zclubber1

Well, I guess I can be a minister if I have only one follower. It could work. What was I thinking giving up so soon!!! -can't you trip like I do- Clubber

Bastard stole my idea!!! Now how am I going to finance my new utopian society and economy!! It doesn't matter anyway. My supposed fiance' Dar never even showed up to my tent. She was supposed to be my partner. Forget it, guess I'll just go back to my real job. Damn!! -can't you trip like I do- Clubber

Thanks for not blabbing that I was the moron that you followed downwind. Oh wait, I just ratted myself out. Damn!!!! -can't you trip like I do- Clubber

LOL!!!! What about Bob! I love that movie! "Look at me Dr. Marivin, I'm sailing!" "Yeah, I just picked it up today. The boat did most of the work though." "I've never been on vacation. I've never been anywhere." -can't you trip like I do- Clubber

Oh yeah, I almost forgot. It's all these different threads. I just can't keep my stories straight!

Of course it'll work. What's really great about expanding the business and hiring extra employees and maybe even opening some franchises, is that it will spur more people on to start similar businesses. Eventually, we'll create an entirely new economy that operates solely on jump tickets. No more cash, no more credit cards, no more bank accounts. One currency....jump tickets. I know it's a bit utopian, but it could be beautiful. As for your hubby, Dar, you have no worries. 5'11, 195lbs.(did you mean body weight or exit weight?), 28 years old, bright blue eyes, and a dream. We may both be altiholics, but after today, I don't think that's much of a problem. Let the co-dependant enabling begin!!

Isn't it amazing how quickly these threads mutate into something completely unrelated. It just cuts into my work time even more since I have to read every thread. Threads subjects are useless at this point.

Of course you'll help with the weddings. Why do you think the ceremony fee is TWO jump tickets! And don't worry about the never the bride thing. Our wedding will be the first I perform. Actually, are you allowed to marry yourself. I kind of like the sound of it. Reverand and Mrs. Clubber of the Southern Californian Skydivers' Ministry. I'll even let you decorate the tent any way you want. Everyone kept telling me that as soon as I could admit to myself that I was in fact an altiholic, everything else would fall into place and I could start rebulding my life again. Married, tax free, 2 new businesses, AND I still get to skydive!! Perfect! -can't you trip like I do- Clubber

Not as warm as LA. And tent city at Perris is the cadillac of tent cities. Dar could run the dating service, and I could marry the happy couples. Perfect. -can't you trip like I do- Clubber

I can't get a wife since I can't afford a wedding. All my money was spent on skydiving. That gives me an idea! Maybe I can start the Skydivers' Ministry. Tax exempt and cheap skydiver weddings right at the dz. I figure a couple of jump tickets should cover the ceremony. Hmmmm.....what was that "start your own ministry" URL, again? -can't you trip like I do- Clubber

Viking, , -can't you trip like I do- Clubber

Funny?!?!? I have a serious problem and I need help! I expected support from this group, not mocking laughter. -can't you trip like I do- Clubber

I don't think it's dumb at all. In fact, that's exactly what I would wish for. Every good dream I've ever had since I was 5 years old was of flying. That's why I love skydiving so much. At least I can pretend I flying. If only that damn altimeter would stop go lower all the time!

P.S. I stole the altiholics idea from BenW. Sorry, man. But at least I'm giving you credit here. -can't you trip like I do- Clubber

