f1freak 0 #1 April 29, 2005 Just putting a list of assholes together (no particular order...) 1.The person who gave Kenny G. his sax lessons. I know you couldn’t have predicted the outcome, but the world will never forgive you. Is he the same guy who taught Michael Bolton to sing? Just wondering... 2.The person who wrote the manual that came with my TV. Under the heading “Troubleshooting: No picture can be seen," the advice given is “Are you facing the TV?” Oh, That’s the problem I was facing the microwave. 3.Telemarketers. Hey, I know these people have to make a living, but not at 7:30 am on a Saturday. Who the fuck buys anything at that hour on a Saturday anyway, except crack addicts, and they’ll find their crack on their own. 4.People who are 1000 years old and drive at least 15 mph under the speed limit. You don’t have much time so you might want to get there a little quicker. 5.Me. I admit it; I’m an asshole. I’m intolerant of stupid or rude people. I’m especially intolerant of assholes! If somebody is an asshole to me, then I feel the need to be an asshole back. I’ll even go out of my way to do it. I like to think that the other person is an asshole to me first, then I react as an asshole, but I’m sure all assholes think that.HAVE FUN... ...JUST DONT DIE Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
peacefuljeffrey 0 #2 April 29, 2005 Bug? -- Travis' ass. Travis' ass? -- Bug. Go on, don't be afraid. Crawl on up there...! Really, dude, what's gotten into you this mornin'?! LOL! -Jeffrey-Jeffrey "With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
f1freak 0 #3 April 29, 2005 another..... 6.Trekkies. Set your phaser on asshole with no life. Are you from the planet Dildohead? 7.That asshole of an old lady who spilled McDonalds coffee in her lap while she was driving. I can’t believe she had the balls to sue. You are an asshole and one of the major problems with our legal system. I don’t think the term “don’t drink and drive” was coined for you lady, but how about taking the bus next time.HAVE FUN... ...JUST DONT DIE Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
peacefuljeffrey 0 #4 April 29, 2005 Quote7.That asshole of an old lady who spilled McDonalds coffee in her lap while she was driving. I can’t believe she had the balls to sue. You are an asshole and one of the major problems with our legal system. I don’t think the term “don’t drink and drive” was coined for you lady, but how about taking the bus next time. There was another side to that story: the fact that McDonald's was serving its coffee well above the normal industry standard temperature. Numerous other burn injuries had been reported, according to what I heard, and yet they had made no adjustment, and that's why they were found to have had a kind of reckless disregard. That said, the temperature of the coffee should have made no fucking difference, because even if it were the regular "industry standard temperature," would you want THAT spilling all over your shriveled, dried-out cunt, you stupid old bag!?! I DIDN'T THINK SO. I mean, really. Who the fuck puts hot coffee between her legs in a moving car, figuring that oh, it won't be anything I'll be upset about if it spills on my twat -- OOOPS! HEY, WAIT, THIS COFFEE IS [I]MUCH HOTTER THAN I EXPECTED IT TO BE IF IT SPILLED ON MY LONG-DISUSED COOTER! Claiming that it was McDonald's at fault is like saying that she would have been just fine if REGULAR-HOT coffee had spilled on her damned minge. (Heh heh, yeah, I'm using the word from that animated netflick! "Oh, baby I'm thinkin' about your spaz-hole, thinkin' about your flange!") -Jeffrey-Jeffrey "With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
popsjumper 2 #5 April 29, 2005 wrto #7... I think the lawyers that took the case to court are the assholes and should have been bitch-slapped by the judge for doing so. Funny how "I screwed up" got replaced with the "It's YOUR fault" mentality.My reality and yours are quite different. I think we're all Bozos on this bus. Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
TheAnvil 0 #6 April 29, 2005 I am a JACKASS Vinny the Anvil Post Traumatic Didn't Make The Lakers Syndrome is REAL JACKASS POWER!!!!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
f1freak 0 #7 April 29, 2005 8. The Judge or Jury that awarded “The McDonalds’ Coffee Lady” a huge settlement. For that kind of money I would spill hot coffee on my head while dancing a polka and singing “You light up my life," but it doesn’t mean it was McDonalds’ fault.HAVE FUN... ...JUST DONT DIE Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bbarnhouse 0 #8 April 29, 2005 Wowza bad morning freak? I've coined a new phrase which seems to be applicable and you are most welcome to use it. Rather than our standard "a$$hole, a$$wipe or a$$hat" The new one is "sheepshit head" I guess that about covers it. If nothing else, the last laugh will be yours even if you are really ticked off! That is all, carry on. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AggieDave 6 #9 April 29, 2005 8. People who think it necissary to tailgate me when I'm riding my motorcycle. If I have to stop, they will kill me, no questions. 