Ordering a Pizza

[TomAiello 25]

This is just the kind of fear mongering scare tactics we've come to expect from those paranoid, tin foil hat wearing, right wing conspiracy theorists at the....ACLU.

-- Tom Aiello

[email protected]
SnakeRiverBASE.com

[DrewEckhardt 0]

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This is just the kind of fear mongering scare tactics we've come to expect from those paranoid, tin foil hat wearing right wing conspiracy theorists at the....ACLU.

ESPECIALLY now that health care is becoming nationalized.

I don't want the government sending me to a concentration camp for fatties because I like to eat more deep dish pizzas than I should.

[downwardspiral 0]

Ever wonder about those grocery store club cards?

www.FourWheelerHB.com

[TomAiello 25]

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Ever wonder about those grocery store club cards?

I don't really wonder--I know.

If you tell them you're in a hurry, they'll give you a card stuck to a form to fill out and send in. Then you can get the benefits of the card (coupon savings, etc) without ever filling out the form and sending it back, so that you can stay out of their database.

-- Tom Aiello

[email protected]
SnakeRiverBASE.com

[wolfriverjoe 1,341]

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Ever wonder about those grocery store club cards?

A little. but considering they haven't used any of my information to direct market me.

I use a different middle initial on the applications for these kind of things to see who sells my information to whom.

Somewhere I had heard that the stores really don't care who you are, you are just a number to them. They do care about your buying habits and trends.

"There are NO situations which do not call for a French Maid outfit." Lucky McSwervy

"~ya don't GET old by being weak & stupid!" - Airtwardo

[quade 3]

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Ever wonder about those grocery store club cards?

Meh. They don't really give a crap about you personally. They don't care whether or not you buy porn or cup cakes.

What they do care about is that you're in a particular demographic and what the buying trends of that demographic are. They then resell that batch of demographic data back to companies like a rating system.

At some point, yes, they will care about you as an individual so they can target in-store ads to you, but for now they simply don't have the technology to do what companies like iTunes and Amazon can do on the internet with cookies for tracking individuals to serve them up ads.

quade -
The World's Most Boring Skydiver

[downwardspiral 0]

heh....why am I not surprised you think I don't know what they're used for?

www.FourWheelerHB.com

[quade 3]

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heh....why am I not surprised you think I don't know what they're used for?

Well, you did ask the question! However, I sort of assumed you knew, but was almost certain there were a few folks out there, let's call them the paranoid types, that might think they're already being "tracked by the man."

quade -
The World's Most Boring Skydiver

[Armour666 0]

it is a bit extream but do a search for people that have had their AMEX cards limits greatly reduced because where they shopped. This happened because apparently certain place that people commonly shopped had a higher default rate so that means Any one who shopped their had their rates cut.

How about the couple of kids that created a fictitious Friend to get an extra free ice cream as part of a birthday club. The many years latter a letter for the made up friend arrived from selective service arrived.

Thats only to exampls that quickly jump to mind from the many more out there.

The flash video that been floating around on the Internet for a couple years now is far fetched but companies are trying.

SO this one time at band camp.....

"Of all the things I've lost I miss my mind the most."

[PLFXpert 0]

It's funny.

Was also funny when I first saw it several years ago.

Paint me in a corner, but my color comes back.

[billvon 2,400]

>it is a bit extream but do a search for people that have had their AMEX
>cards limits greatly reduced because where they shopped.

It's not uncommon at all. People have their credit limits increased or reduced for a lot of reasons - their payment history, their shopping patterns, the amount of money that goes through their card, their income, where they live and who holds their mortgages. (i.e. if you have a massively topheavy subprime mortgage, you may be a higher credit risk.)

>How about the couple of kids that created a fictitious Friend to get an extra
>free ice cream as part of a birthday club. The many years latter a letter for the
>made up friend arrived from selective service arrived.

We did that in college. Gene Smith got a lot of junk mail from all kinds of places.

[rehmwa 2]

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heh....why am I not surprised you think I don't know what they're used for?

