regulator 0 #1 March 18, 2010 http://news.bbc.co.uk/2/hi/uk_news/scotland/north_east/8570398.stm The court heard Marium Varinauskas had been drinking heavily A man who assaulted a female police officer with his penis has been fined. Marium Varinauskas, 28, tried to strike the officer on the head with his penis when she was called out to his flat, but she got out of the way. Lithuanian Varinauskas admitted a charge of assault at Aberdeen Sheriff Court and was fined £600. The court heard he had been drinking heavily and could not remember committing the offence at his home in Aberdeen. Police were called to his home by his girlfriend, who had complained about him being drunk last November. They arrived to find the self-employed engineer sitting on the sofa wearing a pair of underpants. He apologises profusely and is extremely embarrassed John Hardie Defence solicitor Fiscal depute Elaine Lynch said: "The accused got to his feet and was standing over the police officer exposing his penis and thrusting it in her face, forcing her to take evasive action to avoid getting struck." Defence solicitor John Hardie said: "He was sitting on the couch drunk with his pants on. "He can't remember anything but accepts that if that's what the police say then that's what happened. "He has never been so drunk before that day and accepts he has to take full responsibility. He apologises profusely and is extremely embarrassed." His not guilty plea to committing a breach of the peace by uttering offensive and sexual remarks was accepted by the Crown. Sheriff Annella Cowan was told that the Lithuanian had now quit binge drinking because of the incident. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
dreaming13000 1 #2 March 18, 2010 sounds like a good reason to quit binge drinking to me "A man only gets in life what he is believing for, nothing more and nothing less" Kenneth Hagen Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
piisfish 135 #3 March 18, 2010 she should have tazed him scissors beat paper, paper beat rock, rock beat wingsuit - KarlM Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nataly 38 #4 March 18, 2010 Oh my gosh.. There *must* be more to the story.. Police were called because the man was drunk in his own home?? Sound to me like the police have too much time on their hands.. Being almost hit by a knob doesn't strike me as being an accurate description of "assault".. It just sounds like a very, very stupid thing a drunk person does.. And honestly, if he was in his own home.. Well.. Whose business is it anyway that he was plastered?? Doesn't make sense to me.. Poor, silly, drunken man.. "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Scratch 0 #5 March 18, 2010 Quote she should have tazed him aaaaaaaargh. You made me squirm in my seat Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
blkhwk91b 0 #6 March 18, 2010 Quote Marium Varinauskas, 28, tried to strike the officer on the head with his penis when she was called out to his flat, but she got out of the way. Really??? She got out of the way??? Was it some scene from a cheap B flick, all in slow motion, with the slooow animalistic groans as parts swung through the air??? Quality reporting "Better to have a short life that is full of what you like doing, than a long life spent in a miserable way." - Alan Watts Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
regulator 0 #7 March 18, 2010 Being almost hit by a knob doesn't strike me as being an accurate description of "assault" ---------------------------------------------------------------- What if the 'knob' in question was spewing various liquids at the time of the assault? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
regulator 0 #8 March 18, 2010 Oh my god I just had a flashback from the Bruno movie...I think my poor mind will be tainted forever because of this. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
piisfish 135 #9 March 18, 2010 Repost Police, freeze and drop that ... weapon...scissors beat paper, paper beat rock, rock beat wingsuit - KarlM Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nataly 38 #10 March 18, 2010 Quote Being almost hit by a knob doesn't strike me as being an accurate description of "assault" ---------------------------------------------------------------- What if the 'knob' in question was spewing various liquids at the time of the assault? Hmm.. Well.. If he got her in the eye it might be assault, but I've always thought the drunker the man, the worst the aim!! "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
AggieDave 6 #11 March 18, 2010 What a prick! Ok, had to be said. --"When I die, may I be surrounded by scattered chrome and burning gasoline." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kallend 1,623 #12 March 19, 2010 To add a little class to the thread: www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=can-you-really-break-your www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=secrets-of-the-phallus... The only sure way to survive a canopy collision is not to have one. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Nataly 38 #13 March 19, 2010 Quote To add a little class to the thread: www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=can-you-really-break-your www.scientificamerican.com/article.cfm?id=secrets-of-the-phallus Quote How exactly does penile fracture happen? Any situation during intercourse when there is thrusting and when the penis, instead of penetrating its normal location, is hitting some solid structure (such as the perineum). Usually this occurs during regular vaginal sex with the woman on top, but it can happen in the missionary position or during sexual acrobatics. We had this patient who suffered penile fracture after running across the room and trying to penetrate his wife with a flying leap. Priceless!!! I bet people who work in the ER see some pretty crazy shit!!! "There is no problem so bad you can't make it worse." - Chris Hadfield « Sors le martinet et flagelle toi indigne contrôleuse de gestion. » - my boss Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
headoverheels 291 #14 April 9, 2010 Just another case of "assault with a friendly weapon." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
frappehatter 0 #15 April 10, 2010 u sure it wasnt assault with a dead weapon?? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
crazycableguy 0 #16 April 10, 2010 the USA is so fucked up! over here he would be listed as a sex offender for life, as opposed as a drunken idiot. heavy fine sounds good to me as long as he dosent become a repeat offender. besides who has not tried to "cock slap" someone when they were drunk, I know Im guilty. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
