Feeblemind

Work = cash converted to Skydiving than Fire Safety Tip: Don't fry bacon while naked

Nope Fire Safety Tip: Don't fry bacon while naked

Yes I met the mud!! Fire Safety Tip: Don't fry bacon while naked

Tattoos are personal to me. i have one of the tazmanian devil barefoot water skiing on my right ankle (to tired to get the camera to take apic) My next one will be him skydiving!!! Fire Safety Tip: Don't fry bacon while naked

You are obviously a Parish Island Marine or your DI was one. My father was a Parish Island DI and I am going to send this post to him. He is almost 70 and it will fill his heart with pride that the tradition lives on and on and on!! I have a newspaper clip from the week I was born, I was not expected to live as an infant in 1966 (was very premature) but my father still conducted his inspection!! Thanks for you service and protecting my freedoms!!! Fire Safety Tip: Don't fry bacon while naked

I know mine was, but from my side of the harness Fire Safety Tip: Don't fry bacon while naked

I hope your just confusing some of the signals from others that you were given, because if not someone using the signals as you distribed is seriously F**ked Up and giving the wrong ones from the AFFI sylibus. Very true

That wouldn't be the "Tube Exit" I saw you had wrote in your log book now would it? Keepin' it safe! Ed Yep that would be the one!! I was expanding my horizons Phil Fire Safety Tip: Don't fry bacon while naked

So the journey continues..... Sunday headed out to the DZ on a perfect day for skydiving!! I arrive and head to the loft to rent my gear (mine still being manufactured). Well, Mr. Murphy hadn't caught his plane to Deland yet and decided to slap me in the head one last time. Another jumper was there right at 9am. Well I am the patient type (yea right!!) So I just went to the packing area. I spent the morning Packing and repacking a friends chute (Idle time is a bad thing as a student in my opinion) Only problem I have is with my bad knees. When it come to stuffing the bag my knees flat scream (I am looking and accepting alternatives, but so far folks have said your gonna hurt alot till you get proficient at packing). Well she stuffed it in the bag to help out my aching knees and then I finished it up under her supervision (BTW she is a rigger). When I was done I said thanks let me get it out so you can pack it since your load was coming up. She said nope, I am gonna jump it as is. Well her load got called and I was still waiting for gear so I cruised on out to the landing area. As the plae went over head I said a little pray "please Lord let it open, I really don't want my friend hurt" Well needless to say that was the longest jump run I ever watched!!! I finally found her thimble ass falling through the the sky as she deployed. All I could say was OPEN, OPEN, OPEN!!! Well it did and man was I ever relieved. She said it opened a little funky (I didn't dare ask for a description) but said it was fine, and here go repack it . Off to the hangar where I started packing. I was about half way done when my rig became available, WooHoo I get to go skydiving, Mr. Murphy better have his ass on his way to Deland! She finished up as I got my gear on and we manifested. I am prett forunate that my friends are all AFFI or coaches. We did a brief dirt dive and off to the plane we went. On exit I had an AFFI on one side and a coach on the other (DAMN THIS IS FUN!!) Being te new guy I place my hips in start the count...out, in, out and ARCH!!!! Horaay I am gonna be belly to earth in about 1 seco.... (Mr. Murphy slapped me in the head on his way out of town) I feel a tug on my right shoulder and poof I am on my back, DAMMIT!! Well we knew this was a possibility so we broke immediately and they all back slide away from me as I half barrel rolled back to me belly. Once back on my belly they docked me, broke, 90, redock, broke, redock in a round, broke, turn 90 and redock. I look at my altimiter and I am at 6000. We broke at 5000 they tracked away, wave and deployed. I enter the pattern and all is well to the point I am almost on the ground. I haven't mastered the 9 cell glide slope yet so I PLF (Knees are still bad and I have 5 hours left of daylight!!). I hoof it back to the barn for re-pack so I can get back up in the air. Next jump is me and an AFFI (gotta get items Signed off you know) we cover the dive flow and head to the plane. I bomb out the door doing front loops then get stable and check my altitude. Instructor comes in front of me and then drops about 10' low, I swoop down and dock (woo hoo I did it!) I release, check my altitude as he back slides away and drops down a little further, I swoop down again and dock again (YEEHAW!!) and then check altitude. I break and he back slides the flips onto his back. I get the follow me hand signal and were off to the races tracking, zoooooooom tracking through the sky. I count in my head and figure time to check altitude. My timing was a little early (altitude is my friend) but I just arched to get good and stable. I wave and pull and had an uneventful deployment and canopy ride. Landings are getting closer just not there yet. The next jump I made I will leave out of this post, but it was another coach jump . Sunset load was a tracking jump with an instructor. On this jump I was to de arch during the track a little to prevent me from going head down so much. Man this was a kick in the pants. I know he was dogging it so I could keep up, but it was alot of fun for me. Again I had a good deployment, I am still fighting the 9-cell glide slope but getting closer. I am however landing very close to my targets. Well I pack up and hoof it back to the hangar (My landng area is further south from the main so it adds about 300 yards to the barn). Well since I pull high and play around the light is on and I am late!! By the time I hit the fridge only 3 's are left from the case I brought for my one of my 1st's. Whew just in time!!! Log books, sign offs and de-briefing. Then off to the planefield for a snack and another cold . I feel very fortunate to be jumping with the caliber of folks I have gone out the door with. They have all been very friendly ad helpful. Sometmes they chew a little of my ass but I know the are correcting mistakes that I don't wanna make twice. I only have 6 more to go then I will close this novel, hope you all enjoyed my post and have a bitchin' day. Blue Skys, Phil Fire Safety Tip: Don't fry bacon while naked

