RoadRash 0 #26 April 13, 2004 QuoteHave we done our "Who's yer monkey?!" routine for you yet? _Pm Ok...I'm scared...Do I want to know?!?! ~R+R~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~ Fly the friendly skies...^_^...})ii({...^_~... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Casch 0 #27 April 13, 2004 It sounds like you have placed your heart in the hands of another, several times. Everyone places their heart in the wrong hands from time to time. It's part of life. What matters are the moments in between heartache. That light hearted feeling you get when you are happy with someone. Going to bed with a smile on your face that you can't seem to get rid of, and don't want to. There are no formulas to make love work, because there are no constants. The most important thing is to get up and try again. There's a well known phrase, "Love like your heart has never been broken", or something like that. Remember that phrase everytime you get close to someone. And never give up on love, eventually you will find the person you want to spend your life with, and who wants to spend their life with you. Someone who doesn't care that you sqeeze the toothepaste from the middle of the tube, someone who will laugh if you let one rip by mistake She's out there, there are many of them out there. It just takes some trial and error to find her. But hey, what do I know...I'm only 19 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #28 April 13, 2004 QuoteBeing able to let go of past hurts, baggage An interesting balance. The definition of "baggage" is most carefully debated. If you fail to learn from bad events, they will probably occur again. Failure to learn is pretty painful. However, generalizing that all of your future prospects have the same flaw of your ex will only poison your future relationships. Is it knowledge or baggage? Is it cynicism or realism? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lovelife22 0 #29 April 13, 2004 QuoteQuoteBeing able to let go of past hurts, baggage, and willing to give yourself fully to someone who gives back without reproach The problem is most people dont deal with these things, they just run ahead and drop them. Only to have them slowly manifest in the minds and in there souls, causing them become heavier and heavier, and have major self issues.... Taking the time and allowing your self to morn is a good thing. Not doing that just makes matters worse in the long run, i know cause i tried that once, and i'm still recovering from the damage. Yup! 100% agree. Taking time is absolutely critical before you are able to love agian. It's knowing and recognizing that. And its the recovery period where you find the most "gems". Where we learn about ourselves, our character, etc. Feeling pain is a good thing, Just as long as you let go when the time is right.. letting go, can bring amazing opportunities in all facets of life. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Paige 0 #30 April 13, 2004 QuoteLove is UNCONDIONAL! Being able to let go of past hurts, baggage, and willing to give yourself fully to someone who gives back without reproach...it IS out there. Patience, time, going through heartache, will all bring you closer to your "True companion". Be yourself...love yourself...and that real amazing powerful love will come. Exactly. Patience is a virtue for a reason. I'm assuming one day my kindness, love, and affection for another will pay off. Until that day, I'll be jumpin and havin a grand old timeTunnel Pink Mafia Delegate www.TunnelPinkMafia.com Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Orchid 0 #31 April 13, 2004 You know...love works in mysterious/funny ways...when we chase, they run...when you decide to let go, they'll come back. My heart have been broken a few times...so I know how it feels. Everyone is entitles to wish & dream, but to make a wish becomes reality....that's ones' will, take it to heart that at the end....you've done you're best in a given situation. Love is so unique for different people or at different times that nothing of general importance and description can be said about it. Though love is a variety of things: can be described in specific, accurate, logical, non-mystical and non-mythical prose which will make reflection, decision, and discussion of love easier and clearer, this will not thereby make love seem prosaic. Someone once say to me: hearts are meant to be broken...not just to breath or keep us alive, it is how you pick up the pieces and put it back together...it is one's will."Love is doing small things with great love." Lacrosse: Legally beating men with sticks since 1492 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites wendybird 0 #32 April 13, 2004 Love (as well as happiness) is an inside job. If you don't love yourself, you're not capable of loving anyone else. On the other hand, we cannot continue to keep giving and giving of our love, and not have it returned in the same spirit it was given (I am speaking solely in the context of a partner relationship). You're absolutely right. Your world can come tumbling down around you. Sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. Sometimes we can even allow it to happen. It's then up to us to decide to pick up the pieces, learn what we can, and move on. Playing the victim is never an