Greg 0 #1 March 22, 2001 OK, no offense intended here, I thought this would be an appropriate place to share this:Ausssies: Believe you should look out for your mates.Brits: Believe that you should look out for those people who belong to your club.Americans: Believe that people should look out for and take care of themselves.Canadians: Believe that that's the government's job.Aussies: Dislike being mistaken for Pommies (Brits) when abroad.Canadians: Are rather indignant about being mistaken for Americans when abroad.Americans: Encourage being mistaken for Canadians when abroad.Brits: Can't possibly be mistaken for anyone else when abroad.Americans: Spend most of their lives glued to the idiot box.Canadians: Don't, but only because they can't get more American channels.Brits: Pay a tax just so they can watch 4 channels.Aussies: Export all their crappy programs, which no one there watches, to Britain, where everybody loves them.Americans: Love to watch sports on the idiot box.Brits: Love to watch sports in stadiums so they can fight with other fans.Canadians: Prefer to actually engage in sports rather than watch them.Americans: Will jabber on incessantly about football, baseball and basketball.Brits: Will jabber on incessantly about cricket, soccer and rugby.Canadians: Will jabber on incessantly about hockey, hockey, hockey, and how they beat the Americans twice, playing baseball.Aussies: Will jabber on incessantly about how they beat the Poms in every sport they played them in.Americans: Spell words differently, but still call it "English."Brits: Pronounce their words differently, but still call it "English."Canadians: Spell like the Brits, pronounce like Americans.Aussies: Add "G'day," "mate," and a heavy accent to everything they sayBrits: Shop at home and have goods imported because they live on an island.Aussies: Shop at home and have goods imported because they live on an island.Americans: Cross the southern border for cheap shopping, gas and liquor in a backwards country.Canadians: Cross the southern border for cheap shopping, gas and liquor in a backwards country.Aussies: Are extremely patriotic to their beer.Americans: Are flag-waving, anthem-singing, and obsessively patriotic to the point of blindness.Canadians: Can't agree on the words to their anthem, when they can be bothered to sing them.Brits: Do not sing at all but prefer a large brass band to perform the anthem.Americans: Drink weak, pissy-tasting beer.Canadians: Drink strong, pissy-tasting beer.Brits: Drink warm, beery-tasting piss.Aussies: Drink anything with alcohol in it.Brits: Are justifiably proud of the accomplishments of their past citizens.Americans: Are justifiably proud of the accomplishments of their present citizens.Canadians: Prattle on about how some of those great Americans were once Canadian.Aussies: Wollow on about how some of their past citizens were once outlaw Pommies, but none of that matters after several beers.Americans: Seem to think that poverty and failure are morally suspect.Canadians: Seem to believe that wealth and success are morally suspect.Brits: Seem to believe that wealth, poverty, success and failure are inherited things.Aussies: Seem to think that none of this matters after several beers.Canadians: Encourage immigrants to keep their old ways and avoid assimilation.Americans: Encourage immigrants to assimilate quickly and dump their old ways.Brits: Encourages immigrants to go to Canada or America.Canadians: Endure bitterly cold winters and are proud of it.Brits: Endure oppressively wet and dreary winters and are proud of it.Americans: Don't have to do either, and couldn't care less.Aussies: Don't understand what inclement weather means.Aussies: Have produced comedians like Paul Hogan and Yahoo Serious.Canadians: Have produced many great commedians, like John Candy, Martin Short, Jim Carrey, Dan Akroyd, and all the rest at SCTV.Americans: Think that these people are American!Brits: Have produced many great comedians, but Americans ignore them because they don't understand subtle humor. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
froggie 0 #2 March 22, 2001 Greg,i thought those people were american! hehe. guess im a typical yankee (in universal terms, an American, not a northerner) hehe. cute post. gives us some perspective on those 'other' people :) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Zennie 0 #3 March 22, 2001 Hehehe. Those were good. Thanks!We have a lot of Brits in our office so I forwarded it on to one of them.FWIW, given the slant of most of them I would hazard a guess they were written by an Aussie, but they aren't too far off the mark anyway. BTW. Hey skreamer, you need to supplement those with "South Africans". ------------Blue Skies!Zennie Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Slowfaller 0 #4 March 22, 2001 greg,that was good, but the brits did have monty python and , being american, i can recite the holy grail word for word. Cant leave monty python out, im definatly a monty python geek.blue skies, cold beer, air speed velocities of unladen swallowschris Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Dutchboy 0 #5 March 22, 2001 This is excellent, Greg. Only error I see is that nobody emmigrates to England. Why would anyone want to move to a tiny little island? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites FallDown 0 #6 March 22, 2001 i think you pretty much hit the nail on the head there old chap. what what.LOL. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites miked10270 0 #7 March 23, 2001 Hmmm...I see that the Natives are sounding a bit restless.Many many people have Immigrated to GREAT Britain in the past. Indeed we had so many that we had to get rid of our criminals at one point just to make room. Fortunately Australia was a bit wmpty at the time. there was another time we got rid of all our Psychos - Hello South Africa. Everyone without a sense of humour was sent to Canada. Everyone who couldn't SPELL "humour" was sent to America . Actually, the ones we sent to America were so thick they didn't even know that Tea is supposed to be made with Hot, Fresh Water, not Cold, Dirty, Boston Harbour water!!!Still, some of them have made it back (despite our best efforts in general). Particularly the New-Zealanders! Fortunately, once the New-Zealanders realise that ALL our sheep are diseased & can't date, they bugger off back home (so Foot-and Mouth is good for something!).As for all the Australian TV shows on UK TV... WE only show them to p!$$ off the antipodean population of Earls Court. We thought it'd get the returning convicts to go away, instead it only gives them something else to moan about besides the beer, the weather, & the lack of date-able sheep!As for Canada (which I balieve Greg is)... Canada is a country similar to it's population... normal at the bottom, but largely empty at the top!Mike D10270. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Zennie 0 #8 March 23, 2001 This whole thread reminds me a hilarious movie that dealt with that whole American/British culture clash thing... A Fish Called Wanda. Kevin Kline's character just killed me.------------Blue Skies!Zennie Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites BarrettJ99 0 #9 March 23, 2001 Slowfaller,Is that an African or European swallow?Blue skies-T1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Deleted 0 #10 March 23, 2001 QuoteAmericans: Drink weak, pissy-tasting beer.Canadians: Drink strong, pissy-tasting beer.Brits: Drink warm, beery-tasting piss.Aussies: Drink anything with alcohol in it.WRONG... We'll drink anything with alcohol in it if it's COLD. OorooMark F... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites skyhawk 2 #11 March 23, 2001 ahmen how come u wernt logged in Mark F Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites lazerq3 0 #12 March 23, 2001 YOUR MOTHER WAS A HAMSTER AND YOUR FATHER SMELT OF ELDABERRIES.... I FART IN YOUR GENERAL DIRECTION!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites BarrettJ99 0 #13 March 23, 2001 Lazerq,Go away or I will taunt you a second time!Blue skies-T1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites lazerq3 0 #14 March 23, 2001 RUN AWAY... RUN AWAY... RUN AWAY!!!!!!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Zach 0 #15 March 23, 2001 Can I say "Tis but a flesh wound..." or is that too easy. Let's play the same game with the Goonies, and I'm in. "Why don't we just pour chocolate on the floor and let Chunk EAT his way through!!!???" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites BenW 0 #16 March 23, 2001 We are the knights that say.... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites skyhawk 2 #17 March 23, 2001 am i the only one who has no idea what use r going on about Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites MarkF 0 #18 March 23, 2001 Quoteahmen how come u wernt logged in Mark FHmmm because I thought I was...:-)OorooMark F...And of course the weather forecast doesn't look as good as it could... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites skyhawk 2 #19 March 23, 2001 ha ha come up to ramblers Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites MarkF 0 #20 March 23, 2001 Quoteha ha come up to ramblersWish I could..... Wouldn't mind having a "Session" with Mad Cow. Followed by a LENGTHY conva..convales...recovery period of course...:-)I'm off to try out a new home this weekend.. Total Control at Colac. (The barwon heads bullshit gets to me...;-( ) Heard anything about Colac ? Seems to be a real small FRIENDLY relaxed C-182 DZ which suits me perfectly. Of course the fact that they don't do a million tandems helps as well...:-)OorooMark F...Say g'day to cow for me will you... ta...:-) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites skyhawk 2 #21 March 23, 2001 yer man i will im going up tommorow nah havnt heard much about it but is it the place with the gear store that looks pretty good Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Merrick 0 #22 March 23, 2001 Quote"We are the knights that say....""Nymph!""Peace & Blue Skies!" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites PLFKING 4 #23 March 23, 2001 Greg --Thanks for the great start to my day.....Laughed My F****** A** Off ! (not actually rolling on the floor, but I did bust out with a loud guffaw that momentarily startled my co-workers .....)The rest of you folks are either retarded, criminally insane, or just plain nuts -- thanks for making this site as great as it is !!The PLF Sultan Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Hellian 0 #24 March 23, 2001 Quote"We are the knights that say...."Ni!Ni!Ni!Ni!...Ni?...Ni!Ni!ahh classic times relived Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Merrick 0 #25 March 23, 2001 ROFL - Man, it's been YEARS since I've seen that.... I coulda' sworn it was Nymph.... Maybe not! "Ni Ni!" "Peace & Blue Skies!" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. Note: Your post will require moderator approval before it will be visible. Reply to this topic... × Pasted as rich text. 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FallDown 0 #6 March 22, 2001 i think you pretty much hit the nail on the head there old chap. what what.LOL. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