I have no answer for you unfortunately. However, I would like to thank you for your service!! It is folks like you that allow the rest of us to sleep under a blanket of freedom and voice are opinions regarding anything and everything. Stay safe and may all our fallen brothers/sisters look over you while you are in Iraq. Phil Fire Safety Tip: Don't fry bacon while naked

38 Fire Safety Tip: Don't fry bacon while naked

[Reply]I just did my first AFF jump yesterday and I didn't realize that there are so many things to accomplish for your jumpmasters to send you to the next step. Is there any way I can do anything on the ground to help me realy prepare because money is an issue and I can't afford to repeat very many levels. I hate to sound like a pessimist, but expect to repeat. How many depends on you as an individual. I recently completed AFF so I will offer my meager opinion. 1st) If at all possible find a primary instructor that will take you through your entire AFF course. I was fortunate to have bodypilot1 (Ed Pawlowski)as my instructor from start to finish. By having one instructor, he/she knows your strengths and weakness and can you help you correct them as they arise. Ed and I also dirt dived the dive flow several times at the mock up before boarding the plane. I had to be able to tell him the dive flow from start to finish without prompting. 2nd) Try and get the AFFI's to video your jumps. I found this as a very valuable tool after each jump. Ed debriefed me after each jump and explained to me how to correct my weaknesses. 3rd) Save up a little extra cash if you can before you start or be willing to finance your jumps on a credit card if need be. I don't know if you have exit anxiety, but I know I did. It helped me to be going out the door two or three times a day over a three week time frame. This allowed me to be comfortable exiting and all the things I was being taught were fresh in my mind. I personally had to repeat two skydives, but I am glad I did. 4th) As said before relax and have fun!!! Here is a little post I made as I reflected back on my journey, sorry I don’t know how to make a clicky http://www.dropzone.com/cgi-bin/forum/gforum.cgi?post=1508251;search_string=brief;#1508251 Fire Safety Tip: Don't fry bacon while naked

Sorry and my condolences for all involved. Michelle, fly free and watch over us. Fire Safety Tip: Don't fry bacon while naked

Because most of us are desendants from immigrants from one country or another. For the most part the only true american would be a pure blooded american indian (but i doubt there are many of them left) But when asked my nationality i am an American. and my ethinticity is Mutt Fire Safety Tip: Don't fry bacon while naked

Me too Fire Safety Tip: Don't fry bacon while naked

I prepaid my rigger with a bottle!! My rig is slated to arrive next week, I figured i would pay him in advance for good karma. Phil Fire Safety Tip: Don't fry bacon while naked

As my father taught me Don't shit where you eat Fire Safety Tip: Don't fry bacon while naked

Fire Safety Tip: Don't fry bacon while naked

ROFLMAO!!! Fire Safety Tip: Don't fry bacon while naked

Try the minimum time, you can always add time. Why is it this always occurs when the firefighter just sits down in the restroom? nothing worse than tiger striping some skivies for someone who can't cook popcorn Fire Safety Tip: Don't fry bacon while naked

Well I know I got the 1st one you ever made!!! I will make sure I consult you before I order my next suit and if I forge I will buy the . I will be out sunday morning, gonna try and make 11 jumps, thinks that will be possible? Fire Safety Tip: Don't fry bacon while naked

If you really wanna torture him wear a sher top with no bra and a mini skirt with a thong. If you have to bend over alot picking stuff off the floor, that will be really make things HARD on him lol to be totally cruel, hide all forms of lubericant in the house!! Fire Safety Tip: Don't fry bacon while naked

I know a rigger that can fix that rig up in a jiffy!! HHHmmmmm what could you do for him in return?!?! Fire Safety Tip: Don't fry bacon while naked

