Teaching kids self defense

[Twoply 0]

My son is going to preschool in the morning. I never really thought about bullies since I was in school myself. Now I'm not concerned with there being very many bullies in his 3-4 year old class but I am comitted to teaching him how to defend himself now and as he grows older.

My dad taught us basic boxing and some really nasty street fighting as kids. I've used some of it in self defense and it's proven it's value.

My question is have you put your kids into some form of martial arts or formal training? If so, how has the experience gone for your kids?

I'm pretty sure I'm going to pursue it if not to help train him in self defense, but also to provide self confidence and self reliance.

[Squeak 17]

School slection is of the UTMOST impprtance.
you dont want a schoolthat just teaches combat arts.

You are not now, nor will you ever be, good enough to not die in this sport (Sparky)
My Life ROCKS!
How's yours doing?

[Conundrum 1]

I plan on putting Aiden (now 10 moths) in some form of martial art for self defense (only).

I think it's good for a child to know how to protect themselves in a scenario where they need to. Hopefully there will never be that case, but you never know and I would rather be safe than sorry.

[lawrocket 3]

My experience is that martial arts are overrated. I never had martial arts, but have had experience to defend myself - especially as a kid.

A key reason is pyschology. I plan to tell my son that if he is confronted, tell everyone around that this is his warning. "Hey, guys, when this thing blows up, I just wsnted to point out that he's acting out of line, and I'm not starting it." This has worked for me several times in the past.

Of course, bullies never act alone. If it doesn't work, you may wish to tell your kid to tell the bully, "Even your friends think you're a pussy and can't take me alone. I can't take all four of you but how about just you and me? I'll tell you what, i;ll find you when you're alone and I'll kick your ass then without your friends." That's worked, too.

The other thing is that if a fight seems inevitable, martial arts are nowhere near as effective as a haymaker to the chops. Bullies don't expect the victim to fight back. Martial arts are one thing, but the unexpeced blast (after step one! Always put them on notice to back off) cannot be defended.

And they NEVER expect it.

The best way to deal with a hazard is to get out of it. If that doesn't work, you get the first shot and make it count to end it. Odds of a win in a fight are highrest when the opponent has no chance to fight back.

Check out Ralphie in "A Christmas Story." It's a perfect example,

My wife is hotter than your wife.

[JackC 0]

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The other thing is that if a fight seems inevitable, martial arts are nowhere near as effective as a haymaker to the chops. Bullies don't expect the victim to fight back. Martial arts are one thing, but the unexpeced blast (after step one! Always put them on notice to back off) cannot be defended.

And they NEVER expect it.

I dunno, I've blocked jabs that came completely out of the blue. I wouldn't have been able to do that if I hadn't been doing loads of MA training. Haymakers you can see coming a mile away, there are much better things to do.

A lot of martial arts are overrated though, not least because they take a long time to get proficient. I reckon the best bang for the buck is wresling and boxing or kick boxing. Some eastern martial arts and their variants are OK, most are overrated though. Whatever MA you try, training without sparring is like skydiving without ever jumping out of a plane. And pick something agressive.

[ChrisL 2]

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My experience is that martial arts are overrated. I never had martial arts, but have had experience to defend myself - especially as a kid.

Interesting.

You just labeled something that you have no experience with as over rated.

How then are you rating it?

I'm afraid that your advice here, while certainly well intentioned, isn't realistic, or even true.

Your belief that bullies never expect you to fight back is extremely naive. They often do expect it.

If the person being bullied has no experience or training in how to throw a punch, they are far more likely to either miss completely, or if they do score, the strike will deliver no real energy to the target.
It will most likely just startle (and further anger) the bully.

If that one big haymaker doesn't score and do real damage, which is the most likely outcome for an untrained inexperienced kid, the person throwing it will then get the shit kicked out of them because they have NO idea how to follow it up.

Life isn't like it appears on TV or in the movies. It would be nice if it was,
but its not.

My position and statements are the result of a lot of direct personal experience, both as one who was bulled, as the friend of people that were bullied, as one that ultimately turned the table on the bullies and put an end to it, and as one that has trained regularly and hard in martial arts for years.

I'm a peaceful man. I will ALWAYS try to talk it out or even walk away to avoid a fight. Sometimes its unavoidable, though. You cant always
talk your way out, and some times trying to walk away will more likely get you hurt than standing your ground.
If I have no other option though, I will take the fight directly to them and knowing how to do that is critical.

The one big haymaker isnt gonna save the day.

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My mighty steed

[sv3n 0]

Pick something that your child wants to do, make sure they work on values, and stop by yourself and sit in on a class and make sure you're comfortable with the people and how they teach. As far as what art or discipline........that's really personal taste.

There's two types of martial arts, sport martial arts which are intended to be sports like Karate and UFC fighting.....they are based on rules, they are meant for a one on one match, and have limitations. Then you have combat martial arts, which tend not to be flashy, there are no rules, and things are straight to be point.

Just remember giving your kid the skills is no good if the teacher isn't teaching the mental skills as to when to use the physical ones. The physical part is the last resort and should only be used when every other option has failed. The mental training is what builds the confidence.

There's no need for it to be an aggressive sport either...........you gotta think about the longevity of the players in the sport. Look at a Muay Thai Kickboxer and then compare that to someone who's been doing non-aggressive martial art....Aikido for instance. Muay Thai Kickboxing is very aggressive, but there's no longevity....most of those guys are done by their mid twenties and are beat to hell. The aikido guys have grandmasters that train up to the end of their lives.

Pick something with some lineage, something authentic. There's way too many Mc Dojo's out there, "we're Ed's House of Pain and we'll teach you to beat people up". That's not really what you want to teach your kid.

Also, you want to keep your child interested..........things like boxing and kickboxing have a handful of manuevers and that's that. You teach them an art and it takes a lifetime to learn and a lifetime of entertainment and teaching. Plus you learn a lot of things in authentic martial arts like weapons.....swords, knives, chain weapons, bo staff.....things like that will keep your child interested.

Here's a list of martial arts....http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_martial_arts

...and you're in violation of your face!

[ChrisL 2]

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Whatever MA you try, training without sparring is like skydiving without ever jumping out of a plane. And pick something agressive.

True. But you had best spar hard. MA training build a lot of muscle memory, also like skydiving.

If you regularly train to pull your punches, when you have a crisis and no time to think you will react just like you trained.

Spar. Wear protective gear. Hit hard.

Dont train soft or when the time comes you will hit soft.

__

My mighty steed

[warpedskydiver 0]

Most martial arts taught in classes will be useless to a kid in a real fight.

You may want to focus on something that will be less of a sport and based more in defending yourself and prevailing in a fight against multiple attackers.

Bullies run in gangs.(I was attacked nearly every day in grade school by at least five to seven kids)

Eight grade was around 60 fights some including kids with steel pipes, chains, and one knife attack.

(I went to school with the worst kids in the entire district which were all dumped in our school)

We had regular visits in my school by some students probation officers.

I was driven home several times by our Dean of Students, he told me "I was a scrapper back when I was young" and smiled at me as he drove me home.

He told me "You did good, and those kids deserved everything they got"

Krav Magaw, Savate, and plain old H2H are most effective at this.

Look up "The Black Arts" or get a copy of one of the military unarmed combat manuals, and practice, practice, practice, and then some more.

Get proper headgear and let him wail on you, while you defend.

Teach choke holds, and the way to deliver a proper punch and foot sweep in a combo.

Kicks above the waist will get you killed.

[warpedskydiver 0]

I have the "Black Arts" in .pdf form if anyone wants it.

I would rate it as being very good and essential in saving your life.

There are many sources for info but this one is good, and not a restricted document (unclass).
IM me and I will send these via email.

[MLKSKY 0]

Choi Kwang Do is a unique martial art based on scientific principles (moves that do not damage the joints) and developed to promote optimum health, fitness (lots of cardio in the drills) and self-defense, not winners in sports competitions (no one competes).

I highly recommend it because CKD is a MA that is usable in various situations where an individual is being attacked.

As for training with guidance from a book, there is much lacking there--instruction from a professional can help build a solid foundation and help one from developing poor form from the start and prevent injury from poor form.

And, the MA is not just for self defense, but to build a child's self esteem and integrity--There is a tiny tigers program offered at many CKD dojangs for children age 3-6, and I highly recommend it. Part of their code is "To always do my best and never give up; to obey my parents and teachers; to be courteous and always use my manners, and to NEVER misuse what I learn in class."

Please check out the website for more info http://www.choikwangdo.com/t-AboutCKD.aspx

[JackC 0]

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If you regularly train to pull your punches, when you have a crisis and no time to think you will react just like you trained.

Spar. Wear protective gear. Hit hard.

Dont train soft or when the time comes you will hit soft.

Exactly. If you train to pull a punch, guess what happens...

Not that other martial arts can't be fun, I really enjoy iaido but it is virtually useless.

[lawrocket 3]

You raise valid points, Chris.

My wife is hotter than your wife.

[Nightingale 0]

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My experience is that martial arts are overrated.

When I used kenpo to save my life, I sure as hell didn't think it was overrated.

I think the most important thing kenpo did for me was teach me that yes, I can fight back against someone bigger and stronger and still have a chance. The second most important thing kenpo did for me was to give me some tools to fight with. I took those tools, I used them, and I got myself out of a situation that would have been very bad. Sure, what I did might not have worked, but kenpo gave me the ability to do something, when without it, I probably would've just been frozen with fear. Kenpo gave me the ability to push the fear aside and fight back hard to save myself. Without all my training, I couldn't have done that.

Good quality martial arts instruction for street situations is NOT overrated.

[ChrisL 2]

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Not that other martial arts can't be fun, I really enjoy iaido but it is virtually useless.

Hey, theres always the chance that we will end up living in a post-apocolyptic, non-technological society in which sword skills
will mean the difference between living and dying!

Well, one can hope, right?

I train some Eishin Ryu and and Meishin Musu Ryu Iaido

Very much fun, but not much use unless I happened to be walking around with my katana
Edited to add that the only katana's I own are not parachutes

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My mighty steed

[airkid 0]

well when i was young (and growing up in inner city) it was always the boys who claimed to have been in martial arts to do the bullying... i was never a bully nor was i directly affected by bullying, simply because i knew good communication skills... don't get me wrong i have been in fights and can fight very hard if need be but i'd prefer to take a more diplomatic approach. i think you should be more concerned with teaching your child good social habits than how to physically engage another person.

[JackC 0]

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the only katana's I own are not parachutes

Here's one I made earlier.

[WatchYourStep 0]

I had between 2-3 of martial arts training when I was younger. I think the lessons I learned from it were far greater than just self defense. It was a great time and I'm glad my parents allowed me to get involved with it.

However for most run-ins I've had (and they are far and few as I'd rather try to talk a situation through then go to blows) I've found I use my 7 years of wrestling more then my martial arts, however your mileage may vary.

"You start off your skydiving career with a bag full of luck and an empty bag of experience. The trick is to fill the bag of experience up before your bag of luck runs out."

[ChrisL 2]

Beautiful hamon.

You forge it yourself or just temper it?

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My mighty steed

[Richards 0]

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My son is going to preschool in the morning. I never really thought about bullies since I was in school myself. Now I'm not concerned with there being very many bullies in his 3-4 year old class but I am comitted to teaching him how to defend himself now and as he grows older.

My dad taught us basic boxing and some really nasty street fighting as kids. I've used some of it in self defense and it's proven it's value.

My question is have you put your kids into some form of martial arts or formal training? If so, how has the experience gone for your kids?

I'm pretty sure I'm going to pursue it if not to help train him in self defense, but also to provide self confidence and self reliance.

I suspect boxing is a good one (although I sucked at it). Anything overly exotic with too many variants of kicks/flips/chops/holds/pressure-points violates the Keep-it-simple rule. Something not overly artsy but more full contact is good so he is used to getting hit and having to get himself out of a corner.

I really do not know enough about the oriental martial arts to give an opinion one way or another on those so my bias will be boxing.

How huge of a problem is this at the pre-school level? Secondly do they have such training for that age group?

My biggest handicap is that sometimes the hole in the front of my head operates a tad bit faster than the grey matter contained within.

[JackC 0]

It's the first one I made. A hand forged tanto from W2 tool steel, differentially hardened using the traditional clay method. I also made a Khukri and a european style pillow sword which needs finishing. Unfortunately my forge wasn't really big enough to do anything larger than a wakisashi and it got trashed when I moved house.

[ChrisL 2]

Very cool. I've never tried myself.

Perhaps someday.

I have a beautiful hand forged, folded, clay tempered katana that I use for Iai, and I have a Cold Steel katana thats a serious cleaver
but is far too heavy for Iai.

I'll use that if any immortals ever come looking for my head

__

My mighty steed

[warpedskydiver 0]

Very Cool

[JackC 0]

That sounds really cool. I'd like to get a really nice katana at some point but for now I've got an old japanese gunto. I was lucky to find one that was traditionally made by a half competent smith but it took me several years and hundreds of peices of junk to find it. It actually doesn't make a bad iai-to believe it or not.

[ChrisL 2]

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That sounds really cool. I'd like to get a really nice katana at some point but for now I've got an old japanese gunto. I was lucky to find one that was traditionally made by a half competent smith but it took me several years and hundreds of peices of junk to find it. It actually doesn't make a bad iai-to believe it or not.

I've occasionally thought about learning how to forge one just because getting a real nice, well made blade is a very expensive proposition if you want it forged, folded, and tempered in the traditional way.

My hand forged iaito has a half decent blade, but shitty tsuba, menuki, and kashira. I plan to replace them at some point with better furnishings.

Even finding someone that can rebuild and re-wrap the tsuka costs a ton...

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My mighty steed