aerohaga

Can anyone tell me how to contact this DZ? The phone number is not in service and never got an answer to my email to Larry. Thanks! For my part, I know nothing with any certainty, But the sight of the stars makes me dream. -Vincent Van Gogh

The IRS decides to audit Ralph, and summons him to the IRS office. The IRS auditor is not surprised when Ralph shows up with his attorney. The auditor says, "Well, sir, you have an extravagant lifestyle and no full-time employment, which you explain by saying that you win money gambling. I'm not sure the IRS finds that believable." "I'm a great gambler, and I can prove it," says Ralph. "How about a demonstration?" The auditor thinks for a moment and said, "Okay. Go ahead." Ralph says, "I'll bet you a thousand dollars that I can bite my own eye." The auditor thinks a moment and says, "No way! It's a bet." Ralph removes his glass eye and bites it. The auditor's jaw drops. Ralph says, "Now, I'll bet you two thousand dollars that I can bite my other eye." The auditor can tell Ralph isn't blind, so he takes the bet. Ralph removes his dentures and bites his good eye. The stunned auditor now realizes he has wagered and lost three grand, with Ralph's attorney as a witness. He starts to get nervous. "Want to go double or nothing?" Ralph asks. "I'll bet you six thousand dollars that I can stand on one side of your desk, and pee into that wastebasket on the other side, and never get a drop anywhere in between." The auditor, twice burned, is cautious now, but he looks carefully and decides there's no way this guy can manage that stunt, so he agrees again. Ralph stands beside the desk and unzips his pants, but although he strains mightily, he can't make the stream reach the wastebasket on other side, so he pretty much urinates all over the desk. The auditor leaps with joy, realizing that he has just turned a major loss into a huge win. But Ralph's attorney moans and puts his head in his hands. "Are yo u okay?" the auditor asks. "Not really," says the attorney. "This morning, when Ralph told me he'd been summoned for an audit, he bet me twenty thousand dollars that he could come in here and piss all over an IRS official's desk and that you'd be happy about it." For my part, I know nothing with any certainty, But the sight of the stars makes me dream. -Vincent Van Gogh

I'm glad I read your post-my husband has been after me to get Direcway. I've been leery about shelling out the $800 plus monthly fees. I've got the slooooowwwwest dial-up imaginable (26,600 on a good day) but that's a lot of cash to lay out just so I can watch skydivingmovies.com! For my part, I know nothing with any certainty, But the sight of the stars makes me dream. -Vincent Van Gogh

My high school faves- Hotel California-Eagles Anything by Aerosmith 2112-Rush Dark Side Of The Moon-Pink Floyd For my part, I know nothing with any certainty, But the sight of the stars makes me dream. -Vincent Van Gogh

In every restaurant bathroom I've ever been in: "Employees must wash hands before returning to work" Do they really have to be reminded??? At my gym- "Please do not spit in fountain" Eewww!!! For my part, I know nothing with any certainty, But the sight of the stars makes me dream. -Vincent Van Gogh

How about when one (or more) of them pass out drunk, paint their toenails bright red. Or, get some bells and tie them to the underside of their beds-great fun if they have "friends" over. For my part, I know nothing with any certainty, But the sight of the stars makes me dream. -Vincent Van Gogh

1. Skydive again, even if it's another tandem 2. Start AFF training (if I can find somewhere close!) 3. Visit Ireland 4. See the Statue of Liberty For my part, I know nothing with any certainty, But the sight of the stars makes me dream. -Vincent Van Gogh

1. Skydive 2. Grand Canyon, Petrified Forest and Painted Desert 3. Pacific Ocean 4. Stood on a corner in Winslow, Arizona 5. Tiajuana, MX So far, so good! Only about a hundred more to go! For my part, I know nothing with any certainty, But the sight of the stars makes me dream. -Vincent Van Gogh

How about a pun? A well-known chef bought several cases of carp. Endeavoring to create a new signature dish, he tried combining herbs and spices with shortening but found that the cooking time had to be exact. So when the chef received a phone call during the dinner hour, he had to cut it short, explaining, "I left my carp in saffron Crisco." For my part, I know nothing with any certainty, But the sight of the stars makes me dream. -Vincent Van Gogh

Two antennas meet on a roof, fall in love and get married. The ceremony wasn't much, but the reception was excellent. Two hydrogen atoms walk into a bar. One says, "I've lost my electron." The other says, "Are you sure?" The first replies, "Yes, I'm positive." A jumper cable walks into a bar. The bartender says, "I'll serve you, but don't start anything." A sandwich walks into a bar. The bartender says, "Sorry we don't serve food in here." A dyslexic man walks into a bra. A man walks into a bar with a slab of asphalt under his arm and says, "A beer please, and one for the road." Two cannibals are eating a clown. One says to the other: "Does this taste funny to you?" Two cows standing next to each other in a field, Daisy says to Dolly, "I was artificially inseminated this morning." "I don't believe you," said Dolly. "It's true, no bull!" exclaimed Daisy. An invisible man marries an invisible woman. The kids were nothing to look at either. A man takes his Rottweiler to the vet and says, "My dog's cross-eyed, is there anything you can do for him?" "Well," says the vet, "let's have a look at him." So he picks the dog up and examines his eyes, then checks his teeth. Finally, he says, "I'm going to have to put him down." "What? Because he's cross-eyed?" "No, because he's really heavy." I went to buy some camouflage trousers the other day but I couldn't find any. What do you call a fish with no eyes? A fsh. For my part, I know nothing with any certainty, But the sight of the stars makes me dream. -Vincent Van Gogh

If it sticks and it's not supposed to---WD-40 If it doesn't stick and it's supposed to--Duct Tape For my part, I know nothing with any certainty, But the sight of the stars makes me dream. -Vincent Van Gogh

Let me see-Tiger hits a little ball around with a big-headed stick and walks around (sometimes rides a cart). Lance rides a bike for over 2200 miles for 21 days. No question-it's Tiger (kidding of course) For my part, I know nothing with any certainty, But the sight of the stars makes me dream. -Vincent Van Gogh

I know a guy that was on the show and won both showcases. Said the taxes ust about ate him up! For my part, I know nothing with any certainty, But the sight of the stars makes me dream. -Vincent Van Gogh

I was born at 4:45 a.m. and I am morning person only if I wake up at 11:59 a.m.! For my part, I know nothing with any certainty, But the sight of the stars makes me dream. -Vincent Van Gogh

No message is only slightly worse than the message that goes on and on and on and on........Can't you just say "Hi, this is (insert your name here). Call me when you get a chance"? For my part, I know nothing with any certainty, But the sight of the stars makes me dream. -Vincent Van Gogh