stoneycase 0 #1 February 7, 2006 Ok, so I need some help/advice/input from an unbiased 3rd party. Here's the situation: I rent a house from a landlady who I've known for a year. The house is 3bd/2ba. Rent is $2175/mo, not including utilities ($725/room). I have 2 roomates. The landlady stipulates in the lease that she will only accept 1 check for rent, by the 3rd of every month. I am always the one to write the check, as I am the "high wage earner" of the house (by quite a lot, 1 roomate is in college, another works at Starbucks) and I am the one who speaks directly to the landlady on a regular basis. All 3 names are on the lease, with 3 separate signatures. I moved into this house in March of 05. Since then one roomate has moved out, and another young girl has moved in. My other roomate, a great guy and good friend, has been with me for over 3 years (came with from another pad in same area). The young girl that has moved in, lets call her "Jane" is the problem. In January she bounced a check to our Cable Co, Cox. We pay our bills with 3 checks. That is, one bill comes in, 3 equal checks go out. I do it this way to ensure nobody ever owes anyonelse any money. I'm sure the utility companies hate us, but I've never heard any complaints. I think they just want their money...Anyway, the check she bounces is for $67.XX. Not a big deal I tell her, we'll wait to see the fee on the next bill, and you can just pay the $67.XX, plus fee, plus current bill (her share, of course). Come 1 Feb I have in my hot little hands a check from my buddy for $725, and a check from Jane for $725. I take the checks to my bank and deposit them. I now have $2400-$2500 in the account, plenty to cover rent. I dont have any other outstanding bills, so I'm feeling good. Rent's covered again, I can continue with my measly existence. I go drop off my $2175 check to my landlord by leaving it in her mailbox, as always. That was 2 Feb. Well lo and behold I go to the ATM today to deposit other funds (on an unrelated issue) and I print a receipt. My account is WAY WAY short and no longer above $2175. I start stressing. I get back to work, check online, sure enough, a $725 check has bounced. My bank withdrew the funds and charged me a nominal fee. SHIT! So I call Jane and leave a rather unhappy voicemail: "Jane we have a huge huge issue. I'm not sure if this is your check, but I can only assume that it is, since you bounced the check to Cox. This is really really bad, I'm very pissed off. There are now 3 sets of fees coming my way: the one I already have from my bank, another from my bank when Landlady cashes my check, and a 3rd form the landlady herself (per terms of lease)." I get off the phone, and call my bank: "What is the name on the check that bounced??" Bank Lady: "Jane E. Doe" MOTHERFUCKER!!! I hang up. I call Jane back. This time Jane answers: "Jane did you get my voicemail?" "No I saw that you called, I haven't listened yet" "Well we have a huge issue, your check bounced" "Yeah I thought that might happen, my dad called me and told me he thought he deposited my money late." "WTF" I scream, what do you mean you thought this might happen?? Why didn't you tell me?? Bla bla, can't remember what she said "Jane this is a huge deal, the lease is up at the end of next month. This is my rent, Arthur's rent, OUR house! What are you doing writing me a $725 check when you don't have the money??" "Well I thought I did, I thought my Dad deposited on time." "Why didn't you check online? You already use my computer regularly...and you have your own...and you have the telephone. What the hell were you thinking??" "James, you're being really rude, there is a calmer way to handle this." "Jane, I can't believe you are expecting sympathy from me here. I told you very clearly when you moved in my priorities were 1 - pay all bills on time with good money and 2 - keep house clean/good condition by not having tons of people over and being respectful of myself and Arthur. You can't seem to do either. I suggest you get UP OFF YOUR ASS and fix this!!!" "James I am up off my ass, what do you want me to do?" "I want you to stop fucking around, go down to my bank, deposit $725 in cash or via cashier's check, and hope that our landlady hasn't deposited my check yet." "Well I have to go to class now, so I can deposit the money when I get out of class." I just hang up, completely frustrated with blood boiling at damn near 100deg C. To put this in perspective, this girl is 22, and still going to College. She's young, blonde, attractive, and living off mom and dad. She's from So Cal, comes from plenty of money (Mom & Dad driving BMW/Benz), and does not live off "ramen noodles". I on the other hand, work for a living, I'm 25. I'm trying to make a career. Trying to balance work, fun, responsibility, etc. To me, my word, when it comes to business and money is the most important thing on this planet. I do what I say *always* to ensure that things like this NEVER happen. So my question is this then: Was I far too tough on my roomate by 1 - getting angry on the phone 2 - using profanity 3 - making demands (reasonable imho) 4 - assuming that my landlady will be extremely unhappy with this Or, was my response adequate? 