funks 1 #1 October 13, 2004 Here's the deal....5-6 months ago a very good friend of mine tells me he wants to go do a tandem and bring his girlfriend along for her birthday. Only catch is he doesnt have the cash and asks if i will pay. I agree with the understanding that he will pay me back ASAP. I agree and pay for their jumps (500+ bucks) Fast forward to today. He has mentioned the money he owes me maybe 3 times. Each time saying he needs more time to get the cash. However, him and his girlfriend manage to party every weekend. I am not talking about going out for drinks. I am talking about partying like rock stars with a certain substance that doesnt come cheap. This is an every weekend occurence. I have let it slide up until now. I do not need the cash, but I am growing more and more irritated knowing they have the funds availavble to party the way they do....so with that said...what the hell should i do? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
yoink 321 #2 October 13, 2004 Tell him you funded his jumps, not his substance abuse.... People who take advantage of their mates really irritate me! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
unformed 0 #3 October 13, 2004 I've loaned a few friends money in the past, but I also know who will pay me back, and who won't. Obviously, I won't loan money to someone who I doubt will pay me back. One friend, I'm probably loaned $50-100 about 20 times or so. He's always come up to me in two or three weeks and given me the money back. Sometimes I had even forgotten about it. Another friend, I loaned $100 in a casino after he lost what he brought. I normally wouldn't do that for anybody, but I trusted him. Anyways, not long after his dad passed away and he was gone for a few months. When he came back, I had completely forgotten about the money, but first thing he says is "I'm getting your money, I'll give it to you in about two weeks." I think it took about two months or so, but the main reason I wasn't concerned is that he never tried to avoid me when I was around, and he kept reminding me that he owed me money. I did get it without any kind of request. Another friend, I loaned about $300. I got royally screwed. I knew, however, I was screwed a few weeks after I loaned it, when he started giving excuses, and also started avoiding me. I'd confront him, get his reaction, tell him you need the money, even offer a payment plan. If he starts to avoid you after that, you're probably not going to get it.This ad space for sale. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
peregrinerose 0 #4 October 13, 2004 I gave my best friends parents my old car, never expected anything for it, but my best friend sent me payments every once in a while, to give me the blue book value of the car. When my boyfriend of 2 months hit black ice and totalled his car by sliding underneath a tractor trailer, I cosigned a $14K loan so that he could buy his jeep. (I have good credit, he does not). So if he didn't make his payments, I'd be responsible for that $14 K. That's a LOT of trust. So I married him 3 months later, so now he has to pay it back Do or do not, there is no try -Yoda Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
justaflygirl 0 #5 October 13, 2004 Stories like yours really irritate me, i feel so bad for you. Its not a point of needing the money, its the point that and agreement has been broken. I am the type that will give my last quarter to someone who needs it, and I only hope that if I am down on my luck I will run into someone the same way. If I were you I would do whatever it took to get your money or at least some of it and then get rid of the "friend"... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Ron 10 #6 October 13, 2004 Did you know they "Partied like Rock Stars" before you paid for the tandems? If so....loaning them the money was foolish. They could have not partied for a week or maybe two depending on the amount of partying they do. That was a bad investment risk. I have loaned people money on several occasions. I tend to not loan it to people I don't trust, or people I am not close friends with. I have had several cases bite me in the ass, one for about 500.00...But I let the cash go to keep the friend....However, they are not going to get another dime from me."No free man shall ever be debarred the use of arms." -- Thomas Jefferson, Thomas Jefferson Papers, 334 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Darius11 12 #7 October 13, 2004 QuoteTell him you funded his jumps, not his substance abuse.... People who take advantage of their mates really irritate me! dittoI'd rather be hated for who I am, than loved for who I am not." - Kurt Cobain Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
complexity 0 #8 October 13, 2004 I think you should tell him that you are cleaning up your finances and want to get your finances in order and ask him if he could pay you back his outstanding debt. And if he doesn't have all the money at that time, to set up a series of payments. Overall, I don't think its a good idea to lend money to friends because if the other person doesn't pay you back, it creates awkwardness and friction. Only if you know you can keep the two separate should you do it. On the other hand, you want to help out people you care about so it hard to not help them out. I think its best to look at each individual and see how responsible they are, and how considerate they are of other people in general. One friend I lent money to sent me a check the very next day because she knows that I did her a favor and didn't want to put me in the awkward position of asking again and again. However another friend I have lent money to in the past never paid me back, although I kept asking and asking her. And it put a serious rift between us. You should never have to be put in the awkward position of having to ask -- they should be responsible and thoughtful enough to do evereyting they can to pay you back, or at least tell you when they can. Just my two cents. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflir29 0 #9 October 13, 2004 I would demand the money now. Since I have NEVER seen any pussy worth $500+ I would have sex with his girlfriend and call it "interest." Obviously......don't get yourself into a situation like this again! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
