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mikeff

Skydivers and Whuffos

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Is it possible for a skydiver and a whuffo to have a long lasting relationship? Me and my girlfriend are breaking up and i think it has to do with me skydiving. I have been jumping for almost three years and going out with her for two, and when we started, i told her that skydiving was part of who i am and i will never give it up. I have been told by some skydivers that relationships with whuffos never last and i am started to think that that is a true statement.

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Hi Mike, welcome.
I think it just depends on the type of relationship it is. If your s/o has a busy life, and doesn't mind that you hang out at the dz alot, then it is usually cool. But I could see how whuffo's would get jealous about your time spent at the dz. Is it your time away from your s/o that is the problem, or skydiving itself?

my 2 cents... B|
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Be glad of life, because it gives you the chance to love and to work and to play and to look up at the stars.

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Sorry to hear that, dude. I recently started jumping and even more recently began a relationship with an incredible gal. We had the "talk" last night. I told her that if there were any reservations about me skydiving, tell me now. I think she understands about as much as a whuffo could be expected to. She'll go to the DZ w/ me but there is no way in hell I'll get her into the plane! I know I won't be able to jump as much as w/o her, but I'm willing to pay the price.

Did she give you any indication it was the skydiving? Is it worth salvaging?





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I usually am at the DZ about once a weekend, and usually i am too tired to go out afterwards, but the problem is basically skydiving espcially after I had 2 cutaways 4 days apart.

Ths relationship is about to end, and I feel that trying to salvage would be unbeneficial.

Any skydiving chicks within the S. florida area lurking these forums?? ;)
The edge ... there is no honest way to explain it because the only people who know where it is are those that have gone over - Hunter S. Thompson

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Sounds like you have made up your mind. I think skydiving, (just like any other passion) and realtionships have to be compromised on. I personally have dated a lot of musicians... we had gigs every weekend, I stayed up until 4am every weekend with them, loading gear in & out, going to practices, etc... I would expect the same support from a whuffo guy with my skydiving. ;)
______________________________________
Be glad of life, because it gives you the chance to love and to work and to play and to look up at the stars.

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Well the me and her are pretty much over, but there was, as I suspected, someone else:(. Is it me or are all women all the same, or am I just having bad luck. Two years of my life down the drain. On the bright side, I can spend more time at the dz, and spend more money on jumps.
The edge ... there is no honest way to explain it because the only people who know where it is are those that have gone over - Hunter S. Thompson

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IMHO - I try and think of it this way... Everyone is different, guys and girls. So I try really hard not to judge every guy or girl cause of a few bad relationships.
I would also try and look at all the good memories you have of those 2 years, instead of the bad ones. I have been divorced now for about 4 years, and I have nothing but good memories left of my X. Even though he did things that I thought were never forgivable. You live and learn, why be held back by experiences that seem bad at the time, but in the long run may be a blessing in disguise? Don't think of those 2 years as a waste... you learned from it hopefully. ;)
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Be glad of life, because it gives you the chance to love and to work and to play and to look up at the stars.

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Absolutely! It just depends how you integrate skydiving into your lives. For some people it's a way of life and if she's not willing to adapt to that lifestyle it probably won't work. If it's just a hobby that you do during your freetime just make sure that you don't put her on the back burner and give her the time she deserves too!:)

Katie
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Is it possible for a skydiver and a whuffo to have a long lasting relationship?



Hello all! I'm new to the forums, so just let me say this place is awesome!

As for your question, my own personal experience is that it doesn't work. I started jumping in '97, then meet my future wife who did do a tandem but that was it - no more for her. We got married in 99 and I did my last jump in 99. Something never seemed right and I would always catch myself daydreaming at my desk or looking up at the sky with a vacant look on my face - a lot of my wife's friends thought I was being anti-social (I was just really concentrating on holding my slot but how do you tell that to someone who has no clue?) The marriage didn't last and we're in the middle of the divorce now. A couple of weeks ago, I went out to the first DZ I could find and did my recurrency dives. The first jump, after landing, I fell to my knees and cried - it felt so good to be back in the air, to be back in the company of people who really enjoy life and who have the addiction! If you can find a wuffo that "get's it" more power to you but I think those nuggets are few and far between. (as with anything however, those are just my opinions!)

