boinky 0 #1 October 24, 2006 This is for anyone who lives in Atlanta, Georgia, has ever lived in Atlanta, has ever visited Atlanta, ever plans to visit Atlanta, knows anyone who already lives in Atlanta, or knows anyone who has ever heard of Atlanta. 1. Atlanta is composed mostly of one-way streets. The only way to get out of downtown Atlanta is to turn around and start over when you reach Greenville, South Carolina. 2. All directions start with, "Go down Peachtree" and include the phrase, "When you see the Waffle House." Except that where all directions begin with, "Go to the Big Chicken." 3. Peachtree Street has no beginning and no end and is not to be confused with: Peachtree Circle Peachtree Place Peachtree Lane Peachtree Road Peachtree Parkway Peachtree Run Peachtree Terrace Peachtree Avenue Peachtree Commons Peachtree Battle Peachtree Corners New Peachtree Old Peachtree West Peachtree Peachtree-Dunwoody Peachtree-Chamblee Peachtree Industrial Boulevard 4. Atlantans only know their way to work and their way home. If you ask anyone for directions, they will always send you down Peachtree. 5. Atlanta is the home of Coca-Cola. Coke's all they drink there, so don't ask for any other soft drink unless it's made by Coca-Cola. 6. The gates at Atlanta's Hartsfield International Airport are about 32 miles away from the Main Concourse, so wear sneakers and pack a lunch. 7. The 8am rush hour is from 6:00 to 10:30 AM. The 5pm rush hour is from 2:30 to 7:30 PM. Friday's rush hour starts Thursday afternoon and lasts through 2am Saturday. 8. Only a native can pronounce Ponce De Leon Avenue, so do not attempt the Spanish pronunciation. People will simply tilt their heads to the right and stare at you. The Atlanta pronunciation is "pawntz duh LEE-awn." And yes, they have a street named simply,"Boulevard." 9. The falling of one raindrop causes all drivers to immediately forget all traffic rules. 10. If a single snowflake falls, the city is paralyzed for three days and it's on all the channels as a news flash every 15 minutes for a week. Overnight, all grocery stores will be sold out of milk, bread, bottled water, toilet paper, and beer. 11. I-285, the loop that encircles Atlanta, which has a posted speed limit of 55 mph (but you have to maintain 80 mph just to keep from getting run over), is known to truckers as "The Watermelon 500." 12. Don't believe the directional markers on highways: I-285 is marked"East" and "West" but you may be going North or South. The locals identify the direction by referring to the "Inner Loop" and the "Outer Loop." 13. If you travel on Hwy 92 North, you will actually be going southeast. 14. Never buy a ladder or mattress in Atlanta. Just go to one of the interstates, and you will soon find one in the middle of the road. 15. The last thing you want to do is give another driver the finger, unless your car is armored, your trigger finger is itchy, and your AK-47 has a full clip. 16. Possums sleep in the middle of the road with their feet in the air. 17. There are 5,000 types of snakes and 4,998 live in Georgia. 18. There are 10,000 types of spiders. All 10,000 live in Georgia, plus a couple no one has seen before. 19. If it grows, it sticks. 20. If it crawls, it bites. 21. If you notice a vine trying to wrap itself around your leg, you have about 20 seconds to escape, before you are completely captured and covered with Kudzu, another ill-advised "import," like the carp, starling, English sparrow, and other "exotic wonders. 13. "It's not a shopping cart, it's a buggy. 14. "Fixinto" is one word (I'm fixinto go to the store). 15. Sweet Tea is appropriate for all meals and you start drinking it when you're 2 years old. 16. "Jeet?" is actually a phrase meaning "Did you eat" 17. "Momma-nem" means: how's Mother and all of the other children and other members of the family doing.Nina Are we called "DAWGs" because we stick our noses up people's butts? (RIP Buzz) Yep, you're a postwhore-billyvance Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
yardhippie 0 #2 October 24, 2006 You are hereby fined by the repost police. You must now do you civic duty and post pictures of boobies. No, not the bird one, we've seen that too. Seeing as how this is your second offense today, you must post TWO separate pictures of boobies, notice I used a plural now, so NO, two pictures of one boob each will not suffice. We are here for your protection.Goddam dirty hippies piss me off! ~GFD "What do I get for closing your rig?" ~ me "Anything you want." ~ female skydiver Mohoso Rodriguez #865 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
boinky 0 #3 October 24, 2006 Sigh....damned repost police! Sorry....no boobie pics. I'll delete the post instead, if you'd like! Nina Are we called "DAWGs" because we stick our noses up people's butts? (RIP Buzz) Yep, you're a postwhore-billyvance Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
yardhippie 0 #4 October 24, 2006 QuoteSigh....damned repost police! Sorry....no boobie pics. I'll delete the post instead, if you'd like! Now, I didnt say that had to be YOUR boobies! Please read the fine print! Goddam dirty hippies piss me off! ~GFD "What do I get for closing your rig?" ~ me "Anything you want." ~ female skydiver Mohoso Rodriguez #865 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Samurai136 0 #5 October 24, 2006 QuoteYou are hereby fined by the repost police. You must now do you civic duty and post pictures of boobies. No, not the bird one, we've seen that too. Seeing as how this is your second offense today, you must post TWO separate pictures of boobies, notice I used a plural now, so NO, two pictures of one boob each will not suffice. We are here for your protection. *ahem* Please reference the Rules. Hippy, you're in the penalty box."Buttons aren't toys." - Trillian Ken Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
RkyMtnHigh 0 #6 October 24, 2006 It's okay for Nina to repost since I don't recall seeing it before now..or just didn't care at the time. Now that I'm in the area: * I get called "baby, honey, and sugar" by the cashiers at the grocery store; * If I stand still too long, someone asks if they can help me find something; * I'm overwhelmed by how friendly people are here; * Someone handed me a laminated map of the city and said "Welcome to Atlanta" and I thought I was getting carjacked; * I finally know what people mean when they ask me if I live/work "OTP or ITP"; * Getting used to being asked "sweet or unsweet" when I order Iced Tea; * Everyone says that my destination is "only 15-20 minutes away"; * East, West, North, South is very confusing. * Last but not least, the local jumpers are WAY COOL! _________________________________________ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
panzwami 0 #7 October 24, 2006 I saw a bumper sticker the other day that said 'Keep the -ANTA in ATLANTA.' I guess 'da ATL' is the new hotness... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
happythoughts 0 #8 October 25, 2006 QuoteI saw a bumper sticker the other day that said 'Keep the -ANTA in ATLANTA.' I guess 'da ATL' is the new hotness... Not new. It will be on your luggage. If you are flying through the South and your plane crashes, before you go to Hell, you still have to change planes in Atlanta. (And the connecting flight is on a different concourse ) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
boinky 0 #9 October 25, 2006 QuoteIt's okay for Nina to repost since I don't recall seeing it before now..or just didn't care at the time. Thanks for your support, Katee! Nina Are we called "DAWGs" because we stick our noses up people's butts? (RIP Buzz) Yep, you're a postwhore-billyvance Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kelel01 1 #10 October 25, 2006 I <3 Katee! And btw, I love that post, Nina. Don't care if it's a repost if not. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites RkyMtnHigh 0 #11 October 25, 2006 QuoteI <3 Katee! And btw, I love that post, Nina. Don't care if it's a repost if not. Sorry I couldnt come to Trivia tonight...promise to make it up to yáll...did ya win tonight? _________________________________________ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites kelel01 1 #12 October 25, 2006 Hell, no. We were in first going into the final round, which is basically the kiss of death. Oh, well. We shall prevail! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites NWFlyer 2 #13 October 25, 2006 QuoteHell, no. We were in first going into the final round, which is basically the kiss of death. Oh, well. We shall prevail! I got a semi-DD from the Hippie on his way home. Something about "you need to move to Atlanta where all the cool kids are." Have you won since I left? "There is only one basic human right, the right to do as you damn well please. And with it comes the only basic human duty, the duty to take the consequences." -P.J. O'Rourke Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites boinky 0 #14 October 25, 2006 QuoteAnd btw, I love that post, Nina. Don't care if it's a repost if not. Gee....I feel so loved! Nina Are we called "DAWGs" because we stick our noses up people's butts? (RIP Buzz) Yep, you're a postwhore-billyvance Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites 2fat2fly 0 #15 October 25, 2006 Quote* Last but not least, the local jumpers are WAY COOL! Actually not, it the random jumpers that pass through Atlanta that leave coolness in their wake-the local jumpers are quite stodgy and repressed without that influenceI am not the man. But the man knows my name...and he's worried Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites NWFlyer 2 #16 October 25, 2006 QuoteActually not, it the random jumpers that pass through Atlanta that leave coolness in their wake-the local jumpers are quite stodgy and repressed without that influence I *totally* agree. "There is only one basic human right, the right to do as you damn well please. And with it comes the only basic human duty, the duty to take the consequences." -P.J. O'Rourke Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites yardhippie 0 #17 