option. No one else can "make" you happy.Wendy "Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used u Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Rainbo 0 #33 April 13, 2004 I am not a victim, I just feel a loss. I am entightled to feelings. I have never insinuated that I am not happy with myself, or that I can't bring happiness to those around me because of who I am inside. I do not love myself in a vain sense, but I do have feelings of pride in the things that I have accomplished in my life. These things may not mean much to other people but to me they are my life, so yes I do love myself in that aspect. My fragile pieces will one day come together, because I want them to, as they have so often in my past. No I am not a victim, but I do feel a loss. Iam not hurt, but I do feel pain. I am not alone, and I am alone. I can see the future, even though the lights are out.Rainbo TheSpeedTriple - Speed is everything "Blessed are those who can give without remembering, and take without forgetting." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites scottjaco 0 #34 April 13, 2004 QuoteI guess I am destined to never really know or even find the person who can help me figure it out. Not everybody is suppose to find this perceived "true love". Falling in love, getting married, having kids and living happily ever after. That may be OK for some but think about where the world would be if everyone took this path? There would be no progress, nothing achieved. I doubt you would have had the balls to learn how to skydive if you were busy trying to fall in love. Think about how fulfilling your life became when you made these less conventional choices. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites skybytch 259 #35 April 14, 2004 QuoteNo I am not a victim, but I do feel a loss. Iam not hurt, but I do feel pain. I am not alone, and I am alone. I can see the future, even though the lights are out. Thanks, Kevin. Powerful words there, not only for those hurting because of love but also for those dealing with other life issues. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites freeflir29 0 #36 April 14, 2004 Quotewhat's love all about? A case of Rolling Rock and hot chicks that are easy. Disclaimer: I have fairly simple needs though. In fact....toss in a hot tub and I have found Shangri-La. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites sunshine 2 #37 April 14, 2004 QuoteNo I am not a victim, but I do feel a loss. Iam not hurt, but I do feel pain. I am not alone, and I am alone. I can see the future, even though the lights are out. --------------------------------------------------------------- Thanks, Kevin. Powerful words there, not only for those hurting because of love but also for those dealing with other life issues. I kinda like that quote too. That rainbo is a smart guy. I'm honored to have him as my friend. ___________________________________________ meow I get a Mike hug! I get a Mike hug! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Rainbo 0 #38 April 14, 2004 Rainbo TheSpeedTriple - Speed is everything "Blessed are those who can give without remembering, and take without forgetting." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites dzdiva 7 #39 April 14, 2004 Not sure if this helps, but I found this a long time ago. I put it away, but have pulled it out from my dusty journals to once again remind myself. "To love, you must forgive yourself. If you're like me, you may forget your own telephone number, but you have an unfailing memory for your past mistakes. We compound this when we allow these memories to cloud the present. There are parents, for instance, who burden themselves with a lifetime of guilt for the mistakes they feel they made in bringing up their children. There are those who have made poor decisions in work, social, and personal situations and have pounded their chests raw with contrition. At one time or another, we all need forgiveness of others, but equally important is the forgiveness we owe ourselves. Love is not about keeping old wounds open, it is about healing them. It is about moving forward and getting on with life." -Leo Buscaglia Hugs and peace to all those who have found and lost love."It's not just a daydream if you choose to make it your life..." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites ChasingBlueSky 0 #40 April 14, 2004 Rainbo, I've lost count of how many long conversations you and I have had since I first met you...somehow it always seems that a skydiving talk worked its way into a discussion about life. You have lived a very full life so far, more than most at twice you age - you have told me lots of good and bad that has happened to you, yet you are one of the most balanced people I know. You try to keep a positive mind (even when Henry and Roger passed away), and you always put being a Dad first and foremost (despite how hard some people make that on you). In those kids alone I think you know the true definition of love and sacrifice. Life, just like skydiving, is always at the learning stage...we are forever students. Take what you have learned so far with the pain you now have and find the lesson to be learned. Just from talking to you last weekend I know you are willing to take the time to be single and heal...and to get comfortable with being