Ya know the movie Vanilla Sky? Well my roommate has a problem somewhat like that...

[tigra 0]

We all want to see the poem!
Just keep your rabbits in a safe place!

[kansasskydiver 0]

Warning NSFW!!!!!!!!!!!! Scroll down to read. I am really not sure if I should do this, Let the buyer beware

and remember no killing kittens












I've never met a guy,
That could give me so many o's in one night,
Or one that uses a parachute,
To jump out of planes and fly.

I don't think I've ever,
Enjoyed giving head so much,
Or have lost all of my senses,
By just one simple touch.

I fantasize about your body,
So much more than I want to,
And I get dizzy with lust,
By every thought of you.

I have never been so obsessed,
With the taste of cum,
But for some damn reason,
I think yours is quite yum.

I try to use my vibrator,
To forget about your muscle,
But it only seems to make me,
Want to have another tussle.

Are you allowed to change your mind,
About not wanting to see someone?
Because if I could just have one more night with you,
We would have so much fun.

I read an article in cosmo,
That included the use of toys,
And I would really like to experiment it with you,
To see if I could give you all kinds of joys.

Oh, how I wish I could,
Spend another night with you,
Without damaging my pride,
Or without feeling so loose.

But for now I will have to do without,
And continue sipping on Coke and Rum,
I am hoping that it will sedate,
My craving for your cum.

<--- See look, pink dolphins DO exist!

[MarkM 0]

Quote

girl: "say... you ever watch those japanese cartoons where the school girls get raped by a giant octopus?"

Alright, now that was fucking funny.

And the poem was a trip too.

[kansasskydiver 0]

I said NOOOOOOOO killing kittens...

it's been 5 mins an no one has replied other than Mark

What are YOU all doing?

<--- See look, pink dolphins DO exist!

[jumper03 0]

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I said NOOOOOOOO killing kittens...

it's been 5 mins an no one has replied other than Mark

What are YOU all doing?

getting as far from Kansas as possible....

Scars remind us that the past is real

[slug 1]

Quote

I said NOOOOOOOO killing kittens...

it's been 5 mins an no one has replied other than Mark

What are YOU all doing?

Waiting for the pics

R.I.P.

[SpeedyGonzales 0]

Quote

Quote

Ok so this is the roommate, and I posting under Kansasskydivers name.

I was wondering why the letters looked so small

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Now who wants to see the poem

me!!!

And there's the short joke!! Knew it was coming sometime.

And I probably should have noticed the NSFW before I read the poem on my work computer!!!

[kansasskydiver 0]

We're working on the messages. Those are the classy ones.

And some of the other emails, but I don't know if those will come out. for those who know me, just freaking come over hahahahah

Oh spoke too soon. She just called again... Pretty good message, something about I'm sorry, I'll forgive you ONLY if you do something for me... then it got ugly...

<--- See look, pink dolphins DO exist!

[BRYANGOESBOOM 0]

LMAO that was freaking great

Not only will you look better, feel better, and fuck better; you'll have significantly increased your life expectancy. --Douva

[Girlfalldown 0]

Still waiting for the emails. Come on! Don't make me beg even more.

--------------

(Do not, I repeat DO NOT, take my posts seriously.)

[wingnut 0]

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Still waiting for the emails

screw the email, i think the voicemail sound much more interesting!!!! but the email would work too... this is one of those instances that yo just can't make up and where real life is actually more interesting than anything else some times.... well okay it is most of the time but this is some funny shit.....

______________________________________
"i have no reader's digest version"

[Viking 0]

no shit dude i wanna hear the voice mails!!!!

I swear you must have footprints on the back of your helmet - chicagoskydiver
My God has a bigger dick than your god -George Carlin

[Tonto 1]

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Actually, I got laid a TON in college, and I don't seem to remember it being an excuse to be disrepectful to anyone, no matter how "crazy" they were...

That's WHY you got laid a ton.