Well, you did ask the question! However, I sort of assumed you knew, but was almost certain there were a few folks out there, let's call them the paranoid types, that might think they're already being "tracked by the man."

If you've ever handled a penny the gov'ment has your DNA.

A single dollar and they are tracking you.

...
Driving is a one dimensional activity - a monkey can do it - being proud of your driving abilities is like being proud of being able to put on pants

[rehmwa 2]

...
Driving is a one dimensional activity - a monkey can do it - being proud of your driving abilities is like being proud of being able to put on pants

[rushmc 18]

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Man, you crack yourself up!!!!

"America will never be destroyed from the outside,
if we falter and lose our freedoms,
it will be because we destroyed ourselves."
Abraham Lincoln

[TomAiello 25]

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We did that in college. Gene Smith got a lot of junk mail from all kinds of places.

I've been getting "Friends of the National Parks" junk mail for Carl Boenish for some time now. I guess the NPS sells the names of people who take out wilderness permits in Yosemite.

-- Tom Aiello

[email protected]
SnakeRiverBASE.com

[councilman24 36]

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it is a bit extream but do a search for people that have had their AMEX cards limits greatly reduced because where they shopped. This happened because apparently certain place that people commonly shopped had a higher default rate so that means Any one who shopped their had their rates cut.

And the issue is? It's a private contract. If you don't like the terms don't sign up. OF COURSE they know where you shop. They have to pay them. And if it makes you a bad risk for default, statitically, I'd lower you limit too. It's called business.

I'm old for my age.
Terry Urban
D-8631
FAA DPRE

[pirana 0]

(Telephone ringing)

PERSON ANSWERING: Hello?

CALLER: Yeah, I'd like to order a pepperoni pizza.

PERSON ANSWERING: You must have the wrong number, I spell my name . . . Danger.

OK OK, totally irrelevamt post - but it fired some synapse that executed a Firesign Theatre memory.

" . . . the lust for power can be just as completely satisfied by suggesting people into loving their servitude as by flogging them and kicking them into obedience." -- Aldous Huxley

[kallend 1,625]

- Jeremy Clarkson, Sunday Times 04 October

Like any responsible parent, I would not leave a loaded gun in the children’s playroom or keep my painkillers in their sweetie tin. But it turns out that for two years there has been a nuclear bomb in one of my kitchen cupboards, between the tomato ketchup and the Rice Krispies.

It’s an American chilli sauce that was bought by my wife as a joky Christmas present. And, like all joky Christmas presents, it was put in a drawer and forgotten about. It’s called limited-edition Insanity private reserve and it came in a little wooden box, along with various warning notices. “Use this product one drop at a time,” it said. “Keep away from eyes, pets and children. Not for people with heart or respiratory problems. Use extreme caution.”

Unfortunately, we live in a world where everything comes with a warning notice. Railings. Vacuum cleaners. Energy drinks. My quad bike has so many stickers warning me of decapitation, death and impalement that they become a nonsensical blur.

The result is simple. We know these labels are drawn up to protect the manufacturer legally, should you decide one day to insert a vacuum-cleaner pipe up your bottom, or to try to remove your eye with a teaspoon. So we ignore them. They are meaningless. One drop at a time! Use extreme caution! On a sauce. Pah. Plainly it was just American lawyer twaddle.

I like a hot sauce. My bloody marys are known to cure squints. And at an Indian restaurant I will often order a vindaloo, sometimes without the involvement of a wager. So when I accidentally found that bottle of Insanity, I poured maybe half a teaspoonful onto my paella. And tucked in.

Burns victims often say that when they are actually on fire, there is no pain. It has something to do with the body pumping out adrenaline in such vast quantities that the nerve endings stop working. Well, it wasn’t like that for me.

The pain started out mildly, but I knew from past experience that this would build to a delightful fiery sensation. I was even looking forward to it. But the moment soon passed. In a matter of seconds I was in agony. After maybe a minute I was frightened that I might die. After five I was frightened that I might not.

The searing fire had surged throughout my head. My eyes were streaming. Molten lava was flooding out of my nose. My mouth was a shattered ruin. Even my hair hurt.

