phatcat

Perfect! Just freakin perfect! It’s been absolutely gorgeous here for weeks and I finally did the FJC course again and the weather totally turned to shit and I didn’t get to jump at all this weekend. The worst part of all, and I’m almost embarrassed to admit it, is that I felt RELIEVED about it. As someone who’s turned into a complete nutcase from not jumping in two years that’s not quite what I expected, but I was so nervous about it. I really want to jump, I NEED to, but my stupid brain seems to have other plans. Oh, well, I’m keeping an eye on the weather and hopefully this weekend will be better and I’ll get the nerve to drive to the DZ without making up an excuse to turn around – “No, next weekend would actually be better because blah, blah, blah.” It’s really simple. Step 1 – get my ass in the plane. Step 2 – get my ass out the door. If I can do that just once, I know I’ll be okay after that. Sorry to whine, but I’m really pissed at myself right now. Josh "Well I may be crazy, but YOU'RE boring!"

Thanks Michelle! Yes, it’s definitely time to play! As far as having patience, well, that’s not exactly something I’m good at. My “If I ain’t perfect, I ain’t shit” attitude has screwed me pretty bad before, so that’s something I’ve got to work on. This is supposed to be fun, damn it! I’ll probably screw up, but no big deal. After a beer or ten I’ll be fine and ready to try again (after sleeping off the beer, of course). Josh "Well I may be crazy, but YOU'RE boring!"

4 LONG days. By my calculations, which are probably wrong, it’s been 2 years, 4 weeks, and one day since my last jump, which was a totally crappy level 4 that I didn’t pass. And now this Saturday I’m doing the FJC again, and, weather permitting, I’ll FINALLY jump again. If the weather doesn’t permit it, I’ll most likely kill somebody. The weather is looking mostly good so far, but this is Minnesota so who the hell really knows? I’ve been waiting for this a long time and I’ve been bored out of my fucking mind for quite a while now because jumping again is all I can think about. I’m not even as nervous as I thought I would be. Not yet at least, I’m sure that will come. One thing I’m shooting for is to have my A by the end of October, I don’t know if that’s realistic or not. The reason is that Skydive Hutchinson is having a Balloon Boogie on Oct. 28-29. That would kick ass to jump out of a balloon. I failed my lev. 4 five times before becoming a pussy and giving up, and when I finally pass it this time, I swear I’ll buy a fucking keg, maybe two (one for me, one for everybody else!) I’m really looking forward to jumping my ass off, but god the wait is killing me! Anyway, wish me luck or something. Josh "Well I may be crazy, but YOU'RE boring!"

-A 'good' landing is one from which you can walk away. A 'great' landing is one after which they can use the plane again. -The three most useless things to a pilot are the altitude above you, runway behind you, and a tenth of a second ago. -You know you've landed with the wheels up if it takes full power to taxi to the ramp. Josh "Well I may be crazy, but YOU'RE boring!"

Oh, my God, Mr. Rogers is going away!!!!!!!!! This can’t be happening!!!!! I was so happy because I was going to jump again, (2 and a half freakin' weeks away goddamnit) and then this happens . What will happen to the neighborhood of make-believe? No, NOOO not the Trolley!!! What about Picture Picture? I just can’t live without it. Who will feed the fish? What if Mr. McFeely knocks and nobody answers? Oh, it’s sooooo sad . Just once more, for old time’s sake… It's a beautiful day in this neighborhood, A beautiful day for a neighbor. Would you be mine? Could you be mine?... It's a neighborly day in this beauty wood, A neighborly day for a beauty. Would you be mine? Could you be mine?... I've always wanted to have a neighbor just like you. I've always wanted to live in a neighborhood with you. So, let's make the most of this beautiful day. Since we're together we might as well say: Would you be mine? Could you be mine? Won't you be my neighbor? Won't you please, Won't you please? Please won't you be my neighbor? If you think I should just grow up then – FUCK YOU!! Josh "Well I may be crazy, but YOU'RE boring!"