yourself again. It would be a massive mistake to rush into anything, going from relationship to relationship without hitting the reset button. If you didn't take this break, who you are would get lost along the way and any relationship you entered into would only fall apart without the full strength of your own personality. On top of that, you have your kids - be a good role model to them and show them the correct way to handle loss, and to show them its ok to be happy and single. They will take your lead later in life, and the better you handle this now, the easier it will be for them to find love later in life. They already know what it means to be loved from you - now show them how to give your love to someone else....so wait and find the right person.....or never find that person and still be happy. You have your kids, and you have your friends. In my book that makes you a very loved man. I'm glad to have you as a friend._________________________________________ you can burn the land and boil the sea, but you can't take the sky from me.... I WILL fly again..... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Gawain 0 #41 April 14, 2004 Quote ...figure it out. Not to pee in anyone's corn-flakes, but anyone that tells you they've figured it out has less of a clue than you do (IMO). I have no idea what it's about. Maybe I was close once...So I try and I scream and I beg and I sigh Just to prove I'm alive, and it's alright 'Cause tonight there's a way I'll make light of my treacherous life Make light! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Aviatrr 0 #42 April 14, 2004 Dude, true love is overrated.. I've experienced it twice in my life......and I think I've experienced it one more time than anybody is ever meant to...and both times it ended in disaster. Fuck it. If you're having fun, forget about "love"...if it's meant to happen, it will....otherwise enjoy lust and don't worry about anything else. Mike Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Luv2Fall 0 #43 April 16, 2004 When love beckons to you follow him, Though his ways are hard and steep. And when his wings enfold you yield to him, Though the sword hidden among his pinions May wound you. And when he speaks to you believe in him, Though his voice may shatter your dreams As the north wind lays waste the garden. For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you. Even as he is for your growth So is he for your pruning. The Prophet by Gibran Khalil Gibran Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites WrongWay 0 #44 April 16, 2004 Quote The one thing I have figured out is that what can make some people feel that they are on top of the world can basically destroy another persons world. This can be true even if that was not the intent. You're exactly right. You can give someone all you have, be the one they've always waited for, be their everything. But some people can't handle a good relationship, whether it be caused by scarring from previous relationships, not being used be being "tied down" from being single for so long, hard relationships with friends or parents, it could be anything. Some people just refuse to recognize a good thing when they see it, and they run. I personally believe that it's a very sad thing, because these people generally end up alone, wishing they'd not left that single wonderful person, and they can have all they want from life but no one to share it with. I can see that you're not like that. You obviously believe in love and good relationships, but you seem frustrated that one or more have not worked out when you thought they would. This is normal, and will pass with time. Somewhere there is a person for you, someone who will appreciate all you have to offer and won't be frightened by it. Just take your time. Don't look for it, it will find you. Good luck bro. Wrong Way D #27371 Mal Manera Rodriguez Cajun Chicken Ø Hellfish #451 The wiser wolf prevails. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Prev 1 2 Next Page 2 of 2 Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Reply to this topic... × Pasted as rich text. Paste as plain text instead Only 75 emoji are allowed. × Your link has been automatically embedded. 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Paige 0 #30 April 13, 2004 QuoteLove is UNCONDIONAL! Being able to let go of past hurts, baggage, and willing to give yourself fully to someone who gives back without reproach...it IS out there. Patience, time, going through heartache, will all bring you closer to your "True companion". Be yourself...love yourself...and that real amazing powerful love will come. Exactly. Patience is a virtue for a reason. I'm assuming one day my kindness, love, and affection for another will pay off. Until that day, I'll be jumpin and havin a grand old timeTunnel Pink Mafia Delegate www.TunnelPinkMafia.com Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Orchid 0 #31 April 13, 2004 You know...love works in mysterious/funny ways...when we chase, they run...when you decide to let go, they'll come back. My heart have been broken a few times...so I know how it feels. Everyone is entitles to wish & dream, but to make a wish becomes reality....that's ones' will, take it to heart that at the end....you've done you're best in a given situation. Love is so unique for different