We like people who respect us and who think highly of us. When I see people disrespect others, it's a major turn off, especially if they're people who are doing their jobs, like waiters, for example.

While this thread is entertaining, I think both parties are equally to blame. He may not have invited her into the house, but he did invite her into his bedroom, and should take responsibility for that, and the potential consequences of that, whether they be Pregnancy, AIDS or unwanted emotional entanglement.

But you already know all this.
t

It's the year of the Pig.

[Pawl 0]

I wonder how she would re-act if she knew all this was been made public A mild re-action, I'm sure

"Africa is not for sissies"

[Vallerina 2]

Okay...that wasn't all that dirty!!! I feel let down!

There's a thin line between Saturday night and Sunday morning

[kinney29 0]

This is it. All morning I was looking forward to reading more and I got nothing.

Dang it! We demand more, more emails, more poems, pics, voicemail, anything.

[NWFlyer 2]

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I wonder how she would re-act if she knew all this was been made public A mild re-action, I'm sure

Based on what I've heard, she'd probably take it as an encouraging sign.

"There is only one basic human right, the right to do as you damn well please. And with it comes the only basic human duty, the duty to take the consequences." -P.J. O'Rourke

[kansasskydiver 0]

She's calmed down since yesterday. Only one phone call, one text messasge and an email. The email was ok, and proves that she's got issues. Opening line was "I know we can't be friends anymore but if you still want to have sex with me that's ok"

I'll work on getting permission to post the voicemails, they are truely what's worth it here. The emails are funny, but there's nothing like a 10min message about how it's not right to not screw her when she wants you to

<--- See look, pink dolphins DO exist!

[skymama 35]

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I know we can't be friends anymore but if you still want to have sex with me that's ok"

She obviously has low self-esteem issues. I feel sorry for her and she does need help from friends or a counselor to teach her how to respect herself better or she's going to get herself into a situation with a real creep where she could get beaten, raped or worse. Do you have any mutual female friends who might be able to gently persuade her to get some counseling or to talk to her themselves?

She is Da Man, and you better not mess with Da Man,
because she will lay some keepdown on you faster than, well, really fast. ~Billvon

[kansasskydiver 0]

She's on another site that is for college students in the area and I looked kinda thinking the same thing. I know of one person on her list of friends, though I only know the girl by association, never actually sat down and talked to her.

As the emails continue, the situation is getting a bit more odd than before. She doesn't care that he wont' talk to her, that he doesn't like her, that he won't call or answer the phone. She just doesn't understand why he wont have sex with her when she wants to. She's emailed me again too requesting that I try to knock some sense into him cause all she wants to do is have sex with him. I have no responded nor has he to any of her calls or emails other than the one reply to try to figure out if she was home or not.

<--- See look, pink dolphins DO exist!

[IFallFast 0]

didn't she say something about 30 remaining condoms, and if he helped her use them up she would leave him alone

I like Beans

[SkiD_PL8 0]

Still waiting on e-mails and mp3's to be posted.

Greenie in training.

[Tonto 1]

Low self esteem?

Sub terainian may be a better description.

t

It's the year of the Pig.

[wingnut 0]

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Still waiting on e-mails and mp3's to be posted.

i think it's a lost cause now.. the moment has passed....... unless they proveme wrong.......... this thread was pretty entertainingthough....

______________________________________
"i have no reader's digest version"

[kansasskydiver 0]

Oh they're coming... We had a bbq last night and passed the phone around, so know some other dz.commers can vouche for them as well.

The microphone idea didn't work, so we're gonna get a direct wire to run to the line in of my computer and connect it to the earpiece hole of the cell phone.

Last night however she did send another email requesting we gave her our dog. Not joking, but serious. That and she went to the bars last night to try to find someone else in bed as good as him, but none of the guys wanted to take her home

My roommate responded for the first time to all these emails. Short, sweet and too the point:

"LEAVE ME ALONE!!!"

We'll see what happens next

<--- See look, pink dolphins DO exist!