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Nick

Life's Unanswered questions

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Why can't women put on mascara with their mouth closed?

Is it possible to brush your teeth without wiggling
your ass?

Why is it called Alcoholics Anonymous when the first thing you do is stand up and say, 'My name is John, and I am an alcoholic'?

Why are they called stairs inside but steps outside?

Why is there a light in the fridge and not in the freezer?

Why does mineral water that 'has trickled through mountains for centuries' have a 'use by' date?

Why do toasters always have a setting that burns the toast to a horrible crisp no one would eat?

Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, 'I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink whatever comes out'?

Why does goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

If a man is talking in the forest, and no woman is there to hear him, is he still wrong?

Why is it that when someone tells you that there are over a billion stars in the universe, you believe them, but if they tell you there is wet paint somewhere, you have to touch it to make sure?

Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your ass?

Did you ever notice that when you blow in a dog's face, he gets mad at you but when you take him on a car ride, he sticks his head out the window?

Nick
Gravity- It's not just a good idea, it's the LAW!

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Why do they call it an asteroid when it's outside the hemisphere, but call it a hemorrhoid when it's in your ass?



ARRRGGHHH!!! There are too many things like this going on that can unbalance the whole universe and start something we can never ever stop. Like the End! Where do I make my stance against all this?

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Who was the first person to look at a cow and say, 'I think I'll squeeze these dangly things here and drink whatever comes out'?



Who was the first person to break open an oyster and say, "I think I'll eat that."?

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Why does goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!



Why does Goofy wear pants and Pluto doesn't?
Shit happens. And it usually happens because of physics.

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Why does goofy stand erect while Pluto remains on all fours? They're both dogs!

Ever see the first Planet of the Apes? They bring regular-looking chimps & gorillas in & then genetically modify them to make them more intelligent & stand more-or-less erect, so that they can be used as slaves. Well that's what happened to Goofy.:P Lousy Humans!!
Speed Racer
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