shah269 0 #1 September 8, 2011 There is a point where every man decides to take matters into his own hands....and the results are either parts all over the work bench or something....amazing. I KILLED that pesky ratcheting sound my mouse made. One man, two cups of coffee, one salted bagel, one can of red bull, a screw driver, a dozen neodymium magnets a virigin....easy to find in an engineering office and a dead chicken.....and tada! QUIET! I really have no idea what they were thinking when they developed such a horrible design? Yes we will take the quietest piece of equipment on a desk and mate it with a toy infants play with and TADA! A loud mouse that not only grades your nerves but also leaves your finger number after a few minutes of use on multi page excel spread sheets and power points.......I know I said I would be nice to engineers and fat chicks this month but would it be ok if I said that I would love to find the dumb ass who thought up this idea and shoot the control freak engineer square in the nuts...twice! And now back to a quiet mouse!Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AggieDave 6 #2 September 8, 2011 I really miss those old IBM AT keyboards. The ones with the spring backed keys, not rubber backed. A spring that took 5lbs of pressure to press, with a SOLID click. I type quite quickly (a little out of practice, hovering around 80-90wpm) and loved typing on that keyboard. Sounded like a machine gun!--"When I die, may I be surrounded by scattered chrome and burning gasoline." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nutz 0 #3 September 8, 2011 Uh, I believe an optical usb mouse is less than $10. Just sayin'. "Don't! Get! Eliminated!" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #4 September 8, 2011 Quote Uh, I believe an optical usb mouse is less than $10. Just sayin'. Try optical wireless! It's that pesky sound the roller makes ever time you scroll up and down! Now it's whisper quiet! I am A GOD!Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wayneflorida 0 #5 September 8, 2011 You know there are for sale these little mouses that are noiseless and have colorful lights for not much money. I know how it fells to take something apart and spend probably more time than it is worth to fix something. It is sucessGives you a sense of worth.Have another begal. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hokierower 0 #6 September 8, 2011 You seem to have a lot of little problems that you blow WAYYYY out of proportion. No wonder you're having problems finding a sub size 8 woman if you go apoplectic over a simple input device. Just an observation. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #7 September 8, 2011 I have no clue why but from the catalog we order from all the the mousse have this horrible ratcheting feature on their scroll wheel. Of the 4 I've ordered all seem to have this. So today.....I took matters into my own hand. And now it's quiet.....bighting lip about going off on computer engineers being dorks......not easy but I will do it!Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryoder 1,400 #8 September 8, 2011 Why the hell are you using a mouse? Use an optical trackball like modern people. "There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #9 September 8, 2011 Quote Why the hell are you using a mouse? Use an optical trackball like modern people. Track ball....really? God it feeeeeellllllzzzzzzz so good! And quiet! No more click click click click click every time i review a document. What the hell were these people thinking when they made that pesky clicker? I know on a very good day your average engineer is totally out of touch with reality and trying to lick the ass of the nearest size 14 girl........oh better stop that i made a promice......but why did they ever instal that rachet system? It does nothing but make nouse and give you a fracked up finger?Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryoder 1,400 #10 September 8, 2011 Gotta hand it to yah, Shah. Not many people can drag dress sizes into a thread about computer pointing devices. "There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #11 September 8, 2011 Quote Gotta hand it to yah, Shah. Not many people can drag dress sizes into a thread about computer pointing devices. Look I'm trying to be good for 30 days! Im not going to be mean to engineers or + sized ladies! Do you know how hard that is!? That's like having a loaded gun and not shooting someone! Or some thing! any how i didn't bring dress size into this, blame the guy above who said something about size 8 girls.Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryoder 1,400 #12 September 8, 2011 One of these days we're going to learn that Shah is just like those family-values-politicians and/or televangelists; The things they condemn the most are the things they are doing themselves in secret. i.e. Shah is secretly attracted to the big ladies and cruises the BBW websites. "There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #13 September 8, 2011 Quote One of these days we're going to learn that Shah is just like those family-values-politicians and/or televangelists; The things they condemn the most are the things they are doing themselves in secret. i.e. Shah is secretly attracted to the big ladies and cruises the BBW websites. Yeah RIGHT! Ever play chicken? Well here is my gig, I'm playing chicken but I've hand cuffed myself to the wheel. Due to having a good looking x wife I have to do better than what I had, to prove to her that she was not the best i could do. That and i could never look my mother in the eye if i ever came home with some + sized woman. She would be very very very disappointed in me. And to top it off....yeah I have tried to date larger girls, and engineering and science girls and well......there was just no attraction for me. Not saying that they were bad people but......we just had nothing in common. As such, hope. And good god does that mouse feel good! Quiet as a mouse should be! None of this fracking click click click as I review documents. Now everyone in my office wants me to "mod" their mouse :-) And no I looked around the web and apparently most low end low cost mousses have this horrible feature.Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Coreece 190 #14 September 8, 2011 Quote Quote having a good looking x wife I have to do better than what I had, to prove to her Quote i could never look my mother in the eye if i ever came home with some + sized woman. She would be very very very disappointed in me. Good God man...No wonder you're so miserable. What a horrible way to live.Your secrets are the true reflection of who you really are... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #15 September 8, 2011 Quote Quote Quote having a good looking x wife I have to do better than what I had, to prove to her Quote i could never look my mother in the eye if i ever came home with some + sized woman. She would be very very very disappointed in me. Good God man...No wonder you're so miserable. What a horrible way to live. Hey, it's simple, you downgrage, let me know how it works for you and if you look happy I'll give it a shot. But for me, at the moment it's a simple issue....smarter, taller, thinner and hotter. The perfect FU to the X. And as for mom, we three boys had three rules growing up. 1) NO MOMS! 2) NO FAT CHICKS! 