Well out to the DZ I wnet today. Mother nature tickled my ass a bit, but wan't in the mood to screw me (typical woman ) Went to lunch with a few folk from the DZ and stood around watching mother nature torture me. Finally we got the 15 minute call, Woot! My two friends and I pile in the 182 and are off on our jump run (I now know what all those pockets for are in my free fly suit, places to put cards so we have something to do why we climb ) Instead I reviewed handles an my Ep's agan and again, this was my 1st 182 exit (I am kinda spoiled, got lucky over the past few weeks with turbine loads) so you all know I was a litle uneasy. Well my friends are practicing AFF precourse so they bailed 1st. I climb out and I am practicing for my 5500 hop/pop. I look at the spot looks good so I release (that was stupid, I looked at the ground and de-arched!!) I recovered and stayed in freefall. (HELLO Mr. Murphy so glad you wanted to skydive today you asshole!!) I am now heading right towards a cloud!! Okies track your ass away! Arms go back and I am off to the races!! ZOOOOOOOM! I check altitude and Mr. Murphy was in the mood for a Rodeo!!! As I looked I was at my pull altitude and I am right above this damn cloud (Ed's voice went off in my head....Pull, Pull on time, Pull stable) I arched and pulled as my diter (set 500 feet low, don't want to depend on it as a student) sang out it's 1st tone. Pull one thousand, Pull two thousand, look up. Mr. Murphy leave my white, hairy pimply ass alone would ya!!!! I am twisted up like a son of a bitch and getting ready to enter a cloud!! Shit Shit Shit!! I check altitude, pry my risers apart and kick like I am the star of a Bruce Lee movie. oh thats not enough Mr. Murphy adds a little spin to the mix (Ed's voice again enters my head... are you making progress or just wasting time? chop this pig or can you recover?) Well I was making progress so I kicked and kicked. I cleared the twists right as I entered the cloud (I had no choice due to the twists). The cloud was small so that stress was brief. I entered the pattern and set up to land. Well the wind was at about 10 mph and Mr. Murphy was having way to much fun with me. I flared just a smedge early and started to climb. My natural reaction was to release pressure on the toggles, at about half way my friends jason's voice activated in my head (DON'T FULLY RELEASE TOGGLE PRESSURE ON AN EARLY FLARE, YOU MIGHT FEMUR YOURSELF) Well I held half brakes an went semi ass over tea kettle in te mud!! Mr. Murphy you cock breath, I just got my new freefly suit all muddy. Well at least I wasn't alone with Mr. Murphy, seems he rode with my friends as well on their sky dives, but that is their story to tell. We packed up and headed up for my 5500 hop/pop. That went rather well except for the need to pump the brakes a bit to get the canopy to fully inflate sub-terminal. I need 10 more jumps and some sign offs to get my "A". I plan on jumping on Sunday (wife gave me permission and I here Murphy is at Deland so I should be golden. Stay safe and blue skys, Phil Fire Safety Tip: Don't fry bacon while naked