1 - I relayed the importance of the situation 2 - I *emphasized* this was not something to be swept under the rug 3 - I provided solutions to solve the problem 4 - I made sure Jane understood this could have additional implications I'll be headed home at 430-500PST, and I'm sure Jane will be there. I've either got to calm myself, apologize, and let her know that I'm sorry but that this is something upsetting to me, or I've got to re-emphasize that this is wholly unacceptable and demonstrates extremely poor judgement on her end. My feelings are, of course, I am justified. My plan is to re-emphasize, hope for the best, no longer accept checks from her (except for util bills), and indicate to her that I will not be looking to keep her on as a roomate come 31 Mar/1 Apr. Stop me, Congratulate me, or request pics. ;) Multi answers are available!! (phew, blood pressure decreasing as a result of writing this post, thanks dz.com!)Does whisky count as beer? - Homer There's no justice like angry mob justice. - Skinner Be careful. There's a limited future in low pulls - JohnMitchell Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cocheese 0 #2 February 7, 2006 You said Hard On.No i didn't even read your thread. Can you shorten it for me ? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
tigra 0 #3 February 7, 2006 Don't apologize. Throw her ass out or make sure her dad sends you the rent money directly. She's obviously too much of a child to do it on her own. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lisamariewillbe 1 #4 February 7, 2006 room mate bounced a check for rent , he said "what the fuck" she said "your rude" whose right?Sudsy Fist: i don't think i'd ever say this Sudsy Fist: but you're looking damn sudsydoable in this Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
stoneycase 0 #5 February 7, 2006 hahah, i figured that might be a problem...here's the nutshell version: roomate writes check to me for rent i write check to landlady i find out today roomate bounced her check to me roomate seems to think it's a non-issue, i disagree, strongly should i A - tear her f***ing head off, this is the second time she's done this B - take a chill pill, and understand that we're all "special" in our little way and i should be "flexible" and "sympathetic" to her plight.Does whisky count as beer? - Homer There's no justice like angry mob justice. - Skinner Be careful. There's a limited future in low pulls - JohnMitchell Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
gmittar 0 #6 February 7, 2006 You got your point across, don't apollogize, but don't be an ass when you go home. Tell it like it is, unnacceptable. |>.<| Seriously, W.T.F. mate? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NtheSeaOrSky 0 #7 February 7, 2006 If she isn't responsible with money and it is just handed to her, she probably honestly has no idea why you are upset. I also think it was good for her to experience *discomfort* for her actions. Get the $ from her for the bounced fees and make her pay in cash or enough ahead of time that check has cleared by the time you need it if it is an issue with you. You can't change what has happened, only lessen the chances of it happening again in the future.Life is not fair and there are no guarantees... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
cocheese 0 #8 February 7, 2006 The woman is always right. Sheesh. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
waltappel 1 #9 February 7, 2006 You were nowhere *near* hard enough on her. Get rid of her. Walt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jjiimmyyt 0 #10 February 7, 2006 No, she passed a dud check on you, throw her out, unless she can pay you a month in advance from now on. YOU are not her parents, and unless she's going to start calling you daddy in another 'way' you dont need that shit. Pics would be cool tho'. "This isn't an iron lung, people. You can actually disconnect and not die." -Dave Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
stoneycase 0 #11 February 7, 2006 You know that was one of the first things that crossed my mind: Spoiled little rich girl is still getting moms and dads money. She has no concept of spending money that you actually *earn*/money mgmt. But she does have a part-time job, so she must, at least partially, understand...I hope... I do plan to provide her with copies of all bills related to fees. Problem is, I have to pay them *now* and then collect from her - wonderful... I'm also planning on no longer accept personal checks from her. If her dad wants to send me a check then fine, but he and I will need to speak first over the phone. Otherwise, it's cash or cash equivalent (cashier's check, direct trans from bank to bank, etc). But I like your point, no sense stewing over it, a solution is in place - just move fwd. Which for me, means going home for beer. (speaking of, any of you try the 5L Heine keg yet? I def reccomend!! best tasting Heineken I've had, ingenious little tap too)Does whisky count as beer? - Homer There's no justice like angry mob justice. - Skinner Be careful. There's a limited future in low pulls - JohnMitchell Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bob.dino 0 #12 February 7, 2006 Quotemake her pay in cash or enough ahead of time that check has cleared by the time you need it if it is an issue with you. This. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