people or at different times that nothing of general importance and description can be said about it. Though love is a variety of things: can be described in specific, accurate, logical, non-mystical and non-mythical prose which will make reflection, decision, and discussion of love easier and clearer, this will not thereby make love seem prosaic. Someone once say to me: hearts are meant to be broken...not just to breath or keep us alive, it is how you pick up the pieces and put it back together...it is one's will."Love is doing small things with great love." Lacrosse: Legally beating men with sticks since 1492 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wendybird 0 #32 April 13, 2004 Love (as well as happiness) is an inside job. If you don't love yourself, you're not capable of loving anyone else. On the other hand, we cannot continue to keep giving and giving of our love, and not have it returned in the same spirit it was given (I am speaking solely in the context of a partner relationship). You're absolutely right. Your world can come tumbling down around you. Sometimes quickly, sometimes slowly. Sometimes we can even allow it to happen. It's then up to us to decide to pick up the pieces, learn what we can, and move on. Playing the victim is never an option. No one else can "make" you happy.Wendy "Life is not a journey to the grave with the intention of arriving safely in a pretty and well preserved body, but rather to skid in broadside, thoroughly used u Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rainbo 0 #33 April 13, 2004 I am not a victim, I just feel a loss. I am entightled to feelings. I have never insinuated that I am not happy with myself, or that I can't bring happiness to those around me because of who I am inside. I do not love myself in a vain sense, but I do have feelings of pride in the things that I have accomplished in my life. These things may not mean much to other people but to me they are my life, so yes I do love myself in that aspect. My fragile pieces will one day come together, because I want them to, as they have so often in my past. No I am not a victim, but I do feel a loss. Iam not hurt, but I do feel pain. I am not alone, and I am alone. I can see the future, even though the lights are out.Rainbo TheSpeedTriple - Speed is everything "Blessed are those who can give without remembering, and take without forgetting." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
scottjaco 0 #34 April 13, 2004 QuoteI guess I am destined to never really know or even find the person who can help me figure it out. Not everybody is suppose to find this perceived "true love". Falling in love, getting married, having kids and living happily ever after. That may be OK for some but think about where the world would be if everyone took this path? There would be no progress, nothing achieved. I doubt you would have had the balls to learn how to skydive if you were busy trying to fall in love. Think about how fulfilling your life became when you made these less conventional choices. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skybytch 259 #35 April 14, 2004 QuoteNo I am not a victim, but I do feel a loss. Iam not hurt, but I do feel pain. I am not alone, and I am alone. I can see the future, even though the lights are out. Thanks, Kevin. Powerful words there, not only for those hurting because of love but also for those dealing with other life issues. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflir29 0 #36 April 14, 2004 Quotewhat's love all about? A case of Rolling Rock and hot chicks that are easy. Disclaimer: I have fairly simple needs though. In fact....toss in a hot tub and I have found Shangri-La. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
sunshine 2 #37 April 14, 2004 QuoteNo I am not a victim, but I do feel a loss. Iam not hurt, but I do feel pain. I am not alone, and I am alone. I can see the future, even though the lights are out. --------------------------------------------------------------- Thanks, Kevin. Powerful words there, not only for those hurting because of love but also for those dealing with other life issues. I kinda like that quote too. That rainbo is a smart guy. I'm honored to have him as my friend. ___________________________________________ meow I get a Mike hug! I get a Mike hug! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Rainbo 0 #38 April 14, 2004 Rainbo TheSpeedTriple - Speed is everything "Blessed are those who can give without remembering, and take without forgetting." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dzdiva 7 #39 April 14, 2004 Not sure if this helps, but I found this a long time ago. I put it away, but have pulled it out from my dusty journals to once again remind myself. "To love, you must forgive yourself. If you're like me, you may forget your own telephone number, but you have an unfailing memory for your past mistakes. We compound this when we allow these memories to cloud the present. There are parents, for instance, who burden themselves with a lifetime of guilt for the mistakes they feel they made in bringing up their children. There are those who have made poor decisions in work, social, and personal situations and have pounded their chests raw with contrition. At one time or another, we all need forgiveness of others, but equally important is the forgiveness we owe ourselves. Love is not about keeping old wounds open, it is about healing them. It is about moving forward and getting on with life." -Leo Buscaglia Hugs and peace to all those who have found and lost love."It's not just a daydream if you choose to make it your life..." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ChasingBlueSky 0 #40 April 14, 2004 Rainbo, I've lost count of how many long conversations you and I have had since I first met you...somehow it always seems that a skydiving talk worked its way into a discussion about life. You have lived a very full life so far, more than most at twice you age - you have told me lots of good and bad that has happened to you, yet you are one of the most balanced people I know. You try to keep a positive mind (even when Henry and Roger passed away), and you always put being a Dad first and foremost (despite how hard some people make that on you). In those kids alone I think you know the true definition of love and sacrifice. Life, just like skydiving, is always at the learning stage...we are forever students. Take what you have learned so far with the pain you now have and find the lesson to be learned. Just from talking to you last weekend I know you are willing to take the time to be single and heal...and to get comfortable with being yourself again. It would be a massive mistake to rush into anything, going from relationship to relationship without hitting the reset button. If you didn't take this break, who you are would get lost along the way and any relationship you entered into would only fall apart without the full strength of your own personality. On top of that, you have your kids - be a good role model to them and show them the correct way to handle loss, and to show them its ok to be happy and single. They will take your lead later in life, and the better you handle this now, the easier it will be for them to find love later in life. They already know what it means to be loved from you - now show them how to give your love to someone else....so wait and find the right person.....or never find that person and still be happy. You have your kids, and you have your friends. In my book that makes you a very loved man. I'm glad to have you as a friend._________________________________________ you can burn the land and boil the sea, but you can't take the sky from me.... I WILL fly again..... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Gawain 0 #41 April 14, 2004 Quote ...figure it out. Not to pee in anyone's corn-flakes, but anyone that tells you they've figured it out has less of a clue than you do (IMO). I have no idea what it's about. Maybe I was close once...So I try and I scream and I beg and I sigh Just to prove I'm alive, and it's alright 'Cause tonight there's a way I'll make light of my treacherous life Make light! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Aviatrr 0 #42 April 14, 2004 Dude, true love is overrated.. I've experienced it twice in my life......and I think I've experienced it one more time than anybody is ever meant to...and both times it ended in disaster. Fuck it. If you're having fun, forget about "love"...if it's meant to happen, it will....otherwise enjoy lust and don't worry about anything else. Mike Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Luv2Fall 0 #43 April 16, 2004 When love beckons to you follow him, Though his ways are hard and steep. And when his wings enfold you yield to him, Though the sword hidden among his pinions May wound you. And when he speaks to you believe in him, Though his voice may shatter your dreams As the north wind lays waste the garden. For even as love crowns you so shall he crucify you. Even as he is for your growth So is he for your pruning. The Prophet by Gibran Khalil Gibran Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
WrongWay 0 #44 April 16, 2004 Quote The one thing I have figured out is that what can make some people feel that they are on top of the world can basically destroy another persons world. This can be true even if that was not the intent. You're exactly right. You can give someone all you have, be the one they've always waited for, be their everything. But some people can't handle a good relationship, whether it be caused by scarring from previous relationships, not being used be being "tied down" from being single for so long, hard relationships with friends or parents, it could be anything. Some people just refuse to recognize a good thing when they see it, and they run. I personally believe that it's a very sad thing, because these people generally end up alone, wishing they'd not left that single wonderful person, and they can have all they want from life but no one to share it with. I can see that you're not like that. You obviously believe in love and good relationships, but you seem frustrated that one or more have not worked out when you thought they would. This is normal, and will pass with time. Somewhere there is a person for you, someone who will appreciate all you have to offer and won't be frightened by it. Just take your time. Don't look for it, it will find you. Good luck bro. Wrong Way D #27371 Mal Manera Rodriguez Cajun Chicken Ø Hellfish #451 The wiser wolf prevails. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites