Am I overreacting? :(

[batbex 0]

I agree with everyone else - you are definitely not overreacting!

That girl sounds like a cross between a 'pyschotic nasty horrible bitch from hell' and a 'vain insecure jealous and intimidated pathetic excuse for a female', add alcohol and a pretty, geniunely nice girl who's unwittingly and unintentionally just taken any hope of male attention away from said girl for the duration of the night and maybe indefinitely, on her own dz[which she probably percieves as her territory] and it would seem you get a nasty horrible situation in a bathroom

I hope you're ok, and I hope she's woken up realising what an idiot she was and how horrible she was and regretting it lots

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[EricaH 0]

Rosa, I can only imaginethat this is a coward. Waiting until you had "just begun to use the toilet" to scream at you - is an incredulously ridiculous thing. If I were you though, I woulda swung the door open to see her face. She's basically attacking you - she deserves anything back.

I can def see how this would bring back fresh horrors from Orlando & it's horrid for a tripe of a person to cause fear of any harm to you.

I've heard of jealousy - but this is absolutely unacceptable!!

Jeesh... I'm appalledthat this could happen to someone as kind as yourself.

But, you're apparently so damn hot that you really pissed some chick off even while wearing a turtleneck - WOW!! That's an offsided compliment if there ever was one.

There is no can't. Only lack of knowledge or fear. Only you can fix your fear.

PMS #227 (just like the TV show)

[VanillaSkyGirl 6]

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Surely someone at the dz saw her go into the toilets, she must've walked in in a hurry too from what you said about her behaviour.

Of course, that night I already tried to find out if anyone had seen who had walked in after me or walked out of the bathroom right before me. I had a small group of friends who were the only ones who were in the area and could have seen who it was. Sadly, none of them had noticed who had walked in or out...they had been talking and watching people dance in the other direction.

I also tried to find her based on her footwear, but there were so many girls in thong sandals...it was hard to figure it out. I only had a quick glance to go by. Also, I asked the wrong girl if she had been the girl theatening me in the bathroom. Then, I realized by her voice and sweet demeanor that it was obviously not her ...she was even willing to help me with this situation and back me up.

We did come to a conclusion, based on footwear and personality, as to who it MAY have been, but I took one look at her and decided that she was too drunk to talk to that night. I thought that it could become even more negative/confrontational in that situation. (At the time, I felt that I was having to restrain my anger.)

I will be investigating...it may not even be her. The next time that I see her, I will be confronting/talking with her personally to iron out any misunderstandings. Maybe that is what this was. Also, I would never post or talk about who it is if I ever find out. I want to resolve things with her on a personal level.

[Nightingale 0]

As a martial arts instructor, I'd be happy to put together a FREE self defense seminar for ANY female (or male!) skydivers in my area (southern california).

I used to teach and help my instructor teach women's self defense seminars through southern california. They're usually an hour and a half long, and go over stuff like:

1. how not to get into a bad situation
2. what to do if you find yourself there anyway.
3. kinds of common attacks and easy defenses (the goal is to get you AWAY, not to beat the crap out of the attacker)

[VanillaSkyGirl 6]

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What happened? There has to be more to this story... people don't just do that for no reason.

I'm sure this incident had somthing to do with a guy. Have any of your male friends broken up with anyone lately?

I have no idea what this was about. I do NOT normally drink, hang out at the bar, nor dance while at Perris. I was with the group from Elsinore who were in the tunnel and a new, unassuming British friend, who had just been there taking pics of us us in the tunnel. He was the one dancing with me and was shocked when I told him what had happened. The other friends of mine were from Missisippi and/or people from Perris or Elsinore, whom I briefly said "hello" to in passing. There is nothing that has to do with any "guy"...you, and anyone else who knows me, know that I am NOT like that at all.

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OR
This is just a theory...please don't take offense

Perhaps they see someone who has gone a long way in the sport in a very short time.

That sounds like a compliment. Thank you...I have had people make remarks about how well I can skydive at such low jump numbers because of the tunnel or whatever. It is often said in a voice that contains a little bit of jealousy, but I am not very good, yet...so I doubt that anyone would actually be "jealous" of my skydiving. Lol.

[QuickDraw 0]

You should have told her to 'talk to the hand' etc..
and explain politely that you've been threatened by much better looking women than her.

And don't forget the "Have a nice day" bit too.

-- Hope you don't die. --

I'm fucking winning

[catfishhunter 1]

Personally I believe in Karma and since i took up skydiving I work really hard on good karma

MAKE EVERY DAY COUNT
Life is Short and we never know how long we are going to have. We must live life to the fullest EVERY DAY. Everything we do should have a greater purpose.

[Brains 2]

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Am I overreacting?

Yes. Forgive me but i don't see how a crazy drunk chic has anything to do with you being attacked from behind by a man.

Never look down on someone, unless they are going down on you.

[tigra 0]

I disagree here. What she described was a very agressive "crazy drunk chick" who did indeed also attack her. She wasn't physically harmed, but she was screamed at and threatened. That would bother anyone, and I can see where it would be very disturbing to someone who had recently been violently attacked.

But, just by posting the story here, and asking/ telling people about it that night, this girl has probably already been "outed". People know who she is. Even large busy dropzones are extremely small communities when you come right down to it, and that kind of behaviour isn't tolerated.

[flyangel2 2]

It looks to me that Rosa isn't over the "incident" that happened in Florida if some stupid drunk can bring back "bad feelings" from an "attack" from a man.

I suggest that she see someone and talk about it, rather then posting how she can't get over it here. Afterall; this is the internet and anyone can read any of these post. And, who here is a licensed Doctor that can help Rosa through this hard time?

May your trails be crooked, winding, lonesome, dangerous, leading to the most amazing view. May your mountains rise into and above the clouds. - Edward Abbey

[VanillaSkyGirl 6]

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It looks to me that Rosa isn't over the "incident" that happened in Florida if some stupid drunk can bring back "bad feelings" from an "attack" from a man.

I suggest that she see someone and talk about it, rather then posting how she can't get over it here. Afterall; this is the internet and anyone can read any of these post. And, who here is a licensed Doctor that can help Rosa through this hard time?

What an interesting thing to write, Mar...people that we all know and care about on DZ.com write about all sorts of intimate things without getting shit for it. I understand your point, though. I hope that this doesn't sound harsh as a response, but I find your post quite telling...more of yourself and perhaps your own issues than of me.

Thank you, anyway, for the suggestion. It may go over better next time if you do not address someone (me) in third person. You can always tell me what you think to my face. I will be seeing you in a couple of weeks in Perris, Mar. Take care.

[tigra 0]

I agree you are probably right! But, if some stranger (psycho) followed me into the bathroom and started screaming at me and threatening me, I'd be more than a little freaked out by it. And I'm not trying to get over a past "incident."

[eeneR 1]

Heya Rosa,

I am pretty sure that Mar was trying to point out to everyone not just you that sometimes things happen in our lives that effect us very dramatically. These things cause huge "wounds" in our minds. With these wounds in place other things will effect us significantly more then they would normally.

It is very possible that said person thought you were someone else, a case of drunken mistaken identity. Or something you did that was harmless she took as something else, people very easily take things and run with them in what ever way there mind see's fit. Not to mention, maybe she recognized you from some where else and is pissed about something else. This is all just speculation on everyones part. All that is known is some girl with flipflops yelled at you in the bathroom and was mean. There is no proof of history. Come on, we all know how women are, dont forget a single thing I know i dont, and i cant stand it. I tend to remember a hell of a lot more then i want to.

Yes DZ.com is a great place to come to, however it is not a replacement for "talking" when things get tradgic. Yes you had some scary shit happen to you, and it is possible that these things are effecting you. I dont think Mar ment it to come across as disrespectful, but more of a blatently honest taste of the truth.

A lot of "well what if this, what if that" is going on, when the truth is it is all speculation, we dont know. Spending hours wondering about something you can do nothing about does not fix it. All it will do is make people more aggitated and agrevated over something that could very well be nothing.

I have been around this block, and hell im still going around it. I have had some shit happen in my life and shitty people come and go. The more i spent dwelling on it the worse it got. Most people run from there problems, or find other things to distract them from them instead of dealing with them. All that happens is those problems re-manifest themselves elsewhere.....

She is not a "Dumb Blonde" - She is a "Light-Haired Detour Off The Information Superhighway."
eeneR
TF#72, FB#4130, Incauto

[VanillaSkyGirl 6]

OK, thank you Eener for your beautifully written post. You are awesome, girl!

Believe it or not, I have been able to find more and more closure when writing about certain things online, but perhaps I shouldn't share my life with the world...lol. Btw, everyone would be shocked at how much I do NOT share about myself online.

Thank you, EVERYONE, who has sent me comforting PMs, especially the last few...

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[NoShitThereIWas 0]

I have one word for you Rosa to describe this person:

L-O-S-E-R!!!!

Sounds like a psycho with some serious issues. You are way too nice a person and too cool to waste your time even caring about someone else like that.

Roy Bacon: "Elvises, light your fires."

Sting: "Be yourself no matter what they say."

[Michele 1]

Hi, swootie

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I hope that this doesn't sound harsh as a response, but I find your post quite telling...more of yourself and perhaps your own issues than of me.

One of the really cool things about Mar is she tells it like it is, no sugar coating, no ego stroking. Just bald face out there. Sometimes it's hard to deal with, but it's always sincere, always from her heart.

I too find it telling, but from a different side of thngs. She cared enough to say it directly. She cares enough to suggest that you may need to get some help dealing with the aftermath of the FLA incident. She cared enough to see if there was a counsellor available here who could help you. She cared enough to post.

Rosa, I wasn't there, I don't know what happened. I do know that trauma, if not addressed, will sneak up and bite your bottom when you least expect it. If it's not addressed, and dealt with, then it will insist on being dealt with in the future.

I've been the victim of attacks several times. Hell, my ex was my most regular attacker...and it took me a long time in counselling to handle it. No shame there...the shame would be letting that control my life in such a way that it affected me in a real, tangible way.

I'm proud of my independence. I'm proud knowing that if I walk to my car unescorted and someone thinks that's an opportunity, they are sadly mistaken (and I'm not talking about being a blackbelt, I'm talking about the self confidence to know I can deal with it should the situation arise again...). I'm proud that I live alone, fear-free...but it took a lot of work to get here.

You are overreacting, if it puts you in fear and inhibits your lifestyle. Is it understandable? Sure. But it's indicative of Post Traumatic Stress disorder, and that, darling swootie, should be addressed.

hugs to you, and I am sorry this happened.

Ciels-
Michele

~Do Angels keep the dreams we seek
While our hearts lie bleeding?~

[flyangel2 2]

Wow, a little hostile

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What an interesting thing to write, Mar...people that we all know and care about on DZ.com write about all sorts of intimate things without getting shit for it.

Wow, I'm sorry if you took that as giving you shit. You posted asking if you were overreacting. You asked for opinions.

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I understand your point, though. I hope that this doesn't sound harsh as a response, but I find your post quite telling...more of yourself and perhaps your own issues than of me.

Sorry, I'm not following that statement. I am very much at peace with my life.

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It may go over better next time if you do not address someone (me) in third person. You can always tell me what you think to my face

I was addressing the poster (tigra) above me and replying to her post about the situation. I thought it would be rude to reply to her and address you.

Oh, and like Michele said, I have and always well address issues to someone face.

May your trails be crooked, winding, lonesome, dangerous, leading to the most amazing view. May your mountains rise into and above the clouds. - Edward Abbey

[VanillaSkyGirl 6]

Thanks Michele.
I live alone. I walk to my car alone, countless times, at night in parking lots...still. I was never going to do that, again, but that is unrealistic for a single woman. I go to new DZs completely by myself and jump with new people all the time with no fear. I am, however, set back to old fears when strange incidents like this happen.

The Florida incident was not the worst that has happened to me, and I got over the prior stuff. I know that this is a healing process, and I will eventually heal as much as possible over the Florida incident, also...but it doesn't happen overnight. However, this incident in Florida was posted first by someone other than me, which is why I eventually posted about it...to clarify the details. Now that people know what happened, it is not a big deal to me, anymore, to talk about it.

I seriously would NEVER have posted about what happened in Florida if many people online hadn't already figured it out ans sent me messages asking me details or if I was ok. Like I said, people online may think that they know about my life, but there is so much that I choose NOT to write about. I certainly don't talk about my private life and friends/family...and much, much more... I am comfortable with what I post and/or do not post. That is my call to make.

This bathroom incident is just fucking bizarre. What can I say?

Also, yes, I tend to over-analyze or obsess about things...the good and the bad...the big and the small. I hate being that way. However, I may be guilty of using this forum as a way to write out my feelings and then move on. Perhaps, it's gotten too personal...I always think for a while before writing this kind of stuff. It still doesn't bother me, but it may help me to figure out who it is or what happened. I already have had much more interesting feedback via PMs than I had expected.

Happy Birthday, again, swootie, and thank you for the kind words and support. (((((((((((((((HUGS)))))))))))))))

[VanillaSkyGirl 6]

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Wow, I'm sorry if you took that as giving you shit. You posted asking if you were overreacting. You asked for opinions.

I also thanked you for your opinion.

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I understand your point, though. I hope that this doesn't sound harsh as a response, but I find your post quite telling...more of yourself and perhaps your own issues than of me.

Well, I was thinking about Michele's post about people getting rid of info. that someone could used against them in real life. Your info. is very limited (good idea) on your personal profile, so I thought that perhaps there was something that you were trying to tell me...which I emphasized with the worried face .

Also, posting ican be so deceptive without hearing people's voices and tone of voice. I wasn't being "hostile" to you either, Mar, just letting you know my views about your response. It's fine...we can speak in person soon.
Some people, myself included, were surprised, I think, by the way that you worded things in your post. Is it just me, or does anyone else have people think that they are being negative or hostile if a post is not completely saturated with smilies?

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[RkyMtnHigh 0]

Hey Rosa,
Hindsight is 20/20, but I've been in a similar situation in the past..and I thought the person thought I was someone else or was talking outloud to themselves and chalked it up to their drunken stooper. Furthermore, I didn't respond. (Perhaps that's the blonde in me). I would almost bet you that if someone asked this girl the next day if she remembered what she said to a stranger in the bathroom that she wouldn't remember a thing. You'll probably never see her again much less recognize each other.

_________________________________________

[FrogNog 1]

Am I the only one who looked at the description of the "mean girl" and thought "cocaine?"

My recommendation different from the personal defense classes is the buddy system. When someone needs a whoopin', it's good to have help. It also feels good when you decline to administer the whoopin' to know you had friends, on hand, keeping you on top.

-=-=-=-=-
Pull.

[Amazon 7]

OMG.. I hope I dont have a similar situation happen when I come to visit Perris at the end of the month.

Its such a big DZ and all...

[VanillaSkyGirl 6]

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Am I overreacting?

Yes. Forgive me but i don't see how a crazy drunk chic has anything to do with you being attacked from behind by a man.

[AirMail 0]

Rosa:

If I remember correctly from my visit to Perris last year, the townies and jumpers don't especially like each other. Perhaps she thought you were a townie and therefore were on her turf and gave you shit for it.

P-

--
It's never too late to have a happy childhood.
Postal Rodriguez, Muff 3342

[Remster 24]

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I go for the new asshole every time.

We missed you AA!


EDIT: Rosa, you have lots of friends at Peris who could look out for you , i'm sure!

Remster