skymama 35 #1 November 18, 2013 I've gone and pissed off a sister-in-law and now she and her family aren't coming to Christmas at mom's house. Mom is going to kick my ass. When am I going to learn to keep my mouth shut? She is Da Man, and you better not mess with Da Man, because she will lay some keepdown on you faster than, well, really fast. ~Billvon Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BIGUN 1,090 #2 November 18, 2013 Is Mom the silent treatment type? Cause that could be a good thing thru the holidays. Nobody has time to listen; because they're desperately chasing the need of being heard. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
theonlyski 3 #3 November 18, 2013 skymama I've gone and pissed off a sister-in-law and now she and her family aren't coming to Christmas at mom's house. Mom is going to kick my ass. When am I going to learn to keep my mouth shut? More food and elbow room at the table for you. "I may be a dirty pirate hooker...but I'm not about to go stand on the corner." iluvtofly DPH -7, TDS 578, Muff 5153, SCR 14890 I'm an asshole, and I approve this message Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LuckyMcSwervy 0 #4 November 18, 2013 Awwww.... I hate to hear about family strife. Is it repairable by Christmas? Do you want to repair it by then? I hope everything calms down and everyone gets together for Christmas and celebrates the reason for the season and togetherness. OMG I'm such a sap... Always be kinder than you feel. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
normiss 635 #5 November 18, 2013 That god damn 3 hour plus break for a certain someone to go to church is ridiculous and it impacts an very large family get together. I have found it selfish. It has made me want to leave the event every year. You did the right thing baby, SHE is the only one she considers when it comes to this event. Think of the entire family, work as a family, together. Go to the god damn midnight mass for christ's sake. How's that??? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CSpenceFLY 1 #6 November 18, 2013 I've always had a hard time with the militant religious that can't miss one trip to church, but not enough to loose any sleep over it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jimmytavino 16 #7 November 18, 2013 .... Sometimes we go ... different directions.. doesn't mean it has to be forever.. a change-up every now and then is good... i dunno Families.. " damned if you do?? damned if you don'T ": ... and Please.... don't even get me started on when you ADD.. " that whole OTHER side of the Family " family...Not sure about the Mass schedule but it's likely there are 2 or 3 different options... anyway... good luck stay cool. try to work it out ( edited to eliminate an assumption, on my part. ) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JohnMitchell 14 #8 November 18, 2013 CSpenceFLY I've always had a hard time with the militant religious that can't miss one trip to church, but not enough to loose any sleep over it. My in laws are very devout, but they certainly will skip Sunday meetings, etc. for family events. They practice it, not flaunt it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LuckyMcSwervy 0 #9 November 18, 2013 Quote Go to the god damn midnight mass for christ's sake. How's that??? I think Midnight Mass is the most beautiful Christmas Mass anyway. JMHO. Always be kinder than you feel. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skymama 35 #10 November 18, 2013 My family is not religious. Our tradition was always to have a big family gathering on Christmas Eve that included games, frivolity, and everyone all dressed up for the big meal and present opening. This sister-in-law joined the family and decided her group is going to church right after dinner every year. So, just as everyone is all excited from hours of build-up to open presents, eleven people end up sitting around for 2-3 hours waiting for 4 people to come back. This year, I finally asked if they could just go to a service on Christmas Eve or Day that wasn't right in the middle of our family celebration. I wasn't asking her not to go to church, I respect her views. I was just asking for a compromise. Now, they're just not coming. Mom is ok with it actually but Dad isn't happy now that I've "started" something. She is Da Man, and you better not mess with Da Man, because she will lay some keepdown on you faster than, well, really fast. ~Billvon Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JohnMitchell 14 #11 November 18, 2013 I think you just drug the wet blanket off the party. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wmw999 2,163 #12 November 18, 2013 Quote This year, I finally asked if they could just go to a service on Christmas Eve or Day that wasn't right in the middle of our family celebration. I wasn't asking her not to go to church, I respect her views. I was just asking for a compromise. Now, they're just not coming. OK, I'm the biggest make-nice peacemaker in the world. You're right. But since obviously the specific church service is important to her, so is she. To your brother's (I assume) detriment. Wendy P.There is nothing more dangerous than breaking a basic safety rule and getting away with it. It removes fear of the consequences and builds false confidence. (tbrown) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skymama 35 #13 November 18, 2013 My mom asked for a compromise, like every other year they change times of their service. Sis-in-law's reply was, "Christmas is Christmas, not about give and take...relationships are about give and take..". This is the attitude we're working with. She is Da Man, and you better