Deuce 1 #1 November 20, 2002 My new rig is due to be delivered to my office TODAY! WHEN DAMMIT! Tracking shows it's still in Oakland. It's almost noon. I'm not gonna get anything done until it's here. MOVE IT you brown-truck-drivin, shorts-in-the-winter-wearin, cardboard-box-dust-in-your-teeth-suckin, can-you-spell-that-askin, not-more-than-seventy-pound-deliverin MAGGOTS! I NEED MY NEW RIG NOW SO I CAN STARE AT IT UNTIL THE FOG CLEARS ON SATURDAY! ARGH! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflir29 0 #2 November 20, 2002 Deep breath....count to ten.......take a valium. It's gonna be OK. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Deuce 1 #3 November 20, 2002 I wanna try Xanax. I saw a skydiva take some at a DZ that shall remain nameless and it appeared to, uh, relax her very effectively. I need some confrontation. Not any silly e-confrontation either. I want to destroy a defense attorney again. Where's my frickin rig........ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflyz 0 #4 November 20, 2002 I think your rig is in a brown box in a brown truck! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
eharris 0 #5 November 20, 2002 Quote My new rig is due to be delivered to my office TODAY! WHEN DAMMIT! Tracking shows it's still in Oakland. It's almost noon. I'm not gonna get anything done until it's here. MOVE IT you brown-truck-drivin, shorts-in-the-winter-wearin, cardboard-box-dust-in-your-teeth-suckin, can-you-spell-that-askin, not-more-than-seventy-pound-deliverin MAGGOTS! I NEED MY NEW RIG NOW SO I CAN STARE AT IT UNTIL THE FOG CLEARS ON SATURDAY! ARGH! You're getting greedy, Deuce! Geez, what's that the third damn rig? Settle down...you're making us all sick!M Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skybytch 259 #6 November 20, 2002 Dude! Didn't you hear? There was a major incident involving brown package delivery vans in Oakland. No injuries or deaths, but every brown package delivery van in the entire Bay area has been effectively grounded until they can figure out which muffler bearing caused the van with your rig on it to explode. Sorry to be the bearer of bad news. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wlie 0 #7 November 20, 2002 Quote muffler bearing Shhh... Your blowing the surprise he'll get when he opens the package and finds out it's filled with anus beads.My other ride is the relative wind. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflir29 0 #8 November 20, 2002 Quote but every brown package delivery van in the entire Bay area has been effectively grounded No....it's because since Deuce told me I went and knocked the ENTIRE UPS network down. They can't ship any packages whithout that so........... Who said working in Telecom was boring? It's sorta like being God sometimes. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lummy 4 #9 November 20, 2002 Dude.... It's still in Oakland? you work in Martinez, right?I wouldn't count on it today then.. it should be in Concord where the deliveries go out from. Oakland is a distribution hub.. Sorry :( Then again, I work in Oakland, I can go down n bitch n scream for a little if ya like....I promise not to TP Davis under canopy.. I promise not to TP Davis under canopy.. eat sushi, get smoochieTTK#1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Muenkel 0 #10 November 20, 2002 Quote Sorry to be the bearer of bad news. You're such a bytch!Actually Deuce, you haven't been listening to the news. A report is out that the government has learned that Al Qaeda operatives have been using UPS to ship small pox around the country. All trucks have been detained for an indefinite period of time, until all packages can be completely scrutinized. Sorry buddy. _________________________________________ Chris Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Deuce 1 #11 November 20, 2002 Quote Dude.... It's still in Oakland? you work in Martinez, right?I wouldn't count on it today then.. it should be in Concord where the deliveries go out from. Oakland is a distribution hub.. Sorry :( Then again, I work in Oakland, I can go down n bitch n scream for a little if ya like.... I know! I worked at the UPS Oakland hub when I was an undergrad! I'm screwed! M: I NEED a second rig so I can do more free video jumps for DZ.commers!Bytch: Good golly you're MEAN. Be my buddie and LIE TO ME when I need it.Clay: Oh thanks. But since you crashed their computer-thingie, how you gonna get that special hand cleaner that gets all that lanolin off youARGHRRRRR! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Muenkel 0 #12 November 20, 2002 I have another theory: It could be all the skychics are banging the UPS guys and nothing is being delivered. Just a theory. _________________________________________ Chris Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skybytch 259 #13 November 20, 2002 Quote Be my buddie and LIE TO ME when I need it. Damn, Deuce. You're looking exceptionally good today. I think it's that tie. Did I tell you that ties make me all hot and bothered? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Sebazz1 2 #14 November 20, 2002 Dude you guys are not going to belive this!! I just had a rig delivered to me! Beautiful Wings container! I really like the colors! I think I will keep it. Isn't it cool when gifts like this just fall out of the sky Thank you thank you sky gods for my beautiful new rig.... You don't think it was intended for someone else do you? Naaaawwwww it couldn't have been Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Muenkel 0 #15 November 20, 2002 Seb, you really do suck. _________________________________________ Chris Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lummy 4 #16 November 20, 2002 Hey You're welcome Deu... I mean Seb... pssstttt.... just remember where ya got it from WINK WINKI promise not to TP Davis under canopy.. I promise not to TP Davis under canopy.. eat sushi, get smoochieTTK#1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Deuce 1 #17 November 20, 2002 Quote Quote Be my buddie and LIE TO ME when I need it. Damn, Deuce. You're looking exceptionally good today. I think it's that tie. Did I tell you that ties make me all hot and bothered? (It has to be a beleivable lie, dorkus) The guy that owns the video concession at my DZ, my weekend boss, saw me picking up my kids in my coat and tie and he laughed so hard he couldn't even talk to me. AND SEBASTIAN I guess the red "JP" embroidered on the flap stands for "Jerky-Pooh" or something, huh?I'm checking E-bay....... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lummy 4 #18 November 20, 2002 QuoteAND SEBASTIAN I guess the red "JP" embroidered on the flap stands for "Jerky-Pooh" or something, huh JP= Just (A) Phish...I promise not to TP Davis under canopy.. I promise not to TP Davis under canopy.. eat sushi, get smoochieTTK#1 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Deuce 1 #19 November 20, 2002 AHHH! IT's SO COOL! Nothing like watching the boss knock down the mail clerk to get at the Box From Florida! Pretty pretty! Small too! (See size isn't everything!) Pictures soon! La la la! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
KawiZX900 0 #20 November 20, 2002 it'll probably get shuffled to will call if you r not there to sign, then you'll have to go pick it up at their office, within a week or they will send it back to the point of sale...... cheers mate .! Accelerate hard to get them looking, then slam on the fronts and rollright beside the car, hanging the back wheel at eye level for a few seconds. Guaranteed reaction- Dave Sonsky Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflir29 0 #21 November 20, 2002 Quote Nothing like watching the boss knock down the mail clerk to get at the Box From Florida! Pretty pretty! Small too! Calm down....you don't want to stain it up before you even jump it!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Deuce 1 #22 November 20, 2002 It was in a sealed clear plastic bag! It's OK! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
skybytch 259 #23 November 20, 2002 QuoteSmall too! (See size isn't everything!) Research has shown there is a direct correlation between rig size and penis size. Smaller the rig, smaller the penis. I'm not making this shit up either. I swear I'm not. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
freeflir29 0 #24 November 20, 2002 Quote Smaller the rig, smaller the penis. Danm....I must be hung like a horse jumping a Stilletto 170 in a Dolphin D2. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Deuce 1 #25 November 20, 2002 Well. The reserve is 18.75% smaller and the main is 11.75% smaller. I should be an average of 15.25% smaller. Hmmm. I'm quilted for comfort now, so how does that fit in to your equation. I'm going to send you a picture of me in wearing both my tie AND my glasses! (bytch) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
