beezyshaw

I think a thread like this came up before, but I laugh still whenever I think about this. I went to prep school (Baylor) with a guy named... "Happy Dicks" After graduation he went on to play football at Georgia. "He's down to the 30, the 20, the 10, and it's a touchdown! Georgia's on the scoreboard with Happy Dicks!"

I'd like to hear what this guy was saying... http://www.hiperusa.com/Ultralight_Flying.wmv

I'll forgive you for being a smart ass since it's your birthday.

Only in America...

Yea, kinda old news. My junk box gets about 10 "hello" paperclips a day for the last two years!

Nobody mentioned a really good book with a movie that was EXACTLY like the book... Christine, it was excellent.

Of course I won't laugh," the doctor said. "I'm a professional. In over twenty years I've never laughed at a patient." "Okay then," Joel said, and proceeded to drop his trousers, revealing the tiniest penis the doctor had ever seen. It couldn't have been the size of a peanut. Unable to control himself, the doctor started giggling, then fell laughing to the floor. Ten minutes later he was able to struggle to his feet and regain his composure. "I'm so sorry, "Said the doctor. "I really am..... I don't know what came over me. On my honor as a doctor and a gentleman, I promise it won't happen again. Now, what seems to be the problem?" "It's swollen," Joel replied. edited to use better name

Hey, get some bottle rockets and take 'em to the dz! Looks like a stupid skydiver trick to me http://www.hiperusa.com/buttrocket.wmv

Hey Tony, came across this thread from a year and a half ago, and thought I'd get some of your impressions now that you've had your Nitro for a while now. You were critisized for going to the Nitro 135 when you did by DrewEckhardt and to some degree by PhreeZone. Tell us if you've had any situations that either (1) make you glad you made the choice you did, or (2) make you wish you'd chosen a 150 instead. Also, to PhreeZone, you wrote your comments in this thread before jumping a Nitro. After jumping the 120 you demo'd, do you now feel any differently than your opinions back in Aug. '04?

Forgot to say... "Funeral arrangements to be announced"

A husband was in big trouble when he forgot his wedding anniversary. His wife told him "Tomorrow there better be something in the driveway for me that goes zero to 200 in 2 seconds flat." The next morning the wife found a small package in the driveway. She opened it and found a brand new bathroom scale.

A woman's husband had been slipping in and out of a coma for several months, yet she had stayed by his bedside every single day. One day, he motioned for her to come nearer. As she sat by him, he whispered, eyes full of tears, "You know what? You have been with me all through the bad times. When I got fired, you were there to support me. When my business failed, you were there. When I got shot, you were by my side. When we lost the house, you stayed right here. When my health started failing, you were still by my side.........You know what?" What dear?" she gently asked, smiling as her heart began to fill with warmth. I think you're bad luck, get the fuck away from me.

Yep, make sure he remembers Mujibar's answer, I think all applicants get that same question for their final exam!

Mujibar was trying to get into the USA legally through Immigration. The Officer said, "Mujibar, you have passed all the tests, except there is one more test. Unless you pass it, you cannot enter the United States of America." Mujibar said, "I am ready." The officer said, "Make a sentence using the words Yellow, Pink and Green." Mujibar thought for a few minutes and said, "Mister Officer, I am ready." The Officer said, "Go ahead." Mujibar said, "The telephone goes green, green, green, and I pink it up, and say, 'Yellow, this is Mujibar.'" Mujibar now lives in a neighborhood near you and works at a Verizon Help desk. I talked to him yesterday.

Yes, as a matter of fact, if you'll remember I talked to you and AE before Halloween, so where is it ? ps I'm serious edit: 120

psst....hey dom, looks like a lot of lumps and bumps along the upper surface of that canopy

How about the "AusSouls" ? edit to add... or the "Flying AusSouls" ? Hey, AusSoul! Hey, WHAT!

cool shots Bill. I especially like the opening shot*** Uh, me too ps Hey Bill, if you've got any more under canopy I'd really like to see them. Hell, I might make you famous (or would that be "more" famous?)

A first grade teacher had twenty-four students in her class and she presented each child the first half of a well-known proverb and asked them to come up with the remainder of the proverb. Their insight may surprise you. While reading these keep in mind that these are first graders, six-year olds. 1. Don't change horses ......... until they stop running. 2. Strike while the ......... bug is close. 3. It's always darkest before ......... Daylight Saving Time 4. Never underestimate the power of ......... termites. 5. You can lead a horse to water but ......... how? 6. Don't bite the hand that ......... looks dirty. 7. No news is ......... impossible. 8. A miss is as good as a ......... Mr. 9. You can't teach an old dog new ......... math. 10. If you lie down with dogs, you'll ......... stink in the morning. 11. Love all, trust ......... me. 12. The pen is mightier than the ......... pigs. 13. An idle mind is ......... the best way to relax. 14. Where there's smoke there's ......... pollution. 15. Happy is the bride who ......... gets all the presents. 16. A penny saved is ......... not much. 17. Two's company, three's ......... the Musketeers. 18. Don't put off till tomorrow what ......... you put on to go to bed. 19. Laugh and the world laughs with you, cry and ......... you have to blow your nose. 20. There are none so blind as ......... Stevie Wonder. 21. Children should be seen and not ......... spanked or grounded. 22. If at first you don't succeed ......... get new batteries. 23. You get out of something only what you ......... see in the picture on the box. 24. When the blind lead the blind ......... get out of the way!

Uh, you said "floater". Amphib, floater, uh, that was a good one. Uh, nevermind

You know, nowdays when people even DO answer to their name, they still don't get it quite right. The correct answer is not "what", but... "HEY WHAT!"

I'm sure it'll be handy. Let's see, Katie puts your ass in the garage for the night, you barf like a high schooler, then your friends hose it out for you...perfect set up!

The year is 2222 and after accumulating enough frequent flier miles, Mike and Maureen land on Mars. They meet a Martian couple and are talking about all sorts of things. Mike asks if Mars has a stock market, if they have laptop computers, how they make money, etc. Finally, Maureen brings up the subject of sex. "Just how do you guys do it?" asks Maureen. " Pretty much the same way as on Earth," responds the Martian. Discussion ensues and finally the couples decide to swap partners for the night and experience one another. Maureen and the male Martian go off to a bedroom where the Martian strips. He's has a teeny, weenie member - about half an inch long and just a quarter inch thick. "I don't think this is going to work," says Maureen. "Why?" he asks, "What's the matter?" "Well," she replies, "It's just not long enough to reach inside me!" "No problem," he says, and proceeds to slap his forehead with his palm. With each slap of his forehead, his member grows until it's quite impressively long. "Well," she says, "That's quite impressive, but it looks like a long pencil, it's very narrow...." "No problem," he says, and starts pulling his ears. With each pull, his member grows wider and wider until the entire measurement is extremely exciting to Maureen. "Wow!" she exclaims, as they fall into bed and make mad, passionate love. The next day the couples rejoin their normal partners and go their separate ways. As they walk along, Mike asks, "Well, was it any good for you?" "I hate to say it," says Maureen, "but it was damn good. How about you?" "It was horrible," he replies. "All I got was a headache. She kept slapping my forehead and pulling my ears."

Go big or go home...

Would it be ok to do a jello shot with lunch? Have a good day, bro.