Faicon9493

Correction: Some individuals, not all individuals.

I was reminded that lawn darts were banned after the deaths of three children. Did the ban happen because it was the right thing to do or did it happen because there was no National Lawn Dart Association with the cash to buy politicians?

The Mother Superior called a meeting of the nuns in the convent and said, “Today is the day we paint all the rooms in the convent. I have paired you up and given you all a designated room to paint. Just be careful to not get paint on your habits.” Two of the nuns went to their assigned room and one nun said, “How are we going to do this without getting paint on our habits?” The other nun said, “Well, since it’s just us in the room, I suggest we paint naked.” The other nun agreed and they took off their habits and started painting. All of a sudden, there was a knock at the door and a man’s voice said, “Blind man!” The nuns froze and stared at each other. Once again, a man’s voice said, “Blind man!” One nun said to the other, “He said he was blind. What harm could it do.” She walked to the door naked and opened it. The man yelled, “Wow! God is good! Now…..where do you want these blinds?”

I would have loved to see Rupert Murdoch and the other Fox News talking heads testify under oath, but I'm happy Dominion got a settlement. Expect to see Fox News lying before the ink on the check is dry. That's what they do.

There's talk of a possible gag order being imposed on Trump. I would hate to see him deprived of his right to talk himself into deeper trouble.

A man woke up one morning with a terrible toothache. His wife said, "You need to get to the dentist right away!" The man said, "No! I'm afraid of dentists." By the middle of the day, the pain was so bad that he went to the dentist anyway. When he got to the dentist, the dentist took X-rays and told the man, "That tooth is really bad. It's got to come out right now!" He picked up a syringe with Novocain and the man screamed, "No needles! I'm scared of needles!" The dentist said Ok and picked up a cannula to give the man nitrous oxide. The man screamed again and said, "No! if something is over my mouth or nose, I'll feel like I'm going to suffocate!" The dentist said, "Can you handle pills?" The man said, "Yes." The dentist left the room for a minute and came back with two pills. He gave the pills to the man and said, "Take this Viagra." The man took the pills and said, "Wow! I didn't know Viagra was also for pain." The dentist said, "It's not.....but it'll give you something to hang on to when I pull that tooth!

I wonder which federal lockup will be receiving additional funding for Secret Service accommodations?

Just a refresher: “Just say the election was corrupt and leave the rest to me and the Republican Congressmen.” - Donald Trump to the DOJ

At the end of the day, Donald Trump is just a private citizen and a former government employee who allegedly committed crimes. The facts will lock him up or set him free. All the people who are weeping and gnashing teeth over his indictment give me the mental image of the woman with a black eye and knocked out tooth who defends the man who just punched her in the face.

Republicans seem to be saying "WOKE" with such glee.....like they had been given permission to say the N-word without consequences.

A woman in a hot air balloon realized she was lost. She lowered her altitude and spotted a man in a boat below. She shouted to him, "Excuse me, can you help me? I promised a friend I would meet him an hour ago, but I don't know where I am." The man consulted his portable GPS and replied, "You're in a hot air balloon, approximately 30 feet above ground elevation of 2,346 feet above sea level. You are at 31 degrees, 14.97 minutes north latitude and 100 degrees, 49.09 minutes west longitude." She rolled her eyes and said, "You must be a Democrat." "I am," replied the man. "How did you know?" "Well," answered the balloonist, “everything you told me is technically correct. But I have no idea what to do with your information, and I'm still lost. Frankly, you've not been much help to me." The man smiled and responded, “You must be a Republican." "I am," replied the balloonist. "How did you know?" "Well," said the man, "you don't know where you are or where you are going. You've risen to where you are due to a large quantity of hot air. You made a promise you have no idea how to keep, and you expect me to solve your problem. You're in exactly the same position you were in before we met, but somehow now it's my fault.”

Some say "WOKE" is the new N-word.....especially in Florida.

Taking Ukraine is not the top of Putin's mountain. It's the bottom of the next one.

*biting my lip*

James Carville gave an appraisal of MTG's behavior on Ari Melber's program. I won't repeat it but I will say she fits the description.