What I love about Homer Simpson

[peacefuljeffrey 0]

My favorite thing about Homer is that even though most of the time he's a complete dolt, every once in a while, he busts out with tha mad skills.

To wit:

- When he fights Bart's bigger brother, even though he does get his back broken over a fire hydrant, he pulls out the ninja moves with throwing-starfish and some wicked punches.

- When he steals Lard Lad's "colossal donut," he uses a hook on a chain and he whips it up there through the hole on the first try, face grim with determination.

Help me think of other examples.
Blue skies,
-

-Jeffrey
"With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!"

[SpeedRacer 1]

"Stupid poetic justice!!" -Homer Simpson

Speed Racer
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[SpeedRacer 1]

Homer on relationships & TV:
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Homer: I hate all the programs Marge likes, but it's no big deal. You know why?
Selma: No.
Sideshow Bob: Go on.
Homer: Whenever Marge turns on one of her ``non-violent'' programs, I take a walk. I go to a bar, I pound a few, then I stumble home in the mood for looooove.

-----------------------------------

Speed Racer
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[peacefuljeffrey 0]

Okay, SpeedRacer... slowwwly... go baaaack... and reeeead... the paaaart... that said hellllp meeee think of other examples!

Blue skies,
-

-Jeffrey
"With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!"

[KevinMcGuire 0]

Favorite Homer quote

"There there Lisa, Just because I don't care doesn't mean that I don't understand"

[RoadRash 0]

D'OH!









~R+R
...MMMMmmmmmmmmmmmmmm....donuts....Hey, that's making me hungry......

~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~*~
Fly the friendly skies...^_^...})ii({...^_~...

[Vallerina 2]

I love Homer Simpson!
"If you don't like your job, you don't strike. You just go in everyday and do it really half-assed. That's the American Way."

"could you take the wheel for a second? I have to scratch myself in two places at once. "

"Donuts...is there anything they can't do?"

There's a thin line between Saturday night and Sunday morning

[feuergnom 22]

marge. have you been drinking?
homer. no!....... well ..... ten beers

The universal aptitude for ineptitude makes any human accomplishment an incredible miracle

dudeist skydiver # 666

[SpeedRacer 1]

Homer: "Ha ha! Look at this country! ? R U Gay!? Ha ha!" (looking at Uruguay on the globe)

Homer: "Facts are meaningless. You could use facts to prove anything that's even remotely true."
(hey, Homer sounds like the people in Speakers Corner!)

semi-skydiving related quotes:

Homer: "Son, when you participate in sporting events, it's not whether you win or lose; it's how drunk you get."

Homer: "Yeah Moe that team sure did suck last night. They just plain sucked! I've seen teams suck before, but they were the suckiest bunch of sucks that ever sucked."
(sounds like a 4 way scramble I was on once!!)

Speed Racer
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[Vallerina 2]

I saw the Homer Simpson roast last night! Great episode filled with great quotes!

There's a thin line between Saturday night and Sunday morning

[unformed 0]

This ad space for sale.

[panzwami 0]

Training for Whacking Day, in the backyard with the wooden pop-up snakes. He busts it out with the mad wicked kung fu flava.

[meltdown 0]

Mmmmm......floor pie.

[unformed 0]

When Lisa sneaks off to go to the museum to see the Egyptian Art Exhibit, Homer does a couple of really cool things.

First, when gets on the crane which rolls downhill and into a lake and sees Lisa. He explains to her: "You know how your heart was racing at a million miles a minute right then? Well I feel that all the time." They then break into the museum using some wicked moves and he gives her one of the best times of her life. They witness something nobody had seen in over 2000 years.

That episode was one of many that also showed that regardless of how much of a dufus Homer is, he really loves his family. The first episode was a prime example of that as well, when he works as Santa to get money for Christmas.

This ad space for sale.

[jimbarry 0]

Quote

he busts out with tha mad skills.

To wit:

- When he's about to drink a beaker of acid, Frank Grimes knocks it out of his hands and against the wall. Eats a hole in the wall. Burns asks who destroyed his wall. Behind Grimey's back Homer silently points at Grimey.

