0
Nataly

What's it like to be a foreigner?

Recommended Posts

This question is for everyone who has ever lived for an extended period of time as a foreigner. What was the hardest thing to adapt to in your new country? For me, it was:

Sweden: the language barrier and how "at ease" they seemed about sexuality

UK: the way they use and manipulate the English language... For example, I often found it surprising how much what *isn't* said can matter.

France: the admin... Dear GOD, the admin!!

Morocco (although I didn't technically "live" there): the different gender "roles" and higher focus on family/community as opposed to self.

Hardest of all everywhere is that you always have to consider that criticism of your new country can really cause offense, no matter how much everyone agrees with you... It's kind of like telling a fat person they are fat... They know they are fat, they can say "I'm fat" but if you say "you're fat" it hurts the person's feelings. It's just the way it is.
"There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse."
- Chris Hadfield
« Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. »
- my boss

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
I spent six months on Okinawa, back around 1980. The hardest thing then was for someone like me, who was brought up to be respectful of others, to put up with the "big city kids" who weren't respectful of ANYTHING on the island -- not the people, the customs, the language, nothing. Of course, their actions reflected on all of us, and today, some 30+ years later, the Japanese government is trying to get all the US military to move to Guam.

I spent a year in Korea around 1989, and that culture was really different. I guess the hardest thing for me to get used to was that they were so -- I guess animalistic might work. They don't close the door to the restroom, they "do their business" on a street corner if necessary, etc. They were pretty good at talking in Korean, then looking at an American and laughing, leading one to think he was the butt of some joke. It didn't make for very good relations.

Oh, and the black market was stronger than anywhere else I've been.

After a year, I was ready to come back to the "real" world.
I'm a jumper. Even though I don't always have money for jumps, and may not ever own a rig again, I'll always be a jumper.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

I'm going to cheat a little because I've never lived abroad, but I have spent periods staying with a French family and I think there are similarities - it's certainly very different from experiencing another country in normal tourist mode, where you're more likely to have compatriot company and the locals tend to make allowances for your foreignness.

For me in those circumstances it was definitely the language - my schoolboy French was OK for basic communication, but it was exhausting trying to follow and take part in conversations between native speakers.

I also found that taking away my mother tongue seemed to remove a huge chunk of my personality. Maybe it is a British thing, but for me language is a very subtle tool - especially when it comes to humour. The loss of all those little expressions and inflections made me feel socially inept, and after a few days I longed for a bit of banter with a fellow Brit. :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
I'm in Belgium. The European way of paying bills online is a bit annoying. I kind of like the whole 'green' thing. Roads suck here. Drivers are worse than the roads.

The hardest thing to get used to is that nothing ever seems to be open.
I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet..

But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Quote

I also found that taking away my mother tongue seemed to remove a huge chunk of my personality. Maybe it is a British thing, but for me language is a very subtle tool - especially when it comes to humour. The loss of all those little expressions and inflections made me feel socially inept, and after a few days I longed for a bit of banter with a fellow Brit. :)



I was surprised how inept I felt just going to the UK, where they theoretically speak a language that is *almost* my native tongue... I am also feeling the same thing in France, where my French is remarkably different to theirs... People take for granted just how trying (and tiring) it is to constantly have to think about what you're saying - I felt this most when I was learning Swedish...
"There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse."
- Chris Hadfield
« Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. »
- my boss

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Quote

I also found that taking away my mother tongue seemed to remove a huge chunk of my personality. Maybe it is a British thing, but for me language is a very subtle tool - especially when it comes to humour. The loss of all those little expressions and inflections made me feel socially inept, and after a few days I longed for a bit of banter with a fellow Brit. :)



I was surprised how inept I felt just going to the UK, where they theoretically speak a language that is *almost* my native tongue... I am also feeling the same thing in France, where my French is remarkably different to theirs... People take for granted just how trying (and tiring) it is to constantly have to think about what you're saying - I felt this most when I was learning Swedish...
"There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse."
- Chris Hadfield
« Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. »
- my boss

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Quote

I'm in Belgium. The European way of paying bills online is a bit annoying.



How is it different from the American way of paying bills online?
"There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Quote

I'm in Belgium. The European way of paying bills online is a bit annoying.



How is it different from the American way of paying bills online?
"There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Quote


Hmm. must change my glasses I keep seeing double.