I enjoyed this journey so much that I thought I would share my brief skydiving life with you all. I went to the DZ with my Bud Jason, thought I would take a few photos and such. As he arrived at the house he said "Better grab a sweatshirt, it's cold at altitude" Well I said I won't be at altitude so I am safe . We arrive at the DZ and he introduced me to his friends. They were all packing up to make a load so there wasn't alot of conversation. The all piled into the PAC and here the whuffo sat waiting to see what all this hype was about. I sat on these large spools waiting for the jump run then spotted the plane just as they started to exit. Of course I could not see what was going on in free fall, but then all the canopies started opening and swooping began. I was pretty impresed with the canopy stuff (due to the fact it is all I saw) and talked with Jason about it briefly. Well than the fur and insults started to come my way for not wanting to do a tandem. I was doing okay with all the fellars insulting me, figured they were just busting my chops. Well the Skykimmer chimed in and called me a "Pussy". Well now my ego is in the way and up we went. I was like most others on their 1st tandem (WTF am I doing?) well that was the last thought I had as we exited..... oh shit oh shit oh shit I really hope this damn thing works!!!!! Wow this is prety kewl and I really wish I would have worn a sweatshirt, I am freezing my ass off. The time flew and poof (FUCK THAT HURT!!) were under canopy. JP gave me the nickle tour and let me touch some clouds. After the landing I thanked JP and he gave me a copy of the jump. Well I hung out at the DZ a few times sniffing around to see if this was something I actually wanted to do. I came out into these forums and asked lots of questions as well. I fnally made the decision to do AFF and had to find a program. For numerous reasons I ended up selecting Ed Pawlowski (A.K.A. Bodypilot1) as my instructor. I saved up the cash and off Jason and I went to Lodi for the 1st jump in my TAFF progression. Ed was awesome (there is something to be said about one on one instruction!!!) We covered the entire tandem dive flow, practiced it on the mockup and then out we went to the king air. Yes I was still nervous, but at least this time I wore a sweat shirt!!! Out we went and completed are dive flow, looking at the altimeter new what was coming, pull (OUCH THAT FUCKING HURTS!!) Poof were under canopy and after the controlablity check I get the toggles. I did a few 90 degree and 180 degree turns as well as some soft flares. Ed coachd me the whole time. Well it was time to enter the student pattern. I entered the check points as directed and actually got us on a decent final approach when Ed took over to Land us. We side n on te grass without so much as a thump. We reviewed the and discussed the dive and then proceeded to discuss the next dive flow. Eventhough the 1st tandem was a "Working" Tandem, this tandem had much more involved. Ed set forth the dive flow and we reviewed it several times. He affixed a "Dummy Ripcord" to me so he could see that I pulled on time. Well back in the king air we went and out we went at 13,000 again WHEEEEEEEEEE!!!! I get the thumbs up and perform the dive flow. Well Ed gives me the circle of awarenes sign, yep were at 5500 and I am having fun, Next I get the sigh again with an index finger pointing at it (hey, I just checked that were at 5000 and I am having a great time, thanks for checking....POOF (OUCH THAT FUCKING HURTS) oh oh I forgot something in the dive flow (DOH!!) Well keep going, after the controlability check I get the toggles again to perform basic canopy work and enter us into the landing pattern. Agan, once I had us lined up on final Ed softly landed us n the grass. He said the dive was going great up to the point that I forgot to pull and either died or had a cypres fire. He then advised that I needed to repeat the dive. Well knowing that Mr. Murphy was coming skydiving, I had brought extra cash. I learned a very valuable lesson though about staying altitude aware, now everytime I look at my altimiter I say the number to myself. We debriefed and prepped for the next tandem. Back up we go and another exit at 13,000. Thumbs up, so I begine the dive flow. Carefully watching my altitude as I performed my requirements we hit 7,000, no more manuevers. At 6,000 I wave and at 5500 I pull the dummy cord and yes (OUCH THAT FUCKING HURTS!!!), three tandms in one day is really hard on the ol' inner portion of the legs. Once again canopy work and set up for landing. Ed puts us on the ground softly again. Much better this time he said, time to move on!! The following week Ed put me through FJC (again one on one instruction is the way to go!!) After we were done we agreed to meet at the DZ if the weather allowed. Well I got lucky and mother nature was kind. After arriving at the DZ Ed briefed me on the exit, dive flow and landing pattern. Well suited up, did our gear checks (me like 6 times) and out to the king air we went. Man was I nervous on this dive! All the other times I went out the door I was attached to someone I KNEW was going to get down alive, now I was on my own. On the way up I touched my handles then reviewed EP's in my head. I repated that all the way up to altitude. Well the time was here, I got in the doorway, check in, ready, prop (out, in and then out we went) I got a hand signal, but I was in my own little world so I stared the dive flow. This resulted in a firm hand signal (DO WHAT I AM TELLING YOU!!!!) oh, okay legs out. Thumbs up, three practice touches (damn I am glad he is here). Altitude check, thumbs up, (Holy shit he let me go) I am a potatoe chip yes I am, nope I am a spinning potatoe chip, round and round I went (fuck I moved my arms the other way but I am still spinning, shit shit shit!!! 7000 feet you better get your shit together or you will get your 1st experience with line twists. Thump a hand on the leg and the world stopped spinning (whew!) 6000 feet I waved and Pull. Poof (ahhhh that was much nicer than the tandems!!) Look up, good square canopy. Release the brakes, flare, look left turn left 180, look right, turn right 180; good canopy head to your play area. proceed to my predesignated area and start on my canopy work 90, 180 and lots of practice flares. Well 1300 feet head to the check point one. I entered the pattern and landed a little long. Ed Debriefed the skydive. He pointed out it was my right leg that was causing the spin. All in all it was an okay 1st dive, but due to the fact I could not get stable I would have to repeat. Well I knew this would happen also, so back to the slush fund. We repeated the same dive flow, checked our gear, suited up and headed out. Same ride up for me, handle checks and EP's. Same exit as well. I get my thumbs up do my practice touches and check my altitude. I get another thumbs up and I am released. I start to chip alittle as well as spin but this time I correct it. I peform the dive flow but start to spin again (DAMMIT) right then Ed gives me the signal to look at him (holy shit is something wrong?) I stop chipping and spinning to see what the hell I need to to so I don't screw up the dive!! He smile gives me a thumbs up and altitude check. I check my altitude 7000 (I am scratching my head, WTF was that about? 6000 wave, 5500 pull. I check the canopy, good and square, perform controlability and head to my play area. Same manuvers as before. I enter the pattern and land (actually landed where I wanted to). I hook up with Ed and he is smiling as he says great job. I am totally confused, pick up my chute and head to the barn. Ed debriefs the video with me and said I was doing well. When I started into another chip spin he gave me the sign to look at him, he gave that to me knowing I would do what it took to look and then he said "look your stable!) well you tricky little shit