9. Me when riding my motorcycle. If you're tail gating me, I carry BB's in my pocket, I do toss them back onto windshields so you can learn a lesson. If I'm truely lucky one will bounce just right into your radiator and puncture.--"When I die, may I be surrounded by scattered chrome and burning gasoline." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SkydivingNurse 0 #10 April 29, 2005 #10 The management of the hospital I work at. I used to enjoy my job, now I spend more time doing paperwork and trying to keep from laughing in their smug faces when they tell me of the latest cutesy feel good do nothing project. I don't care when everyone's birthday is. Get me a damned pulse ox meter or BP cuff that works, or batteries in the IV pumps that aren't so freaking old they can no longer hold a charge. Fuck! Just let me be a fucking nurse for once, not some paper pushing drone. /yes, I hate my job now. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
f1freak 0 #11 April 29, 2005 Quote"sheepshit head" I LIKE THAT....HAVE FUN... ...JUST DONT DIE Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bbarnhouse 0 #12 April 29, 2005 QuoteI LIKE THAT LMAO! Well then its a damn good day I'd say!LOL sheepshit head....bwahhhhhh Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RfukfreeflyingW 0 #13 April 29, 2005 ooh ur right 11. My asshole school that scheduled me 2 exams back to back this FUKIN friday, in Law and society and Stats! Not to mention the stats exam is at 5:30 ---- -God, you are the perfect amount of dumb... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
f1freak 0 #14 April 29, 2005 12. The sheepshit head who is so stupid that they force companies to print directions on shampoo bottles. You mean you don’t drink the stuff? HAVE FUN... ...JUST DONT DIE Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bbarnhouse 0 #15 April 29, 2005 QuoteYou mean you don’t drink the stuff? No and I don't think its a good idea to use it as a lubricant either! (Sorry Chuck the door was open and I walked through). Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mnealtx 0 #16 April 29, 2005 QuoteQuoteYou mean you don’t drink the stuff? No and I don't think its a good idea to use it as a lubricant either! (Sorry Chuck the door was open and I walked through). But think of how spiffy-clean you'll be ...and no messy clean-up, afterwards!! Mike I love you, Shannon and Jim. POPS 9708 , SCR 14706 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
The111 1 #17 April 29, 2005 Quote9. Me when riding my motorcycle. If you're tail gating me, I carry BB's in my pocket, I do toss them back onto windshields so you can learn a lesson. If I'm truely lucky one will bounce just right into your radiator and puncture. Marbles work better. www.WingsuitPhotos.com Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
GTAVercetti 0 #18 April 29, 2005 I'm a dick. but not an asshole. Why yes, my license number is a palindrome. Thank you for noticing. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dan_iv 0 #19 April 29, 2005 13. The Asshole who invented cubicles 14. Senior Management that can't manage there way out of a wet paper bag! 15. The idiot that invented the speedo and thought it might be a good idea to market them to men. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mnealtx 0 #20 April 29, 2005 QuoteQuote9. Me when riding my motorcycle. If you're tail gating me, I carry BB's in my pocket, I do toss them back onto windshields so you can learn a lesson. If I'm truely lucky one will bounce just right into your radiator and puncture. Marbles work better. I was thinking ball bearings, myself.... Mike I love you, Shannon and Jim. POPS 9708 , SCR 14706 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jdhill 0 #21 April 29, 2005 QuoteI was thinking ball bearings, myself.... QuoteI carry BB's in my pocket Ummm... what do you think a BB is? JAll that is necessary for the triumph of evil is that good men do nothing. - Edmund Burke Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mnealtx 0 #22 April 29, 2005 QuoteQuoteI was thinking ball bearings, myself.... QuoteI carry BB's in my pocket Ummm... what do you think a BB is? J Like a ball bearing, but lighter metal and a lot smaller... I'm thinking 1/4" steel ball bearings... but then again, I'm Mike I love you, Shannon and Jim. POPS 9708 , SCR 14706 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
highfly 0 #23 April 29, 2005 These guys http://www.thecarolinachannel.com/irresistible/4430029/detail.html www.myspace.com/durtymac Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
f1freak 0 #24 April 29, 2005 The guy that wrote the book about the bell curve. Man, too bad he was born. Maybe I kould hav gon 2 Harvard. HAVE FUN... ...JUST DONT DIE Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bbarnhouse 0 #25 April 29, 2005 QuoteMaybe I kould hav gon 2 Harvard Bwahhhhhh you aren't saying it right! Its: "Haaahvaahd." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