Stupid servers; I kept waiting...and waiting...w/o getting a response on submission, so I finally gave up, checked and saw that my post was not made. It surprised me to see that they apparently did it sometime later.
"There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Coming to the USA from Britain: adjectives used as adverbs, split infinitives, and other linguistic mangling. And then there are the people who drive slowly in the left lane.
...

The only sure way to survive a canopy collision is not to have one.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Quote

This question is for everyone who has ever lived for an extended period of time as a foreigner. What was the hardest thing to adapt to in your new country? For me, it was:

Sweden: the language barrier and how "at ease" they seemed about sexuality

UK: the way they use and manipulate the English language... For example, I often found it surprising how much what *isn't* said can matter.

France: the admin... Dear GOD, the admin!!

Morocco (although I didn't technically "live" there): the different gender "roles" and higher focus on family/community as opposed to self.

Hardest of all everywhere is that you always have to consider that criticism of your new country can really cause offense, no matter how much everyone agrees with you... It's kind of like telling a fat person they are fat... They know they are fat, they can say "I'm fat" but if you say "you're fat" it hurts the person's feelings. It's just the way it is.

Ten yrs. in So. Cal. now. I don't let the locals know I speak Spanish. Can be fun at times. Especially when ya bust em talking about you? Damn Gringo.
I hold it true, whate'er befall;
I feel it, when I sorrow most;
'Tis better to have loved and lost
Than never to have loved at all.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Quote

Quote

This question is for everyone who has ever lived for an extended period of time as a foreigner. What was the hardest thing to adapt to in your new country? For me, it was:

Sweden: the language barrier and how "at ease" they seemed about sexuality

UK: the way they use and manipulate the English language... For example, I often found it surprising how much what *isn't* said can matter.

France: the admin... Dear GOD, the admin!!

Morocco (although I didn't technically "live" there): the different gender "roles" and higher focus on family/community as opposed to self.

Hardest of all everywhere is that you always have to consider that criticism of your new country can really cause offense, no matter how much everyone agrees with you... It's kind of like telling a fat person they are fat... They know they are fat, they can say "I'm fat" but if you say "you're fat" it hurts the person's feelings. It's just the way it is.

Ten yrs. in So. Cal. now. I don't let the locals know I speak Spanish. Can be fun at times. Especially when ya bust em talking about you? Damn Gringo.


been on an extended weekend to the netherlands last year; mind you, i dont speak dutch, but it's similar enough to german and english to "understand" what they're saying - my host talked to his friends about me - we're not friends anymore. :|
“Some may never live, but the crazy never die.”
-Hunter S. Thompson
"No. Try not. Do... or do not. There is no try."
-Yoda

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Quote

Quote

I also found that taking away my mother tongue seemed to remove a huge chunk of my personality. Maybe it is a British thing, but for me language is a very subtle tool - especially when it comes to humour. The loss of all those little expressions and inflections made me feel socially inept, and after a few days I longed for a bit of banter with a fellow Brit. :)



I was surprised how inept I felt just going to the UK, where they theoretically speak a language that is *almost* my native tongue... I am also feeling the same thing in France, where my French is remarkably different to theirs... People take for granted just how trying (and tiring) it is to constantly have to think about what you're saying - I felt this most when I was learning Swedish...


Isn't the French in Canuda pretty much what was spoken 300 years ago... kinda like the English found in isolated places in Appalachia???

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Quote

This question is for everyone who has ever lived for an extended period of time as a foreigner. What was the hardest thing to adapt to in your new country? For me, it was:

Sweden: the language barrier and how "at ease" they seemed about sexuality

UK: the way they use and manipulate the English language... For example, I often found it surprising how much what *isn't* said can matter.

France: the admin... Dear GOD, the admin!!

Morocco (although I didn't technically "live" there): the different gender "roles" and higher focus on family/community as opposed to self.

Hardest of all everywhere is that you always have to consider that criticism of your new country can really cause offense, no matter how much everyone agrees with you... It's kind of like telling a fat person they are fat... They know they are fat, they can say "I'm fat" but if you say "you're fat" it hurts the person's feelings. It's just the way it is.



Loved the UK. The pommies can be quite xenophobic though. I was brought up in an english family, so the cultural stuff was pretty natural.

Australia is like being home in Africa again, except that I've got to learn how normal Ozzies think. Squeak is my role model, so I'm pretty screwed:ph34r:
Experienced jumper - someone who has made mistakes more often than I have and lived.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Quote


Loved the UK. The pommies can be quite xenophobic though. I was brought up in an english family, so the cultural stuff was pretty natural.

Australia is like being home in Africa again, except that I've got to learn how normal Ozzies think. Squeak is my role model, so I'm pretty screwed:ph34r:





That you would even consider using me as a role model, speaks volumes about your intellect.:)
DUMBARSE:D:D:D:D
You are not now, nor will you ever be, good enough to not die in this sport (Sparky)
My Life ROCKS!
How's yours doing?

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Quote

Quote

I'm in Belgium. The European way of paying bills online is a bit annoying.



How is it different from the American way of paying bills online?



For my American bills, I go to my bank online, put how much to send in the little block by each bill and tell it to pay them. Of course, I have to log in and have it set up, but it takes about five minutes. If I don't have the bill handy, I overpay. The payee's computer figures it out and adjusts the bill next time.

For European bills...you must have the bill with you. It has a special code at the bottom. Don't know what it is for. You must input information for each bill and pay them one at a time. To log into the site, you have to have a device called a digipass. You enter your PIN in it and it gives you an eight digit code that is your password right now. For each individual bill you want to pay, you have to go through the procedure with the digipass twice. You must pay exactly what the bill says or you will get a delinquency notice or they will send you a check for the overage. Then, I get to worry about depositing the check.

I'm not entirely sure it is more convenient that writing checks and mailing them.
I know it just wouldnt be right to kill all the stupid people that we meet..

But do you think it would be appropriate to just remove all of the warning labels and let nature take its course.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
As a Brit living in Russia for 4 years now the hardest things for me include:

- the language
- the corruption
- the standard of driving - terrifyingly bad
- the banking systems (eg when they make a mistake, they hold your money for 30 days before refunding)
- the indifference in terms of customer service (the customer is always wrong / an annoyance to staff / the frustration from waiting for 20 minutes to speak to someone on the phone at the bank, only to have them hang up as soon as they hear you are foreign)

But the skydiving here is pretty good!

***********************************************
I'm NOT totally useless... I can be used as a bad example

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
The hardest thing was that I never fitted in a true sense, but I suppose that is more a culture thing, and your culture does not leave you that easy.
The easiest thing, probably woman. That foreign guy, you know.
You have the right to your opinion, and I have the right to tell you how Fu***** stupid it is.
Davelepka - "This isn't an x-box, or a Chevy truck forum"
Whatever you do, don't listen to ChrisD.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Quote

Quote

Isn't the French in Canuda pretty much what was spoken 300 years ago... kinda like the English found in isolated places in Appalachia???



Buddy of mine from Quebec calls it "redneck French..."


I am NOT from Quebec. >:(
"There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse."
- Chris Hadfield
« Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. »
- my boss

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Quote

Quote

Quote

Isn't the French in Canuda pretty much what was spoken 300 years ago... kinda like the English found in isolated places in Appalachia???



Buddy of mine from Quebec calls it "redneck French..."


I am NOT from Quebec. >:(


What???:o
We Merkuns were told the Canadians rounded up all the French speakers and isolated them in Quebec. That isn't true?:|
"There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones.

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites
Quote

As a Brit living in Russia for 4 years now the hardest things for me include:

- the language
- the corruption
- the standard of driving - terrifyingly bad
- the banking systems (eg when they make a mistake, they hold your money for 30 days before refunding)
- the indifference in terms of customer service (the customer is always wrong / an annoyance to staff / the frustration from waiting for 20 minutes to speak to someone on the phone at the bank, only to have them hang up as soon as they hear you are foreign)

But the skydiving here is pretty good!



hmm
your description misses vodka in the samovar and bears walking on the streets while balalaikas playing on a radio.

you make Russia looks like France!
language, bad driving, awkward customer service :)


just kidding :)

Share this post


Link to post
Share on other sites

Join the conversation

You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account.
Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible.

Guest
Reply to this topic...

×   Pasted as rich text.   Paste as plain text instead

  Only 75 emoji are allowed.

×   Your link has been automatically embedded.   Display as a link instead

×   Your previous content has been restored.   Clear editor

×   You cannot paste images directly. Upload or insert images from URL.

0