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Dirtsucks

Who be drunk??

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All right. I’m wasted. I’ll admit it. But it brings up a point. Alcohol seems to be a popular topic, so just out of drunken curiosity, what’s the dumbest thing you’ve done because of being totally shit-wasted? I personally don’t have too many interesting stories to tell (there was the Wal-Mart bag incident, but I know somebody has to have something better than that!) So come on, humor my drunk ass!
Stick a fork in me, I’m done - Josh

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LOL. If you're still thinking clearly enough to use a spell checker and all that other stuff, you can't be all that drunk :P
Hmm, what comes to mind. So many choices...
I was out drinking with a friend one night. I was really wasted, but he was only mildly buzzed (he was driving). I don't remember much of the night, but we pulled into a fast food restraunt on the way home to get something to eat. My friend was telling me about it the next morning. Apparently, I was walking to the bathroom and I passed a girl, who proceeded to slap the crap out of me. She then walked up to my friend and said "You can tell your friend to kiss my ass!" and stormed off. As near as we could figure, I walked by and used my famous drunken pick-up line: "Hey, wanna ****" Despite the joke to the contrary, it has never worked for me :P

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josh,
funniest thing i ever did when i was drunk.. too many to name :) You could check my post from monday night(?) and see how lit i was. but i wasnt drinking. I think the name of the thread says it all "oh. forgot about this prt" or someting like that. Im sure youll get a good laugh out of that one. :)
froggie

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josh,
okay. ive taken some time to think about this one.. the most embarrasing thing i ever did was when i was 15. me and my ex had just broken up and we were all hanging out in these woods, next to a shoprite grocery store. well, me and him started fighting and somehow we ended up in the front of shoprite screaming inapropriate things at eachother.
ANother memory, funny enough its another shoprite memory : me and a different ex decided to put on halloween costumes (cow costumes), put baby powder and black makeup all over our faces, and skateboard thru the isles at shoprite at 3am. The night crew got a really good laugh out of that one.
i have a feeling that if you ask this same question sometime this summer than i can add "belting out the lyrics to Build me up buttercup" with stacy while dancing on the tiki bar :) that girl is gonna bring me down :) lol
froggie

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Careful, the ideas you’re planting in my head just might end me up in jail. But anyway, that, oddly enough, just brought back high school memories of in phy-ed, when we had to line dance to that buttercup song. That and “Stand” by REM. They really aren’t bad songs, but line dancing in phy-ed?!?! Christ! Talk about growing up in a hick town! Good story, though!
Josh

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dirtsucks,
dont worry. Here in jersey the kids have square dancing courses in the public schools. lol. so glad mommy decided to send me to a catholic school. Never had to dance in any of my classes. :)
Isnt Build me up THEEEEE most awesome song? oh my goodness. i go absolutely crazy every time i hear it. ah man, gotta find the buttercup cd with the four different versions of it on one cd.. gotta find the cd. must listen to the cd.
froggie

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Oh, man, square dancing. Sorry to say, I had to do that, too. In fact, I had to perform in front of my parents (and everybody else's parent's for that matter) in a show the school put on. I got to dance with a girl I liked, but it really didn't help one bit - I’m totally shy, so it actually compounded the embarrassment. Apparently it was such a terrible experience that I buried it in my head till now. I have to agree with a shirt a saw my uncle wear one time, it said “Real men don’t line dance”. I include square dancing in that, cause it’s close enough. Ya, know, I always wished I could just go back to when I was young, when everything was simpler. When all I had to worry about is where the hell that last Lego that I needed disappeared to. Thank you for proving me wrong, that whole being young/elementary school BS thing sucked ass!!! Being 23 and able to drink is waaayyyyyyy better!!! Froggie, you rule! Thanks for letting me see the light!
Totally screwed in the head - Josh
PS - That song still is awesome - go figure!

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just letting ya guys know....square dancing is the u.s. national folk dance.......now circle up, two by two, bow to your partner,....alamand left, dive for the oyster dive....man do i really remember al those calls, maybe it was when i was trying to inpress a nice "country" gal back home, or maybe it was phy-ed flashbacks...but remember it wasn't that bad, every once in a while ya got that hot gal/guy to be your partner!
<>

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Do you guyz know what a M.I.L.F. is? Well I was at a little shindig and i was getting pretty sloppy. After about 10pm all my good friends walk in and I'm already piss drunk and they are all sober. The owner of the house ( and mom of the girl i knew that lived there) comes walking downstairs and i introduce my self and i tell her i didnt know rachel( the girl that lived there) had a younger sister. The whole kitchen must have been focused on what i was doing and errupted in laughter. I didnt care, she was a hot mom, it was a fun drunk moment.
blue skies, cold beer, M.I.L.F. s
chris

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Good grief...I have all kinds of 'drunk and stupid' stories from my bartending days. Let's see...there's the one where I stripped down at a party and dove into the shallow end of the pool, smashing my face. Oh gawd, the worst I think is while I was at a meeting out-of-town and a bunch of us girls went out to this country-western dance club. We all drink way too much at these things, but I outdid myself that night since it was my birthday that weekend too. I tried riding the mechanical bull a couple of times (are you kidding me!? I couldn't ride that sober!) then told my friends I was going to the restroom. On the way there, I passed some girls lining up for a contest. I asked what they were doing and decided that it sounded like it would be fun, so joined in, forgetting all about the bathroom. A few minutes later my friends (and boyfriend at the time) got to watch drunk-ass me climb way up on this DJ booth (thank heavens I didn't fall off! LOL!) and join in a fake-orgasm contest. *blush* I *did* win second anyway (the girl after me cheated..she copied!).
(sorry Merrick...I know my drunk stories make you 'proud'..lol)
That's the only one I will share...it would just get worse from there :) I was very bad for a while :/
Pammi

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lol oh my drunk stories...I could publish novels lol. The last story happened just about 2 weeks ago, I was at the Staples center...Fruce you know this one already...lol. Anyways me and my friend we're all decked out in our Playboy tops and leather and these guys we met there were like it is impossible to embarrass me. So me, being the wiseass I am looks at my friend like he has no idea, she smiles and all the sudden I drop to my knees and start freaking out, and so I yell out loud "oh My Gosh, Oh MY GOSH...I left my vibrator in the suite" LMAO yes yes the guys were dying laughing, and as I rose back to my feet I was applauded by the MANY onlookers lol....thank you thank you!
**BLUE ONES**

BITE ME.... :P

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Alright...one more story...that very same night...lol yes there's more...as I was leaving the people who work there ask you if you had a good time...and I looked over at the guys who we met, and I said not as good as I thought it was going to be. He knew I was going to embarrass him...lol...again...and I did...the Staples Center is quite huge, and it holds alot of people, and they all leave at the same time...and as we were walking out the doors I yelled "All I wanted was an orgasm!...is that too much for a girl to ask for? It's not like I was asking for alot, just one orgasm" lol the look on people's faces was priceless...lol however the guy was rad, and he picked me up and put me over his shoulder and spanked my a** and said don't worry guys I'll take care of her lol
oh boy what a night lol
**BLUE ONES**

BITE ME.... :P

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