3) NO PERSIAN GIRLS! And we take that seriously, that and I don't ever want to sit at the dinner table and look at my other brothers and think "Wait if i had tired a little harder would the girl next to me be as hot as the girls next to them?" FRACK NO! God my finger feels great! Why did they ever put that little freaking in the scroll wheel! It can't be good for your fingers?Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #16 September 8, 2011 You know when it's just you in the office, and you are reading document after document.....the quiet mouse.....really just makes things so much better. Still can't figure out why they put that horrible sound making device in the mouse?Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AggieDave 6 #17 September 8, 2011 Quote You know when it's just you in the office, and you are reading document after document.....the quiet mouse.....really just makes things so much better. Still can't figure out why they put that horrible sound making device in the mouse? That is why it is fun to change someone's mouse click sound on Windows to something very loud and very annoying! Also fun if that sound is unusually long.--"When I die, may I be surrounded by scattered chrome and burning gasoline." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #18 September 9, 2011 Quote Quote You know when it's just you in the office, and you are reading document after document.....the quiet mouse.....really just makes things so much better. Still can't figure out why they put that horrible sound making device in the mouse? That is why it is fun to change someone's mouse click sound on Windows to something very loud and very annoying! Also fun if that sound is unusually long. Man that is EVIL! I was in the office till about 7 tonight reviewing contracts. And let me tell you simply being able to scroll around with out that horrible click click click sound you get was just so nice on the mind. But now I'm home and well......I can't "fix" this one. No way to open it up and remove the offending piece of steel that sits inside the scroll wheel.Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hcsvader 1 #19 September 9, 2011 Quote You know when it's just you in the office, and you are reading document after document..... Nah dude, I dont sit in front of anything all day reading. I play with steel, electricity and fire. I build stuff and cut stuff apart. When a piece of my equipment is bothering me at work I can hit it with a big hammer and feel better instantly. Have you seen my pants? it"s a rough life, Livin' the dream >:) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nigel99 150 #20 September 9, 2011 Quote Gotta hand it to yah, Shah. Not many people can drag dress sizes into a thread about computer pointing devices. He needed to silence his mouse so he could cruise the porn sites (not that Cosmo is typical male porn) without attracting attention.Experienced jumper - someone who has made mistakes more often than I have and lived. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MikeJD 0 #21 September 9, 2011 It never occurs to me to use the scroll wheel on my mouse. Now that I feel compelled to, I can report that it makes no noise at all. Microsoft Wireless Mobile Mouse 4000. Recommended for those with a low tolerance for scroll wheel noise. This thread reminds me of the guy I read about recently who could hear his eyeballs moving in his skull. He's since had ear surgery that's fixed the problem, but really - count yourself lucky. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryoder 1,400 #22 September 9, 2011 News that will astonish Shah:http://www.news.com.au/national/when-it-comes-to-choosing-a-partner-boys-do-prefer-the-good-sorts/story-e6frfkvr-1226132714811"There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #23 September 9, 2011 QuoteIt never occurs to me to use the scroll wheel on my mouse. Now that I feel compelled to, I can report that it makes no noise at all. Microsoft Wireless Mobile Mouse 4000. Recommended for those with a low tolerance for scroll wheel noise. Where I work I can only order office supplies form a few given vendors. I will look to see if that model is available. From what I can tell the low end models, which I have to buy for the office as well as what came with my latest Dell desk top all have this ratcheting mechanism built in. I'm just guessing it was cheaper than dampened bearings or something? Who knows. All I can say is that when you are scrolling though documents and various presentations after a while it can grade on ones nerves. And thus I had that pesky piece of wiring removed and now the office is much quieter and I'll be honest my index finger feels a little better. How can I express this....imagine driving your car on the rumble strips of the highway....sure it's fun but after a while you do want it to be quiet. And well that's what it's like. A quiet ride. now i have no idea how this thread morphed into one talking about girls but......ok why not let it ride. That said i liked this part of the article; Quote"It may be they have matured through political correctness and have been socialised not to say everything they think," Mr Jones said. AKA the dude is dumb enough to think that if he says the right few words regarding a bunch of BS he may have a better chance of getting laid. I see this mostly in engineering offices, labs, my local drop zone and other places where there are 52 dudes and 2 chicks. It's the opposite of the Andy Dick effect. Either you have hyper masculinity, chest puffing, acts of strength and over all rude behavior or you get what best can be described as hyper Emocrapness....Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MikeJD 0 #24 September 9, 2011 Quote All I can say is that when you are scrolling though documents and various presentations after a while it can grade on ones nerves. Yeah, but again - nothing compared to having to listen to your eyes slide left and right. The guy said in the article that watching tennis had been a nightmare. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shah269 0 #25 September 9, 2011 QuoteQuote All I can say is that when you are scrolling though documents and various presentations after a while it can grade on ones nerves. Yeah, but again - nothing compared to having to listen to your eyes slide left and right. The guy said in the article that watching tennis had been a nightmare. nah man it was loud as hell. loud enough that if i was on the phone people could hear it.Life through good thoughts, good words, and good deeds is necessary to ensure happiness and to keep chaos at bay. The only thing that falls from the sky is birdshit and fools! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