miked10270 0 #7 March 23, 2001 Hmmm...I see that the Natives are sounding a bit restless.Many many people have Immigrated to GREAT Britain in the past. Indeed we had so many that we had to get rid of our criminals at one point just to make room. Fortunately Australia was a bit wmpty at the time. there was another time we got rid of all our Psychos - Hello South Africa. Everyone without a sense of humour was sent to Canada. Everyone who couldn't SPELL "humour" was sent to America . Actually, the ones we sent to America were so thick they didn't even know that Tea is supposed to be made with Hot, Fresh Water, not Cold, Dirty, Boston Harbour water!!!Still, some of them have made it back (despite our best efforts in general). Particularly the New-Zealanders! Fortunately, once the New-Zealanders realise that ALL our sheep are diseased & can't date, they bugger off back home (so Foot-and Mouth is good for something!).As for all the Australian TV shows on UK TV... WE only show them to p!$$ off the antipodean population of Earls Court. We thought it'd get the returning convicts to go away, instead it only gives them something else to moan about besides the beer, the weather, & the lack of date-able sheep!As for Canada (which I balieve Greg is)... Canada is a country similar to it's population... normal at the bottom, but largely empty at the top!Mike D10270. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Zennie 0 #8 March 23, 2001 This whole thread reminds me a hilarious movie that dealt with that whole American/British culture clash thing... A Fish Called Wanda. Kevin Kline's character just killed me.------------Blue Skies!Zennie Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BarrettJ99 0 #9 March 23, 2001 Slowfaller,Is that an African or European swallow?Blue skies-T1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Deleted 0 #10 March 23, 2001 QuoteAmericans: Drink weak, pissy-tasting beer.Canadians: Drink strong, pissy-tasting beer.Brits: Drink warm, beery-tasting piss.Aussies: Drink anything with alcohol in it.WRONG... We'll drink anything with alcohol in it if it's COLD. OorooMark F... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skyhawk 2 #11 March 23, 2001 ahmen how come u wernt logged in Mark F Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lazerq3 0 #12 March 23, 2001 YOUR MOTHER WAS A HAMSTER AND YOUR FATHER SMELT OF ELDABERRIES.... I FART IN YOUR GENERAL DIRECTION!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BarrettJ99 0 #13 March 23, 2001 Lazerq,Go away or I will taunt you a second time!Blue skies-T1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lazerq3 0 #14 March 23, 2001 RUN AWAY... RUN AWAY... RUN AWAY!!!!!!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Zach 0 #15 March 23, 2001 Can I say "Tis but a flesh wound..." or is that too easy. Let's play the same game with the Goonies, and I'm in. "Why don't we just pour chocolate on the floor and let Chunk EAT his way through!!!???" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
BenW 0 #16 March 23, 2001 We are the knights that say.... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skyhawk 2 #17 March 23, 2001 am i the only one who has no idea what use r going on about Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MarkF 0 #18 March 23, 2001 Quoteahmen how come u wernt logged in Mark FHmmm because I thought I was...:-)OorooMark F...And of course the weather forecast doesn't look as good as it could... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skyhawk 2 #19 March 23, 2001 ha ha come up to ramblers Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
MarkF 0 #20 March 23, 2001 Quoteha ha come up to ramblersWish I could..... Wouldn't mind having a "Session" with Mad Cow. Followed by a LENGTHY conva..convales...recovery period of course...:-)I'm off to try out a new home this weekend.. Total Control at Colac. (The barwon heads bullshit gets to me...;-( ) Heard anything about Colac ? Seems to be a real small FRIENDLY relaxed C-182 DZ which suits me perfectly. Of course the fact that they don't do a million tandems helps as well...:-)OorooMark F...Say g'day to cow for me will you... ta...:-) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skyhawk 2 #21 March 23, 2001 yer man i will im going up tommorow nah havnt heard much about it but is it the place with the gear store that looks pretty good Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Merrick 0 #22 March 23, 2001 Quote"We are the knights that say....""Nymph!""Peace & Blue Skies!" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PLFKING 4 #23 March 23, 2001 Greg --Thanks for the great start to my day.....Laughed My F****** A** Off ! (not actually rolling on the floor, but I did bust out with a loud guffaw that momentarily startled my co-workers .....)The rest of you folks are either retarded, criminally insane, or just plain nuts -- thanks for making this site as great as it is !!The PLF Sultan Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Hellian 0 #24 March 23, 2001 Quote"We are the knights that say...."Ni!Ni!Ni!Ni!...Ni?...Ni!Ni!ahh classic times relived Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Merrick 0 #25 March 23, 2001 ROFL - Man, it's been YEARS since I've seen that.... I coulda' sworn it was Nymph.... Maybe not! "Ni Ni!" "Peace & Blue Skies!" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites