Acensky 0 #1 October 8, 2006 WARNING: Holy CRAP this is funny. MUST HAVE GOOD SENSE OF HUMOR to continue. If your up-tight, goody-tu-shoes or a plain old party pooper, do NOT continue. Otherwise...enjoy.... 1.Beer is always wet. Vagina needs a little work. One point to BEER 2.Warm beer tastes awful. One point to VAGINA 3.A really cold beer is satisfying. a cold vagina is still satisfying. don't believe me? try it in the snow. let's call this a DRAW 4.If after taking a swig of your favourite beer you find a hair between your teeth, you may vomit. One point to VAGINA 5. If you get home reeking of beer your wife may get mad, make a scene, kick you out, etc. If you get home reeking of vagina your wife may get mad, kick you out, even leave you. There's definitely a point to be had here, depending on your point of view and personal circumstances. I'll just call it a DRAW for the time being. 6. Ten beers in one night and you can't drive home. Ten vaginas in one night and you don't want to drive anywhere. One point to VAGINA 7. If you have a lot of beer in a public place, your reputation may suffer. If you eat any vagina in public, you become a legend. One point to VAGINA 8. If a cop stops you and you smell of beer you may get arrested. If you smell of vagina he may buy you a beer. One point to VAGINA 9. You normally don't find old beer. One point to BEER 10. Too much beer and you'll think you see flying saucers. Too much vagina and you'll think you've seen God. One point to VAGINA 11. Ripping off a beer bottle label is boring. Ripping off panties is fun. One point to VAGINA 12. In most countries there's a tax on beer. One point to VAGINA 13. If you have another beer the first one never gets pissed off. One point to BEER 14. You can always be sure if you're the first one to open a bottle or a can. One point to BEER 15. If you shake beer it'll get all agitated but eventually it settles down. One point to BEER 16. With beer you always have choice: clear, dark, pilsner,ale,lager,etc.... with vagina, you also have a choice....white, black, brown yellow, white, shaved, bushy, large, small, wet, or dry. so a DRAW 17. You always know how much beer is going to cost One point to BEER 18. Beer doesn't have a mother One point to BEER 19. Beer never expects to be hugged for half an hour after you drink it. you may be hugging the toilet half an hour after drinking beer. so a DRAW 20. Tapping a Keg... easy. Tapping a Vagina... may take you weeks. One Point to BEER Final Score 11 BEER/ 11 VAGINA That's it! The matter is settled, the clear winner is: NEITHER PS: If you are a woman and at this point feel angry, degraded or discriminated against, just remember that Beer would experience none of those feelings, let alone express them, an extra point for BEER. i guess that makes BEER the winner! HeatherGarbage bags do not make good parachutes. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SmilingPhoenix 0 #3 October 8, 2006 21. If a man has to go through life without beer, there's always liquor or other non-governmentally approved substances depending on your kink. If you don't mind going through life without what I have, you are either gay or dead. 20 points me ! Because life is an adventure - it may not be the one you planned, but then it wouldn't be an adventure! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shropshire 0 #4 October 8, 2006 Both Pussy & Bud are close to piss (.)Y(.) Chivalry is not dead; it only sleeps for want of work to do. - Jerome K Jerome Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Andy9o8 0 #5 October 9, 2006 QuoteBoth Pussy & Bud are close to piss OMFG, that's not funny, that's TRUE. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SlyFox 0 #6 October 9, 2006 Fifteen beers in one night and you might not remember what happen that night. Fifteen vaginas in one night and you will never forget that night. *****Why would anyone jump from a perfectly good airplane? Because it isn't much fun if it's broke.**** Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shropshire 0 #7 October 9, 2006 Nor will your mates... cuz you'll tell them enough times. (.)Y(.) Chivalry is not dead; it only sleeps for want of work to do. - Jerome K Jerome Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 212 #9 October 9, 2006 QuoteHell yeah! I'm going to go with "Hell Yeah" as well on this one.I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #10 October 9, 2006 QuoteNor will your mates... cuz you'll tell them enough times. "Father, last night I slept with 15 women." "How long has it been since your last confession?" "I've never been to confession. I'm Jewish." "Then why are you telling me?" "Crap. I'm tellin' everybody." Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
SlyFox 0 #11 October 9, 2006 LOL *****Why would anyone jump from a perfectly good airplane? Because it isn't much fun if it's broke.**** Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
shropshire 0 #12 October 9, 2006 Father.. I have to confess, I've been sleeping with married women whilst their husbands are on night shift.. Was it Mrs Smith, from the High Street? No Father Was it Mrs Jones from the cottages? No Father Mrs Brown from over York way? No Father.... but thanks for the leads anyway (.)Y(.) Chivalry is not dead; it only sleeps for want of work to do. - Jerome K Jerome Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
lawrocket 3 #13 October 9, 2006 Quote The matter is settled, the clear winner is: NEITHER Tiebreaker: Yeast makes beer bearable. Yeast makes vaginas unbearable. Winner - BEER. My wife is hotter than your wife. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jonstark 8 #14 October 10, 2006 QuoteBoth Pussy & Bud are close to piss Yep... one slip of the tougue and you're in a world of sh!t. jon Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
bigway 4 #15 October 10, 2006 10. Too much beer and you'll think you see flying saucers. Too much vagina and you'll think you've seen God. One point to VAGINA I think BEER deserves this point. I would rather see flying saucers... and besides if i see God, that aint going to be a good thing! .Karnage Krew Gear Store . Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