And all the time, I was thinking: “If it’s doing this to my head, what in the name of all that's holy is it doing to my innards?” I felt certain that at any moment my stomach would open and everything — my intestines, my liver, my heart, even — would simply splosh onto the floor. This is not an exaggeration. I really did think I was dissolving from the inside out.

Trying to keep calm, I raced, screaming, for the fridge and ate handfuls of crushed ice. This made everything worse. So, dimly remembering that Indians use bread when they've overdone the chillies, I cut a slice, threw it away and ate what remained of the very expensive Daylesford loaf, like a dog.

Nothing was working. And such was my desperation, I downed two litres of skimmed milk — something I would never normally touch with a barge pole. I was sweating profusely as my body frenziedly sought to realign its internal thermostat. I felt sick but didn’t dare regurgitate the poison for fear of the damage it would cause on the way out.

Even now, the following morning, I feel weak, shell-shocked, like I may die at any moment. And all I’d ingested was a drop.

Limited-edition Insanity sauce is ridiculous. It’s made in Costa Rica, from hot pepper extract, crushed red savina peppers, red tabasco pepper pulp, green tabasco pepper pulp, crushed red habanero peppers, crushed green habanero peppers, red habanero pepper powder and fruit juice.

Well, that’s what it says on the tin. But I don’t believe it. I think it’s made from uranium, plutonium, fertiliser, sulphuric acid, nitric acid, hydrochloric acid and ammonia, with a splash of mace. I do not believe it’s a foodstuff. It’s a weapon.

And I may have a point, since on the Scoville scale, which measures the intensity of chilli peppers, the habanero sits just below the “daisy cutter”, that American bomb designed to wipe out nations.

At present you are allowed to take 100ml of liquid onto a plane because the authorities believe such a small amount could not possibly bring down an airliner. They are wrong. If I painted just 1ml of Insanity sauce on the window of a 747, it would melt. And this is stuff you can buy on the internet. Stuff that has been sitting in my kitchen for two years.

So, what’s to be done? As you know, I am not Gordon Brown. I do not think problems can be solved with a ban, even though I really believe that a bottle of Insanity sauce is more deadly than a machinegun.

The obvious course of action is to remove warning notices from household goods that are not dangerous — cakes, for instance, and staplers. This way, we would pay more attention when something is supplied with labels advising us of great peril ahead.

Sadly, however, since we are now one of the most litigious countries in the world, this will never happen. Nor can Insanity be uninvented. It exists. A bottle of the damn stuff is sitting on my desk now and I have no idea what I should do with it.

I can’t pour it down the sink because it would get into the water table. I can’t put it in the bin because it would end up as landfill. And that’s no good for something which has a half-life of several thousand years. I can’t even take it — as I would with a grenade I’d found — to the police because they’d be tempted to use it as a legal device for getting information out of criminals. And that wouldn’t work at all. Last night, when the bread had failed and the milk was finished, I would happily have confessed to 43 counts of homosexual rape. Plus there is a side effect — certain death.

...

The only sure way to survive a canopy collision is not to have one.

[TomAiello 25]

Huh? How is that related?

-- Tom Aiello

[email protected]
SnakeRiverBASE.com

[kallend 1,625]

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Huh? How is that related?

Food and culinary topics.

...

The only sure way to survive a canopy collision is not to have one.

[quade 3]

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Huh? How is that related?

Wait! Wait! You're looking for something to make sense here?

quade -
The World's Most Boring Skydiver

[billvon 2,400]

>How is that related?

Both are dumb but funny stories about food.

[wolfriverjoe 1,341]

Dave's Insanity is the hottest stuff out there.

This account is actually pretty close to what can happen.
I have seen people with a high tolerance for "hot" puke after trying too much.

But it really doesn't have any real taste, it's all heat.

I like the Tabasco Chipotle a lot better.

"There are NO situations which do not call for a French Maid outfit." Lucky McSwervy

"~ya don't GET old by being weak & stupid!" - Airtwardo