Nataly 38 #1 August 20, 2012 Nearly a year ago I met someone I went on a couple of dates with. I eventually communicated very clearly to him that we were incompatible even as friends, and that I did not intend to stay in touch with him. At first he called/emailed. I answered some of these with polite discouragement. Then I was less polite. Then I stopped answering. He had stopped writing but this evening he called. I didn't recognise the number so I answered. I suppose I could have just hung up, but I find it hard to be quite so harsh. I thus spent about 20 minutes repeating that there was nothing between us, that there would never be, that I am happily in a relationship and even if I wasn't I would not entertain the notion of going out with him, blah, blah. (Yes, I could have been more brief.) I'm not sure how I could get the message across more effectively??? Open to suggestions (even if they are not entirely serious - comic relief is always appreciated "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jtval 0 #2 August 20, 2012 one night stand will fix it.My photos My Videos Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryoder 1,397 #3 August 20, 2012 Well, it just felt good to hear your voice again. "There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
airtwardo 6 #4 August 20, 2012 mace ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nataly 38 #5 August 20, 2012 Quote mace "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LuckyMcSwervy 0 #6 August 20, 2012 I voted the for the "direct but polite" option. I just had to deal with this myself. Not fun hearing someone repeatedly tell me how many women like them/hit on them/come out of the bathroom naked for them/etc. Quite disturbing and reeked of desperation, IMHO. Believe me, if the attraction is mutual, they'll know it. Good luck!! Always be kinder than you feel. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
airtwardo 6 #7 August 20, 2012 Not fun hearing someone repeatedly tell me how many women like them/hit on them/come out of the bathroom naked for them/etc. Quote I was KIDDING! ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
LuckyMcSwervy 0 #8 August 20, 2012 Quote Not fun hearing someone repeatedly tell me how many women like them/hit on them/come out of the bathroom naked for them/etc. Quote I was KIDDING! Always be kinder than you feel. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nataly 38 #9 August 20, 2012 Quote Well, it just felt good to hear your voice again. Reckon if you ever met me in person, the fantasy would not correspond to reality... Which is why we should NEVER meet!!! "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryoder 1,397 #10 August 20, 2012 Quote Quote Well, it just felt good to hear your voice again. Reckon if you ever met me in person, the fantasy would not correspond to reality... Which is why we should NEVER meet!!! I'm Merkun; We *all* go cuckoo over a French accent."There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jtval 0 #11 August 20, 2012 Ok REAL ANSWER? restraining order. Tell them "look, I tried to be honest with you. I told you we are not compatible. I told you I am not interested in being friends. You've disregarded this and now, you're starting to scare me. If you contact me again I will file a harassment charge and issue a restraining order." 'twardo, She needs her space, man. leave her alone for a while My photos My Videos Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
airtwardo 6 #12 August 20, 2012 Quote Quote Quote Well, it just felt good to hear your voice again. Reckon if you ever met me in person, the fantasy would not correspond to reality... Which is why we should NEVER meet!!! I'm Merkun; We *all* go cuckoo over a French accent. My wife speaks fluent French having lived there for years and flyin' into Paris every month. When she speaks to ME in French...I gotta funny feelin' I don't really wanna KNOW what she's sayin'!! ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nataly 38 #13 August 20, 2012 Quote Quote Quote Well, it just felt good to hear your voice again. Reckon if you ever met me in person, the fantasy would not correspond to reality... Which is why we should NEVER meet!!! I'm Merkun; We *all* go cuckoo over a French accent. I am sorry to inform you that I don't have a French accent. Not even when I speak French!! (Remi can confirm!)"There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ryoder 1,397 #14 August 20, 2012 Quote I am sorry to inform you that I don't have a French accent. Not even when I speak French!! (Remi can confirm!) Another fantasy shot to hell."There are only three things of value: younger women, faster airplanes, and bigger crocodiles" - Arthur Jones. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Southern_Man 0 #15 August 20, 2012 Quote I am sorry to inform you that I don't have a French accent. Not even when I speak French!! (Remi can confirm!) The French Maid outfit will suffice..."What if there were no hypothetical questions?" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cocheese 0 #16 August 20, 2012 I know boobies are a required choice in these polls, but they rarely help to discourage a one-way love interest. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nataly 38 #17 August 20, 2012 Quote Quote I am sorry to inform you that I don't have a French accent. Not even when I speak French!! (Remi can confirm!) Another fantasy shot to hell. Au contraire... A fantasy by definition is not real... So you are free to imagine me any way you like Just don't confuse it with "reality" "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nataly 38 #18 August 20, 2012 Quote I know boobies are a required choice in these polls, but they rarely help to discourage a one-way love interest. "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
obelixtim 100 #19 August 20, 2012 Tell him you're a katoey....My computer beat me at chess, It was no match for me at kickboxing.... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
theonlyski 3 #20 August 20, 2012 Quote Ok REAL ANSWER? restraining order. Nothin says "I love you" quite like an order to cease and desist. "I may be a dirty pirate hooker...but I'm not about to go stand on the corner." iluvtofly DPH -7, TDS 578, Muff 5153, SCR 14890 I'm an asshole, and I approve this message Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
airtwardo 6 #21 August 20, 2012 Quote Quote Ok REAL ANSWER? restraining order. Nothin says "I love you" quite like an order to cease and desist. Yeah but mace is cheaper... ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
airtwardo 6 #22 August 21, 2012 Tell them "look, I tried to be honest with you. I told you we are not compatible. I told you I am not interested in being friends. Quote http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=yCFB2akLh4s ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
nigel99 144 #23 August 21, 2012 The best thing is to completely ignore the person and remove all contact. For desperate people even negative contact is still a form of connection and they will take any kindness or gentleness as a positive sign. There is a fair bit of evidence that restraining orders can just up the level and take things in a dangerous direction. So my take is don't answer emails, phone calls AT ALL. After a month or two he'll find someone else to obsess over.Experienced jumper - someone who has made mistakes more often than I have and lived. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DiverMike 5 #24 August 21, 2012 QuoteThe best thing is to completely ignore the person and remove all contact +1 It is like getting a phone call indicating you just won a free vacation to the bahamas. Just say two words: "Not interested" and hang up. For the same reason I jump off a perfectly good diving board. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Fearjoburg 0 #25 August 21, 2012 Go to a place where you know this guy will be with your Boyfriend. Then make out on a spot where the dude will spot you. After that get a room, fire up the gopro and post the video on dz.com Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