McDuck 0 #10 October 13, 2004 Yeah, but if they truly "party like rock stars" then there's no telling what kind of "biological surprises" might be waiting to divide and conquer. Kevin - Sonic Beef #5 - OrFun #28 "I never take myself too seriously, 'cuz everybody know fat birds don't fly." - FLC Online communities: proof that people never mature much past high school. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
white_falcon 0 #11 October 13, 2004 My opinion, He is obviously NOT a good friend. A good friend would NEVER put you in this position. Demand the $$ back, and if not succesful, write off the friendship. Consider the $500 bucks payment for a lesson learned. A costly one, but better than ulcers worrying about it. Scott Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bobsled92 0 #12 October 13, 2004 get the cash or Repo something. That's what I did. If they are druggies, they'll be used to pawning things in trade._______________________________ If I could be a Super Hero, I chose to be: "GRANT-A-CLAUS". and work 365 days a Year. http://www.hangout.no/speednews/ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflir29 0 #13 October 13, 2004 QuoteYeah, but if they truly "party like rock stars" then there's no telling what kind of "biological surprises" might be waiting to divide and conquer. True........but blow jobs are normally fairly safe. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nightingale 0 #14 October 13, 2004 ask him to pay you back $20 every two weeks. When it's broken down into small sums, it's not so intimidating, and you'll probably get some of the cash back. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SkydiveNFlorida 0 #15 October 13, 2004 QuoteFast forward to today. He has mentioned the money he owes me maybe 3 times. Each time saying he needs more time to get the cash. However, him and his girlfriend manage to party every weekend. I am not talking about going out for drinks. I am talking about partying like rock stars with a certain substance that doesnt come cheap. This is an every weekend occurence. Had the SAME problem with a friend of mine. I paid for her Tandem and vid, and didn't see a dime until about 6 months later when I told her just to pay half because I probably owed her anyhow(riiight). She paid me back in 2 installments over the next few weeks. Lesson learned: Don't loan to irresponsible people who spend their $$ partying instead of paying debts. Luckily, I didn't NEED the cash, so I didn't worry about it, because at the time it wasn't worth it to me. We're still friends, I just know better than to loan her $$. -A Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflir29 0 #16 October 13, 2004 QuoteDon't loan to irresponsible people If you have to ask for the money........they aren't a friend as far as I'm concerned. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Paige 0 #17 October 13, 2004 NEVER ever, ever, ever, give out $$$$ expecting to get it back. Most of the time it won't happen Tunnel Pink Mafia Delegate www.TunnelPinkMafia.com Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
unformed 0 #18 October 13, 2004 QuoteQuoteDon't loan to irresponsible people If you have to ask for the money........they aren't a friend as far as I'm concerned. Amen to that. If anything, ask them once just in case they forgot. If you need to ask more than that you're not getting it back.This ad space for sale. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gravityizsexy 0 #19 October 13, 2004 Dude, your such an idiot for loaning out that much cash.. but I voted... and you wouldn't be out of line if you asked for some seX0r from the girlfriend lady.... but still get the cash back... DON'T EVER LOAN CASH EXPECTING IT BACK UNLESS YOU HAVE CONTRACTS.... DOH! -Tony "'Someday is not a day in my week'" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Keith 0 #20 October 13, 2004 Consider it a cheap lesson. Years ago I took out a $3000 loan for a room mate. The engine in his car blew up and he didn't have the money to pay for it. He asked, and I agreed to take out a loan for the money and he was supposed to make the payments. He didn't make a single payment. I learned then to never loan money I need back. If I 'loan' money and get it back, great, if not, oh well.Keith Don't Fuck with me Keith - J. Mandeville Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bch7773 0 #21 October 13, 2004 have him pay you back in installments. something like $20 bucks a week. then even if he only pays you the first week thats still $20 more then you have now MB 3528, RB 1182 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mnealtx 0 #22 October 14, 2004 QuoteConsider it a cheap lesson. Years ago I took out a $3000 loan for a room mate. The engine in his car blew up and he didn't have the money to pay for it. He asked, and I agreed to take out a loan for the money and he was supposed to make the payments. He didn't make a single payment. I learned then to never loan money I need back. If I 'loan' money and get it back, great, if not, oh well. Good point! I've "loaned" out several thousand dollars over the years. I've never treated it as a loan, but only said "Pay me back when and if you can". Nice surprise when someone gives some back, even if it's only a fraction of the amount...Mike I love you, Shannon and Jim. POPS 9708 , SCR 14706 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
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