Slappie

I'm headed down too just not at the speed I had planned on... I agree on the forecast for SPL. I also know Steve!! He'll FLY if he can

Well for another 4 bucks you get 4500 more feet....Skydive Spaceland..Houston.. If your female you may get another 500 for free if you talk to the pilot the right way *wink* My New Website with 24hr Chat

Well for another 4 bucks you get 4500ft....Skydive Spaceland..Houston.. If your female you may get another 500 for free if you talk to the pilot the right way *wink* My New Website with 24hr Chat

Ok, I don't want to whine but I'm going to anyway! I swear if it's not one thing it's another. My alarm goes off this morning at 6:30am, I hit the snooze.... I roll outa bed and look around... something was strange, there was no sun light... IT'S SO DARK OUTSIDE!!! IT IS RAINING!!! I run to the tv and flip on the weather channel.... 60% chance of rain and a Flash Flood Watch Looks to me that all 60% of it's over me! So I sit here drinking coffee and wondering if I should drive to the DZ on the chance it may clear up this morning? Blue Skies for all of you that have good weather... My New Website with 24hr Chat

Congrats Justin! I'm so happy for you. When I grow up I may one day want to start a family.*omg* what did I just say!? Anyways I didn't think she would say quit skydiving, I was thinking this was her way of getting out of AFF Take care and be true to yourself Justin!!

I heard at the DZ this weekend the following "Bulls Law" All women are bi-sexual, it's just some are more comfortable with it then others. No Comment!!!! Had the whuffo next to me at the time and all she did was look at me funny...I

I've seen quite a few and heard some good ones. 1. Drive Fast, Take Chances, Pass on the Right and Talk Back to Cops!! 2. If a skydiver can't eat it, drink it or fuck it then they'll break it.. jessica help me here? 3. I'd much rather burn in at 120mph then die in some useless natrual distaster. I can't remember most of them... c'mon guys I know we can come up with some

Here is the latest weather forcast for Afganistan.... My New Website with 24hr Chat

Dear Tide, I'm writing to you to say what an excellent product you have. I've used it since my college days, when my mom told me it was the best. In fact, about a month ago, while at my girlfriends house, I spilled some red wine on my new white shirt. She started to berate me about my drinking problem. One thing lead to another and I had a lot of her blood on my white shirt, as well. I tried to get the stain out using her bargain detergent, but it wouldn't come out. On my way home, I stopped and got a bottle of liquid Tide and all of the stains came out. So well, in fact, that the DNA tests where negative!!!!. I thank you, once again, for a great product. I now have to write a letter to the Hefty bag people. Yours truly, Gary Condit My New Website with 24hr Chat

Ahem see picture! My New Website with 24hr Chat

I agree make it look cool and I may be interested. Post a picture of it so we can all see it. I do suggest you get HH's aproval first though. It is his website and stuff. just my .02 but I'd like to have one

A nun was sitting with her Mother Superior chatting. "I used some horrible language this week and feel absolutely terrible about it." "When did you use this awful language?" asks the elder. "Well, I was golfing and hit an incredible drive that looked like it was going to go over 280 yards, but it struck a phone line that is hanging over the fairway and fell straight down to the ground after going only about 100 yards." "Is that when you swore?" "No, Mother," says the nun. "After that, a squirrel ran out of the bushes and grabbed my ball in its mouth and began to run away." "Is THAT when you swore?" asks the Mother Superior again. "Well, no." says the nun. "You see, as the squirrel was running, an eagle came down out of the sky, grabbed the squirrel in his talons and began to fly away!" "Is THAT when you swore?" asks the amazed elder nun. "No, not yet. As the eagle carried the squirrel away in its claws, it flew near the green and the squirrel dropped my ball." "Did you swear THEN?" asked Mother Superior, becoming impatient. "No, because the ball fell on a big rock, bounced over the sand trap, rolled onto the green, and stopped about six inches from the hole." The two nuns were silent for a moment. Then Mother Superior sighed and said, "You missed the FUCKING putt, didn't you!" My New Website with 24hr Chat

GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT LIFE THAT LITTLE CHILDREN HAVE LEARNED: 1) No matter how hard you try, you can't baptize cats 2) When your mom is mad at your dad, don't let her brush your hair 3) If your sister hits you, don't hit her back. They always catch the second person 4) Never ask your 3-year old brother to hold a tomato. 5) You can't trust dogs to watch your food 6) Don't sneeze when someone is cutting your hair 7) Never hold a Dust-Buster and a cat at the same time 8) You can't hide a piece of broccoli in a glass of milk 9) Don't wear polka-dot underwear under white shorts 10) The best place to be when you're sad is grandpa's lap GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT LIFE THAT ADULTS HAVE LEARNED 1) Raising teenagers is like nailing Jell-O to a tree 2) Wrinkles don't hurt 3) Families are like fudge, mostly sweet but a few nuts 4) Today's mighty oak is just yesterday's nut that held it's ground 5) Laughing is good exercise. It's like jogging on the inside 6) Middle age is when you choose your cereal for the fiber, not the toy GREAT TRUTHS ABOUT GROWING OLD 1) Growing old is mandatory, growing up is optional 2) Forget the health food. I need all the preservatives I can get 3) When you fall down, you wonder what else you can do while you're down there 4) You're getting old when you get the same sensation from a rocking chair that you once got from a roller coaster 5) It's frustrating when you know all the answers, but nobody bothers to ask you the questions 6) Time may be a great healer, but its a lousy beautician 7) Wisdom comes with age, but sometime age comes alone THE FOUR STAGES OF LIFE 1) You believe in Santa Claus 2) You don't believe in Santa Claus 3) You are Santa Claus 4) You look like Santa Claus My New Website with 24hr Chat

Whoa!!!! I'm freaked out!! My New Website with 24hr Chat

While visiting England, George Bush is invited to tea with the Queen. He asks her what her leadership philosophy is. She says that it is to surround herself with intelligent people. He asks how she knows if they're intelligent. "I do so by asking them the right questions," says the Queen. "Allow me to demonstrate." She phones Tony Blair and says, "Mr. Prime Minister. Please answer this question: Your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or sister. Who is it?" Tony Blair responds, "It's me, ma'am." "Correct. Thank you and good-bye, sir," says the Queen. She hangs up and says, "Did you get that, Mr. Bush?" "Yes ma'am. Thanks a lot. I'll definitely be using that!" Upon returning to Washington, he decides he'd better put the Chairman of the Senate Foreign Relations Committee to the test. He summons Jesse Helms to the White House and says, "Senator Helms, I wonder if you can answer a question for me." "Why, of course, sir. What's on your mind?" "Uhh, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or your sister. Who is it?" Helms hems and haws and finally asks, "Can I think about it and get back to you?" Bush agrees, and Helms leaves. Helms immediately calls a meeting of other senior Republican senators, and they puzzle over the question for several hours, but nobody can come up with an answer. Finally, in desperation, Helms calls Colin Powell at the State Department and explains his problem. "Now lookee here, son, your mother has a child, and your father has a child, and this child is not your brother or your sister. Who is it?" Powell answers immediately, "It's me, of course, you dumb cracker." Much relieved, Helms rushes back to the White House and exclaims, "I know the answer, sir! I know who it is! It's Colin Powell!" And Bush replies in disgust, "Wrong, it's Tony Blair." My New Website with 24hr Chat

We've got Proof now. Check out the picture. My New Website with 24hr Chat

The audio is a bit broken up.... just figured it was the digitape.... My New Website with 24hr Chat

If I were President George W. Bush's Speech Writer. "Good evening my fellow Americans." "First, I want to pass on my condolences to the people of New York and all Americans that are hurting in this tragic time. You can rest assured that anything and everything that can be done to assure the safety of our country will be done. This is the greatest country in the world and we will get through this trying time. Now is the time for all people to set aside our petty differences and show the world that no one or nothing can destroy the fortitude of the American people. To the people responsible for today's tragedy, I say this: Are you fucking kidding me? Are the turbans on your heads wrapped too fucking tight? Have you gone too long without a bath? Do you not know who you are dealing with? Americans are so hungry to kill, that we shoot at each other every day. We will relish that opportunity for new targets for our aggression. Have you forgotten history? What happened to the last people that started jacking around with us? Remember the little yellow bastards over in Japan? We slapped them all over the Pacific and roasted about 2 million of them in their own back yard. That's what we in America call a big ass barbecue. Ever seen Texas on a map? Ever wonder why it's so big? Because we wanted it that way, Mexico started jacking around with the Alamo and now they cut our lawns. England? We sent them packing with their red coats and tea. Ask your buddy Saddam about starting shit with the good 'ole USA. The only reason he got away the first time is because it's too hard to shoot someone when you're doubled over laughing at them. Our soldiers aren't trained to laugh and shoot at the same time. Now he couldn't stop a pack of cub scouts from taking over his shitty little country. Trust us, Afghanistan will end up a giant kitty litter box. Go ahead and try to hide, Bin Laden. There's not a hole deep enough or a mountain high enough that's going to keep your camel riding asses safe. We will bomb every inch of the country that harbors him, his camps and any place that looks and even smells like he was there. Hell, we might even drop a few bombs on people that have pissed us off in the past. This is America. We kick ass. This is what we do. Go ahead and laugh now, but the Tomahawks are coming and we will smoke your sorry asses. God bless America!" My New Website with 24hr Chat

File Not Found (Error 404) Sorry, the web page or file that you requested was not found on this server. Please check that you typed the URL correctly. If you are following a link, then you may wish to notify the web page's author that it is invalid. My New Website with 24hr Chat

Ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhh gawwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwwd!!!!!!!!!!!!! That was just tooooooooooo funny!!!!! Please give us some ALTITUDE SOON!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! LMFAO

I cross posted this one because I want everyone to see it.... I agree with skybytch too!! Let's support our DZ's and Keep the Sport Alive!! I think it's time to email our congressmen and women and let them know what they/FAA and everyone else involved is doing to the small business owners of DZ's the employees and the economy. We as skydivers pump about $200 to $300 a month each into the local economies. Now multiply that by the USPA members. I have found a site where if you do not know how to contact your Rep or don't know who it is it can tell you... http://www.visi.com/juan/congress/ I for one believe it is time we stood up for ourselves and let our voice be known as one. Our friends who own and work at the DZ's we love to jump at our losing their ass and some will probably never recover. Just look at what this grounding did to the Airline industry. Airlines are cutting flights laying of tens of thousands of people. We can not let this ruin our country and the freedom we take for granted. This is basicly my opinion but that's what makes this country great. Yes it's going to make another piece of paper someone in the Congressmans office will have to look at. If it even gets to your reps hands. I beleive if enough are sent they will look and see. Remember when you were a whuffo, did you even realise how many people loved our sport? Probably not, because I know I didn't.... Now I know too well.... People let's make them know we are a large intelligent voting block in this country... I believe the only reason the FAA has security risks attatched to the GA VFR is because some of the terrorists went to small flight schools and had access to small VFR planes. Enough of my .02$ My New Website with 24hr Chat My New Website with 24hr Chat

I think it's time to email our congressmen and women and let them know what they/FAA and everyone else involved is doing to the small business owners of DZ's the employees and the economy. We as skydivers pump about $200 to $300 a month each into the local economies. Now multiply that by the USPA members. I have found a site where if you do not know how to contact your Rep or don't know who it is it can tell you... http://www.visi.com/juan/congress/ I for one believe it is time we stood up for ourselves and let our voice be known as one. Our friends who own and work at the DZ's we love to jump at our losing their ass and some will probably never recover. Just look at what this grounding did to the Airline industry. Airlines are cutting flights laying of tens of thousands of people. We can not let this ruin our country and the freedom we take for granted. This is basicly my opinion but that's what makes this country great. Yes it's going to make another piece of paper someone in the Congressmans office will have to look at. If it even gets to your reps hands. I beleive if enough are sent they will look and see. Remember when you were a whuffo, did you even realise how many people loved our sport? Probably not, because I know I didn't.... Now I know too well.... People let's make them know we are a large intelligent voting block in this country... I believe the only reason the FAA has security risks attatched to the GA VFR is because some of the terrorists went to small flight schools and had access to small VFR planes. Enough of my .02$ My New Website with 24hr Chat

It doesn't help! It actually makes less sence.....

I touched AirAnn's ass lastnight!!!!

I was in my truck mindlessly driving through the Houston traffic listening to the radio trying to sift through what I had to do that day. Then the news came on and they announced a plane had run into the WTC. They made a joke about what an f*ckn moron the pilot was because one of the DJ had flown his cessna into Mexico and crashed and taken to jail as a arms smuggler. My second thought was that some private pilot in a Cessna had screwed up and hit the bulding. I still had about 20 minutes left to work and then they interupted a song and said that another plane had hit the WTC! That's when my heart sank and I thought OMG! Not again! I trudged onto work not really feeling any emotions yet. Just an utter blank stare basicaly. Some of my co-workers have tv's in their offices to catch the news ect... lunch time. I remember all of us huddled around a lil 9 inch b&w screen watching it all unfold! The women were sobbing the men mumbling about Ben Laden...and bombs and guns and skinning alive then pouring salt in the wounds!! I went to my office and sat there for what seemed like 30 minutes thinking about all of it. I switched on my radio and was listening to ABC Radio Network. When I heard about the Pentagon. Tried to get to new sites to find out up to date news, couldn't log onto any of them. So I came to DZ.com and read the threads. Some of the regulars and non-regular posters came to me chat and we sat there trading info and news for a few hours. Then the Company Officers told us all to go home and get with out kids and families. I went to my family {Local Bar} and sat there just watching the news and feeling such utter and total loss of control of my life! Since Tuesday Sept 11th, I've gone through the gambit of emotions, anger, hate, frustration, emptiness, loss ect... I'm sure you've all felt the same as me. Right now I'm trying to continue on with life as normal as it can be. Trying to refrain from watching the media and news. I'm totaly blanking myself out of it. I keep up with what's going on. I'm just tierd of being bombarded with tradgedy and feelings of loss..... I pray for all of you that have been touched by this terrible attack on the very fibre of the United States of America. May we all become stronger from this and stop the hate and killing....... My New Website with 24hr Chat