outofit 0 #1 January 1, 2003 i have only done three tandems but each time i do one and my parents find out they totally freak. also, tonight i got a call from a DZO who i know personally and he was asking me when i was going to come down amd go through AFF. i'm just wondering how my parents will handle it. any suggestions? It is better to be dead and cool than alive and uncool! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
quade 3 #2 January 1, 2003 If you're old enough to do a tandem, then you're old enough to make your own decisions and stand by them. The real answer is to make up your own mind whether you're going to live your parent's life or your own.quade - The World's Most Boring Skydiver Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dzdiva 7 #3 January 1, 2003 It will take some time but they will adjust. My parents weren't quite sure why I wanted to do this.I'm 37 and they still worry. They are better now,mom even brags a little. I make sure after every jump I call my son and I call my mom. They're gonna worry no matter what you do. They're parents. They will adjust. Give it time! "It's not just a daydream if you choose to make it your life..." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PhreeZone 15 #4 January 1, 2003 >I make sure after every jump I call my son and I call my mom. During the summer there I'm sure my Mom would get mad at 10 calls a day Mine used to worry all the time till I bought her and my brother a tandem then that was about it on the worry complaints. Yesterday is history And tomorrow is a mystery Parachutemanuals.com Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dzdiva 7 #5 January 1, 2003 I'm sure once I start getting up in numbers I'll call once I'm done!LOL "It's not just a daydream if you choose to make it your life..." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
hookitt 0 #7 January 1, 2003 My folks understand completely. For one, they watched me grow up so They're kinda used to this sort of thing. My Mom has done 2 tandems. I got the extreme side of my personality from her I'm sure. They also have complete understanding of BASE jumping. I haven't hid any of this from them. If you can, Bring your Folks, or at least your Mom, out to the Dropzone. Let her see this social gathering. She'll get to watch people land, Watch video, Laugh. She can talk to some of the people out there and realize that were pretty decent people and that it's a nice controlled environment. (for the most part). If she gets to see what it really is, she'll still worry but she'll understand it so much better. They eventually come around but if you can show them what it's about then it's much quicker. One more thing. You MAY not want them there for your training. Since you'll be landing a parachute by yourself, it may not be the best thing to have them around. Good luck My grammar sometimes resembles that of magnetic refrigerator poetry... Ghetto Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Dumpster 0 #8 January 1, 2003 My whole family is cool with my skydiving, except for my wife, and even though she worked at the DZ for a shoert time, she still doesn't get it. Getting her to do a tandem is out of the question. She hates being what she calls a "skydiving widow". ( She was a golf widow and a football widow in previuos relationships.) And I have no intention of giving up jumping. I can only hope one day she starts to reealize what it really means to us, as skydivers. Hopefully your parents will realize how much you love jumping, and will be happy to see you so happy. Easy Does It Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
outofit 0 #9 January 1, 2003 thanks guys! this really helps! It is better to be dead and cool than alive and uncool! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
DJL 232 #10 January 1, 2003 An observation. I have a bunch of friends who know I jump but always say "too dangerous". That's because all that people here is what comes on entertainment news. I brought our DZ christmas video over to a friend's house and left it for a day or two. Now that they've seen the safe repetition of dives they all are planning to make a jump. Unfortunately I left the video at home when I went home for the holidays so I can't say what the family thought. PEACE, Doug"I encourage all awesome dangerous behavior." - Jeffro Fincher Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Gawain 0 #11 January 1, 2003 My mom and sister don't get it. My dad and his wife think skydiving is amazing. The rest are whuffos... So I try and I scream and I beg and I sigh Just to prove I'm alive, and it's alright 'Cause tonight there's a way I'll make light of my treacherous life Make light! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
falxori 0 #12 January 1, 2003 hmmm, so its only my family that have made a list of things i own and decided who gets what in case i crash ? and no, i'm not kidding... O "Carpe diem, quam minimum credula postero." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cepheus 0 #13 January 1, 2003 Understand? No. Probably never. In fact, bank on the near-fact that they will never understand what you do. Why? The only way to understand is to do it. So if your parents are anything like my mom, they will never understand. Accept? That's a different story. My mom would literally turn around, walk away, and say 'I don't want to hear about it,' whenever I brought up skydiving. This was before I made my first jump. Imagine the frost coming off the phone when I called to let her know that Yes, I did indeed survive. Arctic temperatures continued when I told her that Yes, I will be doing this again. I'm very proud of her though. Eventually she grew to accept that the sky and I are now inseperable. She's been to the dropzone with me twice now, and has even ridden to altitude with me. She likes everyone at the DZ, and likes to brag about my skydiving to co-workers, relatives, complete strangers. Who knows -- she may do a tandem one day. Maybe. Doubtful, but maybe. The point is, if I had done any more than simply accept her initial reaction, and instead acted on it, I wouldn't have found my place in the sky. I would have stayed, grounded, always wondering what I might be missing. There is only one person on this Earth that you need to live for (aside from your children should you be lucky enough to have them). That person is you. If your parents can't understand it, that's fine. If they can't accept it, that's fine too. You are your own person, able to decide your own fate. Persist. Jump as often as you can. Accept their intolerance, but never give in to it.-- Skydive -- testing gravity, one jump at a time. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Mad47 0 #14 January 1, 2003 It is easy for me. My folks are in Russia and I’m in US. My mom simply doesn’t know about it. An idea about calling from Dallas to St-Petersburg after every jump during the summer to calm my mom down freaks me outMost of the whuffo friends think I’m completely crazy. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tb62871 0 #15 January 1, 2003 understand ? probrabbly not. would they try a tandem? never. but they would like to have their ashes scattered in the clouds in a 3-way with my brothers when their time comes --TB Welcome my friends to the show that never ends. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
neiliss 0 #16 January 1, 2003 My mom has kind of accepted it now. Took her a while but I took her down to the DZ and jumped while I was still a student. I think that she was really proud to see me land (safely As for my wife and kid, I bought my wife a tandem a few weeks ago. She loved it but still doesn't get my obsession. My kid (nearly seven) on the other hand thinks that I am the coolest dad in the world. He spends all of his time talking about skydiving, talking to the skydivers on the DZ. He has been adopted by the DZ and spends nearly every weekend there with me. He takes photos and video of my jumps and of other peoples jumps and generally has a wonderful time running around the DZ. So for me I guess 2 out of 4 people isn't bad. Cheers Neil Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dropdeded 0 #17 January 1, 2003 No,I dont think its possible for them to understand. Most of my family thinks its great that I found something I love doing(when I can).My brother is a complete whuffo.One sister,a niece and a nephew did a Tandem but thats it.It just didnt grab them like it has me. dropdeded------------------------------------------ The Dude Abides. - Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Iezyka 0 #18 January 1, 2003 My parents were really worried and even had nightmares about skydiving. And all their friends thought they were crazy to let me skydive, which made them even more upset. I brought them to the dropzone and they could see how much fun we had and they could ask the instructors about the course. If I want to make them feel better, I have to figure out what they are worried about. Maybe accidents, safety, almost only men at the dz, drugs. When they ask something about how my jump was, I also try to answer these questions they don´t want to ask all the time. I do it by answering their actual question and at the same time remember to tell some details I think they would like to know. If they ask how my jump was, I could tell them about the four-way girl team left the airplane first, and then it was our turn, or that we have to separate after the jump so we don´t crash when we open the parachutes. If they ask something about my gear I answer, and I add something how carefully the reserve has to be packed, or that I just got my aad back from service and show them how it works. If there was an accident I call them and tell them I´m allright, and tell them why it happened and what I do to decrease the risk for it to happen to me, and what I would do if it would happen to me anyway. And so on.. They are not all that worried anymore, they do not only know the answers to the common whuffo-questions, but they know enough to defend my choice of sport to their friends. It´s like therapy for them! I would never try to make them to tandem, that could give them wrong signals about the what I think the reason to skydive is. I want them to know I´m only jumping because I want to do it, not because somebody else told me or because it´s 'cool'. They know I would help them in 3 minutes to find the best place to skydive, the best time of the year, with a good photographer, if they would ever get the idea to jump... but I leave that decision for them to make. They know they can´t do anything to make me stop. But if there is some way I could do to make them feel better about skydiving and make them more interested and support me, I´m glad to try! Good luck! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skygirlpc 0 #19 January 1, 2003 Quote If you can, Bring your Folks, or at least your Mom, out to the Dropzone. Let her see this social gathering. She'll get to watch people land, Watch video, Laugh. She can talk to some of the people out there and realize that were pretty decent people and that it's a nice controlled environment. (for the most part). I really agree with hookit! If you can, try to get your mom out to the dz. I really think that having my mom at the dz so much has been the key in her supporting me so much! At first she supported my decision to jump because she didn't want me to have any regrets but since then, when she's out at the dz and sees how safe and all the relationships and everything....I think she likes hanging out at the dz almost as much as I do!Danielle Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jumperconway 0 #20 January 3, 2003 My mom's good wiyh it and comes out occasionally. The first time she came out, we were dirt diving a 6way. I told her to go watch the people coming down from the previous load , so at least she wouldn't have a heart attack just watching me load the plane with all the scared antisapation. So when we went up she new what to expect. She brought my sister and a family friend and I stood up about 50 feet from them so they thought it was cool. My dad on the other hand would constantly tell me that I had proved that I could do it and survive after #100,200,300,400 he started slowing the comments a little. He finally came out to watch the second day of the Texas State Record attempts. Nice, he sees 3 Otters and 2 Casas worth of people laying in formation in the landing area going "Holy Shit!" That particular load the 120 way was blocked from ground view until we were tracking away. The only landing he has ever seen me do I didn't stand up! He hasn't been back, but has been heard semi-bragging after my 12hr freefall badge, and talking about me having around 500 jumps a few months back, only to have my mother correct him that it was around 1000! Now he has 3 RW photos in his office, an 8way, my first 42way and one of the TSR 113way. Now when come to work Monday mornings he just asks if I got a lot of jumps in over the weekend! My mom just asks if we were able to jump when the winds were real bad. Other than that, she has confidence in my judgement ( although if they'll put the Otter in the air,I'll be on it). She is even willing to buy jump related gear (like a new Oxygen A3) for Christmas! If they can see videos of what you do in freefall, they may be a little more open minded. Understand that we just don't jump out of planes to play Russian roulette ever time helps a lot! Good luck and B/S, Conway 1117 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
FallinWoman 1 #21 January 5, 2003 Understand? NO!! My father was proud after my first jump....for me having the "balls" to do it. He still doesn't understand why I feel the need to do it again and again..... My mom...I thought that she understood. She has learned a lot just by listening and asking questions. Someday I think she will make a tandem. Once I explained the whole reserve chute and AAD idea to her and told her how anal I am about safety, she chilled out a bit. Until the other night. We were talking about the possibility of me having kids one day (don't ask how THAT came up....) It truly never occured to her that I would continue jumping even after having children. Or that it would be ok with me if the father of my children continued jumping. My issue would be the time he might want to spend away from me and the kids, not the fact the he was jumping!!! I could literally see her head spinning!!! ~Anne I'm a Doll!!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
eyeinthesky 0 #22 January 6, 2003 my parents are kinda uneasy with me going out there and doing it, but they have always supported me in everything i have done. i tell them i went jumping over the weekend, they nervously smile and shake their heads, which amuses me further. i once wrote a paper, just for personal reasons, explaining why i chose to do some of the things i do and what in my past makes me the person i am now and make the decisions i do now. they totally understand my personality now, i think, but they still would rather i kept my butt on the ground....theyre parents, theyre supposed to worry, animal survival instincts for the family and all....try to tell them why you do it though, otherwise people tend to think we are bordering on suicide or have a death wish or something..... doug never let anyone in your will pack your chute!hey, i was stupid before stupid was cool! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