Give us kitties some respect!!! Here is all we ask - CLEANLINESS: For some reasons, humans seem to enjoy immersing themselves in running water. Attempts to get humans to lick themselves clean have proven interesting, if unproductive. COMMUNICATION: Humans are unable to speak a proper language. Therefore, you should communicate a point loudly, repeatedly, and if at all possible, at about three in the morning. Any attempts at human-to-cat communication can be dealt with by simply ignoring it until it stops. FEEDING: Morning feeding should start promptly when your human is fast asleep, preferably three or four minutes before the alarm is supposed to go off. Recommended methods of waking your human include: sitting on its face, screaming in its ear, and biting its hair. MATING: Human mating behavior is fascinating. Unfortunately, humans tend to get easily spooked by prolonged study of courtship rituals, and resort to shoe-throwing behavior. TOILET TRAINING: A human's natural tendency is to not change your litter box. Although experts in human behavior believe it can be attributed to the "laziness reflex," this can be easily corrected through what is called "shoe therapy." Just remember that a human shoe looks a lot like a human toilet, and you should be fine. You got it? Please take this to heart. I REQUIRE a regular belly rubbing. Is that too much to ask? And good god, when I am sleeping, why the hell do you think you have to pick me up and talk about how cute I am? I’m trying to fucking sleep here you idiot! Why can’t you dumbass humans just leave me alone????? Josh "Well I may be crazy, but YOU'RE boring!"

LOL!, yeah, I know what you mean. I’ve been on here quite awhile and this site is as unique to the web as skydivers are to the general population. I could probably learn how to program my VCR on here if I asked. Come to think of it, how does that damn thing work? Josh "Well I may be crazy, but YOU'RE boring!"

Well this is one of the strangest things I’ve seen in awhile. I certainly don’t want to watch it, but I have to admire the fact that this guy must have balls of steel to actually do it. I don’t know, he can’t use ‘em so just get rid of ‘em and get new ones. Kind of makes sense, I guess. Then again, I’m probably as loony as he is. Josh "Well I may be crazy, but YOU'RE boring!"

Wow, I would kill to see just one of those with my own eyes. I hate you. Josh "Well I may be crazy, but YOU'RE boring!"

God I hope you’re right and I just have amnesia. Oh please, please, please. Josh "Well I may be crazy, but YOU'RE boring!"

Wow, after coming home and reading all the replies it sure is a relief that I’m not the only freakin nutcase here. J/K. In all seriousness, this has got to be one of the most interesting threads I’ve read here in a long time. Me too! -changing my tag to reflect my new found wisdom- Josh "Well I may be crazy, but YOU'RE boring!"

Michelle, are you a psychic? That’s exactly it. I saw that story on thrill seekers, and it seemed to make sense. But you are EXACTLY right. It’s really not just the thrill. I just need to get the hell out of this boring life that I live everyday. It’s seems very much like depression, the symptoms are probably the same, but it’s not that. People that are just depressed, in my opinion, are lost. They just don’t know where to go. Given that, I’m very fortunate, because I know where I need to go. It’s just a matter of DOING IT. And I will. Money was the first obstacle, and I’ve jumped over it. Fear is the next, and last, and I know I’ll jump over that because there was a time when I dreaded it. But now it’s just another thing. Yes, my stomach will do some funky things, and my brain will conjure up weird shit too, but eventually I’ll get in that door, and go out of it just as fast. My doubts are long gone, and now I just bear the excruciating wait till it finally happens. FJC is Sept 8. The weather has been so awesome here in MN it would be just my luck to screw me when it comes time to jump. Josh "One can never consent to creep when one feels an impulse to soar" - Helen Keller

I’m bored, so just for the sake of conversation, what’s the most unusual place you’ve landed out? In my 8 jumps I landed out once (not my fault, really), about a mile west of the DZ. It was on the edge of a cornfield. Upon getting up, (yes I skidded on my ass) I looked back and realized I landed right between two fence posts about 4 feet apart, if that. A little bit in either direction and I would have been a human scarecrow, and it wouldn’t have been pretty. So does anybody have any funny, strange experiences landing not quite on target? Josh "One can never consent to creep when one feels an impulse to soar" - Helen Keller

ADD?? People have told me that they think I have it. It’s true that there are things I can’t concentrate on. But it’s not that I can’t concentrate, I’m just thinking about something ELSE. Boring things just don’t hold my attention, but I don’t for one second consider it a problem. It’s the very reason I feel the desire to do “crazy” things like jumping out of airplanes. If some psychiatrist were to try and give me drugs to make that go away, I would make it VERY clear where he could shove those drugs. If I’m crazy, then I will spend the rest of my life making my craziness other people’s problem, not mine, because I wouldn’t trade it for the world. Josh "One can never consent to creep when one feels an impulse to soar" - Helen Keller

No, I missed the end, I only saw a few base jumps and the beginning of a tandem. Stupid phone rang, wrong number. New nick Kel? How come? Josh "One can never consent to creep when one feels an impulse to soar" - Helen Keller

One of my JM’s said it won’t open if it isn’t pretty, is that true? Personally, given my limited experience, any canopy that inflates correctly is the most beautiful thing that God ever created since the beginning of time as far as I’m concerned.

That's why i'm straight. Josh "One can never consent to creep when one feels an impulse to soar" - Helen Keller

Well, I don’t know what the deal is, but I just logged on a little while ago and my allergies just went into overdrive. I’ve been sneezing constantly and have to keep a roll of toilet paper by my computer since I ran out of Kleenex. I’m I allergic to DZ.com? That would be horrible! Say it isn’t so!! Josh "One can never consent to creep when one feels an impulse to soar" - Helen Keller

I just saw a short thing on TV about thrill seekers. It mostly had base jumpers on it but some skydiving too. From what I saw they were trying to explain what these people were like, and why they do what they do. I don’t know where it was cause I only caught a little bit, but did anybody else see it? It got me thinking, though. Why do we do it? I know that I get bored very quickly with things that most people do for fun. Ya know, like movies, bowling, golf (puke), stuff like that. Last time I went to a concert I think I looked at my watch about every five minutes just waiting (praying) for it to be over, despite the fact that it was one of my favorite bands. I just don’t like to sit there doing nothing. I guess what I’m asking isn’t so much why somebody has a desire to throw themselves out of a plane, but why most people don’t even bother to see what’s outside there own little safe bubble of existence. I can’t even count how many times I’ve heard “I could never do that” How can people just say that and be content with what could only be described as a normal, mundane, boring life? I’ll never get it. I’ve sacrificed so much over the last couple of years to finally have the opportunity to jump again only to be met with blank stares from people who obviously wonder what the hell is wrong with me. It seems so easy to just say “screw em” but I have a hard time with that. Is there any way to put into words how important this is? I know you can’t describe the feeling of freefall, I gave up on that a long time ago. Maybe it is futile, and I’ve got to let them go. I find it difficult to engage in “small talk” like “what do you think of this weather” and “how’s your day at work been”, simply because I don’t give a shit. Just let me sit here and stare at the sky and keep your boring conversations to yourself. I guess I’m just venting frustration, and it will all be okay when I get to the DZ next month to jump. But until then, whuffos SUCK! Leave me alone!! Don’t mind me, I’m just suffering from low altitude sickness, I expect to be cured in 3-4 weeks. Josh "One can never consent to creep when one feels an impulse to soar" - Helen Keller

FUCKIN FUCK YEAH!!!!!!! SEX PISTOLS RULE! Josh "One can never consent to creep when one feels an impulse to soar" - Helen Keller

COOL! I’ve been torn between the Zodiac and a Kitfox. Of course both are a long way off for me but I’ve been leaning toward the Kitfox because I picture myself fishing off the floats up on the billions of lakes on the MN, Canada border (ya gotta have the floats

I change my vote to agree with Wildblue. Of course that’s coming from somebody who printed the pic out, numbered the rows and columns with a pen and carefully observed every ass on the page. Like you didn’t do the same damn thing. Josh "One can never consent to creep when one feels an impulse to soar" - Helen Keller

HH, I have the same problem. I can roam DZ.com all I want but when I go to the control panel I get invalid password. I have IE 5.5, and i've been able to get into it until today, August 21, if that helps at all. I'm not trying to bitch though, I love your site! Just trying to help out as much as a computer illiterate whore can. Josh "One can never consent to creep when one feels an impulse to soar" - Helen Keller

Okay the FJC redo is coming up and I’ve been looking through my old logbook. To clarify, I did AFF 2 years ago and repeated lev. 4 five times before becoming frustrated and giving up. Now I’m doing it again from the beginning and from seeing my logbook I remember that I seem to have this automatic left turn. Of course I’ll tell my JM’s about it but I’d just like to throw this out there for some extra opinions. I know I definitely had a problem relaxing, so it’s probably just as simple as that. I’ve heard of heel clicks, but I don’t remember exactly what the purpose for them was. Is that relevant in my case? Maybe I’m getting a little ahead of myself but I’m just curious what anybody has to say. Josh "One can never consent to creep when one feels an impulse to soar" - Helen Keller

This is devil music! You and your prancing around and disrespecting people and stuff. I will have no part of it! Josh "One can never consent to creep when one feels an impulse to soar" - Helen Keller