Not a whole lot of action there, but being quick with a subtle finger point at exactly the right moment saved his ass.

[peacefuljeffrey 0]

Quote

Training for Whacking Day, in the backyard with the wooden pop-up snakes. He busts it out with the mad wicked kung fu flava.

PERFECT! I'd forgotten that one! You're the first to actually comply with the request my thread made...
"Marge, should I whack slow, or fast?"
"Mmm, first slow, then fast. *giggle!*"

-

-Jeffrey
"With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!"

[peacefuljeffrey 0]

Homer also occasionally has flashes of brilliance (and not just when the crayon's been removed from his brain!):

Sitting in the bathroom wearing Henry Kissinger's eyeglasses, he quickly rattles off:

"The sum of the squares of the sides of an isosceles triangle equal the square of the remaining side."

and the guy in the next stall retorts:

"That's a right triangle, you idiot!"

-

-Jeffrey
"With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!"

[jimbarry 0]

Quote

"That's a right triangle, you idiot!"

Homage to the scarecrow in the wizard of oz. He gets his diploma from the wiz and rattles off that triangle riff. Problem was, what he said was wrong. Simpsons got it right. (as always...)

[lifewithoutanet 0]

My favorite one has got to be the episode where they remove (and subsequently replace) the crayon up his nose, poking his brain.

Removed, speaking to Flanders (example of mad skillz):
Homer: "I was working on a flat tax proposal and I accidentally proved there was no God."
Flanders: "We'll just see about tha.. oh.. maybe he made a mistake? Nope... it's airtight."

Crayon replaced (not so mad skillz):
Homer: "Extended warranty? How can I lose?"

-C.

[peacefuljeffrey 0]

Quote

Quote

"That's a right triangle, you idiot!"

Homage to the scarecrow in the wizard of oz. He gets his diploma from the wiz and rattles off that triangle riff. Problem was, what he said was wrong. Simpsons got it right. (as always...)

I've seen The Wizard of Oz exactly... once. When it was re-released in like '98 or so. Never noticed that scene you mentioned, or its correlation to The Simpsons.

That show is genius.

-

-Jeffrey
"With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!"

[PhillyKev 0]

I like when he orders the sublmiinal weight loss tapes but gets subliminal vocabulary tapes instead. He's talking like a walking thesaurus but keeps eating and getting fatter....and since his brain is already full he loses the knowledge of simple words, to wit:

Staring at bowl of ice cream.
"Marge, where's the.....metal dealie you dig food with?"

[flyhi 24]

"Marge, I'm coming to bed and I've been watching women's beach volleyball on ESPN."

Shit happens. And it usually happens because of physics.

[Chute 0]

Damn I read the subject line wrong.

I read "I made love to Homer Simpson"

Bottomless Beers and Blue Skies!

* Brother_Brian *
D.S.W.F.S.B. #2

[jimbarry 0]

Quote

the first to actually comply with the request my thread made...

Ahhh... Probably shoulda titled the thread "When Homer showed mad skillz...". Too much good stuff to read here on dz.com, so I think people just quick-read your title and started telling you why Homer's cool.

Btw, Bart showed some skillz himself nailing that bird with Nelson's bb-gun. One of the all time greatest lines by Nelson when Bart asks if he can shoot. "Sure... Never hurts to have two sets of prints on a gun."

[peacefuljeffrey 0]

Ooop, here I go hijacking my own thread, but who could forget when MR. BURNS showed da mad skillz... when he tried to steal back BOBO?!

Remember him shooting that cable to the Simpsons' house and sliding down it? (Didn't work the way it should, though. He and Smithers bumped into each other and stalled out.) Then they were suction-cupping across the kitchen ceiling when Homer came in for a little snack...

"Mmm... Sixty-four slices of American cheese...
Sixty-four...
sixty-three...
sixty-two...
.
.
.
twoooo...
onnnnnnne... "

Marge: "Homer, have you been up all night eating cheese?!"

Homer: "I think I'm blinnnnd!"

One of the most precious Simpsons scenes ever!

-

-Jeffrey
"With tha thoughts of a militant mind... Hard line, hard line after hard line!"