October 25, 2006 QuoteQuoteHell, no. We were in first going into the final round, which is basically the kiss of death. Oh, well. We shall prevail! I got a semi-DD from the Hippie on his way home. Something about "you need to move to Atlanta where all the cool kids are." Have you won since I left? mmmm... beer. My head hurts this morning. All I gotta say is: 'ATL' its the way it is. The airport aint that bad for the busiest airport in North America, and Id still rather change planes there than DFW, Ohare, Dulles, or Cincinatti! We have MULTIPLE Crown rooms! Oh, and if ya dont like it, come get me! I'll be waiting for you on peachtree! Goddam dirty hippies piss me off! ~GFD "What do I get for closing your rig?" ~ me "Anything you want." ~ female skydiver Mohoso Rodriguez #865 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites mnealtx 0 #18 October 25, 2006 "Crow room" ???Mike I love you, Shannon and Jim. POPS 9708 , SCR 14706 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites yardhippie 0 #19 October 25, 2006 Quote"Crow room" ??? Ok, ya got me. I can spell Atlanta, thats why I use ATL. and obviously I cant spell 'crown' either. Goddam dirty hippies piss me off! ~GFD "What do I get for closing your rig?" ~ me "Anything you want." ~ female skydiver Mohoso Rodriguez #865 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites mnealtx 0 #20 October 25, 2006 Ah, ok... I couldnt' figure out what the hell you were talking about...Mike I love you, Shannon and Jim. POPS 9708 , SCR 14706 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites yardhippie 0 #21 October 25, 2006 QuoteAh, ok... I couldnt' figure out what the hell you were talking about... No worries. Neither can most of the people I talk to! Goddam dirty hippies piss me off! ~GFD "What do I get for closing your rig?" ~ me "Anything you want." ~ female skydiver Mohoso Rodriguez #865 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites kelel01 1 #22 October 25, 2006 At least you didn't go home and drink a bottle of wine, too. My alarm went off at 10 am, and I thought it was 6. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites yardhippie 0 #23 October 25, 2006 QuoteAt least you didn't go home and drink a bottle of wine, too. My alarm went off at 10 am, and I thought it was 6. I couldnt have I was plenty hammered when I left. Goddam dirty hippies piss me off! ~GFD "What do I get for closing your rig?" ~ me "Anything you want." ~ female skydiver Mohoso Rodriguez #865 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Gawain 0 #24 October 25, 2006 Quote5. Atlanta is the home of Coca-Cola. Coke's all they drink there, so don't ask for any other soft drink unless it's made by Coca-Cola. It's even worse than that, even Sprite (made by Coca Cola) is referred to as Coke. Any softdrink is referred to as a "coke". Quote6. The gates at Atlanta's Hartsfield International Airport are about 32 miles away from the Main Concourse, so wear sneakers and pack a lunch. This is true. Quote7. The 8am rush hour is from 6:00 to 10:30 AM. The 5pm rush hour is from 2:30 to 7:30 PM. Friday's rush hour starts Thursday afternoon and lasts through 2am Saturday. With exception to the perimeter (I-285), where it is always rush hour with all relevant back-ups, with the occasional sprint at 100mph between traffic jams. So I try and I scream and I beg and I sigh Just to prove I'm alive, and it's alright 'Cause tonight there's a way I'll make light of my treacherous life Make light! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites mnealtx 0 #25 October 25, 2006 QuoteWith exception to the perimeter (I-285), where it is always rush hour with all relevant back-ups, with the occasional sprint at 100mph between traffic jams. Can you *get* up to 100 in 1/8 mile? Mike I love you, Shannon and Jim. POPS 9708 , SCR 14706 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites Prev 1 2 Next Page 1 of 2 Join the conversation You can post now and register later. If you have an account, sign in now to post with your account. 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RkyMtnHigh 0 #11 October 25, 2006 QuoteI <3 Katee! And btw, I love that post, Nina. Don't care if it's a repost if not. Sorry I couldnt come to Trivia tonight...promise to make it up to yáll...did ya win tonight? _________________________________________ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kelel01 1 #12 October 25, 2006 Hell, no. We were in first going into the final round, which is basically the kiss of death. Oh, well. We shall prevail! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NWFlyer 2 #13 October 25, 2006 QuoteHell, no. We were in first going into the final round, which is basically the kiss of death. Oh, well. We shall prevail! I got a semi-DD from the Hippie on his way home. Something about "you need to move to Atlanta where all the cool kids are." Have you won since I left? "There is only one basic human right, the right to do as you damn well please. And with it comes the only basic human duty, the duty to take the consequences." -P.J. O'Rourke Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