Hi, my name is Clubber, and I'm an altiholic. It all started with my childhood dreams of flying. I knew about skydiving, but I had never tried it. Then one day a friend of mine talked me into trying a skydive just once. He said things like, "One jump won't hurt you." and "You can walk away at any time." Well, as we all know, one is never enough and 2 is too many. I guess it started off OK. It was the standard AFF deal. I figured I would do a level or 2 each month, you know, just to stay current. 2 levels a month turned out to be 2 levels per day. But I had it under control. "Only jump on the weekends and I'll be alright". Well, one day per weekend turned into all weekend. Still, I was sure I didn't have a problem. I thought, "I'll just sleep in the tent. As long as I make home by Sunday night, I can make it to work on Monday, and I'll be alright." Soon after that, I graduate from the AFF to solo's. I was convinced that even though it was a better high, I still had it "under control". I wasn't gonna turn out like everyone else. I was different. I was stronger. I guess was a functioning addict at the time. Still paying rent, still going to work. So what if I push the phone bill back a little. It's not like they're threatening to turn it off. Besides, jumps are only $18 now. Yeah, right, $18. But now, instead of saving money, I just started jumping more. And more and more. I wish I could have seen myself like other people saw me, hair all blown out, film of dirt covering my face, slapping down my credit card for everything from jump tickets to gear rentals. "Oh yeah, put a rush on that jumpsuit order. I'll pay the extra $40. I gotta have it!" I didn't even know who I was anymore. And forget about looking at myself in the mirror. That just didn't happen anymore. Let me fast forward a little. I know you all want have another cigarette and get a fill-up on your coffee and this meetings only a hour. It wasn't long before I started ducking out of work early to make a couple loads before sunset. I never thought they would fire me. They said something about job abandonment. No big deal. I didn't want to be there anyway. Now I had more time to jump! Great, right? Yeah, well, sure enough, the first of the month rolls around, and I didn't have the rent. What little money I had left was now gone and with no income, bills just weren't an option. I wasn't even home when the sheriff threw my shit in the street. I was at....that's right, the dropzone. When I finally dragged my filthy, dirty, sweaty, tired ass back home, I realized I had nowhere to even store my things until I got back on my feet. My whuffo friends had deserted me a long time ago and all my new "friends" were still down at the dz. It actually seemed like a good plan at the time. It's funny how the addiction starts controlling you. You don't even realize when it happens. I end up selling everything I owned at the pawn shop. Clothes, tv's, stereo's, jewelry. Even my car. The only thing I kept was my rig, tent, and the rest of my gear. It was pretty hot at the dz, so I didn't even need my sleeping bag. I hitched a ride back down and set up my new home in tent city. I still didn't think I had a problem. All I had to do was pack enough early in the day, then I'd have enough for a sandwich and some jump tickets. As long as I could get my fix, I'd be happy. And that's all I do now, pack and jump, pack and jump. "But at least I'm skydiving!", I thought. Well, that's my story. Thanks for listening. I gotten over the first hump. I admit that I am powerless over the sky....... Wait a minute, what am I saying. I'm happier now than I ever was with a house and a job. You guys are on your own. I'm gonna go make a skydive. See ya!!!

Grogs, Great idea. I would love for some of my closest whuffo friends to start jumping. I wouldn't mind shelling out for a couple of tandems. It would be worth it to have them hang out at the dz and to see their faces when they land. I'll test the 100:1 theory and report back on the results . -can't you trip like I do- Clubber

Michele, Oooh, I do so love sarcasm. -can't you trip like I do- Clubber

AA, Man, you're right. I never thought of it like that. I am kind of being a snob. I'm already putting down whuffo's, and next thing you know, I'll be pointing out other skydivers' inexperience in my posts. I should stop now before I really become a jackass. Or I could just screw around on the forum, continue jumping when I can, and continue to hang out with my whuffo friends like I'm already doing. I think I'll stick with what's working.

It's not my fault my landings suck. Every time I see the ground coming up at me, I start getting pissed that the skydive is over. I flare early so I get a couple extra seconds in the air. I just f'n hate being on the ground any longer than I have too!!!! -can't you trip like I do- Clubber

It's not Pyke's fault he likes to putt from the rough. -can't you trip like I do- Clubber

It just happened again. My friend in Berkeley talked me into flying up there next weekend to visit. My other friend in Santa Ana talked me into going to a barbeque for his Birthday on Sunday. So what is a skydiver to do???? I told the Berkeley guy I couldn't make it because of the birthday thing in Santa Ana, and I told the Santa Ana guy I couldn't make it because I already had tickets to San Francisco. Guess what I'm really doing next weekend?!?!?!? -can't you trip like I do- Clubber

I'm having the same problem. I can log in fine at work......at home.......nada. I manually deleted all the cookies and all the temp internet files. Nothing. Could it be an ip thing? -can't you trip like I do- Clubber

If they knew what I knew, they wouldn't be whuffo's. And if they weren't whuffo's they'd be jumping. And if they were jumping, they'd be at the dz. And if they were at the dz, then they's get to hang out with me. It all seems pretty simple if you think about it.

Yeah. There's tons of tents at Perris. Showers, washing machines, the whole lot. Cheap rooms down the street too. I live about an hour and 15 minutes away, but you could crash at my house if you wanted too. I'm sure Michele will be checking into the weekend packing class (I'll remind her). If we can set it up, we'll let you know. -can't you trip like I do- Clubber

They just don't get it, do they. They're all pissed at me now because I am NEVER around on the weekends anymore. Don't they realize I can't be wasting my time at the beach or in the bar or flying in to visit them. Every weekend moment I spend with them is a moment not jumping!!! I just tell them to drive down to the dropzone if they want to hang out with me. If not, so be it. I mean, what are they crying for. The dz has a bar and a pool. God, they're f'n selfish!!! Sorry for the unneccesary ramblings, but I just got of the phone with one of them who said, "You can drive an hour to skydive every weekend, but you can't drive down to visit me?!?!" My answer, "I'd drive down to you, but you don't have a plane." -can't you trip like I do- Clubber