iluvtofly 0 #1 February 14, 2008 So it's been a while for me. And I've found some unfortunate substitutions for not getting any sex. The most popular one seems to be food. Unfortunately I'm too poor for a gym membership and my asthma doesn't really like me to go outside in this bitter cold unless absolutely necessary. What do those of you out there in my same sad position do for a substitution? And for all those "I don't need to worry about finding a substitution." Well...I won't say what I'm thinking for fear of getting banned. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CSpenceFLY 1 #2 February 14, 2008 The logical answer here is masturbation. That will be $45 please. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JustChuteMeNow 0 #3 February 14, 2008 I thought a lot of women had BOB come over. Think of how stupid the average person is and realize that statistically half of them are stupider than that. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lindercles 0 #4 February 14, 2008 Yesterday I walked outside just in time to hear my neighbor say to his friend "you just can't substitute for fuckin'!" He's a very, very large man, but he's right. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
iluvtofly 0 #5 February 14, 2008 He sounds like he knows what he's talking about. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lawrocket 3 #6 February 14, 2008 Go to Speaker's Corner. It's awesome! Okay, not a substitute. Not even close. There IS no substitute. As a female poster here once told me, anyone who thinks even skydiving is better than sex isn't doing it right. My wife is hotter than your wife. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
iluvtofly 0 #7 February 14, 2008 Quote Go to Speaker's Corner. It's awesome! I've been there. It scares me. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Broke 0 #8 February 14, 2008 Hump your co workers legsDivot your source for all things Hillbilly. Anvil Brother 84 SCR 14192 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
iluvtofly 0 #9 February 14, 2008 Quote Hump your co workers legs Somehow I don't think that would go over well. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LeatherNeck5931 0 #10 February 14, 2008 Alcohol seems to work pretty well....It might not be that great of a substitute but it sure as hell takes your mind off of what you're missing! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LeatherNeck5931 0 #11 February 14, 2008 Come to think of it...i need another beer Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
iluvtofly 0 #12 February 14, 2008 Quote Alcohol seems to work pretty well....It might not be that great of a substitute but it sure as hell takes your mind off of what you're missing! I do use that on occasion. But with working in EMS I can't do it too often cause then I can't get called in in the case of an emergency. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skydemon2 0 #13 February 14, 2008 You should work with me....... Sorry if masturbation doesnt do it for you i dont know what could help.... knitting maybe? I need a new hat! Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly goes clean to the bone! I like to start my day off with a little Ray of Soulshine™!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kschilk 0 #14 February 14, 2008 Quote Quote Alcohol seems to work pretty well....It might not be that great of a substitute but it sure as hell takes your mind off of what you're missing! I do use that on occasion. But with working in EMS I can't do it too often cause then I can't get called in in the case of an emergency. Ya' need to go to work for the Coroner....lotsa' stiffies there! "T'was ever thus." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Broke 0 #15 February 14, 2008 Web cam,make some money and play at the same timeDivot your source for all things Hillbilly. Anvil Brother 84 SCR 14192 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SarahC07 0 #16 February 14, 2008 Quote Alcohol seems to work pretty well....It might not be that great of a substitute but it sure as hell takes your mind off of what you're missing! Okay, please tell me that I'm not the only one who craves sex MORE when under the influence of alcohol... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DJL 232 #17 February 14, 2008 QuoteSo it's been a while for me. And I've found some unfortunate substitutions for not getting any sex. The most popular one seems to be food. Remind me never to accept a cucumber salad from you."I encourage all awesome dangerous behavior." - Jeffro Fincher Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Unstable 8 #18 February 14, 2008 I thought it was just guys that felt like this?!?!? =========Shaun ========== Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
grannyinthesky 0 #19 February 14, 2008 QuoteI thought it was just guys that felt like this?!?!? Nope.....not just guys........and the young don't have a monoply on those feelings either.........."safety first... and What the hell..... safety second, Too!!! " ~~jmy POPS #10490 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jcd11235 0 #20 February 14, 2008 Coffee. Okay, it's not an adequate substitute, but it's similar in a lot of ways.Math tutoring available. Only $6! per hour! First lesson: Factorials! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
popsjumper 2 #21 February 14, 2008 OMG, the irony of this topic being posted by a woman.My reality and yours are quite different. I think we're all Bozos on this bus. Falcon5232, SCS8170, SCSA353, POPS9398, DS239 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
virgin-burner 1 #22 February 14, 2008 come over, i'll shag your brains out! but, could you do a little begging for it before the act? that would be quite some turn-on.. “Some may never live, but the crazy never die.” -Hunter S. Thompson "No. Try not. Do... or do not. There is no try." -Yoda Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mamajumps 0 #23 February 14, 2008 Yes, as Spence said...masterbation... go buy yourself a toy and if you get a good one, you will wonder will you ever needed a man to begin with! Toys have so many perks: 1) They only want it when you do 2) they dont want to cuddle afterwards 3) They don't bitch if its been a few weeks and there are many more...just cant think of them right now Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ZeG 0 #24 February 14, 2008 I´m willing to sacrifice myself for any female in need in the Miami areaAge doesn´t matter Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ladyskydiver 0 #25 February 14, 2008 Thanks for reminding me that I'm not getting any and that BOB is broken and needs to be replaced . Quote Quote Alcohol seems to work pretty well....It might not be that great of a substitute but it sure as hell takes your mind off of what you're missing! Okay, please tell me that I'm not the only one who craves sex MORE when under the influence of alcohol... Nope...you're not the only one. I've got a high enough sex drive without it...add alcohol and the man had better be able to go for hours....again...and again...and.... Life is short! Break the rules! Forgive quickly! Kiss slowly! Love truly, Laugh uncontrollably. And never regret anything that made you smile. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