stoneycase 0 #13 February 7, 2006 If the man Walt says my response was Ok, than that's good enough me. No Walt, ya don't know me, but I've read a ton of your posts - and I like your style(and stories, lol). For the pic requesters...let me see what I can do...no promises.Does whisky count as beer? - Homer There's no justice like angry mob justice. - Skinner Be careful. There's a limited future in low pulls - JohnMitchell Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
flyinghonu 0 #14 February 7, 2006 QuoteTo put this in perspective, this girl is 22, and still going to College. She's young, blonde, attractive, and living off mom and dad. She's from So Cal, comes from plenty of money (Mom & Dad driving BMW/Benz), and does not live off "ramen noodles". Nothing more needed - unfortunately, not only am I irritatingly familiar with these types of bitches, I get to work with them after they have graduated college and have never worked a day in their life until they get to me. They are usually shocked that someone wants them to do something they cannot ask Mommy or Daddy to take care of. Unfortunately, these types will always find a reason that it is not THEIR fault (i.e. you're being rude, the check was deposited too quickly, my dad was late, I have class, blah, whine, blah, whine.....). Edited to add: please post of pic of this chic so I know to avoid her ass when she comes back to So Cal and has to work b/c Mommy & Daddy have stopped paying for her Beamer, etc. "Excuse me while I kiss the sky..." - Jimi Hendrix Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mdrejhon 8 #15 February 7, 2006 A compromise action: Ask for contact information for her family. That way, you can report when the cheque bounces (but do so in a calm manner without profanity) and request the refund of all fees. You can pull this off using "legal" means: You could make a new lease agreement and require her family act as the co-signer, necessitating addictional contact information and additional responsibility. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NtheSeaOrSky 0 #16 February 7, 2006 Beer always makes it better To her, the bounced check fee is probably just 'more money to get from parents' hence no big deal. She is not in a position where it inconveniences her much. Until she has had to make some hard choices, she probably won't get it. Since it has not been a problem in the past, explain to the landlord (if need be) what happened (short version) and that you have taken steps to make sure it doesn't happen again. She more than likely won't get too upset since it is not a constant problem.Life is not fair and there are no guarantees... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skybytch 259 #17 February 7, 2006 Definitely insist that she pay rent and her portion of the bills in cash. If you haven't already, I'd suggest calling your landlord immediately and letting her know the situation. She's likely to be much less upset if she finds out the check's going to bounce from you instead of from her bank. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
stoneycase 0 #18 February 7, 2006 I guess that's the kicker for me...I try not to stereotype, honestly. And it isn't easy, dealing with guys and girls from So Cal on a regular basis, and a lot of them with $$ (the area i live in is fairly wealthy, with a fairly expensive Univ of CA nearby). I find the exact same thing you do. I had hoped Jane would be different. She seemed to be different in certain aspects (cleaning up after herself, buying little things for the house, respecting others, etc) but in the most important aspect: paying bills - she's failed horribly. Honestly, I'm fairly certain that she just "assumed" mom and dad would deposit on time. I'm sure she never bothered to check. I mean why should she? She only wrote me a check for $725, that I deposited that same day (I even told her this, it's also SOP for me). At the heighth of my frustration, I thought about telling Jane to have Daddy call me, so Daddy and I could have words. I'm figuring now that would be a a bad idea, since I'd probably just tell him he's a p.o.s. and his laziness has cost me money, time, and sanity. (or perhaps i cost myself that last one...eh, w/e)Does whisky count as beer? - Homer There's no justice like angry mob justice. - Skinner Be careful. There's a limited future in low pulls - JohnMitchell Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lisamariewillbe 1 #19 February 7, 2006 QuoteAsk for contact information for her family Technically that isnt his place to ask. QuoteYou could make a new lease agreement and require her family act as the co-signer, necessitating addictional contact information and additional responsibility Unless it states in the lease that a bounce check is cause for termination of lease then there is no legal way to do this. People bounce checks, regardless if she is daddys rich little girl she does have rights. The landlord will add fees the girl will have to pay them and well do not take cash from her anymoreSudsy Fist: i don't think i'd ever say this Sudsy Fist: but you're looking damn sudsydoable in this Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
waltappel 1 #20 February 7, 2006 QuoteIf the man Walt says my response was Ok, than that's good enough me. No Walt, ya don't know me, but I've read a ton of your posts - and I like your style(and stories, lol). For the pic requesters...let me see what I can do...no promises. You wouldn't believe how much of a sucker for women I am and not even *I* would put up with that crap. That should tell you something. Thanks for the compliments! Walt Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
stoneycase 0 #21 February 7, 2006 Yeah...originally I was thinking: Don't call the landlady, get the cash deposited, it'll be available the next biz day. The rent check to landlady hasn't cashed/deposited yet, hope it doesn't get in tonight or tomorrow AM. But now, I am thinking more along the lines of what you are saying. A short voicemail (as that's normally what i get to the landlady) explaining that if she could hold the rent check for 1-2 additional business days that would ensure funds would be available. Of course, indicate that the problem was not on my end, but on Jane's.Does whisky count as beer? - Homer There's no justice like angry mob justice. - Skinner Be careful. There's a limited future in low pulls - JohnMitchell Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
karenmeal 0 #22 February 7, 2006 Am I the only one who will admit that I've done this before? I've written a check to a roommate before and it accidentally bounced. I tried to remedy the situation right away, but unfortunately I was out of town and really clueless on what to do to get the money to him immediately. I later apologized and it never happened again, it was the last time I've bounced a check. If she respects the other aspects of your living arrangement and this check and the other check are the only problems so far then I would just say that you should request cash from her for bills from now on. Sucks that you got hosed, but is there any chance that the reason you wanted this girl as a roommate is because she was a hot blonde 22 year old? If that is the case, then you asked for it. Next time pick someone who is older and more financially responsible. -Karen "Life is a temporary victory over the causes which induce death." - Sylvester Graham Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wmw999 2,149 #23 February 7, 2006 Make it a pain in the ass for her. Cash or cashier's checks or wire transfer (the day before). Don't take a check from her dad, what if it comes late? Don't yell at her any more, just treat her like she's an employee that messed up and you're trying to correct. Your goal is to make sure that this generally otherwise-OK roommate doesn't leave you in the lurch on the rent or any bills again. You're not being mean there, you're just making sure that there won't be any additional expenses or hassles to you because of her. You can even tell her that you can go back to the status quo after a year or something (she probably won't last that long, but if she does, the hassle will probably have taught her a lesson by then). You can apologize for the tone of voice if you desire, but definitely not for the strength of your feelings or the fact that you're angry at her. Wendy W.There is nothing more dangerous than breaking a basic safety rule and getting away with it. It removes fear of the consequences and builds false confidence. (tbrown) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Broke 0 #24 February 7, 2006 The only way she should be able to make it up is cash and sex. If she's gonna fuck you it might as well be in a good wayDivot your source for all things Hillbilly. Anvil Brother 84 SCR 14192 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
leapdog 0 #25 February 7, 2006 QuoteDon't apologize. Throw her ass out or make sure her dad sends you the rent money directly. She's obviously too much of a child to do it on her own. Dude get the money from her dad FIRST and then throw her out. Gunnery Sergeant of Marines "I would like it if I were challenged mentally at my job and not feel like I'm mentally challenged." - Co-worker Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
