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We Must Protect Our Daredevil Jobs From Cheap Foreign Labor

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To the casual circus attendee, the daredevil's job probably looks like it's all fun and games. But believe me, it's not nearly as easy as it seems. We daredevils put our lives on the line every day providing entertainment for the nation. Sure, we get to spend our days going over Niagara Falls in barrels and zooming around on motorcycles inside metal globes, but when the day is done, we're just like anyone else. We have families to raise, bills to pay, and looming fears that our jobs will be taken away by immigrants.

Daredevils have walked real tightropes for more than a century. Now, we walk metaphorical tightropes, too, with the unemployment line always looming beneath us.

Ten years ago, if you'd told me a daredevil from overseas could take away my job, I would've laughed in your face. I'd have told you all the greats were homegrown: Annie Taylor, Evel Knievel, that guy who climbed up the Golden Gate Bridge. All Americans, all classics. But our problem isn't a lack of talent: This country has plenty of men willing to put on a pair of roller skates and jump a row of 15 cars. The problem is that Ellis Island is crawling with Slovenians—each one more than willing to put on a pair of flaming roller skates and jump 20 cars for half the money.

Our notoriously porous borders are particularly vulnerable to human cannonballs and speeding motorcyclists from Mexico. There's nothing in place to quell the tide of daredevils flying over the Rio Grande and landing safely on American soil to steal our livelihoods. This rhinestone-studded locust swarm is prying the food right out of our death-defying mouths.

Worst of all, these foreigners have no regard for standards of conduct and safety. When you've been risking your life as long as I have, you learn how to better your odds with special nets and harnesses. We fought long and hard to make our ringmasters and fans see such precautions as necessities. All our years of hard work are shot to hell, though, the second some Indian agrees to be shot out of a cannon across a gorge with no net. Sure, a Kenyan will ride a unicycle across a 50-story-high steel beam without so much as a kneepad, and I grant you it's exciting. Gives me chills, and I'm a professional. But I guarantee you that the day something goes wrong, you'll wish you didn't have to explain to your kid why you took him out to see a man die. Hell, that's some show! Little Johnny'll never forget that one, that's for darn sure.

Look, what riles me up is not that this new group of daredevils is foreign-born, but that they don't care a whit about the sacred traditions of the profession of dare-devilry. Their devil-may-care attitude is jeopardizing the profession and everyone who has ever broken his back in its name. My great-grandparents came to this country from Italy with nothing but matching outfits and a dream to be the greatest silks-and-tissue aerialists the world had ever known. They had to invent themselves, one step at a time, like pioneers. My brothers and I devoted our lives to the stewardship of their proud tradition. Now, in the twilight of our lives, when we should be passing our gold lamé parachutes onto our sons, a reckless new breed from the hinterlands is usurping their birthright.

Take that French guy that calls himself Spider-Man. If he's French, shouldn't he call himself Spider-Homme? He's using an American daredevil name, but he's not even English! How about we let Americans climb American skyscrapers? You go climb the Eiffel Tower next time you're feeling frisky, Pepe. Leave the Sears Tower to us.

A lot of people say these outsiders are doing jobs no American wants, anyway. I strongly disagree. Flying through a burning hoop at a county fair may not be everyone's vision of the American dream, but shoot, you have to work your way up to igniting yourself at the top of Devils Tower. You build a name for yourself while you learn the ropes. But with the flood of cheap labor streaming over our borders, the bar has been raised. To secure a basic carnival job, beginner daredevils are forced to perform stunts so crazy, you'd think only someone who's suffered repeated head trauma would be willing to chance them.

When I think of the great opportunities I've had in this country, I am filled with pride. I've been wearing a star-spangled helmet for 20 years, risking life and limb to make people forget their problems, if only for a few minutes. I inspire people. They think, "If that man can remain in a tiger cage with a grizzly bear and four rattlesnakes for five minutes, what am I capable of?" But now, I must worry for my future. People no longer come to shows to see me cleverly cheat death with a bold display of showmanship—they want the possibility of death to be real and present. Face it: When I'm on the bill with some Angolan willing to bungee-jump 150 feet into a flaming barrel of gasoline while French-kissing a meth-stoked cobra, my stunt where I ride a tricycle across a tight-rope loses a little bit of its luster.
Looks like a death sandwich without the bread - Steve Deadman Morrell, BASE 174

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Hear, hear.

I have no idea what you're on about but I agree whole-heartedly.

I'll also take a gram of whatever you're hoovering to ease me out of my cacoon this evening.

Those foreign bastards need a stern talking to...no doubt.

Amen brother.

Btw, isn't Spiderman a Norgie? I've never seen a pic of him blowing hose so he can't be French.

What a fantabulous night for the cause.

Boy, am I fucked up tonight. Here's to James B. Beam and his splendid amber liquid.

460 rules!
:S:S:S:S:S:S
$kin.

Prizes to anyone who gets to read my posts before Mr Aiello's son, Tom deletes them.

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so... you're saying you're upset becuase they take bigger risks than you? Making them... more DARING could we say? hmmm...

America = Capitalism = Competition. Enjoy it.

-A
Abbie Mashaal
Skydive Idaho
Snake River Skydiving
TandemBASE

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He may be on something for sure.
But if he don't share.......Don't believe a word he say's
He is defiantly a Fascist, Liberal, Sympathizer.
...................

America = Capitalism = Competition. Enjoy it.

-A
........................

"Damn Strait"
.
.
.

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I say as Americans it is up to us to take it to the next level... we should start running odds and allow bets as the stunts begin even farther over the edge.. we can even change the name of the profession to "what fool thing will you do for money and fame?" and expand to the next generation of reality television.... :P
____________________________________
Those who fail to learn from the past are simply Doomed.

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How about we let Americans climb American skyscrapers? You go climb the Eiffel Tower next time you're feeling frisky, Pepe. Leave the Sears Tower to us.



This guy explores buildings in your country as you guys come over to Europe to explore 'our' cliffs!!!

It like us saying: ''Leave the European Big Walls to us!'' How would that make you feel...?

Peace out!

J.

www.vandrunen.ch

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No, people come to Europe to explore the women, the cliffs are just a bonus. :)
I don't know what is funnier, the original post or your reaction. You do realize it was all a joke right? Loosen the lederhosen... :P

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So you guys in UK are pretty save. Nobody comes to Europe to explore English girls.

Fido

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Look, apart from the dental decay and the lack of personal hygiene, English chicks are not that bad. :)

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Ah, that's why there will be quota next year. No more than one half of UK chick for one French beach.

Fido

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first Spiderman is from Norway,he will always have my deepest respect after he(SUPERMAN) took my unconcius body down from a tree even as his leg wasnt healed yet.B|

I do how ever agree that we sell our self cheep,but its the price,US $ are all that you US guys can see;)

Anyway just to make you feel better i invite you to my place,your welcome to come here and see if you like it the way arround here,just dont expect to get famus,after all we can jump whith out cameras,we dont really care if people look as us as cool or uncool,we do what we like for FREE and not to be an herro:P

Besides keep people like Skin on your site of the pond,we dont like his kind of people to play whith our girlsB|

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Face it: When I'm on the bill with some Angolan willing to bungee-jump 150 feet into a flaming barrel of gasoline while French-kissing a meth-stoked cobra, my stunt where I ride a tricycle across a tight-rope loses a little bit of its luster.


try it whith out a helmt and fire on the rope at both ends,it should do the job...:D

Stay safe
Stefan Faber

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Spiderman (Alain Robert) is French


sure but i spoke about:
http://www.offheading.com/offheaders.html
# 06030411 from Oslo:P

besides that,my old gc also were named spider,and a cool guy in Belgium also is named spider:P(only spiders i know but the above sure is spiderman aswell;)

Stay safe
Stefan Faber

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I just can't believe you silly f@ckers here didn't realize that this article was a parody, from a parody news website, [url"http://www.theonion.com"]the onion[/url]. But I guess, that's just because you foreigners have a inferiority (superiority?) complex ;)

Never go to a DZ strip show.

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I just can't believe you silly f@ckers here didn't realize that this article was a parody, from a parody news website, [url"http://www.theonion.com"]the onion[/url]. But I guess, that's just because you foreigners have a inferiority (superiority?) complex ;)



My question still stands :)
Kris.

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Interests: Movies, cricket, skydiving, skyflying.

What the hell are you doing in a BASE jumping forum?



:)
$kin.

Prizes to anyone who gets to read my posts before Mr Aiello's son, Tom deletes them.

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skin: Photography, erotica, needlework.


the same thing you are, more or less
Leroy


..I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw my bath toys were a toaster and a radio...

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'Cept mines a gag. Nobody jokes about cricket (except when using the expression "batting for the other side").

Leroy, I liked your avatar better when it had that geeky looking cunt in the wingsuit in it. Where did you get a picture of such a nerdy, narrow backed, parrot faced tit?

Chin chin,

;)

[edited to remove the word "twat" and insert "narrow backed, parrot faced tit"]
$kin.

Prizes to anyone who gets to read my posts before Mr Aiello's son, Tom deletes them.

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i forget, but if i remember correctly, it was hard to find

I am sure I have it saved somewhere....

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[edited to remove the word "twat" and insert "narrow backed, parrot faced tit"]



good idea, yea that might have been offensive... haha

you might have scared me into running to a moderator, JK
Leroy


..I knew I was an unwanted baby when I saw my bath toys were a toaster and a radio...

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Nobody jokes about cricket (except when using the expression "batting for the other side").



Or "Bowling from the pavilion end" which means the same thing.

-- Hope you don't die. --

I'm fucking winning

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Hi Ray

Competition??? Is that what you call making up all the rules of business and politics around the world??? And then killing those who don't want to submit & follow??????

:P:o
Stay Safe - Have Fun - Good Luck

The above could be crap, thought provoking, useful, or . . But not personal. You decide.

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Hi Ray

Competition??? Is that what you call making up all the rules of business and politics around the world??? And then killing those who don't want to submit & follow??????

:P:o



cuz that never happens in Europe...particularly not in Brussels...where they even make you rename chocolate if it contains less fat than the average pair of Lederhosen.

We don't want the world...we just want your half.

;)

Now if we can just bring religion and sexuality into this thread it will be another DZ.com classic. I don't think any act of BASE jumping has been even mentioned up to this point.

Awesome.

We rule! (Americans that is...:P)
$kin.

Prizes to anyone who gets to read my posts before Mr Aiello's son, Tom deletes them.

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We rule! (Americans that is...) :P


HA gotcha.. it should be "We role!(American that is...):P"

:D:ph34r:

Stay safe
Stefan Faber

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