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I don't think it's possible to have a lasting relationship with a whuffo unless you enjoy hearing, "skydiving is more important than me". To which I respond, IT SURE IS!;)



Amen to that. :P
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Blue Skies and May the Force be with you.

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If you can find a wuffo that "get's it" more power to you but I think those nuggets are few and far between.



I guess there are a lot of those nuggets here in Colorado. I know of a high number of male skydivers that are married to non-skydivers, and it seems to work for them.

IMO, if a relationship is going to work, it's all about compromise. Both parties have to be willing to make it work.
May your trails be crooked, winding, lonesome, dangerous, leading to the most amazing view. May your mountains rise into and above the clouds. - Edward Abbey

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Absolutely! It just depends how you integrate skydiving into your lives. For some people it's a way of life and if she's not willing to adapt to that lifestyle it probably won't work. If it's just a hobby that you do during your freetime just make sure that you don't put her on the back burner and give her the time she deserves too!:)



I agree. It's not that a whuffo can't deal with the skydiving addiction necessarily, although I truly believe some can't. I think it depends on how well you balance all the aspects of your life. The SO should be included in your dealings with skydiving and with the friends you make at the DZ. They should never feel left out, and even though they shouldn't expect you to slow down or stop jumping (if you care about a person, why would you want them to change?), you should be sure that your time together is measured in quantity AND quality. Never make them feel that jumping is "more important", even if sometimes it is.
On the other hand, if you try to include your SO in this part of your life, and they adamently refuse to be a part of it, the relationship won't last, and trying to hang onto it will only cause both of you pain.


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Blondes do have more fun!

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IMO, if a relationship is going to work, it's all about compromise. Both parties have to be willing to make it work.



No arguement from me. I totally agree. I tried to go the way of giving up diving to give more time to my S/O and that sure as heck didn't work. I just think it would be easier to find someone that shares your passion for jumping.

Buyer beware!
Scars remind us that the past is real

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Sorry to hear about your relationship ending[:/] I think a lot has to do with being a giver or taker on both parts of the relationship. If your SO is more of a taker I can see it not lasting if she's not a skydiver & dating only skydivers might be the best option for ya. I hope this made sense:S Good Luck
~Porn Kitty
WARNING: Goldschlager causes extreme emotional outbursts!

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. Is it your time away from your s/o that is the problem, or skydiving itself?



Just curious is it a question of insecurity, or co-dependancy?

I was (maybe still) having a similar situation. She's just gonna have to learn to get over it. I make time sacrifices. I only go out there once a weekend. UInless she wants to go party out with our friends. Then there is a Friday appearance.

Anyway,
My s/o finally did her first tandem last weekend at the Summer Jam Boogie. I am very proud of her. It was also very memorable for me to be able to wave at her as I jumped out backwards from the otter...she says that was the coolest thing she ever witnessed...I told her to wait...she's gonna see shit she never dreamed of...

So,

She says that she get's it. I don't think she really does. It was more of an amusment park ride for her. She had me get her another tandem ride already. But I think that she will have a hang-up about the cessna. I hope she goes through with it. I also hope that she does it for her, not for me. That is the most important part of the deal. She HAS to do it fior her.

We'll see.
I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama
BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun

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Welcome back to the skies, and just keep it together, or at least as much as you can.....always jump with a clear head.
"According to some of the conservatives here, it sounds like it's fine to beat your wide - as long as she had it coming." -Billvon

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About your actual question/objective, it is not a matter if they are whuffo or not, it should be more a matter of someone who likes who you are, and not someone interested in changing what you do and like.....

Blue skies...
"According to some of the conservatives here, it sounds like it's fine to beat your wide - as long as she had it coming." -Billvon

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