jumpjunkie2004 0 #1 May 24, 2006 My 14 year old son is supposed to be home at 3. He strolled in just now at 5. He claims he was at the library. So...do I punish him? I've been driving around looking for him and I've been worried. I've called 1/2 a dozen different families looking for him. I'm so mad right now, I can't think straight...Jump, Land, Pack, Repeat... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Conundrum 1 #2 May 24, 2006 I don't know if you should punish him, but I'd make clear that next time he won't be getting off scott free and you don't appreciate not being called or told that he was going to the library (if that's even where he was). Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
FallinWoman 1 #3 May 24, 2006 I believe in consequences. I think there should be some sort of punishment for beling AWOL for 2 hours. In our family it would probably be a loss of priveledge the next time an opportunity came for some freedom, be it a party, going to a friend's house, going to the pool alone.... ~Anne I'm a Doll!!!! Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Broke 0 #4 May 24, 2006 I would say just ask him to give you a heads up Next time he is going to the "Library." Also Why don't you ask what he was working on. Engage him. If there is something intellectual you can talk about it might make him feel better, as well as yourself.Divot your source for all things Hillbilly. Anvil Brother 84 SCR 14192 Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Lindercles 0 #5 May 24, 2006 Have you smelled his breath? Checked his eyes? Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Kid_Icarus 0 #6 May 24, 2006 I'd ask him what her name was..... seriously. Think of the things we were doing at 15. Big picture, you're prolly a good parent, which means he's prolly a good kid. Kids are mischiefous. Let him know rules are rules and they're there for his benifit, even if he doesn't realize it. Then let it go. ________________________________________ "What What..... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
turtlespeed 212 #7 May 24, 2006 QuoteMy 14 year old son is supposed to be home at 3. He strolled in just now at 5. He claims he was at the library. So...do I punish him? I've been driving around looking for him and I've been worried. I've called 1/2 a dozen different families looking for him. I'm so mad right now, I can't think straight... Call the library and verify. If it's true - then - explain that the rules are rules - and ground the little scamp for a month! If it's not - Ground the little scamp for two months.I'm not usually into the whole 3-way thing, but you got me a little excited with that. - Skymama BTR #1 / OTB^5 Official #2 / Hellfish #408 / VSCR #108/Tortuga/Orfun Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
airtwardo 6 #8 May 24, 2006 Do you have a reason to mistrust him? (Other than the fact he's 14) You 'could' go to the library with him now and see if anyone remembers him... Or you could make it a point that he MUST contact you as to his whereabouts 'next' time...and check up on him. I have a 14 year old and two 15 year olds...the checking up thing is QUITE enlightening. ~ If you choke a Smurf, what color does it turn? ~ Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jumpjunkie2004 0 #9 May 24, 2006 There is an asylum room somewhere with my name plate on the door : ( I'm going to let him slide this time. We've discussed the rules (again). He doesn't smell like booze, or anything else. That's a good thing.Jump, Land, Pack, Repeat... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
jumpjunkie2004 0 #10 May 24, 2006 He did give me the names of some other kids that were there. I'm going to call to verify it just as a back up. Thanks for making me look at this a different way. Initially, I was just going to ground him for a week.Jump, Land, Pack, Repeat... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Icon134 0 #11 May 24, 2006 it sounds as if you've worked it out... and I have nothing to add... just figured I'd stalk... Livin' on the Edge... sleeping with my rigger's wife... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Cudlo 0 #12 May 24, 2006 heh, consider yourself lucky. Around that age I wouldn't be home for a couple days without a word... probably explains why both my parents started having white hair early_________________________________________ "People demand freedom of speech to make up for the freedom of thought which they avoid." - Kierkegaard Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
wmw999 2,146 #13 May 24, 2006 The consequences for something like that for my son would have been not being able to go straight from school somewhere for something desirable. "After all, I can't be sure about where you are." It's more of a hassle, but it means that if it was something that you wanted him to go to, you'd get to pick him up and embarrassingly drop him off, checking with the adults there about when he was going to get home. It doesn't take many times like that for the lesson to sink in We didn't have to do that particular one (that was an area that our son was extremely responsible), but we sure did in others. Embarrassment is an extremely powerful motivating factor. Wendy W.There is nothing more dangerous than breaking a basic safety rule and getting away with it. It removes fear of the consequences and builds false confidence. (tbrown) Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
Icon134 0 #14 May 24, 2006 I had a high school friend who's curfew was to that he had to call w/in at least 3 days... he was one of like 4 boys and his parents were college professors (the kids weren't stupid either... one of his brothers would see spend the first half of his school quarters dong literally nothing then the second half seeing how high a grade he could get by the end ) I recall one year another of his brothers called from Florida... to let his parents know he would be down there for spring break... Livin' on the Edge... sleeping with my rigger's wife... Quote Share this post Link to post Share on other sites