not mess with Da Man, because she will lay some keepdown on you faster than, well, really fast. ~Billvon Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LuckyMcSwervy 0 #14 November 18, 2013 skymama My family is not religious. Our tradition was always to have a big family gathering on Christmas Eve that included games, frivolity, and everyone all dressed up for the big meal and present opening. This sister-in-law joined the family and decided her group is going to church right after dinner every year. So, just as everyone is all excited from hours of build-up to open presents, eleven people end up sitting around for 2-3 hours waiting for 4 people to come back. This year, I finally asked if they could just go to a service on Christmas Eve or Day that wasn't right in the middle of our family celebration. I wasn't asking her not to go to church, I respect her views. I was just asking for a compromise. Now, they're just not coming. Mom is ok with it actually but Dad isn't happy now that I've "started" something. As someone who likes going to Mass at Christmas, I think you put it in a way that was nice and respectful. How could she NOT go along with that? When I got married, my husband's family is Lutheran. If we were in Ebensburg for Christmas I went to their church for Mass. I really wanted to be at my own parish at home in NJ, but becoming part of another family requires a lot of compromise. I had a hard time in the beginning but you learn to pick the battles and want your spouse to be happy too. Always be kinder than you feel. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jimmytavino 16 #15 November 18, 2013 Let her KNOW that you'd all be happy to TAKE if she'd be willing to Give... ( are ALL 4 of her family members in full agreement with her ) ( i bet she'd be afraid to take a vote ) As for " Christmas " ! too far in the future . i'm still working on the halloween candy i bought a week after,, when it was 75 % Off!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
CSpenceFLY 1 #16 November 18, 2013 Sounds like she is an unreasonable bitch. You want me to talk to her? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
promise5 17 #17 November 18, 2013 My suggestions: Blame it on your twin. Suggest she converts to being a Baptist, we don't have church Christmas Day. Depending on her size and your ability just take her out. If need be you might want to recruit a tag team partner. The problem with that is you just want to hurt her enough to keep her home but not send her to the hospital. Crud, I need coffee! No matter how slowly you say oranges it never sounds like gullible. Believe me I tried. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skymama 35 #18 November 18, 2013 I just checked the website for her church. There IS an 11:00 pm service she could go to. It would actually be perfect for her because she's usually up until 2 am anyway. (We know this because that's when she sends e-mails). It really comes down to it being her way or no way. This is not the only problem we've had with her. I just finally took a stand. My kids, Mark and other brother were so happy with me!She is Da Man, and you better not mess with Da Man, because she will lay some keepdown on you faster than, well, really fast. ~Billvon Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LuckyMcSwervy 0 #19 November 18, 2013 skymama I just checked the website for her church. There IS an 11:00 pm service she could go to. It would actually be perfect for her because she's usually up until 2 am anyway. (We know this because that's when she sends e-mails). It really comes down to it being her way or no way. This is not the only problem we've had with her. I just finally took a stand. My kids, Mark and other brother were so happy with me! LOL... that was smart. I'd email her at 2am with the Mass schedule and copy everyone in the family. Maybe out it in a DZ.com style poll, minus the boobies option since we're talking about church. Always be kinder than you feel. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Remster 24 #20 November 18, 2013 skymama I just checked the website for her church. There IS an 11:00 pm service she could go to. It would actually be perfect for her because she's usually up until 2 am anyway. (We know this because that's when she sends e-mails). It really comes down to it being her way or no way. This is not the only problem we've had with her. I just finally took a stand. My kids, Mark and other brother were so happy with me! You killed xmas. (Good on ya!)Remster Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JohnMitchell 14 #21 November 18, 2013 LuckyMcSwervy I'd email her at 2am with the Mass schedule a Emails are so impersonal. I think a 2am drunk dial would be much better. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LuckyMcSwervy 0 #22 November 18, 2013 JohnMitchell *** I'd email her at 2am with the Mass schedule a Emails are so impersonal. I think a 2am drunk dial would be much better. OMG... I think Andrea's too classy for that one.Always be kinder than you feel. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
normiss 635 #23 November 18, 2013 I dunno - it does appear the emails are 2 am drunken emails. As I told Andrea, blame it ALL on me. I can handle it. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
JohnMitchell 14 #24 November 18, 2013 LuckyMcSwervy I think Andrea's too classy for that one. Yeah, you're right. We'll have Normiss call her. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jumpwally 0 #25 November 18, 2013 ehh,,your Dad will enjoy it once the fun starts...... smile, be nice, enjoy life FB # - 1083 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites