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pyke

The Femur Diaries ~~(or...

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What it is like to break the "hardest to break bone in the body" while skydiving!)
Sunday - I hadn't planned on skydiving today, but as it is our dz Xmas party next weekend, I think I will go see if someone wants to "go in on some floor space" for the room I have reserved. And...while I am there...why not!! 2 jumps only, as I have a report to do for my boss by tomorrow morning, and he is a hard ass for work - so I better give myself the most amount of the day to work on it. Get up early - go to the dz - do a 4 way and only get one point. Oh well, it felt good to be in the air. Jump #2 - a 3 way FF with Dirk and Tom (a new guy from another local dz). K, a lawn dart into a sit - I think I can handle that. Leave the plane - blow the lawn dart - HOLY SHIT - I can sit fly!!!B|. Ooops, this doesn't look like what I normally open over - oh, the dz is over there. Well, I ain't going to make that - so I had better suss out someplace else to land. Looking...looking....looking....looking.....left...right....behind...in front.....left - right - infront - behind.....DAMN - is that place the only "good" place to land?? Ok, I think I can handle this - I have to do a tricky turn to get in on final, but I think I can handle this.
Line it up, and that last turn should be done.......now...okay and start to flare and here comes the ground....and impact (SNAP!) [what the FUCK was that?? my ribs?? my leg?? a stick I landed on??? stop rolling and find out what it was.......HOLY SHIT - It's my FEMUR!!!!!! AAAAAAAAAAHHHHHHHHHGGGGGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHHH
(presence of mind - get out of rig - DON'T let them cut it off!! Get help from locals who have come to help - they get rig off - GREAT!!!) Okay, where does it hurt...just the leg - and a little on my sides - possibly broken ribs - nothing too serious....K, FUCK!!!!...MY FEMUR!!!!!!
Ambulance ride to the hospital - consult with doctor as to what happened/going to happen - get Xrays - get surgical consult - talk with friend from dz who came in to sit with me - entertain her with glove "chickens" - okay, well, it is time to go to surgery - so I hope like hell someone gets in touch with my sister (who was out). And, away we go......
Kahurangi e Mahearangi,
Pyke :P
The Kiwi Lesbian!!!
USPA C- 31879

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Sunday night - come out of surgery heavily drugged - notice that my sister and her girlfriend are at the end of my bed - say a few words - pass out!!!
Monday - wake up to pain in leg...oh yeah - I BROKE MY FEMUR!!!! Fuck me - that WASN'T a dream!! K, well, this hurts like hell - and I can hardly put any weight on my right thigh....it hurts just sitting here in bed. Oh well, not much I can do! Nurses come in - bring breakfast...."mmmmm, I'm hungry - what is for breakfast??" "damn, I am vegetarian - and they serve me meat for breakfast - better tell someone this." What's on the telly? Hours pass.....hours pass....get a few phone calls from Mum, Dad, Sister, other skydivers!. Rigger comes in to see what's up - shoot the shit - and let me know that nothing happened to my rig and it is packed and waiting for me. They (nurses) try to take me for a walk and I almost pass out from just standing up. I walk around in a circle on crutches and DAMN!!! This shite hurts!!!
I am bored - when do I leave?? Well, doc says as soon as I can walk around comfortably and my "activities" return to normal - I am free to go. Okay, well, I can pee on demand now, and I haven't tried walking, but I can sit up better now - when can I go?? Mmmmm, think I'll nap. Wake up to find out that it is like 9 o'clock and they can't release me because P.T. didn't want to wake me to walk me - so I have another night in the hospital....great!!! What's on tele??
Tuesday - K, I can leave today - as soon as P.T. comes for a visit. That is great....get them in here...I can walk!! I was up last night - I brushed my teeth - went into the toilet by myself - I am good to go - get me outta here!! Sis can either pick me up this morning, or late in the eve - as she has work committments....k, get me outta here. Can't do it.
Fine, I will chill out here!! I get up, take a small walk, sponge off - put on a clean shirt - clean undies - brush teeth, get back in bed - Damn - this leg hurts!! What's on tele??
Why do all the young nurses keep coming in to give me more ice?? Oh well, whatever, I am laid up - not like I am "irresistable" right now...I am a bloody gimp!! Aahh..what was I thinking....why that out?? why that entry?? Did I flare enough?? Could I have chosen another out?? Why did I have to BREAK it?? Why not just a sprain - or a bloody torn ligament?? Aaaaarrrrrggggghhhhhh!!!
Okay, it is almost 5 - Sister should be here soon - so get all the nurses to check me out. K, got all my stuff ready - let's go.......
.....8:30pm Sister walks in....GREAT!!!! Man, what a welcome relief that is!! Let's get out of here!!!
Ahhh....HOME!!! What a sweetie - she has arranged the couch and all the furniture to accomodate me. Well, this is where I will be for a while...so lets get comfortable!
Check in to the office - check emails - tell boss what is wrong with me and that I can't make the meeting this week! K, time to lay down...need to rest the leg!
Time for bed....no hospital bed to deal with! Ahh, my own pillows...ow, ow, OW...can't get comfortable there....ow, ow, OW....can't get comfortable there....Ah, screw it....I sleeping on the couch where I was comfortable!!
Kahurangi e Mahearangi,
Pyke :P
The Kiwi Lesbian!!!
USPA C- 31879

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Pyke, Sounds like you are better. How did your bedside nursing adventures go?
Tuff break, so to speak, missing the Christmas Party and seeing you and the rest of the Georgia Gang, :( but then again there are other years. And besides, Cyber hasnt made one yet and neither have I so, its a streak.
Be sure to write and let us know how you really are. B|
http://www.AirAnn.com
Sports don't build character.... they reveal it. -unknown

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Wednesday - Man, that was an awesome sleep!! Turn on the tele - get up and get some breakfast.....Mmmmm, Honeycomb!! This is great!! Damn hospital food - and all that gas it gave me!! Finally, I can eat something other than mash and spinach! Check in with the office - and nobody needs me - good! I'm taking a nap!
Only been up about 2 hours and I think I will rest some more! Damn, why this....why now....why me!!! What the fuck is wrong with me?? How this is going to fuck with my holiday plans.....my work plans....EVERYTHING!!!! Why did I have to break my FEMUR??? It's not like it is a small bone...it is the single LARGEST bone in the body....it is practically unbreakable and yet, SNAP, like a dried twig - it broke!! What is this going to do for my future? My legs are a different length now, I am going to limp for the rest of my life! I hope this second doctor performs the second surgery to fix the discrepency in length...I don't want to limp just because I chose to skydive!! Speaking of skydiving.......
What the fuck was I thinking?? I mean, Yeah, it is cool to skydive - hell - it is like nothing else, but if it cost me a femur - is it worth it?? I have to take a week off work ( a job I just got), I lose all that revenue in my bank...I can't pay bills...FUCK!, BILLS, how much did all this cost me?? An orthopaedic surgeon, an anaethesiologist, surgical staff , 2 nights in hospital.....HOW MUCH??? Lets do the math - I have a little over 2 hours of freefall - that cost me roughly 2500 for jumps, and all the gear was another investment of 2500....so, for 5 GRAND I get 2 hours worth of fun - and in one moment I just went into debt for probably 12+ GRAND in surgery and bills, and I have 3-4 months away from the sport.....is that worth it??? Stop thinking like that - think about all the fun you had......
Yeah, some fun it is to sit here with a fucking broken femur while everyone else has their 'natural' femurs and probably always will...I have a fucking rod in mine!!! Arrrrrrrgggggghhh!! WHY!!??
Kahurangi e Mahearangi,
Pyke :P
The Kiwi Lesbian!!!
USPA C- 31879

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Thursday -
Man, I didn't need that phone call from my "ex" partner in New Zealand. She rang up after having a few and she let me know what she "really" thought! On top of that, I get a ring from Sister who brings up all the inconveniences this is going to bring up to all sorts of people. People who didn't choose to be inconvenience by my "sport". Then, my Mum rings and asks how things are....well, that's all it took....here they come.....TEARS!!! Man, all this shit sucks - why me!?? why now?? why my femur?? I am so confused with what is going on...what is going to happen....how I am supposed to continue working...how am I supposed to clock myself for the last week? Man, WHY ME???
Fuck it - I am going to sleep and watch telly!!
Today SUCKS!!!
Kahurangi e Mahearangi,
Pyke :P
The Kiwi Lesbian!!!
USPA C- 31879

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Friday - Well, yesterday sucked, but it helped getting a phone call from an apologetic "ex" partner who apologised for saying all she said, and that she was just scared due to not hearing from me for so long, but she is glad I am okay, and looking forward to seeing me for the holidays.
Let's see - it is almost a week since I broke my leg - and I can actually move on it pretty good. I am able to "barely" move on one crutch, but I can get around on 2 really well! That is cool....what else can I do? NOTHING:(....everything else hurts like a bitch!!
Well, it is almost the weekend....let's see - I had so many things I needed to do this week to get ready for, first the DZ Xmas party, then my partner's holiday visit. Ahhh, I can't do any of it!! Fuck it....maybe I can do some of it next week! Tomorrow is the DZ Xmas party - and hopefully I can go, but I don't want to be a burden to anyone there - so I should probably stay home and not worry about it. Besides, a couple of people have offered to help drive me to and from, but that is a huge inconvenience and I wouldn't want to do that to them. Oh well, I'll get some videos and watch movies tomorrow night.
Man, time creeps when you have NOTHING to do...think I will play some online games and take a nap later.
Wow, is it that time?? I guess I had better go to bed....
Kahurangi e Mahearangi,
Pyke :P
The Kiwi Lesbian!!!
USPA C- 31879

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Saturday - Well, today is supposed to be a day filled with excitement as I build up towards a huge party with all the dz buddies I have - instead I am stuck on this damn couch - nursing my fucking leg!
Oh well - and it is a great day too! Man, what a gorgeous sun - think I will go outside and enjoy it some....hmm....wonder if a beer would fuck me up or not - shall have to find out. Wow, it is hot out hereB|....this beer tastes nice though!:)Let's see - I know it is going to take me a while to get ready, so I should start early...what time is it? Quarter to 7, cool, that should do it. Let's see, first things first...sponge bath....man, that feels good! K, now clean undies and shirt and what pants - how about these....cool. 20 minutes just to get the pants on...huffing and puffing all the way. K, got that done - now, shave. Man, standing on one leg for a long time SUCKS!!! Might sit down - 10 minutes later - gotta iron the shirt....get the iron ready. K, while that is heating up, get shoes and socks sorted....man, this is tiring! Might rest a while. K, back at it. Iron the shirt, put it on, get it tucked in, and the belt....Damn, that is in the other room! K, gotta get it, so let's go. Fuck, this is hard work - I am sweating like damn pig! Gonna need another sponge bath after this!! Okay, got dressed up to my shoes - get those on and we're all good! Arrrrhh.....Errrrrrhh.....Errrrrrh.....got the sock on....and its on the foot that isn't broken!!! Put shoe on, and get it tied.....Errrrrrhh....done! K, sister will have to do the other one, but we're good to go....
Time check: 7:30....wow, that didn't take that long!!! Ha!!
Once at the party it is a challenge to get comfortable in something other than a couch.....I try to stomach a bloody mary, but it is made by a "novice" and is a little stiff - not what I "needed" right now, but fuck it - I have had a bad week - and I deserve it! My bed is going to feel great tonight!!
Kahurangi e Mahearangi,
Pyke :P
The Kiwi Lesbian!!!
USPA C- 31879

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Dude, know exactly how you feel,
I still have a titanium rod in my femur from something similar 5 years ago (bust my femur in two places).
Ya gotta stop this "why?" shit, it happened, and your only gonna exacerbate the downer effect of the pain killers if you let these thoughts eat away at you. You can't afford this sort of thing to distract from your mission to get back. You (and I) screwed up, so just accept it, deal with it, dust yourself off and get on with it.
Biggest advice I can give you is to do the physio....Otherwise it'll be a long road back to jumping. The saw bones that fixed me up said I'd never jump again, said I'd be lucky if I could even walk straight etc...Stoopid quack, didn't realise the strength of my resolve (or the strength of my friends' support and encouragement), 2 years on sticks, 4 ops, and 2 1/2 years later I was back on jump run, and things have just got better and better since then.
Chin up bro, it could have been worse, they cut my rig off me as I lay gibbering in the field. Hell they even cut off my jump suit, my teva, my prized rugby shirt, my trousers, even my boxer shorts. Don't get hung up on the money spent either, of course its worth it man.
A case of beer says we've not seen or heard the last of Pyke....
D

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"I didn't need that phone call from my "ex" partner in New Zealand"
"She calls me on the phone....Just when I was low. Feelin short of stable..All that she intends....and all she keeps inside......isn't on the label. She says she's ashamed...can she take me for awhile.......I'm somewhere between...never really know....a killer from a savior....and I break at the bend...here and now will she ever be again.......I have found.....all that shimmers in this world is sure to fade....away ....again.......It's too far away for me to hold. Too far away...." -Fuel
Sorry.....just seemed to fit the situation....:)"Carb Heat On....Carb Heat On.....Carb Heat On..."-Phil Polstra :)Clay

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Sunday - wake up to a phone call inviting me down the street to a "hood" breakfast. That's cool - I get to get out of the house again!! Sure - get my shoes on and away we go!!! Good to know that is it is 'formal' dress...as these new pajamas will work perfectly!!!!
Hard to get comfortable here too - damn - this shit is getting old!! I just wish I could sit comfortably - after all - the leg itself doesn't hurt now as much as the joints at the top and knee. And, all the scratches from landing in a friggen briar patch have healed up and are all scabbed (no wonder I couldn't get comfortable in the hospital bed!), so they aren't a worry anymore.
Well, I am done eating, and I can't get comfortable - so I am outta here! "Thanks for Breakfast....bye!"
Not home for more than 10 minutes when my Sister asks if I want to go shopping with her today - SURE!!! Beats sitting around here watching oxygen convert to carbon dioxide!! Here, there, all sorts of places and shops....tiring, but doable. My leg starts to swell towards the end of the day, so Sis decides it is best to take me home and after 5 hours of shopping - I am back on my own couch with a starting to get sore leg up on pillows. Think I will watch some videos tonight.....
Mmmmm...haven't seen "Snatch" in a while now - might see that one!
Good movie!!! Wow, is it really 12:30 - feels so much later!! Oh well, time for bed.
Might see what positions I can get in.....
I can do the back thing - been doing that for a week. Errrrrh....Aaaaahhhhh.......Errrrrrhhh.......AAAAAAAGGGGGGHHHH can't do that one......Errrrh....errrrrrh....okay, can do the stomach.......AHHHHHAA...not for long though....bloody hip....now it's killing me! Screw this...I'm taking drugs! Try to get comfortable, but this damn hip is killing me now....kick in...kick in...hurry up drugs....kick in....aaaaaaaahahhhhhh...that's it....yeahhhhhh......ZZZZZZZZZ
Kahurangi e Mahearangi,
Pyke :P
The Kiwi Lesbian!!!
USPA C- 31879

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Wow... you're bringing back some horrible memories for me pyke... like the whole months of January and February '01...
A positive attitude (well, that, 420, Vicodin and alcohol) is what's going to get you through this. You will be working again soon, you will walk normally again soon, you will be jumping again soon. Repeat this to yourself over and over. I know, it's kinda hard when every small move you make creates intense pain, but it does work - I'm proof. :)pm or email me if you want to chat with someone who's been there (the flat on the back unable to move in extreme pain part anyway...)
pull and flare,
lisa

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Monday - Wow, was that just what the doctor ordered or what!!! I had such a good weekend in the end....got out of the house - did some shopping...saw some friends....and now, today, Monday, is when I see the second Orthopead to check on the leg. Can't wait....got all sorts of questions, all sorts of new energy.
K, think I will check in with work....no fires...great. Means, I don't need to do anything. Think I will check out some online games and then get ready.
Nearly one o'clock....better start getting ready...Sis is coming soon. K, sponge bath, wash hair, brush teeth, get dressed - WOW, that was fast....20 past...I'm getting better at this!
Sis is running late, but no worries, I gotta ring the doc to check in anyway. K, here she is - and we're off!
"What do you mean he has cancelled his afternoon appts? I just bloody rang in"....."Sorry sir, he is stuck in surgery and can't leave his patient" "Fine, when can I come back?" "Tomorrow at 9:30am - fine, that will have to do. Can I fill out any paper work to save me time tomorrow?" "Sure - here you go...just fill these two out and sign the back of this one".
"K, here you go..." "Oh, it now appears he is going to be here - he just rang in - so would you like to wait....?" "Sure - that'll be great!" (reading a magazine article while waiting I see an ad for a Nissan Xterra that says: "The New Xterra...That which doesn't kill us - only makes us stronger....Critically wounds us, but doesn't kill us" I don't realise at the time how positive this is to me, but I notice it)
Well, time to see the doc...."Doc - wanted to know about this....and this.....and what about the strength of the leg in the future?....and what about "normal" activity later?....and what about this...and this...??????????" GREAT!!!!!
K, Sis has to run a few errands and then we are done for the day. "Wanna drink??" "Sure, and lets get some tea while we're at it - Great, I am starving!!!!"........
Oooops, too much beer!!! Feeling a little 'under', but nevermind - have felt worse lately!
(phone rings)"Hi Mum, yeah, saw the doc today and he said......."
Kahurangi e Mahearangi,
Pyke :P
The Kiwi Lesbian!!!
USPA C- 31879

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"pm or email me if you want to chat with someone who's been there (the flat on the back unable to move in extreme pain part anyway...)"
Goes for me too man, especially if things get you down around christmas....or even if you just wanna chat....
I'll tell you the story of the 36 hour flight from Aberdeen to Tauranga for my bro's wedding 2 weeks after I got out of the ortho unit, wayfarin' on warfarin.
D

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Tuesday -
Well, after 9 days of having a broken right leg, breaking the "hardest to break bone in the body"....the sky is blue once again!!!!! It almost seems like it was fate....the day after I broke my leg - it rained for 3 straight days...then, it was sort of nice, then really nice, then rainy, and now nice again!!
After seeing the second doctor, all of my fears and worries are put into perspective and/or alleviated.
Bascially, this is what I can offer anyone out there who hasn't gone through this (yet!), but has the fear that one day it "MIGHT" happen.......
SHIT DOES HAPPEN!!!! Nothing I could have done a week ago Sunday seems to have been avoidable (except going to the dz, of course, but how realistic is that?). I made an uneventful skydive, nothing out of the ordinary happened during the break off, or the deployment....I was just going to have to land out. NOW, should I have chosen another out - probably, but I chose one that made the most sense at the time, and it was too late to decide on something else SAFELY...so I made my approach and well, it didn't work for me. It could have even happened on a HUGE, SAFE out, but it didn't and perhaps that makes it easier to take.
I broke my femur...and it is perhaps the worse bone in the body to break (except for perhaps the hip or back) as it makes you evaluate all sorts of things you didn't think you would ever want to evaluate. It asks you to evaluate why you do things you do, why you make choices you make, and who that affects.
For me...after 9 solid days of thinking about, worrying about, being incredibly confused about it, breaking up over it....I can honestly say....I WILL BE BACK IN THE SKY!!!!
I am ALWAYS going to inconvenience people - regardless of what, or where I ever am. I am always going to be a worry to my parents, family, friends, but if they all know that I am happy - as I am doing what I love and that makes me happy, then that should provide comfort to them. And it is healthy to worry some about those you care about!
My job will sort itself out, my boss will get over the fact I couldn't make the meeting - someone will fill me in later. I will be back at work and I will be able to work long enough to build up more paid time off and I will be able to pay off the paid time off I "borrowed" as well. I will even have all of this done, by the time I get back to jumping - so what have I lost??? Not alot....I owe the kind people who spent their Sunday night and gave of their expertise to put me back together....and I would probably owe something similar if I were in a car accident next month - so what is a skydiving accident?? Nothing...just an inconvenience!!!
So, if you skydive - there is a possibility of injury or even death.....but then again.....that is inherent in just about EVERYTHING we do....so would I ever want to give this up??
Nahh....probably not!!!B|
So, I am going to hobble off to the fridge to get a drink, but I will leave you with this........
JUST DON'T WORRY ABOUT IT - THIS TOO SHALL PASS!!!!
:)(can't tell my spirits picked up at all....can you??:D!!!)
Kahurangi e Mahearangi,
Pyke :P
The Kiwi Lesbian!!!
USPA C- 31879

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Pykie, you mind is working overtime, babe.
I worked in Ortho -in several previous lives- and had my own private crash broke stuff. The only way your Ortho Dude can answer these questions is -with time. And most of it depends on YOU.
You must do what the guy says. -and no Hero stuff. Like, I am going to walk ahead of schedule or I am jumping in a cast (like some people) its just lunatic fringe talking. Just SAY NO.... That is Satan, man! . Just sit on your arse and well, ...sit there. Take all the drugs you can and pass the hell out. You dont often get the written permission from your doctor to do so. So, live it up.
Your Ortho will look at your xrays and majically determine how fast the bones are taking to deal with the regrouping activity. After about 2 or 3 visits, even you can see whats up with the bone regrowth. Keep informed. Be sure to look at the xrays with him and compare the images one, two and three. You will be able to know when you can do an activity and when you cant. You can judge how best to plan your affairs by what you know to be true. Example: I have x amount of bone growth here, if I go dancing around on the leg; #1 its going to hurt, and #2 your break position may change. If you change your position of your bone growth you are setting yourself up for a bad time later. (Levin and I both are going to be walking with right leg limps for a while.)
In your biography, this will be a chapter under the heading of several different kinds of serious pains - in the arse and/or leg.
http://www.AirAnn.com
Sports don't build character.... they reveal it. -unknown

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Our poor little Pykie!! Hang in there...it can only get better from here. :)I had a friend not pull out of a hook turn on a 2.8:1 loaded Icarus this summer and break his femur in 2 places and they had to reconstruct his arteries in his arm with some from his feet. This was back in early August. He has been back to work full-time since the end of September (not as a roofer anymore, but trucking) so it didn't take too long. He was also working all September at the dz debriefing students on their first jump in the video room.
We did a fundraiser in early September for him and his family at the dz....(hint...hint...if anyone jumps at Pyke's dz) which helped out alot (over $1000). We had a day of fun jump competitions and then had a pig roast after for $25 a ticket plus any other donations etc.
just a thought!
Stay positive Pyke, it won't be long until you are back in the saddle! :)Tee

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Quote

For me...after 9 solid days of thinking about, worrying about, being incredibly confused about it, breaking up over it....I can honestly say....I WILL BE BACK IN THE SKY!!!!

Pyke, I cannot sum up how much YOU ROCK!
Great story. 20 minutes to get a pant leg on... finding a comfy position... how that resonates in ever so recent memory!
My fateful encounter with mother earth was just a couple of months ago, during which a chunk of tibia decided to take a leisurely stroll further down into my foot. Not as bad as a mangled femur, I s'pose, but it did me in quite nicely just the same.
When I got to see the orthoguru a couple days later, I asked him if we could try setting/reducing it without surgery (lest he be forced to cut me unanaesthetized), and he begrudgingly gave it a shot. And, to his surprise, it worked! Subsequent pictures showed near-perfect position, and I got to learn la maze techniques (hee-hee-hoooooo) in the process!
So there I was, growing roots into the couch (quickly becoming my closest friend), whimpering every now and again (OK, more like all the time), missing tons of work (needed a break), having family take care of me (helpless?), soooo wishing I hadn't been so stubborn about getting a manual-shift (yeppers, left ankle), finally deciding to leave the job outright to launch a startup (some good *does* come from these things), and actually starting to enjoy tv shows (*ick*). And what was most on my mind?
GETTING BACK INTO THE AIR, BABY! YEEEEAH!!!
http://www.skydivingmovies.com/ kept me going, too. I've prolly seen those clips as many times over as I've seen M*A*S*H reruns in the last few weeks! :)It's so AWESOME to see you've got the great perspective on the whole thing, and I hope you're cleared for altitude soon! Til then, use the time to visualize. I got in about 34 hours of freefly time in the past couple months, and I can't wait to try out some of the new moves I learned! ;)
So I decided to get a few jumps in that day. I whipped out my wallet, pulled out the next few months of my life, smacked 'em on the table and said, "Got any room on the next load?"
I had such a great time, I can't wait to do it again!
Steve

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