PhillyKev 0 #1 August 16, 2004 A man and a woman meet at a bar and are very attracted to each other. They both have a few drinks and decide to leave together. When they walk outside they're immediately all over each other and can't wait to get somewhere more private. So they go out behind the bar and behind some bushes there are railroad tracks where they start going at it. They're having a good old time when next thing you know, a train is approaching. The engineer sees them on the tracks and starts blowing his horn. They keep going at it. The engineer lets out a long, loud blast but they don't show any signs of getting out of the way. He slams on the brakes, throws it in reverse and comes to a stop inches away from the couple who has just finished and slowly gets up to get dressed. The engineer jumps out of the train and starts yelling, "What the hell? I almost killed you, didn't you hear me coming?" The guy replies, "Look, pal, you were coming, she was coming, I was coming. You were the one with the brakes!" Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
champu 1 #4 August 16, 2004 haha, wait I get it... it's funny cause the guy's an idiot. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 212 #5 August 16, 2004 Quotehaha, wait I get it... it's funny cause the guy's an idiot. Don't call Phillykev an Idiot! He's no idiot. He is just miseducated.I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PhillyKev 0 #6 August 16, 2004 Wasn't me. I haven't had sex on rail road tracks since high school Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #7 August 16, 2004 They say Golden Eagles go up really high, lock on, and do it in freefall. Some have been killed because they didn't finish. Around 200 ft, I'd have been faking it. "Yeah baby, that was great. You're the best. I'll call... really." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Brains 2 #8 August 16, 2004 QuoteAround 200 ft, I'd have been faking it. "Yeah baby, that was great. You're the best. I'll call... really." Bill, you win for the funniest fucking quote ever!!! Never look down on someone, unless they are going down on you. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kennedy 0 #9 August 16, 2004 QuoteQuoteAround 200 ft, I'd have been faking it. "Yeah baby, that was great. You're the best. I'll call... really." Bill, you win for the funniest fucking quote ever!!! [comic book guy voice] Best... Quote... Ever... [/voice]witty subliminal message Guard your honor, let your reputation fall where it will, and outlast the bastards. 1* Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Guest #10 August 16, 2004 Two British gentlemen meet by chance on Fleet Street. They hit it off and decide to have lunch together. The more they chat, the more the find that they have common interests, so they stay for hours. Finally they leave the restaurant, and one asks the other: "By the way, are you gay?" "No," says the second man. "I'm not." And the first says... "...A pity, isn't it?" mh ."The mouse does not know life until it is in the mouth of the cat." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 212 #11 August 16, 2004 I don't get it.I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PhillyKev 0 #12 August 16, 2004 QuoteI don't get it. "The more they chat, the more the find that they have common interests, so they stay for hours. " But neither is gay. Get it? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 212 #13 August 16, 2004 QuoteQuoteI don't get it. "The more they chat, the more the find that they have common interests, so they stay for hours. " But neither is gay. Get it? Nope.I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ACMESkydiver 0 #14 August 16, 2004 Quotehaha, wait I get it... it's funny cause the guy's an idiot. No no, Shampoo!!! It's VERY funny! The punchline is awesome: QuoteThe guy replies, "Look, pal, you were coming, she was coming, I was coming. You were the one with the brakes!" Tee-hee, tee-hee.... How could you not find that hilarious?? "You were the one with the brakes..." ah-haaa.... Just a side note, obviously he and she did not ever have children. If you have children, you DO have brakes that must be applied immediately when the sleepy toddler comes crawling up into bed with you... Puts a halt to things right-quick. ~Jaye Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kennedy 0 #15 August 16, 2004 I thought the funny part was that they were British, so they were so in love with themselves that when they met each other (very similar) they fell in love, but they're not gay so they're SOL. Or it could just be that they're British witty subliminal message Guard your honor, let your reputation fall where it will, and outlast the bastards. 1* Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
ACMESkydiver 0 #16 August 16, 2004 Oh puh-lease, people.... Two people with so much in common enjoying time together is such a rarity to find...and the ironic part is that they can't take it to the next level. Get it?? Geesh...~Jaye Do not believe that possibly you can escape the reward of your action. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Steph2 0 #17 August 17, 2004 Quote I thought the funny part was that they were British, so they were so in love with themselves Eh?!!! QuoteOr it could just be that they're British I say again... Eh?!!! I get both the jokes, but I just don't get the reply... What you saying about us Brits? Are you starting something?!!! Steph -x- Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
PhillyKev 0 #18 August 17, 2004 A doctor walked into a bank. Preparing to endorse a check, he pulled a rectal thermometer out of his shirt pocket and tried to 'write' with it. Realizing his mistake, he looked at the thermometer with annoyance and said, "Well that's great, just great... some asshole's got my pen." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #19 August 17, 2004 How do you tell the difference between a rectal thermometer and an oral one? Taste. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
quatorze 1 #20 August 17, 2004 QuoteHow do you tell the difference between a rectal thermometer and an oral one? Taste. shudder I'm not afriad of dying, I'm afraid of never really living- Erin Engle Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
