 49. Talk about the parachute equipment you saw on the Home Shopping Channel. 50. Sing "Rawhide" as the plane accelerates to takeoff. 51. Start a petition demanding more altitude. 52. Repetitively ask, "Are we there yet?" 53. Tap furtively on the bulkhead and mutter, "Now where's that secret panel?" 54. Try to hypnotize the jumper across from you. 55. After you put your goggles on, act surprised, and say hello to the person across from you. 56. Give the jumper next to you a "Wet-Willy". 57. When the pilot announces jumprun advise the other jumpers to return their seats and tray tables to the full upright and locked position. 58. Bring your own joystick and pretend you're flying the plane. 59. Move your helmet past your neighbor's head and announce, "The Deathstar has cleared the planet". 60. According to the stories of one of the jet loads at Quincy a couple of years ago... 61. Solve quadratic equations aloud. Blue Skies!http://www.geocities.com/scollins77057/index.html

WooooooooooHoooooooooooooo no problem! I have a few lady friends who work at the clubs

Talk about sore!! My legs are so sore! I even stretched before my jumps.. Guess I need to get to the gym again [sad] oh Well Pammi I'm still proud of you and your landings. I have to admit tho, mine arent the greatest I'm flaring way to early and come in hard, but I'm coming in standing up.. My JM told me what I've read on here, "Wait till you can make out a blade of grass then flare nice and smooth and you should come in very nicely. Gunna try it this weekend if not this week! weather here in Houston is HOT but no rain or heavy winds in the forecast. Looking forward to some jumps during the week!

sunshine if you want strip clubs! Houston is the meca! We have more strip clubs and some of the finest ladies in the south! I'll put you up if you like so when you get too excited I can take care of you... I mean as in make sure you don't "over do it somehow" hehehehe Just let me know, you should come in for my graduation jump and then we can hit the strips! You buy of course! Blue Skies!http://www.geocities.com/scollins77057/index.html

To tell the truth I would much rather burn in at 120mph then die in some useless tragedy!! A cat bowl c'mon! Blue Skies!http://www.geocities.com/scollins77057/index.html

Congrats Pammi!!

I had posted this on another thread but it fits here too

Ok I'm celebrating the fact I was able to make 2 jumps Sat. I loved um both.. 1 was my AFP Lv 2 jump and my JM didn't have one thing to say about my form NOTHING, he actually told me that was the best Lv2 jump he has ever had and he has been an instructor for along time. Now 2 was my AFP Lv 3 jump!!! He released me and I ACED It tooooo!!! I am so proud of myself!! oh yea I'm still flaring way to early but I was able to land them both safe and standing!! On anohter note we need to congratulate Zennie!! He got both his Eagle and Double Eagle awards!! Great Day at the DZ I think!! Blue Skies!http://www.geocities.com/scollins77057/index.html

Oh My!! I'm not reading this stuff anymore!! heheheheheheh YeaH Right!! the posts rock & roll baybay! Blue Skies!http://www.geocities.com/scollins77057/index.html

Personaly I've been online in chat rooms and forums for over 6 years and you learnt o take everything with a grain of salt.. and for the Closed Captioning!! Dewd! that was alot of work to type... I'm to lazy to do that... Blue Skies!http://www.geocities.com/scollins77057/index.html

ok ok please offer a newbie "student" some advice... Where is this Boogie? I'm at a loss the only Monroe I know of is in Lousiana {No disrestect La folks} but I didn't think anyone in La knew how to jump from a plane! Boy I blew it this time!! climbs under his desk to hide, but as a Texan we don't give Lousiana residents any breaks}.... Blue Skies!http://www.geocities.com/scollins77057/index.html

I can't believe I'm doing this but I have to agree with Phreezone.. Learn the other OS's first Cisco or Novel are both good knowledge bases. Then mabye try some "linux" from home and use it to set up your "home network" MCSE is a good course and teaches alot. BUT the other certs pay way more money and think of the hours your going to spend in some piddly lil ISP or company IT Dept. working the 90hr week!!! DUDE get a grip.... Well other then that I think STUDYING will be your best bet oh and you can file this post under C:\noshit\sherlock folder if you wish... Blue Skies!http://www.geocities.com/scollins77057/index.html

The hair rocks baybay!!! Don't let the artistic morons bother you!!

Surely I woulda thought we'd have more posts on this thread.. Goodness I guess most of the Altitude lacking sex fiends are out trying to score either some "trim" or some "Sky" {Ladies "trim" was used in the most none offencive way, I hope} Blue Skies!http://www.geocities.com/scollins77057/index.html

ah shucks!! you made me blush Blue Skies!http://www.geocities.com/scollins77057/index.html

No not really.... Don't confuse "Confidence" with Conceit Truly I'm just kiddin around.... Blue Skies!http://www.geocities.com/scollins77057/index.html

I do tend to have that affect on the ladies.

I thought you were pickin up Jessica in D-Town? Blue Skies!http://www.geocities.com/scollins77057/index.html

It's kinda like this... I was really toasted one night in Austin. Fell into a fountain got drenched then I slipped off the curb on 6th street busted my forehead open stepped on a cops toe {good thing he was only workin as a bouncer} ect..... So basicly I was "Pickled" My friends started callin me SlapHappy it just kinda stuck with me for years. Now I guess I'm kinda attatched to it. Friends just call me "Slap" for short. Now on the other hand.. I've been known to slap some ass while doing the horizantal bop ermmmm.....nevermind, the rest.. We don't want to get the other DZ.comerz all excited!! You know how farkin easy that is! Blue Skies!http://www.geocities.com/scollins77057/index.html

I've got the BEER you bring the hotties and we'll have the SEX!! Blue Skies!http://www.geocities.com/scollins77057/index.html

*sings* Sometimes you feel like a "NUT" Sometimes you "DONT" Blue Skies!http://www.geocities.com/scollins77057/index.html