2fat2fly 0 #1 May 18, 2003 Feel free to add to the list. Excellent post whoring opportunity Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, "I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here, and drink whatever comes out?" Who was the first person to say "See that chicken there....I'm gonna eat the next thing that comes outta it's butt." Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp, which no decent human being would eat? Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer? If Jimmy cracks corn and no one cares, why is there a song about him? Can a hearse carrying a corpse drive in the carpool lane? If the professor on Gilligan's Island can make a radio out of a coconut, why can't he fix a hole in a boat? Why do people point to their wrist when asking for the time, but don't point to their crotch when they ask where the bathroom is? Why does your OB-GYN leave the room when you get undressed if they are going to look up there anyway? Why does Goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs! What do you call male ballerinas? If Wile E. Coyote had enough money to buy all that Acme crap, why didn't he just buy dinner? If quizzes are quizzical, what are tests? If corn oil is made from corn, and vegetable oil is made from vegetables, then what is baby oil made from? If electricity comes from electrons, does morality come from morons? Is Disney World the only people trap operated by a mouse? Why do the Alphabet song and Twinkle, Twinkle Little Star have the same tune? Do illiterate people get the full effect of Alphabet Soup? Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your ass? Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you, but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window? Does pushing the elevator button more than once make it arrive faster?I am not the man. But the man knows my name...and he's worried Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
andy2 0 #2 May 18, 2003 [QUOTE]Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?[/QUOTE] The cold would damage the lightbulb rending it ineffective. --------------------------------------------- let my inspiration flow, in token rhyme suggesting rhythm... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Casch 0 #3 May 18, 2003 um...hate to tell you but there's a light in my freezer and I've never had a problem with it Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
andy2 0 #4 May 18, 2003 you better get a rigger to check it for signs of wear, imo. --------------------------------------------- let my inspiration flow, in token rhyme suggesting rhythm... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bunge 0 #5 May 18, 2003 why are there interstate highways in Hawaii? BUNGE I don't hate them, I just like us better. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cindee 0 #6 May 18, 2003 I think there should be lights in mailbox's also. I'm always a little hesitant sticking my hand in there at night...__________________________________________________ "If happy little bluebirds fly above the rainbow, why oh why can't I?" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
oldnewbie 0 #7 May 18, 2003 My freezer has a light bulb, and yes, i did crawl into it and it goes out when the door is shut!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Casch 0 #8 May 18, 2003 LOL! You know you could always test it by pushing that nifty little lever that the door presses when you shut it. Although, when you want first hand info, you gotta do what you gotta do Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflir29 0 #9 May 18, 2003 Quote You know you could always test it by pushing that nifty little lever that the door presses when you shut it. The engineers put that there as a ruse for suckers!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Michele 1 #10 May 18, 2003 Who discovered that the artichoke was actually edible? Ciels- Michele ~Do Angels keep the dreams we seek While our hearts lie bleeding?~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hooked 0 #11 May 18, 2003 QuoteWho discovered that the artichoke was actually edible? And we should thank them, who ever it was, for discovering this little fact! J -------------------------------------- Sometimes we're just being Humans.....But we're always Human Beings. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Iflyme 0 #12 May 18, 2003 Quotethe professor on Gilligan's Island My kids take piano lessons ... the other day, I was listening to a new song being explored for the first time by my 8 year old ... after a few notes, I realized she was playing the theme to Gilligans Island! (I always liked Maryanne better than Ginger!) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
oldnewbie 0 #13 May 18, 2003 Well, when you were only about 8 years old, climbing inside seemed like a lot more fun!!! I don't know if you remember the old fridges that had the handles on it that locked, and you had to pull the handle to open it again!!! Well i found out why they are against the law now. I'm glad my mom heard me pounding on the fridge door, from the inside!!! It was VERY dark in there!! I wasn't always the sharpest rock in the river!!! And now i jump out of airplanes!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
aero04 0 #14 May 18, 2003 And the one everyone has heard: Why do we drive on a parkway and park on a driveway? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AggieDave 6 #15 May 18, 2003 Why do drive up ATMs have brail buttons?--"When I die, may I be surrounded by scattered chrome and burning gasoline." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Unstable 8 #16 May 18, 2003 Who ever thought up of the idea to Fry IceCream? Wow, we have IceCream here, as if it's not bad enough for you, what can we do to make it more fattening? Oh yes, lets find and ingeneous way to fry it!! i want some now. dammit sds=========Shaun ========== Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Casch 0 #17 May 18, 2003 WHAT THE HELL IS FRIED ICECREAM! Seriously, you can fry that stuff, that's insane. I wana try Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
suz 0 #18 May 18, 2003 Quote I don't know if you remember the old fridges that had the handles on it that locked BWHAHAHAHAHAHA!!! That I still have one! it has the old school freezer that you have to defrost yourself! I once dared a mate of mine to stick his tounge on a built up chunk of ice in the freezer. let me say that his tounge took a while to heal! Two years prior to that incident I broke his arm by accidently smashing a frozen coke bottle ( the old school glass bottles) on his arm I was attempting to break up the ice in the bottle. Mind you...we were only six years old! Don't bother me, I'm living happily ever after Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
akaGQ 0 #19 May 18, 2003 Like I said before you Aussies are crrrazy. And even more so seems the chicks are tougher and more ballsier than the guys. IMO - GQ ... it was the love of the air and sky and flying, the lure of adventure, the appreciation of beauty ... -Charles Lindberg Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
suz 0 #20 May 18, 2003 Yeah! You should see me wrestle a crocodile! Don't bother me, I'm living happily ever after Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Faber 0 #21 May 18, 2003 Quote You should see me wrestle a crocodile We all wantofcours naked Stay safe Stefan Faber Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Unstable 8 #22 May 19, 2003 QuoteWHAT THE HELL IS FRIED ICECREAM! Seriously, you can fry that stuff, that's insane. I wana try It's good stuff, you can buy it at most Mexican Resturants around here. They a scoop of ice cream, cover it in corn flakes and put it in a freezer at like -30F. Needs to be rock hard. Fry it REALLLY hot for 30 seconds or so, cover it in honey and whipped cream mmmmmmmmmmm, sds=========Shaun ========== Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nacmacfeegle 0 #23 May 19, 2003 How does the guy that drives the snowplough get to work? -------------------- He who receives an idea from me, receives instruction himself without lessening mine; as he who lights his taper at mine, receives light without darkening me. Thomas Jefferson Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