boinky 0 #14 October 25, 2006 QuoteAnd btw, I love that post, Nina. Don't care if it's a repost if not. Gee....I feel so loved! Nina Are we called "DAWGs" because we stick our noses up people's butts? (RIP Buzz) Yep, you're a postwhore-billyvance Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
2fat2fly 0 #15 October 25, 2006 Quote* Last but not least, the local jumpers are WAY COOL! Actually not, it the random jumpers that pass through Atlanta that leave coolness in their wake-the local jumpers are quite stodgy and repressed without that influenceI am not the man. But the man knows my name...and he's worried Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
NWFlyer 2 #16 October 25, 2006 QuoteActually not, it the random jumpers that pass through Atlanta that leave coolness in their wake-the local jumpers are quite stodgy and repressed without that influence I *totally* agree. "There is only one basic human right, the right to do as you damn well please. And with it comes the only basic human duty, the duty to take the consequences." -P.J. O'Rourke Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
yardhippie 0 #17 October 25, 2006 QuoteQuoteHell, no. We were in first going into the final round, which is basically the kiss of death. Oh, well. We shall prevail! I got a semi-DD from the Hippie on his way home. Something about "you need to move to Atlanta where all the cool kids are." Have you won since I left? mmmm... beer. My head hurts this morning. All I gotta say is: 'ATL' its the way it is. The airport aint that bad for the busiest airport in North America, and Id still rather change planes there than DFW, Ohare, Dulles, or Cincinatti! We have MULTIPLE Crown rooms! Oh, and if ya dont like it, come get me! I'll be waiting for you on peachtree! Goddam dirty hippies piss me off! ~GFD "What do I get for closing your rig?" ~ me "Anything you want." ~ female skydiver Mohoso Rodriguez #865 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mnealtx 0 #18 October 25, 2006 "Crow room" ???Mike I love you, Shannon and Jim. POPS 9708 , SCR 14706 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
yardhippie 0 #19 October 25, 2006 Quote"Crow room" ??? Ok, ya got me. I can spell Atlanta, thats why I use ATL. and obviously I cant spell 'crown' either. Goddam dirty hippies piss me off! ~GFD "What do I get for closing your rig?" ~ me "Anything you want." ~ female skydiver Mohoso Rodriguez #865 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mnealtx 0 #20 October 25, 2006 Ah, ok... I couldnt' figure out what the hell you were talking about...Mike I love you, Shannon and Jim. POPS 9708 , SCR 14706 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
yardhippie 0 #21 October 25, 2006 QuoteAh, ok... I couldnt' figure out what the hell you were talking about... No worries. Neither can most of the people I talk to! Goddam dirty hippies piss me off! ~GFD "What do I get for closing your rig?" ~ me "Anything you want." ~ female skydiver Mohoso Rodriguez #865 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
kelel01 1 #22 October 25, 2006 At least you didn't go home and drink a bottle of wine, too. My alarm went off at 10 am, and I thought it was 6. Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
yardhippie 0 #23 October 25, 2006 QuoteAt least you didn't go home and drink a bottle of wine, too. My alarm went off at 10 am, and I thought it was 6. I couldnt have I was plenty hammered when I left. Goddam dirty hippies piss me off! ~GFD "What do I get for closing your rig?" ~ me "Anything you want." ~ female skydiver Mohoso Rodriguez #865 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Gawain 0 #24 October 25, 2006 Quote5. Atlanta is the home of Coca-Cola. Coke's all they drink there, so don't ask for any other soft drink unless it's made by Coca-Cola. It's even worse than that, even Sprite (made by Coca Cola) is referred to as Coke. Any softdrink is referred to as a "coke". Quote6. The gates at Atlanta's Hartsfield International Airport are about 32 miles away from the Main Concourse, so wear sneakers and pack a lunch. This is true. Quote7. The 8am rush hour is from 6:00 to 10:30 AM. The 5pm rush hour is from 2:30 to 7:30 PM. Friday's rush hour starts Thursday afternoon and lasts through 2am Saturday. With exception to the perimeter (I-285), where it is always rush hour with all relevant back-ups, with the occasional sprint at 100mph between traffic jams. So I try and I scream and I beg and I sigh Just to prove I'm alive, and it's alright 'Cause tonight there's a way I'll make light of my treacherous life Make light! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
mnealtx 0 #25 October 25, 2006 QuoteWith exception to the perimeter (I-285), where it is always rush hour with all relevant back-ups, with the occasional sprint at 100mph between traffic jams. Can you *get* up to 100 in 1/8 mile? Mike I love you, Shannon and Jim. POPS 9708 , SCR 14706 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
